Chapter 25
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Gabriel was leading us to his church. Rick asked him if he was the one who was watching us earlier in the woods. But he wasn't him. Because mostly he kept to himself. That guy reeked with cowardice. Maybe I'm keen to judge him but keeping to yourself into a church? That's not surviving. That's just cowardice. But again, maybe I'm being unfair.
"Nowadays, people are just as dangerous as the dead, don't you think?" Gabriel questioned.
"No, people are worse." Daryl told him.
"Well, I wasn't watching you." Gabriel told us. "I haven't been beyond the stream near my church more than a few times since it all started. That was the furthest I've gone before today." I exchanged a quick glance with Daryl. "Or maybe I'm lying. Maybe I'm lying about everything and there's no church ahead at all. Maybe I'm leading you into a trap so I can steal all your squirrels."
"Careful, Father. People died for less than that." Merle warned him.
"Far less than that." I added.
"Members of my flock had often told me that my sense of humor leaves much to be desired." Gabriel apologized.
"Yeah, it does." Daryl confirmed it.
St. Sarah's Church Episcopal. It was small and white. Rick took a small group in with him to check that there were no one inside that Gabriel didn't tell us about. When Rick made sure that the Church was clear of any presence other than Gabriel's. We got in.
"Going out with Carol." Daryl informed me. "Get some water."
"Alright, be careful out there." I leaned in and pecked his lips.
"Stay tight." Daryl told me before following Carol outside.
"How'd you survive here for so long?" I heard Rick asked Gabriel but their conversation was already lost to my ears.
I put the squirrels and my new bow away, took off my hoodie and threw it on the bench. It was starting to get hot out there. Or maybe it was just me. Without even thinking about it, I passed my hand on my small bump. It wasn't even a bump yet. It was slightly rounded but not that much. Maybe a seven or eight week's belly. Anyway, I sat down on the bench as Sacha suggested to Rick to leave Tyreese behind to help and keep Judith safe.
"Hey." Sophia said sitting down next to me.
"Hey." I smiled at her.
"Merle has gone with Abraham and his group to fix the short bus." She told me.
"Thanks." I retorted. I ran my hand through her hair. "Want me to braid them for you?" She nodded eagerly with a big grin.
"I missed it." She said shifting so her back was to me. Rick stopped to our level.
"I'm taking Gabriel with us." Rick informed me. "Glenn, Maggie and Tara are going to check the gun store. You'll be okay?"
"Yeah, we will." I assured him. "You can go." He nodded before following the others out. "So, I don't have a proper brush or comb. So, it's not gonna be really good." I warned her.
"It's alright. It'll be good enough." I used my fingers to comb her hair. "Are you and Daryl gonna get married like Glenn and Maggie?" Sophia spoke again.
Carl let out a snort. "Meredith? Married? I don't think so."
"That snort was quite offensive." I raised my eyebrows looking at Carl. "And why do you think that?"
"Well, I don't think Daryl is the kind of guy who will get married." Carl argued sitting down. "And you aren't exactly the type."
"Says who?" I snorted.
"That's why they should get married." Sophia told him. "They fit together. Plus, they're gonna have a baby."
"Stop talking like I wasn't right there with you." I exclaimed tugging on Sophia's hair.
"Ouch!" Sophia cried.
"Sorry." I apologized quickly laughing lightly.
Sophia and Carl disappeared together. I didn't give much thought to what Sophia said. I was like Carl, I found the idea absurd. Getting married? Pfff! It's not that I wouldn't love to but I'm good with the way things are between us. I don't need for them to change. I don't want them to change. But they've changed already, haven't they?
My experience in Terminus was still fresh in my mind. I thought I wasn't affected by it, you know. Merely thinking of it as a bad experience. Nothing more. But it was more than that. I knew it the moment I didn't put a fight with Daryl or Rick to go with them. I knew it the moment I agreed easily to stay tight, safe at the church.
It was an irrational fear. I viewed it like that at the time. You know with Terminus going down and my former bitch of a friend most likely dead, I thought it was irrational. Adding to this irrational fear, there was that weird feeling that someone was watching us. We were finally able to catch a breath but we were still on edge. I was still on edge.
I jumped in the air when I felt something touched my shoulder. "Hey. Hey. It's me." Daryl's roughed voice reached my ears. "It's just me."
"Sorry." I said relieved, my hand on my chest. "I thought…" I trailed off not knowing what I was thinking. "Never mind."
"You alright?" Daryl asked frowning at me his hands on my elbow.
"Yeah. Yeah. I'm fine." I nodded quickly. "So, you've been back for a long time?"
"Nope, just arrived with Carol." Daryl replied. "Tyreese said you were back there."
"Yeah. I needed to take a breather." My arms was around his neck and I was playing with the hair at the back of his neck. "Got lost in thought, I guess."
"What were you thinking about?" Daryl questioned me as his arms slowly went around my waist.
I exhaled deeply. "Nothing worth talking about." I grabbed the collar of his shirt, pulled him to me and locked lips with him. "Have I already told you that I've missed you?" I smiled pulling away.
Daryl swept my hair away from my face. "Don't hurt to hear it again." He pecked my forehead quickly. "Come on, Rick brought back the food while ago."
There was a lot of food but not only. They have brought back some clothes with them. So, everyone got a new set of clothes. I was glad to get out of my filthy clothes. It was like heaven. I opted for a large red flannel shirt, a black tank top and dark jeans. I didn't get to have a proper bath or shower but it was always welcomed to get to clean up a bit.
That evening we had a feast. It was a little bit more than just catching our breath. It was like we were celebrating our reunion, our surviving Terminus. I mean there was even wine for dinner. Except for me and the kids. Because you know, I'm pregnant and Daryl forbid me. One sip is not gonna kill little bug. I know alcohol is bad when you're pregnant. But really? Really? How dangerous wine can be when there's walkers out there? Seriously!
"I'd like to propose a toast." Abraham started. "I look around this room and I see survivors. Each and every one of you has earned that title." He raised up his glass. "To the survivors."
"Survivors! Cheers!" We've all toasted. Yeah, even me with my water.
"Is that all you want to be?" Abraham asked. I looked up to him. "Wake up in the morning, fight the undead pricks, forage for food, go to sleep at night with two eyes open, rinse and repeat?" He knew the answer to that question already. No one here wanted that. "'Cause you can do that. I mean you got strength. You got the skill. Thing is, for you people, for what you can do, that's just surrender. Now, we get Eugene to Washington and he will make the dead die and the living will have this world again. And that is not a bad takeaway for a little road trip." I looked over at Sasha briefly raising a small smile. "Eugene, what's in DC?"
"Infrastructure constructed to withstand pandemics even of this fubar magnitude." Eugene replied. "That means food, fuel, refuge. Restart."
I'll be plain honest with you, here. I didn't believe in this. I wanted to believe that Eugene has a cure. I wanted to believe that we'll send the end of this. Really, I did. But can you blame me for being skeptical? After all these promised refugee camp that turned out to be a lie. I'll believe it when I'll see it. And yet, I hoped for it.
"Save for that little one. For the baby that's coming." Abraham continued. I looked at Daryl who returned my gaze. "Save it for yourselves. Save it for the people out there who don't get nothing left to do except survive." Silence fell.
I knew what I wanted to do. I knew what most of us wanted to do. Even though, I don't truly believe in this promise, I wanted to go to DC. Yes, it might not work. Yes, it might not have a shelter for us there. But does it really matter? We have nothing to lose at trying. And we might found something there that we don't have here. A new home, maybe. Now, whatever Rick says, it goes. If he says we'll go, we'll go. If not, we'll stay in Atlanta.
And Rick said it for all of us. We were in. We were going to DC. We would go to DC. And hopefully, we'll get a better life there.
The mood was light. I didn't remember a time where things were just about having fun. Laughing, talking, and drinking. It wasn't just about surviving. Actually, it wasn't about surviving at all, tonight. It was almost as if tonight was a small impromptu in this cruel world. A welcomed one. Getting to know the new people of our group better. Joking around with Michonne and Maggie, like I used to at the prison.
I couldn't help but have a small thought for Hershel and Mary. I wished they could be here with us. It would have been better with them here with us. I missed them.
So much for catching a breath? Bob was the first to disappear. After Sasha went to look for him before Rick could stop her. We realized that there's two more people missing. Carol and Daryl. I feared the worst then. I grabbed my bow and was about to get out look for him. Rick stopped me, though. Ordering me to wait here. Merle went with him and Tyreese.
They most likely have been taken by the ones who were watching us. I didn't know who those people were but they better run before we got to them. I'm not one to brag but we survived Woodbury, the prison and Terminus. So we can deal with them too. They don't know what's heading their way. Biting my nails, I paced up and down in the front row. I was anxiously waiting for Rick, Tyreese, Merle and Sasha to come back. Hoping they got some good news for us.
The door of the church opened and Sasha got in first, followed by Rick, Merle and Tyreese. She walked up to Gabriel immediately. "Stop." She told him. "What are you doing?" I looked over at Merle and he just shook his head no. "What are you doing?" Sasha asked again. "This is all connected. You show up, we're being watched, and now three of us are gone."
I walked over to her. I didn't blame her. She had the right to be suspicious of him and in a way it was all true. It might just be a coincidence but really, we didn't believe in coincidence anymore.
"I don't have anything to do with this." Gabriel defended himself.
Sasha pulled out her knife. "Sasha, don't!" Michonne pulled me back.
"Who's out there?" Sasha asked him.
"I don't have anything to do with this." Gabriel repeated.
"Where are our people?"
"I don't have anything to…"
"Where are our people?!" Sasha yelled this time.
"Please, I don't have anything to do with this."
Rick pulled Sasha behind him. "Why'd you bring us here?" Gabriel stammered at Rick's question. "You working with someone?"
"I'm alone. I'm alone." Gabriel raised his hands up. "I was always alone."
"What about the woman in the food bank, Gabriel?" Rick asked him. "What did you do to her? 'You'll burn for this.' That was for you. Why? What are you gonna burn for, Gabriel? What? What did you do?" Rick violently grabbed Gabriel's collar. "What did you do?!"
"I lock the doors at night." Gabriel answered on the verge of tears. "I always lock the doors at night. I always lock the doors at night."
"You left them people to die out there, uh?" Merle commented lowly.
"They started coming, my congregation." Gabriel retorted. "Atlanta was bombed the night before and they were scared. They were—they were looking for a safe place, a place where they felt safe. And it was so early. It was so early. And the doors were still locked. You see, it was my choice. There were so many of them and they were trying to pry the shutters and banging on the sidings, screaming at me. And so the dead came for them." We all kept quiet while he was telling his story. "Women, children. Entire families calling my name as they were torn apart, begging me for mercy. Begging for mercy. Damning me to hell. I buried their bones. I buried it all. The Lord sent you here to finally punish me."
"The Lord has nothing to do with this, Father." Merle told him. "It was a nice story but that's not telling us where our people are."
I turned my head sharply towards the door when I heard someone whistled outside. Glenn went to the window. "There's something…" He started. "There's someone outside lying in the grass." My heartbeat went faster at Glenn's words.
"Sasha. Meredith." Rick called after us as we both rushed up to the doors.
It was Bob. Not Daryl. Sasha rushed up to him and I followed her. One of his legs was missing. Glenn ordered us to get him inside while they took care of the walkers that was starting to surround us. I helped Sasha to take Bob inside the church. A gunshot echoed before Rick urged us to get inside. Sasha and I carried Bob inside.
We weren't finished with the Terminus gang. It was Gareth and his people who did this to Bob. It was them who ate his leg right in front of him. Gareth and Emilie were back to haunt me. Yes, Emilie has survived the walkers. And even with her bad knee, she was one of those people who has hurt Bob.
Bob informed us that Daryl and Carol weren't with them. They'd drove off in a car. I don't know where. I don't know why. No one does. But at least they were safe away from those people. There was one more thing. Bob could have survived with his one leg and we would have helped him through it. Like we did for Hershel. But Bob has been bitten and there was nothing we could have done to change that.
We've been reunited for only two days and already we had to part ways with one of our friends. It just seemed unfair. It was unfair and painful. Gabriel gently offered us to put Bob in his office. There he had a sofa. A comfortable place for Bob to be, to lie down.
"Time for a reality check." Abraham said loudly. "We all need to leave for DC right now."
"We aren't leaving without Daryl or Carol." I retorted.
"I respect that, but there's a clear threat here to Eugene." Abraham continued. "I need to extract his ass before things get any uglier. So if y'all won't come, good luck to you. We'll go our separate ways."
"You leaving on foot?" Rick asked and my eyes fell shut. This is not gonna end well.
"We fixed that damn bus ourselves." Abraham stopped and turned around to face Rick.
"There are a lot more of us." Rick countered walking up to him.
"You want to keep it that way? You should come." Abraham said back.
"Carol saved your life. We saved your life." Rick got his face.
"Well, I'm trying to save yours." Abraham shouted back. "Save everyone's."
"We aren't going anywhere without our people." Rick repeated.
"Your people took off."
"They're coming back."
"To what, picked over bones?!" Abraham shouted again.
"You're not taking…"
"Do not lay hands!"
"Hey! Hey! Hey!" I said pushing Rick behind me while Glenn pushed Abraham behind him. Putting distance between the two men by doing so.
"You really want to do this now. Really?" I asked both of them. "You want to leave, I get that. You want to go to DC and save the world. But we need your help to stop those guys. Alright?" I reasoned with Abraham. "Just tonight. And then you can leave. What do you say?"
"I have an idea." Tara intervened. "If you stay just one more day and help, I'll go with you to DC." She turned to Rick. "Okay?"
"Glenn and Maggie, too." Abraham said.
"What?" I exclaimed.
"No." Rick told him.
"Good luck, then." Abraham retorted. "I'm not interested in breaking up what you have here."
Abraham ordered to Rosita and Eugene to get their things. Eugene refused at first but eventually gave in.
"You're not taking the bus." Rick insisted.
"Rick, please, don't do this." I begged him.
"He's not taking the bus."
"Try to stop me." Abraham challenged him. Rick glared at him and started to walk up to him before Glenn put himself between them.
"You stay—you stay and help us, and we will go with you." Glenn promised him referring to him and Maggie.
"Glenn."
"It's not your call." Glenn told me. "You stay, help us."
"Half a day." Abraham agreed. "Come high noon, we're taillights. I'm not waiting the other damn shoe to drop."
"And we will leave with you." Maggie promised in her turn.
"12 hours. Then we go." Abraham finished.
"I'm coming with you." I told to Rick after I pulled him away.
"Meredith…" Rick sighed.
"Let me fix this." I cut him off before he could continue. "I didn't kill her. I should have and I didn't. So, let me fix this."
"You're pregnant." Rick countered. "Have you forgotten that? You could lose the baby. I'm not gonna risk that."
"I'm not disabled. I still can shoot. I can handle a riffle." I hissed back at him.
"What about Daryl, uh?" Rick argued.
"He's not there, now is he?" I replied yelling a bit. "I'm coming because I owe it to Bob and Sasha. I'm coming because I need to finish this and you can't stop me." We stared at each other for a full minute. "Rick, just let me come with you."
"I'm sorry. I can't." Rick shook his head. "I can't let you come with us."
"Gareth and his girlfriend threatened to take my baby away from me." I said through clenched teeth. "I have to make sure they won't. I have to."
Rick grabbed my shoulders. "And they won't." Rick said. "Meredith, they won't. I'll make sure of this. Now, I need you here with Carl and Judith. Sophia. I need you to look out for them. I need you to stay safe. Daryl needs you to stay safe." I nodded knowing well I won't won this fight.
Rick then proceeded to explain his plan to the rest of the group while I helped Michonne to load the weapons. At one point Sasha came in and told them that she wanted to go with them. Tyreese tried to dissuade her, telling her that she needed to be with Bob but Sasha wanted to go and there was no winning for Tyreese.
I knew where I needed to be. In the Father's office, with the kids and Gabriel. Rick handed me a riffle. His eyes holding the promise he just made to me. That he won't let Gareth or Emilie to get to them, to us or to the baby. The group set off into the woods to find the Terminus gang while the rest of us moved into the office. Tyreese, Rosita and Eugene remained behind with us.
Only a few minutes after the group left, we heard the entrance door of the church opened. Carl and I aimed our weapons to the door of the office. Getting ready to welcome Gareth, Emilie and the rest of their group.
"Well, I guess you know we're here." Gareth's voice echoed through the church. "And we know you're here. And we're armed."
"So are we." I whispered under my breath.
"So there's really no point in hiding anymore." Gareth continued. "We've been watching you. We know who's here. There's Bob, unless you've put him out of his misery already. And Eugene. Rosita. Martin's good friends Tyreese and Sophia. Carl. Judith."
"And don't forget my sweet friend, honey." I heard Emilie said. "Meredith." She sing-sang. "Your baby daddy is not here. Oh, yes, I've seen him. I have to say, he's not that bad looking. He has that rough-around-the-edges kind a look." She emitted a low chuckle. "Anyway, there's no one here to protect you. We've seen them left the church."
"With all of your weapons." They really have found each other. Those two pieces of shit, brainless, morons. "Listen, we don't know where you all are, but this isn't a big place. So, let's just stop this now before things get more painful than they need to be." Gareth continued tauntingly.
Someone tried to open the door. Carl and I took a step back while Sophia stood near us raising her gun at the door.
"Look, you're behind one of these two doors and we have more than enough firepower to take down both." Gareth warned us. I swallowed the lump in my throat. "Can't imagine that's what you all want." Someone armed their weapons.
"Let's take a vote. Shall we?" Emilie took over. "What do you think, Father? Are those people worth risking your life?" I looked over at Gabriel. "Help us, Father and you can leave. You and the baby. What do you think?"
It was silent for antagonizing moment. Until the moment Judith cried. My eyes fell shut. Carl rushed to his sister in order to calm her down. But it was too late. They knew where we were now.
"Maybe we'll adopt this little baby girl instead of yours, Merry." Emilie said and I could hear the smirk she must be wearing in her voice.
"It's your last chance right now to tell us you're coming out." Gareth called out on the other side of the door.
There were two thuds and then we could hear Rick's voice. "Put your guns on the floor."
"Rick, we'll fire right into that office. So you lower your gun…" Gareth started before yelling in pain.
I opened the door of the office and joined the others in the church.
"Put your guns on the floor and kneel." Rick ordered them one more time.
"Well, if you still can." I added for Emilie's benefits aiming my rifle at her.
"Do what he says." Gareth ordered to his men in pain. They all knelt down, even Emilie, except for one man. "Martin, there's no choice here."
"Yeah, there is." Martin replied.
"Want to bet?" Abraham came up on the side aiming his rifle at his head.
Martin finally dropped down his weapon and knelt on the floor. I walked over to Emilie and stood in front of her, like Rick stood in front of Gareth. "No point in begging, right?" Gareth stated.
"No." Rick replied.
"Still, you could have killed us when you came in." He continued. "There had to be a reason for that."
"We didn't want to waste the bullets." Rick retorted.
"We used to help people." Gareth started. "We saved people. Things changed. They came in…"
"Yeah, yeah, spare us your life story." I said harshly. "Told you, you screwed with the wrong people, didn't I?"
"You think you're funny, don't you?" Emilie spat. "You have no idea what it is to be hungry. No idea."
"You don't have to do this." Gareth tried to reason with us. "We can walk away. And we will never cross paths again. I promise you."
"But you'll cross someone's path." Rick said back. "You'd do this to anyone, right? Besides, I already made you a promise." Rick said unsheathing his machete.
I unsheathed my knife as Gareth screamed. I dived my knife in Emilie's skull. Several times, until her head was covered in blood, until she was unrecognizable. Until she was nothing. My hand was only driven by rage, anger and fear. It was them or us. And we'd rather it be us. If Dale could see us or even Hershel, they'd both thought that we had lost our humanity and they'd probably be right. That's what this world turned us into: monsters. But this is how we survive. Because after all you either kill or be killed.