THIS IS NOT THE END
Anyway, thanks for all the reviews and PMs and everything, guys! It's all really greatly appreciated and I hope you enjoy your new 5-page chapter! I just had to make up for my absence! Hope you enjoy! There's some French in this, so here are the translations in order of when they're spoken:
L was divine justice, you can never hope to be him.
A wretch such as you, L could never love. You make us ill.
You are not welcome here.
Your guilt, your regret and tears cannot bring the dead back alive, Light, your pain means nothing to me. Sorry is not good enough.
Time had so quickly evaporated through Raito's hands. He glared to the young ebony-haired boy that sat on his new bed, reading. Raito scowled to the boy, wishing he could reach out and touch him. Reach his voice out to L, extend his words to him and ask him if he's okay. Raito's red eyes shined in interest as the young boy Raito grew to know as Mello wandered in.
As Mello's dark eyes lowered in shy care Raito finally noticed the black suit L was wearing. Mello looked up to his hero and asked softly, "Are you okay?"
L looked from his book to Mello, Mello looked up to him finally and flustered somewhat at the intense gaze L was planting on his figure. L did not reply, but rose. He walked towards Mello and took the darkly dressed boy into a light embrace. Mello held back to L tightly, though surprised by L's tender actions.
The young L looked to Mello, with his hands planted firmly on the other boy's shoulders, finally replying, "Thank you for caring about me, Mello. It means much more to me than I will ever expect you to understand."
Raito looked to Ryuk and asked simply, "What's happened?"
Ryuk chuckled, but when Raito looked back he found himself back in the blue, abandoned room he had first entered. He looked to Ryuk, mesmerized and ventured, "Why could I see him? Why couldn't he see me?"
"You could see him because I say that you can. And he can't see you because you're not there."
Raito did not waste energy on shooting the shinigami a dirty look and rather sat down on L's bed silently. As he sat, particles highlighted by the white light from outside the window flew up into the air. He ran his hand against the worn, pathetic blanket that once covered the now deceased L. His breath shown fogged against the cold air of the room.
The room itself reminded Raito of L; blank, untainted by a normal teenaged boy's perverse posters or awful choices in musical bands. It was seemingly never used and you could never imagine one laughing within it. Against the cold winter air, brushing against the dirtied blankets with dry, unused flesh marked with ink stains.
You could never imagine more than one bed in this room, as was the impression Raito received from L; that he could never imagine L with anyone else. L was closed off from the world, like this room. The third floor, all the way down the hall, locked away by winter's harsh winds. It was nearly empty, but that was almost invalid. L only seemed empty; he appeared uncaring, heartless, harsh and cold. That, though, was only one side of L.
There was a summer side to L too. There was that side where he laughed hysterically and wished to only see the world in all of its beauty. That side wished to walk about in Italy, gazing at flowers and eating only candies and cakes like a defiant child. That side was not this room. The notebook that was L overflowed with empty papers, but sometimes there could be found a doodle or a note jotted down here and there.
When you found one of those wonderful pages, they illustrated wonderful stories of justice, or elusive signs of care or secret desires. That was summer and spring in L. When his heart was opened to a new sheet of paper that was to be written on by L's poor improvisation of life Raito could see this room differently. He could see this room filled with the sun's blazing gold insignia, he could imagine L smiling, laughing and spreading his curtains widely to welcome the waves of warmth from outside his window.
Raito opened his eyes again and stood. He walked from his dusted seat on L's former bed to walk down the creaking, decrepit staircase. When he reached the threshold welcoming him to the second floor he turned to Ryuk whom had been floating behind him the entire time to ask,
"Is there anything else I should see?"
Ryuk smiled and uttered, "All in good time, Light."
Raito would not take that, though; he was far too impatient for 'good time' to whirl its ugly head around. He wanted to know everything about L and he wanted it all now. Or was Ryuk's feeble attempt to keep Raito in suspense some sign of care from the demon? It wasn't like Ryuk to put much effort into anything, so why now? Why would he keep things from Raito?
The only answer that made sense to him was the thought that, perhaps Ryuk cared about Raito and his closed of emotions enough to try and protect them. Protect him from what, though?
"Why was L dressed so formally?"
Ryuk looked to Raito with a blank expression nearly stolen from L and Watari before replying,
"He had gone to a funeral."
Raito glared, unbelieving to the fact that he had to ask,
"Who's?"
Ryuk chuckled rather than replied to Raito's inquest and decided to float away muttering inaudible whispers. Raito glared ever longer, his maroon eyes darkening; blanketed by the surrounding shadows of the rotted staircase and darkened hallway. He growled softly, finally deciding that he must get Ryuk to spill his secrets and begrudgingly followed the shinigami down halls and stairs until they reached the two, polished wooden doors of Watari's former Master Bedroom.
Ryuk smiled to Raito sinisterly as Raito gripped the two golden handles on the door and pulled them open. He looked around; dark red carpeting, a king-size bed with bedding puffy and smooth. There were two long windows stretching from the ceiling to the floor, a large gap of wall between them and they were both blanketed by thin, red curtains. There were two closets a few feet off from the foot of his bed, where sat a trunk.
Raito glared to Ryuk again, announcing, "It looks the same as always…what is it?"
Ryuk looked to Raito with the same intensity and rage in his gumball eyes, but he suddenly broke into a small chuckle. Raito was not a fool, so when he was made to look a fool he was immensely angered; now what could that disgusting dunderhead be laughing at?
"What?!" Raito snarled
Ryuk wiped away nonexistent tears before sighing and replying, "I just can't take you seriously like that…"
Raito looked down on himself, spreading his arms out as if to examine for something unnatural hanging from them. When he found nothing strange he looked to Ryuk with a cocked eyebrow and objected, "What?"
Ryuk replied then, "You're dressed like L…you look ridiculous."
Raito blushed; it felt like the first time in centuries. The last time he blushed was…
"I want you to call me L again."
Raito's lowered eyes traveled to Ryuk's again as he stated softly, "I just want to see L again."
Ryuk was not surprised, though he looked it. He had truly known all along, after all, Misa could not cause Raito any emotional tremors or lack of rational thought, or cause him sleepless, pitiful nights of crying. Raito was a bright young man; a genius and his mind was a labyrinth, twisting with theories, histories and many more questions than any normal human could create with their pathetic minds.
Raito was truly a God among men.
"So you're willing to admit you cared about L?" Ryuk asked with a sinister smile
Raito looked away, glaring; he would not be humiliated. He ignored Ryuk and rather than answering the vexing question he repeated, "I don't see anything different from the usual in here, Ryuk…what's here?"
Ryuk just chuckled and turned his back to Raito and the room. When Raito turned back to call after the demon, Ryuk finally muttered, "All in due time, Light, all in due time."
Soon enough the streets were growing colder and darker as night approached them noisily. Guttural winds pushing through the creases of the mansion haunted his empty evening; besides a short call from Misa, fixing himself dinner and finishing the diminutive list of judging, he had gone the whole day unbothered. That is; until the moon was completely over the horizon and planting a serpentine patterned blanket of light on the house's face.
Raito was reading his novel, trying the best he could to ignore the winds pushing through the cracks in the walls, and determined to convince himself that he was not just staring at this single word on the yellowed page of this arduous book because he was uninspired to move on. He supposed it didn't mean anything anymore, no matter the book or the author; since L has been gone, every ending would be tragic, bleak, lonely and melancholic.
No matter if the prince found his princess, if the pauper became a millionaire, if the father saved his son, if the mother finally understood her daughter; every day, every page, every sentence, line and punctuation would mean emptiness to Raito, leaving him joyless, estranged and unfulfilled. When his vision dulled lazily upon the word he had been staring at the past twenty one minutes and forty two seconds there was a sudden crack and the lights went out.
He finally looked up; the lit fireplace illuminating the room crimson and gold, but this warm light could not comfort him. In his dark mindset, his body's dreary, abandoned chemicals too tired to make him rational; he couldn't find anything within him to calm the anxious beat of his heart. His sight was perplexed and fatigued in the darkness, but his other senses were at their territorial peak and he was nearly convinced he was about to have a heart attack.
He closed his heavy eyes and listened to the roaring wind outside. When he thought he was almost drifting off into sleep he heard a terrifying cry. He whipped his head around, his eyes were only welcomed to the darkness he knew was there. He squinted, to perhaps see what made that sound, for he did not want an animal in his home…
wait…am I sure it's even an animal?
As he looked into the darkness behind the cushions upon which he rested he saw something white forming; forming, enlarging, growing closer…he couldn't tell, but in a moment there was a white, frosted image only feet from him.
It was that boy; Near
Raito's eyes widened as his pupils shrank in horror and Near's image scowled to him and whimpered eerily, "L était justice divine, vous peut ne jamais espérer être lui."
The white figure than ran off; Raito rose shaking and followed after the figure out of instinct. He called after Near, his only lighting was the illumination Near provided. When Raito had followed Near to a very narrow, dark hallway on the second floor he was finally close enough and reached his arms out and gripped the figure. He was infuriated when Near became a cold rise of fog the moment his hands touched him.
Raito's blood-stained eyes looked up to see two darker figures leaning against the corner of the hall. One he immediately knew as Mello, and the other he deducted was Matt. Both had a darker aura to them than Near, and both glared to Raito as if he were a bug on the bottom of their shoes. Raito's heart skipped two beats when they opened their transparent mouths and seethed in unison; "Un wretch tel que vous, L a pu ne jamais aimer. Vous nous rendez malades."
Raito lunged for them, but just as Near the vanished like smoke the moment he neared them. His anger was near palpable, but hope was lit within him when he saw the three of them walking up the third-floor staircase a little far off. Raito immediately chased after them, growling under rushed breath that shown white against the cold air of the house. He raced after them, into L's bedroom, but once he had made it through the door he saw a light vanish out the window.
He quickly went to the creaking window, and leaned his head outside into the pouring rain and whipping winds. He spotted a small light crawl onto the roof and he instantaneously followed after; mother nature torturing his efforts, screaming to him that all of his hopes and determination to find these spirits atop his new home would prove fruitless. All the while he climbed the shingles of the elderly building he heard the voices of Near, Mello and Matt muttering in his ear words he couldn't understand; "Vous n'êtes pas bienvenu ici."
Raito finally reached the roof and looked up to see no one; no illuminating figures, or foreign whispers, there was nothing but the darkness of night, the pouring rain, pounding thunder, frightening lightening and desperate tone of his gasps. He fell to his knees on the flat, cement roof and pounded his fist into the raindrops as he began to feel a hot thump in his throat and tears forming in his eyes. He swore silently, causing him a headache as his fingers curled inwardly, the skin raking harshly against the jagged ground.
He finally rose unsteadily and twisted around quickly, only to nearly fall to his death as he looked into the onyx orbs of someone whom for so long until now, seemed to never exist. His breath and swearing got caught up in his throat as he backed away and fell onto his bottom and elbows. He looked up, wide-eyed at the floating image.
"…L…"
The image's facial expression was blank, ghostly white; his figure was glowing lightly as he looked graceful and untouchable. Raito stared in astonishment; L's clothes plastered to his shivering body, his hair planted against his face and ears. His hairs would have been standing up in fear and amazement had they not been so forcefully pushed against him. He finally broke down into hysterical tears and wept, "L…L, I've missed you…I…I didn't want to hurt you! I didn't want to kill you! Why didn't you trust my judgment? My justice? Why didn't you believe in me?"
L did nothing but looked to Raito pitifully as Raito sobbed; "You've been so gone…you've been so erased so long! I…I…I'm right, L…I-I've always been right! Why can't you see it? Can't you see how beautiful the world is now?!"
L still, did and said nothing to Raito and soon began to dissipate, but in Raito's vulnerable terror of losing L again he screamed, "NO! DON'T GO, STAY, PLEASE!"
L froze at the nearly vanished state he was in and listened as Raito finally uttered; "I want you to be alive again…I…regret killing you, L…I…I…I feel guilty, L…I've never felt guilty, until you! Until you ruined everything!"
L finally leaned forward to Raito, his icy lips ever so close to Raito's as he replied,
"Votre culpabilité, votre regret et larmes ne peuvent pas rapporter les morts vivants, Kira, votre douleur ne signifie rien à moi. Désolé n'est pas assez bon."
Raito's eyes overflowed with tears as L's voice, that had seemed so lost through time, entered his ears and rendered a sweet, rewarding victory. His eyes though, told L that he could not translate, so L whispered against Raito's cold, red ears, "Your pain means nothing, Kira-sama."
Raito's eyes shut tightly in pain; L's cold words hitting him like ten swords through his back. When he opened his eyes, though, L was gone and Raito was left to howl and weep in the stormy night shadows.