New chapter!

That Conversation:

Two weeks ago, Britney Braun and I had a conversation where she vaguely lamented that she had a major issue in her life she couldn't escape. Two weeks ago, she told me that I was ranked third on her list of hatred. A day after that conversation, Britney Braun stopped showing up to school. I became aware of her absence a week in when Merida asked me if I heard the rumours about her being dead (which just started to spread at that point in time). I didn't think much of them until a week after when our classmates and some of my friends have reported having not heard from Britney since her first absence, further increasing their belief in her death.

Today, I show up to school early because my phone has been blowing up due to this rumour. I stride right into the cafeteria and see Merida and Angela sitting at a table. I make my way over to them, sitting beside Merida while Angela is across from us.

"You're early!" Angela exclaims.

"And you know why," I huff out. "What the hell is going on with this Britney rumour?"

"It's getting believable, that's what," Merida responds. She raises a brow indicating for me to listen around. I glance over and hear that neighbouring groups of our classmates and other high schoolers are also talking about it.

"Jesus…" I mutter. Was there nothing more interesting or less sadistic to talk about? "Where's Xavier?"

"He skipped the day," Angela responds.

I nod. Since Angela and Xavier got blessed with a perfect immune system and never get sick, their parents allow them to have three days of the school year where they could just take off, granted that they're not skipping tests or anything important like that. I completely understand why Xavier would take this day: he was head-over-heels for Britney (for some reason I still don't know) and now that there's this lingering rumour, why would he want to listen to it repeatedly?

"Too many people were messaging him about it and he couldn't take it so he just went back to bed," Angela whispers to us.

"Why the fuck are they even asking him?" Merida questions. She stands up on her cafeteria chair and clears her throat to make an announcement to everyone in the room. "Xavier and Britney were not together! Stop talking to him about it, he doesn't know shit!"

Everyone stares at her as she sits back down and they resume their conversation, probably still about Xavier or now about Xavier and Britney. Apollo and Daniel just so happened to show up right when Merida said that. Even if Merida didn't broadcast that statement, they would know what the ambiance of the room is like. As I look at them, I see that Daniel is pretty chill about this whole situation (probably because it's been two weeks) and Apollo is already sitting next to me eating some breakfast burritos.

"Our locker area is infested," Daniel tells Merida.

"Hence why I'm not there," Merida responds, "and I will never be there again."

Our lockers are ordered alphabetically so Daniel Banner and Merida Barton have their lockers nearby each other. Britney Braun's is close to theirs and I could only assume that people are going there to pay their respects to the possibly dead. Sometimes, our classmates are fucked up.

"Where's Xavier?" Apollo asks.

"Home," Angela responds.

Apollo nods, continuing to eat. I eye him.

"How are you taking all this?" I ask him. "You and Britney didn't like each other either."

"Do not talk to me," he responds, "I am busy eating."

"Stress-eating?"

"Yes, now let me be."

I leave him and his breakfast burritos alone, giving them the precious moments they need for some reason.

"I always knew there as something off about Britney," Merida says.

"No, you didn't," Angela responds. "You're just saying that now."

Merida nods. "I am, but hear me out: despite our personal thoughts on Britney, we can all agree that she was perfect. Perfection is treacherous territory because the moment you spot the tiniest flaw, it's ruined. Britney had that natural gift of making people admire her, whether it was to like her or hate her. It's a handy skill, I must admit, because if we were too busy noticing how fun she was or how hot she was or how bitchy she was, then we wouldn't have time to notice that there were some things a little off about her."

"Off like what?" Daniel asks. Admittedly, even I'm intrigued by where this conversation could be going. I personally knew there were things peculiar about Britney, but I just didn't like her.

"None of us have been to her house or we don't know where she lives, not even the area. But none of that matters when you're swinging pom poms and smooching Xavier, does it?"

I say nothing because as I think that over, she has a point. We've known Britney for three years ever since she joined our school in the eighth grade. I was never close to her, but even Angela and Xavier had no clue where she lived. If I were to conclude anything about Britney's house, I could just say New York and, even then, it would be a doubtful assumption.

"Are you blaming Xavier for Britney's disappearance or death?!" Angela exclaims.

Merida shushes her when surrounding people start eavesdropping. She whispers, "Disappearance, not so much. Death, definitely not."

"He has nothing to do with it!" Angela whispers this time.

"As if Xavier would tell you," Merida scoffs.

"We've shared a womb. There are no secrets after that."

"Look, I'm not directly blaming him but he isn't here. Maybe Britney was getting too close with him and she didn't want him to see the skeletons in her closet so she fled!"

"Like hell Xavier has anything to do with that!"

"Okay!" I yell with a single clap just to get those two to calm down before Angela leaps across the table to beat up Merida for indirectly blaming Xavier. "Look, relationships aren't just about physicality. There are ways to show you care about people not just using your lips."

Merida rolls her eyes and I ignore that.

"Stark's right," Apollo says. I'm a little surprised that, out of everyone sitting here, he agrees with me but I'm not complaining. Apollo clears his throat. "Look, I want to have something perfect to say to match Britney's supposed perfection, but all I can really think about, at the moment, is how hungry I am, so hear me out before I starve to death: Xavier stayed home. He has three hooky days of the year and this is his second one in the span of the two weeks. His first one just so happened to be the day Britney stopped showing up to school which, honestly, is just a coincidence because when people asked him the next day, he had no clue she was gone. That was no act because we would know if he was lying since he's horrible at it. Anyways, Xavier took today because he loves her, whatever that word means. He thinks that his life is better with her. He thinks he's a better person with her. He needs her."

We're all quiet. Who would've thought that a starving Apollo could break this all down? Is there something in the breakfast burritos?

"That's exactly what love is," Daniel states.

Apollo shrugs, returning to his breakfast burritos. I'm surprised that he was even listening to our conversation considering how focused he is on his food.

"Can we go back to Britney possibly living a double life?" Angela asks. I bet she doesn't want to talk about Xavier anymore. "That's better than the dead rumour."

Apollo suddenly chokes on his food and we all ignore him. He'll be fine.

"Sure," I state. "So, Britney has this popular, bitchy, cheerleader-who-likes-Xavier façade versus something else that she's probably visiting."

Angela shrugs. "Probably. I mean, what is it like to be someone you aren't?"

Daniel takes a long exhale. "You may think that it's liberating, enlightening to see the world through different eyes and get a fresh perspective on your surroundings but that's not true. It's a beautiful lie. It's actually terrifying. You're scared of who or what you've become and then you have to live with how the world sees you based on what face you have. Because once you've broken that glass barrier of perfection, then you could never fix it the way it was before since you've already been exposed."

Everyone is speechless because we know that he's talking about him and his Hulk. He's only transformed once and he was around ten-years-old. We don't know much of the story other than not to talk about it. To our surprise, Apollo gets up and leaves in a hurry. We kind of just let him be because, well, we're not so sure.

"Well, okay then…" Merida mutters.

"Look, the point is," Daniel starts, sitting up straight, "until something with Britney is confirmed by someone we can trust, there's no point in making a big deal out of it."

"Tell them that," Merida says, gesturing to everyone else in the cafeteria.

"It's only going to get worse," Angela says.

"Worse than dead?" I question.

Daniel scoffs a little with a tiny grin on his face. "What I love about science is that as you learn, you never really get answers. You just get better questions."

-o-

After school, I walk through the parking lot and see Daniel's car. I notice that he's just sitting there so I make my way around and get in through the passenger door. He watches me as I close the door behind me and take a seat. I can tell just by his slightly saddened expression that he spent the entire day thinking about what he said in the cafeteria.

"Are you okay?" I ask him.

"Yeah, I just…" He mutters. "Yeah."

I know he's not but I also know he doesn't want to talk about it, so I might as well change the subject.

"Look," I start, shifting my position so that I'm facing him. "I know you and the guys have some sort of closer bond with each other like the girls and I have, so how are you guys taking the whole Britney thing, really? I mean, minus Xavier. You seemed pretty lax and Apollo is, I don't know, starving?"

Daniel takes a breath. "I'm honestly overwhelmed."

"By what?"

"Britney was away for a few days and now everyone thinks she's dead."

"Two weeks is not a few days. Typically, I wouldn't believe such a thing because it's a stupid rumour but look at how fast it spread combined with the evidence people have. I mean, nobody's confirming or denying it! And Xavier seems to believe it for those reasons so now I feel bad. We have to talk to him about this if he's up to it."

"Why do you feel bad?"

I take a breath. "Britney and I spoke to each other the day before she disappeared. She did seem off because she wasn't sniping at me. Anyways, I don't remember that conversation word for word, but something happened in her life that she feels as if she can't escape no matter how much she really wants to. What makes it worse is that she said that she doesn't hate me the most and said that I don't have to worry about running into her again."

Daniel is completely stunned into silence and my body starts to shake the more I think that over. Oh my god, it really sounds like she committed suicide or is just dead. Suddenly, Daniel hugs me which calms me down. I really need that right now.

"I can assure you that Britney is fine," Daniel says.

"How can you be so sure?" I ask.

"You're thinking too much into this which is fine because someone who overthinks is someone who overloves, which is fascinating considering that you hate Britney."

I laugh a little. "Stop, I'm serious. How can you be so sure?"

"Because I can relate to her on that double life perspective and I'm completely fine."

No, you're not.

I part from the hug and pull him into a kiss. I know that he needs this: a small reminder to tell him that he hasn't and never will lose me or any of us. And when our lips meet, nothing else matters. The feeling of his arms wrapped around me always drives me crazy. I slowly ease out of his embrace, giving him one last reassuring glance that nothing about his Hulk will ever change anything.

"You know you can talk to me," I tell him.

"I know," He says, smiling a little. "As you said: there are ways to show you care about people not just using your lips."

I narrow my eyes at him as he laughs.

I fucking love this chapter.

The conversation with Britney that Emily's referring to at the end is chapter 15.