Chapter 25 A Mother Knows

When Rory woke up the next morning, she expected, as normal, to find Jess fast asleep beside her. Every morning, she woke up before him and would find him in various sleep positions. Most were normal, like on his back, on his stomach, but sometimes they were a bit odd, like the time she found him sleeping with his feet on the pillow and his head at the end of the bed. Once, she found him with his clothes half on and half off: one leg of his jeans on, one sock. Another time, he was sleeping with the pillow over his face with one foot on the floor.

That morning, she found him in the most frightening sleep position ever: not asleep. When she woke up, Jess wasn't in bed. For a moment, Rory thought he might have been in the bathroom, but when she checked, the bathroom was empty.

"Jess?" she called through the quiet and empty house. A moment later, Paul Anka appeared at her side. "No, boy, not you. Do you know where Jess is?" The dog barked in response. "I really wish I spoke dog."

Rory crept upstairs, just in case he was asleep up there somewhere, but she ended up creeping around an empty house. She looked everywhere and there was no Jess. She looked outside and her car was parked in the driveway, but she noticed that Luke's truck was gone.

"He probably drove the truck to the hospital for Luke," Rory said, still talking to Paul Anka. "We drove Luke to the hospital yesterday, so they're stuck there." But then, she started thinking more about it, she started having doubts that Jess had taken Luke's truck to him.

When Luke found out that Lorelai was pregnant, he dragged her car shopping. Since the Jeep didn't have a door to the back seat, it would make getting the baby in and out of the car seat difficult. It took them the first trimester, but Luke managed to find a sedan that she would drive: a Mercury Milan. There was already a baby seat strapped into the back of the car, so it would have made much more sense for Jess to drive the car.

Rory picked up the phone and called Luke's cell phone to see if Jess was with him. As soon as he answered, she was sorry that she called.

"Good morning, Rory," Luke yawned. "What's up?"

"Luke, I'm sorry. Did I wake you up?"

"Not really. I've been sleeping on and off all night. What time is it?"

"Quarter to eight. That's why I'm calling."

"You're calling because it's 7:45?"

"No, I'm calling because it's 7:45 and I don't know where Jess is."

"Is that like when the newscasters ask where your children are at the beginning of the eleven o'clock news?"

"Sort of. Is he there?"

"Are you kidding? It's 7:45. He's probably sleeping. Have you checked under the bed?"

"Under the bed?"

"Maybe he fell out of bed and rolled under it?"

"What?"

"Your mom's idea."

"Ah. So, you haven't talked to him? You didn't ask him to drive you his truck or send him anyplace?"

"No. Why? Where's my truck?"

"Wherever Jess is. Luke, you need to keep up. Come on, I know that you speak near-fluent Gilmore!"

"You don't know where either Jess or my truck is right now?"

"That would be correct. Luke, I am so sorry. I promise, as soon as I find him, and your truck, I will call you."

"Call me about Jess. And Rory, forget about the truck. If I hear from him, I'll call you. Kid, he's fine. You know that, right?"

"Yeah, I know," Rory said, but she didn't believe a word of it. "How's mom?"

"She's right here. She just finished feeding Matthew. Do you want to talk to her?"

"Maybe later. I need to find Jess. Kiss her like I would and give Matty a kiss, too. Thanks Luke, I'll talk to you later," Rory said, quickly hanging up before Luke could argue or put her mom on the phone.

Rory paced around the living room in her pajamas trying to figure out where Jess would go and what would possess him to drive Luke's truck anywhere. She needed to think, and in order to think, she needed sustenance. She made a pot of coffee and threw a Pop-Tart into the toaster. She decided to wander through the house to help motivate her thinking.

It seemed so strange being in the house she grew up in and yet being in a completely different place at the same time. She had lived there for years and it was her home, but since she left home and her mom moved in with Luke, a lot changed. Now, there was a nursery where the upstairs alcove used to be. Luke painted the room pale yellow and he made a crib. Lorelai turned an old dresser into a changing table and made a crib quilt and curtains from hers and Luke's old t-shirts and sweatshirts.

Rory opened the top drawer of the dresser, which was filled with tiny diapers, packages of wipes, and containers of baby powder, baby lotion, diaper rash ointment, and lots of other baby stuff. The lower drawers had a few sleepers and blankets that had been gifts from the baby shower Sookie, Babette, and Miss Patty threw for Lorelai. Before she realized what she was doing, she was sniffing the baby lotion and her mind was wandering. She started thinking about the fact that when her mother was her age that she was the mother of an eight year old.

Rory felt like she was lagging behind some sort of schedule, like she missed out on some life event by waiting too long to join in. In a way, it made her feel like she had at her first junior high dance when she and Lane sat in chairs along the side of the gymnasium for the first two and a half hours before they got up and danced, having a great time and missing out on spending more time having fun and less time being shy. Now, something was making her feel like she needed to make up for lost time. She felt like she and Jess should be moving forward and should be at a different stage in their lives now, so it was like they were both lagging behind. She loved him. She wanted to take their relationship to a new level. They were serious and committed and they were living together, but she wanted something more. Something tangible. Something that would last forever.

Suddenly, she knew what happened to Jess. He was spooked. Big time, seriously spooked. The day before, the whole thing with the baby, it totally freaked him out. She felt sick to her stomach at the thought that anything she said or implied had spooked him enough to make him run away. She thought about every other time Jess left her life without saying goodbye. He had told her that this time would be different, but she did too much to freak him out and drive him away.

It was her fault. She said too much. Her own minor freak out had facilitated Jess' major freak out and was the reason that he was MIA. She tried to rationalize, knowing that she did not necessarily have the ability to make Jess disappear without a word. She thought that maybe he had another reason for leaving in the wee hours of the morning without a note or an explanation of where he was going or why. She wracked her brain trying to think of something that could have prompted such a sudden disappearing act. If it wasn't Luke, she couldn't imagine anything or anyone else making him drop and run.

"Stupid, stupid, stupid! What is the matter with me? What you have with Jess is perfect just the way it is, so why did you have to go muck it all up?" She walked into her mother and Luke's bedroom and flopped herself down on the bed. "This must be what a ticking biological clock feels like."

She suddenly popped up, her head clear with a brilliant, albeit obvious, idea. She picked up the phone and dialed Jess' cell phone number.

"Hello?" a distracted voice answered just before the voice mail picked up.

"Jess? It's Rory."

"Hey, hon."

"Hey, hon? Hey, hon! What do you mean, hey hon?"

"I mean, hello, Rory, honey, love of my life, and how are you doing this lovely autumn morning?"

"Where are you?"

"I'm on the road," Jess replied cryptically. "I know that is not the best answer or the one you were hoping for, but it's all I can give you without ruining it."

"Ruining what?"

"It. I am not going to say anything else about it but it because it is a surprise. I will be back before dinner. You need to promise me that you won't eat until I come home."

"You have a surprise for me?" Rory asked, crying.

"Yeah. Sweetie, what's wrong? Why are you crying?"

"I woke up and you were gone. You and Luke's truck gone, disappeared, and God-knows where. My imagination started to get the best of me and, well, I freaked."

"Didn't you get my note?"

"Note? What note?"

"Where's your cell phone?"

"My what?"

"Your cell phone. You know, that small mobile communication device that you never go anywhere without."

"Huh?"

"Rory!" Jess exclaimed, exasperated. "I left you a note and I stuck it inside your cell phone."

"What?" Rory asked, forcing the pieces to put themselves together in her brain. "Hang on, let me go find it."

Rory ran down the stairs and left the phone sitting on her mom's bed. She skidded in her socks around the corner into the kitchen and slid to a stop in her bedroom, where she found her cell phone with a folded piece of paper stuck inside it. Rory grabbed the note and sprinted back up the stairs.

"I am sorry," Rory said when she got back to the phone. "I just found the note, Jess. I didn't see it. I am so sorry."

"You thought I bolted," Jess said with a knowing smile.

"No," Rory said quickly as she read the note, which was scrawled with a black Sharpie marker in Jess' slanted handwriting. Rory, I had to run a few errands this morning, so I borrowed Luke's truck. I hope you had a good night's sleep. I will call you later and I'll see you for dinner. I love you, Jess. Jess had drawn a heart next to his name. "Yes," Rory admitted begrudgingly. "I thought I freaked you out and took off."

"Rory, I told you that I wasn't freaked out."

"Well, I didn't completely believe you. I thought that maybe it was a delayed reaction freak out."

"I think you were the one who freaked out."

"That's completely beside the point."

"You thought I freaked out about the baby thing."

"I did," Rory confessed. "I thought you freaked because it sort of freaked me out, too."

"I promise you, Rory, I did not freak out and we will talk about your freak out when I get home."

"You promise?"

"I totally promise. I love you, babe," Jess said, smiling to himself. "It will take a lot more than one baby freak out to change that. I promise you, I did not freak and I don't feel a freak out coming anytime in the near future."

"I love you, too. I'm sorry I freaked out."

"I know you are. I'll see you later."

"Bye," Rory said.

"Bye, Rory." Jess clicked his phone off and smiled, shaking his head. Her talk about babies did freak him out a little, but not the way he thought.

When she first said the words our baby, he did freak, but it was because he thought that she telling him that she was pregnant. They had always been so careful with the condoms and the pill; he was upset when he thought he'd gotten her pregnant. Eventually, he wanted to get her pregnant, but the pregnancy was not supposed to be the first step in his master plan. First, he wanted to propose, then he wanted to marry her, buy her a house and then he wanted to make a baby with her. He had only hesitated on starting the process because he didn't think Rory was ready. Now, with the baby freak out, he had the feeling that Rory was ready.

In the middle of the night, Jess decided that it was time to start putting his plan into motion. He woke up very early so that he could slip out while Rory was still asleep. He left her the note and snuck out of the house. He borrowed Luke's truck and drove to New York so that he could buy the perfect engagement ring for Rory. He had seen it in an antique store in Greenwich Village months earlier and he was hoping that it was still there.

When Rory called, he was just crossing the George Washington Bridge and he hoped that Rory wouldn't be able to hear the traffic. Now, he was in full-on road rage mode and driving Luke's ancient truck did not give him much street credit. He fought for a parking space that was about ten blocks from the antique store and he practically ran down the sidewalk to the store.

"Can I help you?" the store clerk asked when Jess burst into the store.

"Yes, at least I hope so," Jess began. "I was here a few weeks ago and I looked at an engagement ring. I'd like to look at it again."

"Well, we have quite a few engagements rings. What are you looking for?"

"It was silver with a big diamond in the middle with smaller diamonds and etchings around the band."

"I think I might know what ring you're referring to," the clerk said as she crossed the room to a display case. "It's from the 1930s. It's made of 18-carat white gold, not silver, with a quarter carat round cut diamond and seven small inset diamonds around the band. We also have a matching wedding band and coordinating men's wedding band as well. Here it is," she said, unlocking the display case and holding the ring out to Jess.

"That's it," Jess said smiling. "It's perfect. Wait," he said, reaching into his pocket and fishing around for something. "Here's a ring of hers. Will this ring fit her?"

"You're right," she said with a polite smile. "It is perfect. They both are. The rings will be a perfect fit."

"How much are they?"

"The engagement ring is $950 and the wedding band is $495, but if you buy the set, it's $1250."

"Looks like I'll be getting the set," Jess said with a smile. He pulled out his wallet and handed her a credit card.

"Congratulations," the clerk said as she cashed Jess out. "She's a very lucky bride. It's a beautiful ring. It has always been one of my favorites."

"Thanks," he replied. "But I am the lucky one."

On his drive back to Stars Hollow, Jess gathered up the courage to make a phone call he had been procrastinating about for months. He decided that since he had the ring in his pocket and had a vague idea what he was going to say when he proposed to Rory, he wanted to be proper and traditional for at least once in his life. He was going to ask for the blessing of her parents – all three of them.

He decided to tackle the lesser of three evils first, so he called Rory's father, Christopher. Their conversation was brief and to the point. Christopher was honored that Jess asked and he willingly gave his blessing, but he knew that his opinion didn't really matter. He wanted his daughter to be happy, and if Jess Mariano was the man to do that, then he had no reason to object.

He took a deep breath before dialing Lorelai's cell phone. He knew that once she answered there was no turning back.

"Good morning, Jess. Hey, did Rory get a hold of you? She thought you pulled a Houdini on her."

"Yeah, we talked. Is Luke around? I need to talk to both of you."

"He's taking Matt for a walk around the nurse's station. What's up?"

"I just want to talk to you about something."

"Is everything okay? Is Rory okay?"

"Everything's fine, Rory's fine. It's just important."

"Okay, well the suspense is killing me! Here, let me get this thing on speaker. Luke! Luke, come back! Hurry!"

"Lorelai, what's wrong? What is it?" Luke asked as he rushed in with Matt wrapped in a blue blanket. Because he was on speakerphone, Jess could hear everything, including Matthew's cute little baby gurgles.

"It's Jess. He wants to talk to us," Lorelai said, smiling what she hoped was a knowing smile. She took her son from Luke. "It sounds serious."

"It's important, not serious," Jess said quickly. "Serious makes it sound bad, and it's not bad. I think it's good, actually. It's a very, very good thing. At least I hope it is!"

"Well, then, don't keep us in suspense. What's going on? Where are you?"

"On the highway headed back to Stars Hollow."

"Headed back from where?" Luke asked. "Hey, do you have my truck? Did anything happen? Are you okay?"

"Luke, calm down. Everything's fine. I was in New York," Jess admitted. "Luke, I had to borrow your truck because I couldn't find Rory's keys this morning. I'm sorry I didn't ask first, but I didn't think you'd mind."

"Man, will you forget about the truck," Lorelai interrupted. "Jess, why did you go to New York? Rory was so freaked out earlier. What's going on?"

"I picked up an engagement ring. I want to ask Rory to marry me, but I want to be sure I have your blessings first. I know there have been some ups and downs in our relationship, mine and Rory's and mine with the two of you. I know that I've let you down in the past, but I promise you that I've changed. I have worked hard to prove to Rory that I'm in this thing for the long haul and I will work forever to make sure that she, and you, knows how much I love her. I love your daughter, Lorelai, and I want her to be my wife."

"I am so honored that you are asking for my blessing, but you don't need to, Jess," Lorelai said. "You have earned it. I don't want to go back in time, but you have definitely grown into a wonderful man who obviously loves my daughter and will do everything that it takes to make her happy and provide her with a wonderful life. I can't imagine her being with anyone else and I have never known her this happy."

"It sure took you long enough," Luke said, smirking at Lorelai, who winked back in silent response.

"Look who's talking," Jess retorted.

"So, when are you going to ask her?" Lorelai asked, ignoring Jess and Luke. "How long do I have to keep this to myself? It'll drive me crazy keeping a secret like this!"

"Just until tonight and I am sure Rory will call you. Thank you," he said quickly. "Thank you both so much. God, I hope she says yes," Jess mumbled, hanging up the phone.

Luke clicked the cell phone off speakerphone and ended the call. "Remember what happened the last time a guy proposed to Rory? What will happen if she doesn't say yes? Jess will be devastated. We'll all be devastated."

"Stop worrying. You cannot even attempt to compare Logan to Jess asking Rory to marry him. Rory never really loved Logan. There is no comparison. Jess is the one. I fought it for years, but he's always been the one for Rory. The timing for them is right now. It just took them both a little while to grow up and to realize what was right in front of them. I know you see it, too. It's just like it was with you and me. Trust me, Luke. A mother knows."