Thanks to Amy, FlyingZoe and Mystery00Meat for their amazing reviews, you are the thing that keeps me posting. Only 20 more reviews to 100! Hope you all enjoy this chapter. Also, the third part to Lucie's two stories is up on my account, so check it out. And also check out the sequel to Living Fast, Dying Young! x

Chapter 25- I'm Scared Tom

It was ten o'clock by the time everyone had finished their cake and half an hour later, the mood in the house had become dramatically subdued. Libby and Sam were fast asleep on the couch, curled up beside Tom and Harry. Danny and Dougie sat sleepily in the other two remaining armchairs as Shrek played on the screen.

'I now see why all parents are so damn tired and grumpy,' Danny yawned, watching the screen with tired eyes.

'I know. Should we take them up to bed do you think?' Tom asked, sitting up a bit straighter and stretching.

Danny nodded sleepily. 'Take me too.'

'You are perfectly capable of walking Mr Jones,' Tom chuckled, gently picking Libby up from beside him.

'So are they! But you don't make them walk!' Danny protested.

'They're little. You're big. Go figure,' Tom replied with a shrug as Libby yawned in his arms. Harry picked up Sam and together they silently carried the dozing children up to the spare room. They didn't stir as they tucked them into bed, leaving the hall light on and closing the door over halfway, letting a beam of light flood over the beds.

'Goodnight,' Tom whispered as he left the room, looking back over his shoulder at the two small sleeping silhouettes curled up in the beds. He smiled to himself. He'd enjoy this one day he thought. Having kids of his own. With a small smile, he followed Harry back down to the living room.

'So Tom, what did Jane say?' Dougie asked immediately as Tom sat down on the couch.

'Do I have to tell you now?' he groaned.

'Yes!' three voices answered.

'Fine.'

And with that, Tom replayed Jane's story to the other three, met by gasps of shock, horror and sadness at what had happened.

'How could he do something like that?' Harry muttered disbelievingly.

'I know. But he's locked up now. He's gone. It's all going to be fine,' Tom said soothingly, watching the looks of his upset-looking bandmates. Harry looked livid. Danny looked tired and worn, the sadness showing on his face. But Dougie looked blank. He had no expression. He was away in his thoughts.

'Come on then guys, let's get some sleep. We've got a huge day tomorrow,' Tom said quietly, switching off the TV. Harry and Danny nodded silently, beginning to climb the stairs in front of Dougie and Tom. Dougie still looked blank as he climbed slowly, nodding a goodnight at Tom before shutting his door behind him. Unsatisfied with how Dougie had looked, Tom marched inside after him.

'Tom?' Dougie asked quietly from his bathroom, toothbrush in hand.

'Dougie, come sit with me for a bit,' Tom murmured, sitting on the edge of Dougie's bed. Dougie put his toothbrush back on the bench and took a seat beside Tom, wringing his hands in his lap.

'Please tell me what the matter is,' Tom said gently.

'I just feel for them Tom,' Dougie replied quietly. He took a deep breath.

'My father always ruined Christmas. He'd get drunk Christmas Eve, then come home and ruin the rest of everything. He criticised everything we gave each other or asked for, and told me when I was five that Santa wasn't real. I watched him abuse my mother for years, even when I was as old as the twins. I remember everything. They say that they don't understand. They don't, but they know something isn't right,' Dougie said, a tear running down his cheek.

Tom put an arm over his shoulder. 'I know Doug, but we're going to make this Christmas amazing, okay? It's all going to be fine,' he said with a small smile.

'It doesn't matter!' Dougie shouted and Tom looked taken aback. 'It's always going to be the same! He's always going to be there to ruin everything! Even just walking into the house brings back memories! I can't do this Tom! I can't live anymore knowing he ruined my childhood for good and has ruined my life! I can't! I just can't!' Dougie broke down, his whole body trembling as he began to cry.

Tom, shocked at Dougie's outburst, grabbed him in a tight hug. 'Dougie, he's gone, he's not coming back. He's not here to ruin it anymore mate, he can't. It's in the past, it's something you have to forget about. You have your whole life ahead of you, your whole life with the band, and you're going to throw it away because of something that happened in the past?' Tom asked firmly, and Dougie nodded silently, tears staining his cheeks.

'You can't give up Dougie. You can't. I know how hard it is for you. Believe me. But you can't give up. You can't leave us three here to fend for ourselves. We'd die without you Dougie,' Tom murmured, holding him close.

'But Tom, I can't do it,' Dougie whispered into his chest.

Tom hugged him tighter. 'You can Dougie, I know you can. We know you can. And we're here for you the whole way. I promise.'

'I'm scared Tom.'

'Scared of what?' Tom gently lifted Dougie's face from his chest, watching his expression. Dougie looked at the floor. 'What are you scared of?' he repeated gently.

'I'm scared that Libby and Sam will grow up like me. Angry. I'm scared that their lives are going to be tainted for what happened, especially when they're so young. I know they're scared and confused. I know how they feel. I just don't want them growing up broken.' Dougie's voice shook on the last word and a few silent tears ran down his cheeks.

'I know Dougie, I know. But we're going to be there for them. As long as they want. As long as Jane wants. We'll be like their big brothers. We're going to look after them. We're going to help them. We'll be the male figures in their life that every kid needs. Something you never had. We can help them Dougie, and you know it,' Tom said unwaveringly. Dougie nodded tearfully.

'Those men are gone. Out of their lives. Sure, they left a big dent in them, but they're gone. They can't hurt them anym-,' Tom trailed off looking at Dougie's face, 'what?'

'They can hurt them. Not directly. But mentally Tom. They can remember.'

'But they're so young. You don't know that they'd remember Dougie, heck, I barely remember anything from when I was three.'

'Believe me Tom. You remember,' Dougie said quietly, leaning into Tom's shoulder.

'Doug, please,' Tom murmured, encasing him in another hug.

Dougie sighed, more tears running down his pale cheeks. 'Tom can I ask you something stupid?'

'I'm sure it's not stupid at all.'

'Will you sleep here tonight? With me?' Dougie asked, looking down in embarrassment.

'Of course Doug,' Tom smiled, hugging him tighter. 'I'll just go get ready for bed if you want and I'll come back okay?'

'Okay,' Dougie replied quietly. Tom gave him another smile and got up, leaving the room.

Dougie sighed, getting up and getting his toothbrush from the bench. He wanted to believe Tom. Really, he did. But he couldn't. He knew Tom didn't fully understand, he couldn't. But just knowing someone was there for him meant the world.