Stand in the Rain
Shadow of an Echo
Chapter Twenty-Four
Show Me This Life
Ichigo turned again, huffing, but nothing changed. He hadn't really expected it to, but still it was worth trying. He took a deep breath and pulled in his stomach, but the firm little curve he had noticed developing was still there. Not very big yet, but visible. The strong muscles of his abdomen were flattening out; the skin stretching tight. He was going on three and half months pregnant and his daughter was getting big enough to see. "Ah Shinji could you come in here a second?" He called out to the Visored in the next room over.
It wasn't more than two minutes before the blond was skidding into the room, rushing to get to Ichigo in case something was wrong, "What's going on, are you okay?" He interrogated.
"I'm fine," Ichigo assured, turning away from the mirror and towards Shinji. He was only wearing his Hakama so his stomach could be seen clearly. "I have a little problem though; I'm starting to show."
Shinji tried to calm his racing heart, "It's going to be alright, I thought this would be happening soon."
"What if someone notices her?" Ichigo asked worriedly, his hand going to the still tiny bump.
"As long as you don't take your shirt off around other people, I doubt anyone could see her." Shinji assured. "I know because I have seen you before, someone who hasn't might even overlook it entirely even if you didn't keep covered."
"Still, it's only going to get more obvious that I'm gaining weight." He figured he was justified in his terror.
"Well you have been avoiding sparring, maybe we can pass it off as a result of that for a while?" Shinji suggested.
"Just how gullible do you think people are?" Ichigo asked incredulously. "Even right after I got back from Heuco Mundo Retsu had me doing simple exercises to keep in shape. Why wouldn't she do it again now when I'm definitely healthier than before?"
Shinji sighed, "Look there's not much we can do about it, and the only thing I can think of is to ask Retsu if she knows any good, and safe, ways of hiding the baby."
"Sounds like it's a good time to check on Starrk," Ichigo realized Shinji's suggestion really was their only option for the moment.
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It turned out Retsu was not surprised at the visit, "I thought you might be coming in soon. I already have something for you." She reassured, Ichigo letting out a huge sigh of relief at the confident tone.
"Thank you," He responded gratefully.
"I want to keep that baby safe too," She admitted before leaving the room for a few moments to retrieve whatever it was.
Ichigo's eyebrows rose in surprise when she came back with what looked like a wide compression bandage like the ones typically used for strained muscles.
"I'm going to show you how to use this to bind your abdomen correctly, if you do it right the baby will be perfectly safe and it might even give you some relief too," She explained. "As the baby gets heavier she is going to put more of a strain on your back and this should counteract some of that."
"It's really safe for her?" He wasn't sure about that.
"Yes, I'm positive, this is a technique I have used before on female Shinigami who were expecting. It's actually pretty common." Retsu expanded. "If you start getting used to tying and wearing it now it will be more comfortable for you when you get further along."
After that she carefully guided him through the somewhat delicate process, the trick was to get it firm enough to give support while loose enough the baby had room. She was pleased at how quickly he caught on, but he was shaping up to be a very good healer on top of having a lot of motivation to learn this for his daughter's sake.
It was as good a time as any when they were finished to do what he was actually supposed to be, "How are Starrk and Lilynette settling in?"
"I like them," Retsu admitted. "He is a very interesting person, we have already had several good discussions, and she is a happy little thing. I find it fascinating how different they are and yet how close their bond is. It is truly amazing to watch them together. It looks to me more like he is her father than any kind of commander or battle partner."
"I think with those two it is more of a family kind of thing, or at least that's the closest word we have for it. They might not act a whole lot alike but they are completely devoted to each other." He was now fully aware just what the connection between them was, but it didn't change that fact it really did look like Starrk was her father.
Retsu looked contemplative for a moment, "I think he makes for a very good father, no matter the true case. For someone caught up in Aizen's net she is still surprisingly innocent and I believe that comes from his influence; he shielded her."
"I know he is very fond of children," Ichigo informed. "He was the first to know about mine, and is probably one of the most protective over her; at least of those not directly related."
"That sounds a lot like the person he presents himself as," She analyzed, "I always find honesty refreshing."
"I think he is old and strong enough he has no real reason not to be," Ichigo offered up a new way of looking at it.
"That is another thing," She continued. "The way he wields his power. He gets people to listen to him just by suggestion. The Espada that came with him show visible signs of submissiveness around him when they are the very picture of dominance when away from him. It is a truly odd dynamic I have not witnessed. Usually once you have a high position like that you have to fight to keep it."
"Not in the Hollow world," Ichigo remembered his lessons well. "Power is everything. They can sense exactly how strong someone is, probably more accurately than we can, Starrk does not need to prove what they already know. If you were at risk of being annihilated you would show a bit of submissiveness too."
"Perhaps," She conceded, "Still, he doesn't even have to raise his voice. It is a level of indoctrination that I really can't understand yet, but I would like to."
"Keep talking with Starrk and I'm sure you will, he is usually okay with answering questions and is pretty calm even if you ask one he doesn't like." Ichigo advised.
"Sounds good, but you should probably be leaving soon if you do not want to attract attention," She warned, realizing just how long they had spent talking. A quick check-up should not run much longer than twenty minutes and by then it had been a little over half an hour.
Ichigo listened to her and with the serious business out of the way he slowly allowed himself to relax and enjoy the fact his baby was healthy and strong enough to be causing this kind of problem. It was truly a good thing that she was growing so well.
He was nothing but a ball of nervous excitement as he waited for nightfall and the chance to sneak over to Jyuushiro's; it was safer to go to his squad since if Ichigo was stopped on the way he could claim he was checking up on Grimmjow where Lisa had never brought any kind of suspicion on herself. Shinji sent a hell butterfly to Shunsui so he would meet them there traveling separately. They were taking absolutely no chances with their baby.
By the time Ichigo got to the private Captain's quarters he heard soft voices from inside the room, he peeked inside to see Jyuushiro and Shunsui holding each other close, Shunsui's lips were on Jyuushiro's forehead while the white-haired captain had his arms wrapped around the slightly taller Shunsui's shoulders.
It was such a simple and sweet moment, but it was something that made Ichigo's heart swell as his hand dropped to his daughter. These were his loves, and with the amount of devotion and care those two had shown to their squads, each other, and now him; he knew his daughter could never ask for better daddies.
He let them have a few minutes of closeness, knowing they needed it after the long separation. Part of being together with them was honoring the history they shared. Centuries of love left a big mark on a soul, and while they had soothed Ichigo's doubts, he wanted their love to stay strong with him rather than in despite of him.
Their bright smiles when they caught sight of him was just more proof that he was a welcome addition and not a burden. The same expression they showed each other, they shared with him. He melted into their arms, connecting the three of them together tightly, feeling lips on his neck and jaw, as he was practically smothered with kisses.
"What's going on? Shinji didn't say anything specific, we were worried." Shunsui explained, they had been comforting each other when Ichigo found them, waiting nervously for their young love to arrive.
"Check for people?" Ichigo requested before saying another word.
"We're alone I already told Sentaro and Kiyone that I was going to bed soon and sent them on rounds, they won't disturb us or allow anyone else in the squad to do it either." Jyuushiro had turned hiding from his squad into an art form, both to get some time with Shunsui and to hide his more minor relapses of illness.
"Then there is something you two should know," Ichigo broke out into a wide smile, snagging one of their hands each and putting them on his stomach. "Can you feel that? She's getting big."
Of course he had not expected the pair of them to break out into tears, it took him a second to realize the sounds he was hearing was not sobbing but relieved and excited laughter. They just about knocked the wind out of him they were hugging him so tightly, rubbing their hands all over their daughter. He relaxed into their ministrations enjoying their touch and love. He so needed that after the fear earlier in the day. No doubt they had their own fears but this was about being together with their growing family. There would be time for worries later once they had celebrated the health of their daughter.
That was before they were interrupted though. What Jyuushiro had not counted on was that there was someone in the compound that was very closely acquainted with Ichigo's power and since the baby gave off a type of presence only one of his kind could detect, Grimmjow had known the moment Ichigo had entered the compound but had taken his time before wandering over.
Blue eyes scanned them measuringly, the trio not breaking apart since it wasn't like the Espada didn't know about them, and they were pretty sure Grimmjow would willingly set himself on fire before he told the head-captain any kind of information. They were a little surprised when he spoke and actually managed to sound concerned, "Is the cub okay?" He saw where their hands were and knew Ichigo attempted to keep meetings contained to more public places so that they were less obvious in their closeness.
"She's fine," Ichigo replied slowly, not taking his eyes away from Jyuushiro and Shunsui, but willing to answer that much at least. "I was telling them something."
"Let me guess, you can see the cub can't you? Thought she would be getting big enough soon," It wasn't hard for him to figure out, but it did bring up a question.
"How would you know?" Not an accusation, just curiosity on Ichigo's part.
The answer Grimmjow gave was quick to come. "I wasn't kidding the other day. I think it's a pity she isn't mine, I would have liked to have a cub." The most surprising thing about the statement was how readily the Espada was willing to admit it.
"You want children?" That somehow was not quite adding up in Jyuushiro's head.
"Don't you?" Grimmjow fired back. "What? Because I'm a Hollow I can't want a cub?"
Seemed to Jyuushiro that they had already had this discussion, but it sounded like the Arrancar had yet to believe him. "Look, I've told you this before. When I make comments like that it is not because you are a Hollow, I love Ichigo and he is one too, I say it because it's you. Pretty much all I know at this point is you like to fight, how would I know you wanted a family?"
"Like the rest of you Shinigami would really care, let alone think to ask?" Grimmjow accused, crossing his arms in front of him in irritation. "I happen to like both fighting and cubs, is that so hard to believe?"
"Coming from you? It is surprising, yes." Shunsui was unafraid to admit, "But that doesn't mean we don't believe you now.
"Well, when this whole mess with Aizen is over maybe you'll find someone. I think you may discover several people of interest should you think to look." Ichigo added onto the conversation. "I wasn't kidding either you know, I would still love and take care of her if she we're yours, but you will never hear me regret how things turned out." He turned to press a kiss against each of his love's cheeks in reassurance.
"Yeah right. Play nice with the Shinigami? I don't think so. I'd want someone stronger to give me a cub," Grimmjow dismissed.
"I think you may just be surprised at the kind of strength some Shinigami have, a lot of them are young but tough, and those are the ones you are most likely to get through to. They haven't had as much time to be indoctrinated with hatred towards Hollows. You have pride, I'm fully aware of that, but you will find someone that matches that. Give it a chance at least." Ichigo did care about Grimmjow, he owed his life and now his daughter's of course he'd want to reassure him.
"I'm not holding my breath," To say Grimmjow was still skeptical was a bit of an understatement. "Now, do I get a chance to see her or not?" He demanded, once again surprising the trio.
A few quick telling glances at each other had Shunsui and Jyuushiro slowly sliding off to the side, not letting go of Ichigo but giving the Espada access to his front.
Grimmjow indulged in a good long look before reaching a hand out and setting it on the barely there curve, opening his senses to the baby; seeing if she would respond to him. The enthusiastic flare he felt made his eyes go wide, before he sent another testing wave towards her, only to have that one reflected to him once more. "She is getting strong, the cub can hit back now." There was a difference in what they felt in the beginning of fuzzy awareness, this was deliberate, she was learning to control the power around her. "This is likely instinctive now, but still, it's a sign she is toughening up."
"She can do that already?" Ichigo asked incredulously, his own hand forcing Grimmjow's away.
"Of course she can, she's one of us," Grimmjow stated like it was the most obvious thing in the world. "I don't know how it works for a Shinigami, but in Hollows being able to respond to power sent to her with her own works the same as kicking will later; it's practice. A Hollow is born ready to fight. Never forget you are not only a Shinigami, you are also a Hollow, and so is this cub."
"Our children practice too," Jyuushiro informed. "How early they start doing it just depends on how strong the baby is. Though I guess with the Hollow influence she might be hitting those stages sooner than she would otherwise."
Grimmjow shook his head, "No, trust me, she's strong. I believe she would be able to do it whether she was a Hollow or not." That comment had the conversation sway back onto safer topics.
The four of them were surprisingly comfortable around each other, enough that they found themselves sitting in Jyuushiro's quarters calmly talking until late into the night, and Ichigo realized he needed to head back to the Fifth squad before it was discovered that he had left Shinji 'unsupervised' for most of the night.
He made one more stop before going home, he snuck into the Squad Nine compound and managed to wake his dad up without catching anyone's notice. Since he couldn't be completely sure of being alone, he just put a finger to his lips asking for silence, before putting his father's hand on his lower belly like he had done with Jyuushiro and Shunsui.
He endured a near bone-crushing hug, and Isshin kissed the top of his head in the riot of orange hair, whispering, "I'm so proud of you."
"I wanted you to know," Ichigo responded just as quietly, "Retsu is helping me hide her but I didn't want to keep her hidden from you too."
Isshin's warm hand rubbed in firm circles over the baby, "Thank you for telling me. I love your little girl already, I know you are going to be so good with her."
"She is going to be so loved," Ichigo observed, "There are so many people waiting for her. I just want her here and safe already."
"I know you do, and so do I, but don't rush her. She'll come when she's ready." Isshin assured before giving him another hug. "Everything will be fine, you concentrate on keeping her healthy and the rest of us will worry about keeping her safe. We won't let anything happen to her."
"That's all I want." Ichigo admitted, letting his father soothe away some of his worries. He was glad Isshin had decided to follow him back. As weird and unpredictable as Isshin could be, Ichigo couldn't imagine trying to get through this without him.
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It was another week later and despite going on three weeks without bad incidents since the Espada and Visoreds arrived the hybrids were still on lock down. Lilynette had the worst cabin fever, she had been cooped up for so long she was practically bursting with restless energy. She could only travel with Starrk and in turn he couldn't go anywhere unless he had an upper level officer or Ichigo with him.
The solution had been found in a bouncing ball of pink Shinigami. Yachiru had been enraptured by Lilynette; impressed that such a strong person was wrapped up in a child's body just like her. With her and Kenpachi escorting the pair of Arrancar, Lilynette finally got a chance to see more of the unfamiliar world she found herself in, they did have to leave Nnoitra and Tesla with another captain, but Komamura took them on as good practice for his squad. This let Kenpachi and Starrk allow the girls to pretty much run around like maniacs while they got the chance to talk.
Kenpachi was immediately questioning the Primera, "Just what would it take to get you to spar with me? That Nnoitra is good, but I want to see what you can do." He was itching for that kind of blood boiling battle.
"I don't fight unless I have to," Starrk readily admitted. "Nnoitra and Grimmjow are your best bets for a few rounds of fighting, though Szayel can be provoked if he thinks he can get something out of it."
"What good is power you don't use?" Kenpachi was having trouble with the concept of someone so strong unwilling to exercise that skill.
"I happen to believe the best weapon is one you don't have to use more than once. I have already proven myself to my subordinates so I feel no need to push it further until I am called on for a real battle." Starrk explained calmly. It was a conversation he had been involved in before when the more volatile Espada got too annoying, he put them in their place and sent them off.
"Damn, and I was hoping for a good spar," Kenpachi grumbled. "Been trying to track down Ichigo but he keeps slipping away. Now that is a man who can fight."
"You won't be getting him to fight any time soon," Starrk informed, his protective streak coming to the forefront. "He has been through hell lately, give him a chance to heal." That was as much as he felt safe saying that might impress on the violent captain the seriousness of the matter.
Kenpachi was more fervent than he was anticipating though, "He's had months to pull himself together; a good brawl can knock him back into shape quicker than anything else."
"Look that's not the problem," Starrk added, rubbing at the back of his neck. "If you want to talk to him about it that's fine, but like I said, he won't fight you no matter what you try to provoke him with."
"I might just talk with him, but I can't help trying for a spar, he's one of the best fighters around here." Kenpachi insisted.
"I know he is, but he needs a break," Starrk responded firmly. "I know exactly how strong he is; we helped train him. That also means I know when he's had too much, and that is now."
"Doesn't hurt to try," Kenpachi replied before raising his voice, "Come on Yachiru, we're going to see Ichigo."
As soon as the sentence was out of his mouth he had an overexcited little girl latched onto his shoulder. "Yay!" She exclaimed happily, looking expectantly at Starrk and Lilynette with begging eyes. "Hurry up!" She ordered.
Starrk couldn't help but chuckle at her, he really did like children and she was such an adorable little devil. It was almost impossible for him to not like her.
It did not take long for the Espada to realize just how bad Kenpachi's sense of direction was. Pesquisa came in handy and he found himself glad the power limiter did not seem to affect it all that much.
They found Ichigo working with Shinji in the Squad five office. They were digging through paperwork, letting the old captain figure out just how much Aizen had messed with his system, it was weird, but he actually found it not much different than he left it.
"What brings you here?" Ichigo asked as he caught sight of the unusual grouping.
"Wanted a spar and we were together, so they followed us." Kenpachi explained bluntly, "What do you say, ditch the paperwork and come with me?"
"No," Ichigo immediately refused. "Retsu has still not cleared me to fight you." Which was true enough.
"It's been forever, you look good enough. Come on, fight me!" Kenpachi tried to demand, Shinji rising up to argue, before Ichigo motioned him down.
"I am not going to fight you, that's final!" He insisted forcibly.
Kenpachi's eyes narrowed, he might be violent, but he was not stupid. "Alright, just what is going on here? You're hiding something, and these guys are in on it." He accused, jabbing his hand towards Starrk, meaning the Arrancar in general with the gesture.
"What difference does it make to you?" Ichigo refuted. "All you need to know is I'm not going to spar with you."
Kenpachi was surprised himself at how much that statement stung, "Hey, you think I don't care that something's wrong?"
"It's not like we've done much of anything but fight," Ichigo pointed out, fighting the urge to cover his baby protectively. He was not afraid of Kenpachi per say, but he was not the gentlest of people and if he didn't know to be careful he might hurt the little girl inside him by accident.
"You are one of the few people who has managed to beat me, I respect you for that. Unless you have forgotten I am a captain, I care when it's important. So spill it, what's going on?" He demanded, though the explanation made several people in the room realize they had underestimated him a bit.
It took a minute of frantic internal debate, Junichi adding in his own opinion, "I kinda think we should tell him King."
"Why?" He hadn't expected his Hollow to advise that course of action.
Junichi didn't have a problem answering, "He's serious, this is him caring. You want to keep her safe don't you? If we have Kenpachi on our side that's one more strong fighter protecting her, and it's not like he is all buddy-buddy with the head-captain. I doubt he'd tell on us, at least, not about this."
With Junichi's vote considered, Ichigo decided to go along with his recommendation, "Shinji can you take the others outside for a minute? It's probably a good time to check in with the squad." Which was code for making sure no one was within hearing range while he spoke with Kenpachi.
The older Visored nodded, the only one really protesting the move was Yachiru, but Lilynette's promise of a spar when they were outside was enough to lure her out of the office, leaving Ichigo and Kenpachi alone.
"So you going to tell me now or what?" Kenpachi asked impatiently.
"Just wait a few minutes please, need to give Shinji time to distract everyone," Ichigo requested, moving over to the door and carefully looking outside so no one would see him. The less he looked suspicious the better. When he judged it was safe he started to talk, not quite sure how to do this with someone he didn't know as well as the others. "It's not just you I can't fight, it's too big a risk for me to spar with anyone at all. I'm taking care of someone." He settled on that as a starting point.
"Who? If you're defending someone wouldn't that mean you would fight harder?" Kenpachi was confused and impatient, but willing to listen.
"Not this time," Ichigo corrected before finally being able to put his hand over his daughter. "I'm pregnant," He admitted quietly then added on, "I need to protect my baby, and if we fight she could get hurt."
That brought Kenpachi up short, "You're not just messing with me are you?"
"Why would I lie about something like this?" Ichigo questioned, before opening his Shihakusho to show his cloth wrapped stomach and loosening the bandage. "There, do you see her now?"
Kenpachi did in fact see her, and that prompted him to ask, "How long has it been?"
"Almost four months," Ichigo confessed slowly, knowing Kenpachi would quickly do the rather simple math.
"That means her father is here," Kenpachi observed, confirming Ichigo's assumption.
"Yes, but that is as much as I am willing to say until I have her, and you can't tell anyone about this; she is in a lot of danger. I wouldn't have told you, but my Hollow thought it was a good idea. Please don't make me regret it." Ichigo tried to impress on him just how serious this was.
"I'm not going to hurt your kid, and won't let anyone else either." Once again Kenpachi found himself a bit insulted that Ichigo was so afraid of him, though it wasn't like he couldn't understand; what with the scars and large body. Still, "We need more strong fighters around here and if she is yours I can't see her being anything else."
For Ichigo that was unexpected, but definitely a relief. "Thank you."
"I don't lie about myself, but don't forget, I took Yachiru with me instead of leaving her to grow up in the gutters of blood like I did. I taught her to fight and made her strong." Kenpachi reminded. "I don't hurt kids." He spelled out.
"I didn't think so," Ichigo was quick to assure, "But things happen and I have to keep her safe no matter what. Telling anyone new means trusting them with my daughter's life."
"I know," Kenpachi confessed. "Look, I know how hard it is to tell me, all I'm doing is trying to make you see that you don't have to worry."
"I always have to worry, she's mine, and because of that she will be hated." His blood ran cold at the thought.
"Not everyone will hate her," Kenpachi pointed out. "In case you didn't notice I have a daughter, her name is Yachiru. I raised her, that makes her mine, and only mine. It may not be blood but there are enough people around here who think I don't belong I kind of thought some might try to take it out on her, but they haven't. Personally I think it would have been nice to have a boy running around, but this works too."
Ichigo had never thought of that. He really hadn't. Kenpachi and Yachiru were a family, he understood that now looking back. Kenpachi was right, despite being a Captain he was still on the outskirts, he had fought his way in rather than working his way up like the others were trying. Whether it was jealousy, fear, or envy, he was disliked by many. Ichigo was such a blunt and honest person the idea of fighting a battle that dirty sickened him. To deliberately go after a child was the worst thing a person could do in his opinion, and it was that mindset that had set him up to meet Starrk while he was healing the injured Lilynette.
He was startled out of his thoughts by a scarred hand landing on his should, "Anyone touches her I'll rip them apart." Kenpachi was serious, Ichigo had absolutely no doubt.