Hey guys so sorry for the unexpected hiatus, trust me when I say that February is one of my busiest months out of the year. Anyway, I am back and I'll be finishing up as much as I can before… You know, college and I start working on becoming an actual author… Anyway here is your chapter it's more like a segway into the next chapter but that's okay.
Annabeth
"We'd been trying to touch the sky from the bottom of the ocean."
I didn't mean to scream, it just hurt so badly.
Cutting myself hurt so much and did so little.
I didn't mean to scream, I don't know why I did it.
I know why I tried so hard to end it all.
I know that…
But why I screamed, I don't know.
I remember saying goodbye, as I slit my wrists open and felt the blood pool out of my skin.
I said each name that I could think to apologize to as my consciousness left me.
I thought I was dead, I thought it was all over, I thought, finally I'm done fighting.
But then I woke up.
I willed myself to die and it wasn't enough.
Who'd have thought it?
Dying seemed so easy, and yet I managed to fuck that up too.
They made doctors look at me.
Told me I was depressed as if I was the one who didn't know that.
But then they left me alone.
They made me talk to Piper.
She pretended we were having a sleepover.
She told me about nice things.
But that couldn't last.
Percy came in and tried to tell me we'd fix me.
I would have believed him, if my parents hadn't intervened.
They told me that they would fix me.
And after having been in this hospital for a week, I know now that I don't want them to fix me.
I don't want my parents to fix me.
I don't want Percy or Piper.
I don't want them to put me back together again.
That's my job.
I want to fix myself.
Almost two weeks ago, Piper told me something.
She said, Now that you're dead, what are you going to do with the rest of your life?
And I wondered for far too long what she meant.
She was telling me that I had killed myself.
That I succeeded.
That I no longer had to be dead.
I can be alive, and now I get to decide what to do with the rest of my life.
And my first step, to getting better.
Is healing myself.
I don't know how I'm going to get there.
But now I have something I used to never have before.
Determination.
I want this.
I want to get better.
And so, I will.