Flashback in italics.
Chapter 25
"Mmm.." Arizona moaned as she slowly woke from a deep sleep when she felt a soft kiss on her neck, followed by another then another. "Again?" She sleepily questioned.
"Mmhmm.."
The blonde didn't think she could go one more time with this mesmerizing woman... Okay who was she kidding, she could go the rest of her life and not even take a break for food or water.
The feeling she was having was something she had never known. She had never felt this happy in her life. "I was afraid to wake up and realize I was only dreaming," she whispered. "Imagine my surprise when I realizes it wasn't just a dream," She couldn't help but shine her resident smile when she felt the warm wet lips of the woman partially laying on her. "I could get used to this," she mumbled as she rolled on her back when the object of her affection initiated further.
"Good morning," she whispered as she kissed the notch of the blondes neck while she entwined her leg with the blondes.
"Morning," the blonde sleepily answered as she stretched her body, remembering every detail about the previous night. She could definitely do this every day and night.
"So you could get used to this, huh?" She asked as she propped herself up on her elbow and looked down at the blonde woman beneath her.
"Oh yeah," she opened her eyes and looked up at the brunette for the first time this morning. "My new favorite thing," she whispered as she brushed dark brown tresses behind her ear. "You are so beautiful," she said, through her dimpled smile. "I'm so lucky you're in my life."
"You?" She rebuttaled. "It's quite the opposite, really," she smiled, as she took in the blondes traits.
"Hey," She whispered when she saw her biting on the corner of her lip as if she was questioning something. "I don't regret anything about last night."
"You don't?" Arizona asked. What happened last night was not planned on her part and she was scared that when the haze of the night wore off Callie would have some affliction about last night. Sleeping with her was the last thing she's ever thought would happen.
"No, I don't."
"I just," she sighed. "I like you, a lot, but I'm scared. I don't want to lose you as a friend if anything were to happen. You're my best friend and I don't ever want that to change."
"I'm scared too." She confirmed. "Really scared."
"I know," she said, cupping the brunette's cheeks. "I'll never hurt you physically, Callie," She said, slowly creasing her thumb over the Latina's cheeks. "Or emotionally, not intentionally, anyway."
"I hope not," she closed her eyes and whispered while basked in the loving feel of the blondes touch before she placed her hand on top of Arizona's that laid on her face. Callie had never felt so at ease and content with anyone before.
"I only have one regret." Arizona said, moving her hands from the woman's face to her long hair.
"What's that?" Callie fluttered her eyes open.
"The alcohol," She moaned, rubbing her stomach. "My tummy hurts."
She couldn't help but giggle at the woman. "I tried to tell you," she said as she brought her hand down to her stomach and softly caressed her skin. "You need some water and some Advil," she said as she kissed her on the cheek. "Why don't you go take a hot bath, and I'll bring you some water while you relax, then I'll make some breakfast, and after, we can lay back down."
"And cuddle?" she grinned as the brunette began to sit up in bed.
"Maybe," she smiled.
"Hey," she gently grabbed her arm, stopping her. "Can I have a little kiss first?" She asked shyly.
"Little?" Callie raised her eyebrow.
"Well, I mean," she shrugged her shoulders. "I'll take whatever you're giving out," Arizona said, pulling her back down to the bed as the woman giggled at her eagerness. "You don't know how long I wanted to be able to do this," she whispered, her lips ghosting across the brunette's red buds as she ran her fingers through brown hair.
"Really?" She blushed, smiling down at her.
"Oh yeah," she nodded, feeling the Latina meet their lips together in a slow tender kiss.
"Me too," she breathed against pink lips as she softly caressed the blondes jawline.
"Really?" The blonde questioned, feeling Callie nip at her bottom lip gently.
"Really," she whispered as their lips met again.
After pulling herself away from the bay window of her apartment where she had been thinking about things that transpired in the last fourteen hours, Callie made some coffee for herself, and grabbed a bottle of water and some aspirin for the blonde and laid them by her bedside table before starting on breakfast.
She didn't care that it was past noon on a Saturday, she needed some bacon to get her day started. She couldn't eat the breakfast meat without thinking back to her breakfast with the blonde on her first public outing in Seattle where she and Arizona shared two plates of the food.
Smiling at the thought, she placed the bacon in the pan, picked up her coffee and walked back to the bay window. It was a place she liked to conjure to when she needed to think things over.
A lot of things had materialized over night. With her fully admitting her thoughts and possible feelings to Betty and then things with Arizona, she really needed time to think about everything and what they meant to her friendship with the blonde. That was what she was worried about the most. If they were to get together and things went sour, she was afraid she wouldn't make it without the blonde in her life.
Just as she got comfy in her seat while she started breaking the events down in her head again for the second time this morning she was brought out of her little daze by a moaning blonde.
Peering over to the woman's bed, she saw the blonde wrap her arms around the dog who was laying with her on the mattress. With every lick from the dog, the louder the blondes moans became, and if Callie didn't know any better she thought she saw Arizona lean in and kiss him back. Snickering, she stood up from the seat and made her way closer to the blondes bed.
"Poussey," she whispered, trying to get the dogs attention as he continued to take long licks up the blondes face. "Get down," she giggled as the blonde mumbled something in her sleep. She was actually quite surprised the blonde hadn't been up and down all night. "Stop," she snapped her fingers at him. She knew if the woman woke up with her dog licking her face it wouldn't be pretty for him.
"Callie," Arizona moaned as she sleepily ran her fingers through what she thought was thick brown hair.
"Wh..." She was caught off guard when Arizona whispered her name in her sleep.
"Mmm..." The blonde moaned again as she rolled her head over to the side. "You're going to have to stop that unless you plan on cuddling in bed all day." A smirk appeared on her lips and the dog continued to feast at her face.
"Poseidon, stop," the brunette clapped her hands, getting the dogs attention as well as the blondes.
"Wha..." Arizona opened her eyes at the annoying sound that broke her out of her amazing dream. Looking to her right, she saw a large wet tongue coming at her face. "What the hell..." She groaned, quickly dodging the dog and looking around the room to take in her surrounding. "No..." She whined, throwing her head back against the pillow when she saw the woman in her dreams standing at the foot of her bed with a smirk on her face. "Why?" It really was all just an elaborate dream. "Get the hell away from me," she complained, pushing the dog off the bed a little too roughly, but she didn't care at the moment. She thought those were Callie's lips being pressed all over her face and neck and to find out it was only the dog broke her heart.
Why? Why couldn't it be true?
Oh god. Arizona quickly cringed when she remembered moaning the brunette's name.
"Some dream you were having?" Callie giggled at the rough looking blonde with disheveled hair.
It felt so real she knew she must have said her name out loud, but by the look on the Latina's face she wasn't quite sure. Before she could ask anything, she suddenly felt her world become tipsy. "Ughhhh..." She moaned when she felt her head spin. Blinking her eyes several times, she tried to ride the dizzy feeling. "Oh god," she said, feeling like her belly was doing flip flops. "Oh no," she felt the on onslaught of her stomach bubbling to the surface.
She needed to get to the bathroom and she needed to get there now or she was sure to blow chunks everywhere. Fumbling with the covers, she tried to disentangle herself from the blankets that seemed to be wrapped around her body.
Seeing the blondes cheeks expand with air and her hand immediately grab at her stomach, Callie knew it was coming. Arizona was in for the worst hangover of her life. She tried to quickly help pull the covers away from the blonde, but unfortunately it wasn't fast enough. As soon as the woman was free from her confines of the bed she took a few steps before she was bent over heaving the contents of her stomach up.
"Oh god," Callie cringed when she saw the blonde puke all over herself. She felt so bad for her, but she warned her the night to slow it down.
Quickly grabbing the small trash can by the bed, the brunette hurried over to her friend and placed the contained on the floor in front of her. "Here," she whispered, rubbing the blondes back as she threw her head into the bin and emptied her stomach again.
It was taking all the Latina had not to gag or throw up herself. She and vomit didn't go to well. She couldn't stand to hear the retching sound as someone threw up. She had been like that since she was a kid. Every time her sister would be sick, Callie would be too if she heard or saw it.
So, it was taking all the brunette had to hold back her gag when Arizona was sick. "It's okay," she whispered as she grabbed the blondes hair and pulled it out of her face. "Eww..." She whispered, turning her head, and trying to hold herself together when she felt puke in the blondes hair. "Get it all out so you won't puke later," she breathed as she tried to soothe the sick blonde by rubbing her back.
"I can't believe that just happened," Arizona inhaled deeply as she slightly raised her head out of the can. "Oh god," she looked around and saw the fluids on her legs and feet. The blonde was immediately embarrassed when she realized what she had done. "Please," she took several staggering breathes. She felt like she had been holding her breath for several minutes. "Go away. I don't want you to see this," she tried to push herself away from the woman of her dreams only to cause herself to slip and fall to the ground.
"ARIZONA," Callie yelled when the blonde started to slip. She tried to catch her but she was too late. The woman ended up laying in her own vomit, a crumpled mess on the floor. Cursing to herself, she tried to coax the woman out of the floor. "Come on," she said grabbing the woman under her arms and trying to pick her up. "Help me here," she said when the blonde just laid there helplessly. "I'm not the best with bodily fluids, so unless you want my vomit on you, too, I suggest you help me out a little. We need to get you in the shower," she grunted as she finally pulled the blonde up.
"You're freakishly strong, carry me," the blonde mumbled as she wrapped her arm around the brunette's neck.
"I'm not carrying you, you can walk," she said as she guided the woman into the bathroom and sat her down on the toilet seat while she turned on the warm water in the shower.
"What are you doing," she mumbled as she looked up at the brunette when she heard the water running. She couldn't really focus on what was going on around her, all she wanted to do was curl back up in bed and sleep the day away after she took something for her splitting headache.
"You stink, you need a shower," she said as she grabbed the woman's hand and got her to stand up. "Arms up." She stated, pulling the woman's t-shirt over her head. After last night, she couldn't help but gaze at the blondes body a little longer than normal.
Yes, yes it could really be an attraction she was having towards her and not just admiration or gratitude. The blonde had an amazing body, Callie just had never had a chance to admire it before.
Thankful that Arizona still had her bra on, she then helped her out of her shorts before putting the woman in the warm shower. Yet again, she found her self staring and wondering what it would feel like to be in a relationship with Arizona. She was sweet and loving to her already, would it really be much different if they were a couple?
She knew she shouldn't be thinking these things right now after everything that had happened to her. A relationship with anyone was the last thing she needed right now, but she couldn't help thinking about it because she had been wondering about for a few weeks now.
Shaking the thoughts out of her head, She was glad Arizona was in a hazy state because she would have been definitely been caught ogling her. "You can finish undressing yourself," she told the woman who was standing under the running water in her underwear. Even though she did have puke on her, Callie still thought she was a beautiful specimen.
"You're not leaving me here alone, are you?" Arizona looked over to the woman. "What if I need to puke again?"
"Yes I am. I don't see how you have anything left inside you. You should be okay. Plus, I have breakfast cooking and you need to finish undressing and bathe. You have puke all over yourself, remember?" She raised her eyebrow at the blonde. Even if she was currently sick, she was cute. 'Damn it. Stop thinking those things.' She said to herself.
"Oh god," she groaned when she looked down at her body. "Get out," she said, pulling the shower curtain back so Callie couldn't see her standing there in her skivvies. "How the hell did I get undressed?" She questioned, feeling herself exposed. Her mind currently wasn't working. The pain from her head and stomach along with the awful taste in her mouth was all the could concentrate on at the moment.
"I undressed you," the Latina laughed, and went to wash the vomit off her her hands and arms. "Yell if you need me," she said, drying her hands before walking out the door. "Oh, there's some Advil and water by your bed."
"Please," Arizona cringed. "No yelling," she moaned, grabbing her head.
Callie wasn't out of the bathroom a moment when she heard the blonde turn the shower off and start to run a bath instead.
Going back to the kitchen to check on the bacon, she flipped it and then turned it down lower so she had some time to clean up the mess the blonde had made. She wasn't one to stomach this, but for Arizona she would push through and clean it up.
It wasn't without a few dry heaves, did she finally get the mess cleared. She figured by the time she was finished the blonde would be out of the bath, but she hadn't heard a peep from inside the room.
"Hey?" She peeked her head in the door to check on the blonde after finishing breakfast. "Arizona," she said softly when she walked back into the bathroom to check on her friend. Seeing Arizona leaned back in the tub with her eyes closed. "Wake up," she shook her shoulder. "Why are you sleeping in the tub?" Only receiving a low moan from the blonde, she smacked her up beside the head. "Wake up do you realize you are sitting in a bath with puke chunks? This disgusting," she couldn't help but laugh. "Shower, so you can get back in bed," she laughed. "And why are you still in your underwear?"
"Oh god," she groaned. "I feel like shit," she said, finally opening her eyes. "I didn't have the strength to take them off. All I wanted to do was lay down, so I decided to lay here."
"I see that," she said, handing the woman a bottle of water. "Take these."
"Thanks," Arizona took the pain relievers and downed them in one quick gulp. "What the hell happened last night?" She asked in a raspy voice as she slowly sat up in the tub and and her fingers through her wet hair. "Oww...Why is my forehead sore?" She questioned feeling the throbbing headache pulse through her head, followed by a terrible rumbled in her stomach.
"Do you... not.. remember anything?" Callie questioned.
"Not really. I remember ordering Margarita's. Everything after that is a huge blur."
"Seriously? You remember nothing?" She seemed a little disappointed in the blonde. She was hoping they could discuss some of what happened last night, but if the blonde didn't remember it she didn't want to embarrass her with some of the things.
"No. I don't even remember how I ended up in bed."
"I just want to be able to hold her when she cries, or hug her when she's happy or excited. I want to be able to do those things and not worry if I'm crossing the line. I want her, all of her." She heard Arizona mumbled as she lazily rubbed her back. She wasn't sure what she was should say. Arizona had caught her off guard with her admittance and she didn't even know for sure what she was feeling. She though she may have feelings for the blonde, but she hadn't quite determined what those feelings were yet.
"I want to show her what it's like to truly be loved by someone." Arizona said as she laid there on the table. "I'm such an idiot, falling for someone so beautiful, sweet and caring. She'd never go for someone like me. I'm too damaged."
"You're not damaged." Callie whispered, finally getting the blondes attention.
"Callie," Arizona quickly lifted her head when she heard the brunette's voice. "What are you..." Did she hear her confession? Oh god. 'Please, please, please tell me I'm dreaming' the voice in her head repeated. "What are you doing here? Where's April?" She looked around for her friend.
"She just left," she said, the blondes shoulders slump in relief. "You okay? Who were you talking about? Falling for someone?" She questioned, wondering if the blonde would just come out and openly admit her feelings for her.
"I uh... no.. nobody." She shrugged. "Food ready yet? I'm starving."
"Yeah. It should be out in a minute." Callie told her. "You would tell me, right?"
"Tell you what?"
"If anything is bothering you. Whether is good or bad. You'd tell me, right? Because you can, you can tell me anything in this world," she tried to get the blonde to confess to her. "I mean that. Nothing you tell me would ever change our relationship for the worst," and she meant that. Whether they each had feelings for one another or not, Arizona would always be her best friend. The blonde meant too much to her.
Knitting her brows together, she wondered where Callie was coming from all of the sudden. Did she actually over hear what she told April? Hell, maybe she should just go ahead and tell her, she was drunk and it would be less painful at the moment to get rejected while inebriated. "I.. I uhh..." She stuttered. "There's nothing to tell," she shrugged her shoulders. "There's just someone I really really like, but I'm just not the person for her."
"How do you know?"
"I don't think she likes me. Not the way I like her. I don't think she even realizes I exist in that way."
"You may be surprised," she shrugged her shoulders. She was flattered knowing Arizona was talking about her, but it also made her feel sad. Sad that the blonde didn't seem to think highly of herself. "You'll never know if you don't just come out and say something to her."
Arizona was smart, beautiful and loyal to a fault. Anyone would be lucky to have her as a significant other.
"I don't want to look like a complete fool because that's how I feel. Lusting after someone I can't have. It sucks," Arizona sighed.
"Well, I think that woman would feel flattered and very, very lucky to have someone like you feel those things for her," Callie said truthfully. Maybe Betty's words were right. Why waste you time wondering instead of doing?"
"I would be the lucky one," she whispered, barely audible when she laid her head back on he table.
The Latina's heart fluttered when she heard the blondes low voice. To have someone feel that way about her felt good, really good, but it also scared her. She wasn't sure what she was feeling or if she was ready for anything like this, but she may not every feel ready for any kind of relationship again, however if she kept that mind frame she could let a golden opportunity at truly being happy pass right on by. "Look at me," she nudged her.
"What?" Arizona asked sadly.
"Anyone would be lucky to have you. Why don't you believe that?" She said when the blonde looked at her as she hook her head. "Why do you see yourself short all the time? To someone out there somewhere you are worth it," she said, tucking blonde hair behind her ear. "You are it for someone."
"I don't know. I think I'm going to die alone in my apartment at an old age surrounded by thirty cats." She grumbled. "I'll only be remembered on the streets as the crazy cat lady, and I don't even like cats," she pouted.
"Stop feeling sorry for yourself. You're sweet, good looking, intelligent and you will make a very good partner to someone in the future and and if you think different, maybe you will be alone forever."
Arizona was surprised that the brunette said that. "Wha.." She looked at her. "See, even you think I'll be alone forever," she whined as she laid her head back on the table as the food came.
"Oh my god, there is no talking to you when you're this drunk," Callie shook her head, she knew better than trying to get anything out of her at the moment. "Eat," she pushed the plate over to her. "I'm going to go get you a water, you are not drinking anymore." She said as she got up from the booth to get the blonde something else to drink.
"Betty," Callie blurted out when she walked back into the kitchen, startling the woman who was washing dishes. "She said it!"
"Who said what?"
"Arizona. She said she wanted me, all of me." She said in shock.
"She told you that?" Betty said, turning the water off and looked towards the Latina.
"Yes! Well.. no," she thought for a minute. "She said it, but she doesn't realize she said it to me. She's so drunk that she thought April was still sitting beside her, but she wasn't. It was me."
"Hmm..."
"Damn it," she began to second guess what had transpired. "Why the hell does she have to be drunk right now?" She asked, picking up some of the dirty glasses that were setting on the counter and throwing them in the dirty dishwater. "Why can't she be sober and actually tell me what she's feeling," she said, aggravated at the situation.
"Maybe it's a good thing that she is drunk, it gives you some time to decipher what you're actually feeling. Knowing what she is feeling for you, it may help you determine what you are feeling for her?"
"Maybe, but how do I actually know what I'm feeling? I'm new at all of this. This is foreign territory for me, and I'm not even talking about that fact that she's a woman."
"I think you know, and you're scared to admit it. It's okay to be scared. It wouldn't be worthwhile if it was easy."
"I don't know," she crossed her arms and leaned against the counter. "Why does she like me?"
"Why does she like you?" She asked. "It sounds like to me the question should be, why do you doubt yourself? Do you feel not good enough?"
"Look what all I've been through. She knows everything, so why would she want someone like me, I'm damaged. What does she see in that? Why isn't she turned off by it all?
"You know," Betty said. "I've asked myself the same thing. What does she see in you? Let's see..." She said as she noticed a bit of trepidation in the brunette's eyes. "You're gorgeous, tall, sweet as the day is long, caring, according to her you're the most fun to be around. Just because you see faults within yourself doesn't mean that she doesn't see them as attributes."
"I don't know," she shook her head.
"Listen, I get what you've been through, and I'm sure you've been taught to feel inadequate?" She questioned. "But you're not. We always see the worst in ourselves."
"She doesn't make me feel less than I am when I'm around her, but what if I'm not enough?"
"You're questioning yourself, because you're used to being put down. You know that right? As long as you question your place in someone's life..."
"Mitch wins," she sighed, finishing the older woman's sentence.
"Yeah. He's the reason you're standing here right now, debating your have got to learn to let things he has said, go, because you and I both know he's only blowing hot air. You shouldn't let something he has said in the past, question your future. Just be happy."
"Why can't she just admit it to me when she's sober?"
"Why can't you just admit it to her when she's sober?" Betty turned it around on her.
"Touché," Callie groaned and she threw her head back on her shoulders. "I hate this. Shit gets too complicated."
"Umm... I hate to interrupt," April said, poking her head in the door. "But someone really needs to get Arizona under control. She's standing in her booth belting out the lyrics to "Crazy for this girl"."
"Why don't you take that hot mess home," Betty chuckled as she turned back around to finish her dishes.
"Oh god," she groaned and walked over to the cooler. "I'm not taking her anywhere until she downs this water," she grabbed the bottle from the fridge. "Put the food on my tab," she walked back out to the bar to find the blonde dancing in her seat. "Lord help me."
"Well," Callie couldn't help but giggle. "You were a hot mess at the bar. I had to basically throw you over my shoulder and carry you all the way home and up the stairs. You are really dead weight when your drunk."
"Oh my god," she moaned, covering her face. "I'm sorry," she rolled her eyes at herself. "I guess I made a total fool out of myself."
"Only at the end when you were up on the table dancing and sing to Evan and Jaron. And you kept asking me to really listen to the lyrics. That's when I decided you had enough."
"Oh god," she sank down in the water, embarrassed. "Not that song," she shook her head.
"Yes, that song." She grinned.
"Oh my god, I don't even know what all I did, can we just forget about everything that happened then?"
"No, there's somethings I don't want to forget," she knelt down beside the tub, debating in her head whether she should just bring up her feelings or not.
"Take a shower," Callie said, seeing the blonde cover her face up. Right now was probably not the time. "You're really defeating the purpose of the bath when you're sitting in puke water.. Wash the stink off of you. I have breakfast ready," she stood from her kneeling position after she I unstopped the tub and turned the shower back on. "You can eat and then go back to bed, because that's what I feel like doing after breakfast."
"What am I eating?"
"Bacon and eggs."
"Okay, okay," Arizona groaned, pulling herself up and discarding the rest of her garments before she began to clean herself up.