A/N: Welcome to another installment of My Turn!

Wow…three goddamn weeks. I apologize for this, but I've been pretty busy as of late. I had to deal with a few issues that I'd rather not talk about, then there was Thanksgiving weekend after that. And I'll be even more busy now that finals are coming up.

Now…we've reached a milestone.

Over 100,000 views!

Hot damn! Violet, squeal in joy for me!

Violet: Eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!

Good girl!

Seriously, thank you guys for giving this story a chance, despite it being a self-insert. I'm still amazed by the reception this story garners.

Now, I made a change in the last chapter. Instead of that helmet I used to have, I now have a black cowboy hat and black shades. The cowboy hat was just too tempting, and the shades are just a bonus.

Right, now last we left off, my shopping with Coco was finished, I ran into three-quarters of Team RWBY, and I reunited with Winter.

Let's see what happens next, shall we?"

ON WITH THE CHAPTER!

Disclaimer: I don't own RWBY.

I honestly can't believe it….

Seriously, I was absolutely positive that Winter wouldn't show up to Beacon until the beginning of the Vytal Festival, if at all, depending on whether Cinder and Salem are stopped beforehand.

Don't get me wrong. I'm glad she's here right now. I mean, she's my second favorite character in the show, and she and I got along pretty well the last time we met….

I feel like there's another reason, but for the life of me, I can't think of it.

In any case…I can't help but wonder why she's here.

The first idea that came to mind was Weiss. Maybe Winter was here so that she'd see Weiss off or something?

"Colt?"

Nah, she'd have been here beforehand if that were the case. Plus, she wasn't here to begin with in the show. And while I can't assume every detail in the show will be evident here, I'd like to think that Winter was too busy with her duty as a Specialist to be able to see Weiss off.

"Colt."

So unless she filed for some vacation time and chose to use some of it to visit Weiss, then the only other explanation would be that she was sent here by Ironwood.

So that begs the question: why would Ironwood send Winter-?

"Colt!"

"W-Wha?"

I was snapped out of my musings by Winter's shout and found that she was waving a hand in front of my face….

Also, she was really close to me and wow she's beautiful. Also, not as short as I thought she'd be, considering when she stood next to Weiss (even though heights in the show are completely difficult to tell unless Rooster Teeth confirmed it themselves).

If anything, she was about as tall as me (6'3"). Maybe even an inch taller! She does wear heels, though, so I can't really be sure. Plus, I was a little too distracted by her herself to see for sure because wow she's beautiful.

I took a much needed step back.

"Er, sorry! Just…spaced out, I guess."

She hummed. "I see…is this the sort of behavior I should expect to see from you in my time here?"

"N-No! Definitely no-!"

I paused. "Wait…what do you mean by that last part?"

She chuckled. "I suppose you were not informed of my arrival or reason for being here."

No…no I was not.

She smirked at me. "You're looking at the new head of Beacon Security. I am to be stationed here until such time that I am no longer needed."

…

…

The look on my face must've been priceless, if her light chuckling was anything to go by.

Okay, two things come to mind after hearing about this.

One, I'm going to strangle Ozpin, Qrow, and Vert for knowing about this yet choosing to keep it from me.

And two…Winter being the head of security here is…kinda fitting, actually. I mean, who better than a Specialist to head security?

I blinked. "Er, t-that's great! Can't think of anyone else better for the job."

She gave a small smile. "Thank you."

…

…

She frowned. "Now about you destroying Atlas military property…again."

Seriously?!

"T-They attacked me! I was defending myself!"

"That excuse didn't work the first time. It won't work now."

"It's a legitimate excuse! Then and now!"

"In retrospect, it really isn't."

"…What?!"

She closed her eyes. "Had you simply approached less suspiciously, they would not have responded with the appropriate response."

"Appropriate? That first one was gonna shoot me!"

"They would've registered you as a non-threat…eventually."

I deadpanned. "Eventually?"

She nodded, her eyes still closed.

…

…

"Pardon my language, but do you actually believe that bullshit you just spouted, or are you screwing with me?"

She finally opened her eyes to look into my own.

"…Yes."

I opened my mouth, then closed it.

Open. Close.

Open. Close.

Open. Close.

…

…

I took a deep breath and let it out.

"Yeah, okay."

I pointed my thumb behind me. "I'm just gonna go back the way I came and…scream in unholy rage for a good few minutes, so if you'll excuse me."

I turned to leave, only for a hand to rest on my shoulder.

I swear felt a jolt of something electric when that happened….

Must've been static electricity…yeah, definitely.

Winter chuckled. "Calm yourself, Colt. There' no need to go losing your voice over a simple jest."

I wouldn't have screamed that loudly…okay, maybe a little.

No one would blame me though, right? I'd be totally justified.

And "jest"? That's just a fancy word for "troll".

I sighed and turned back to her. "Well again, if you expect me to pay for the damages, then you'll be sorely disappointed."

Her eyes rolled upward. "I don't know. Now that you have your new job in Beason's security detail, you just might be able to-."

"And again, self-defense. So I don't have to pay jackshit."

She glared.

"Er, pardon my language…again."

She smirked. "Very well. In any case, I suppose it would be impossible to prove it wasn't self-defense."

She turned her head to something on her left.

I followed her gaze to find…a camera….

Seriously, how many cameras does Ozpin have?

…Eh, at least there's video proof. And if I somehow get screwed out of that proof, I'm going to kick someone's ass. I don't care who it is.

"Walk with me?"

I turned to find Winter giving me a small smile.

"Um…sure. I need to get some stuff I got earlier anyway. Left it with two new students I know."

"Then I suppose we should make haste."

Winter stepped past me, walking down the courtyard.

I watched her walk a good distance before running to catch up with her.

My eye twitched.

"Colt?"

"Yes?"

"…Didn't you say you left your items with two new students?"

Yes…yes I did.

What do I find instead, you might ask? A cart filled with my stuff…left completely unattended.

A note and a large poster were left on the cart.

The note said:

Hey Colt!

Jaune and I kinda needed to go to the opening ceremony for first years, so we had to ditch your stuff. Don't worry! Jaune and I left a large poster warning anyone away from your stuff. Look for me later so we can work on your weapons!

From, Ruby

P.S. Jaune said this was a bad idea, but I'm sure you won't mind.

I crushed the note in my hand, "Those damn brats. When I get my hands on them, I'll-!"

"Calm yourself, Colt."

I took a deep breath…and let it out.

"…Okay, I'm good."

"Wonderful," Winter said, then looked at the large poster. "…Still, this is an odd poster."

Damn right it is. All it has is a crude drawing of me with a police uniform spouting, "Touch my s-word and I'll take you to jail!"

…

…

I'll admit, this poster was funny.

I folded the poster and set it with my other stuff.

"You're keeping the poster?" Winter asked.

"Yeah. It's funny to look at."

I sighed. "I guess I'll have to take this with me then."

"…Maybe not. You two, over here!"

I looked up when she said that and found those butlers from earlier walking over.

"Ah, Miss Winter! This is certainly a surprise. What can we do for you?"

Winter pursed her lips. "Am I right to assume you two were here for my sister, Weiss?"

"Indeed, m'lady. We've just finished taking her things to where the other luggage is kept. In its own section, of course."

Winter nodded. "Would it be any trouble to ask you take Mr. Remington's items to wherever he's staying before you leave?"

"None whatsoever, Miss Winter."

The butler turned to me. "Mr. Remington, I presume?"

I nodded.

"Very well, where do you wish your items to be taken?"

I gestured towards a building. "Seventh floor. Room 710. Tell whoever's there that this stuff belongs to Colt Remington."

"Of course, Mr. Remington."

I'd have said for them to call me Colt, but I've seen enough TV to know they won't break proper etiquette.

The butler turned to Winter. "Good day to you, Miss Winter."

With that said the two butlers left with my stuff towards where I stayed.

I felt a tap on my shoulder and found Winter gesturing with her head towards another direction.

"Shall we?"

I smiled. "Let's."

We both took a stroll down the courtyard.

(Butler #1 POV)

I simply pushed the cart along as my coworker followed.

"Who do you think that man with Miss Winter was?" he asked.

I shrugged. "I'm not sure. Perhaps Mr. Remington may be her fiancé for all we know."

My coworker bit his lip. "If that's true, then I'm not sure how her father would react…or Weiss, for that matter."

I shook my head. "We're only guessing here. It's not like they are seeing each other."

My coworker shrugged. "I suppose. In any case, Winter can do better."

I chuckled. "Perhaps…but love works in mysterious ways."

(My POV)

Winter and I strolled down the stonewalk, simply enjoying the peace and quiet. I didn't know what to say to her, so I simply settled for looking around the school grounds….

I know that I've seen it in the show and during my time here before the semester, I can't help but marvel at the way this school was built.

The architecture, the designs…simply awe-inspiring.

"So."

I jumped a bit, turning to Winter. "Yeah?"

She turned her gaze at me. "How have you been?"

…These past two years? Or recently?

I sighed. "Things…could be better…different."

Winter frowned. "I see…."

She turned to face forward as silence reigned.

…

…

"My village is gone."

The words were out of my mouth before I could even think about saying them.

Winter's frowned deepened. "I know."

"You do?"

"Indeed. I was given a file on everyone under my command here at Beacon…you included."

I scoffed. Of course, something like that wouldn't be kept out of a file meant to hold every single detail about a person….

Wait a minute.

"I have my own file?"

"Indeed."

Huh…I don't know whether to be elated or terrified about that.

She gave me a concerned look. "Are you alright?"

"…I could be better."

Like I've said before, I'm not sure if I'll ever get over it.

"And Vert?"

I sighed. "Vert knew them all longer than me, but he's holding up alright, I suppose. Guess his long Huntsman career will do that to a person."

"…And Violet?"

…

…

"She may be a kid, but she understands what happened. And…she took it pretty hard, but she's doing better than I am, surprisingly."

I turned to Winter. "Did that file say anything about why my village is gone?"

"Officially, the cause is labeled as a Grimm attack that had followed that of the White Fang and three unknown assailants."

Unknown, my ass.

Still, at least they got it right for the most part.

"I don't suppose you were told why the White Fang and those three 'unknown' assailants attacked my village?"

Winter remained silent.

"Let me guess: A stranger, me, crossed those three assailants and earned enough of their ire to retaliate with aid from the White Fang."

She was still silent.

"I understand if it's classified, but I don't see the point in keeping it from me when I already know."

Silence continued to reign.

…

…

I sighed. "Do you think it was my fault?"

That broke Winter's silence. "What?"

"You heard me."

Winter pressed her lips together in a thin line as she thought out a response….

"Some decisions made can lead to good fortune. Other times…not so much."

She turned to me. "Tell me, what brought you to intervene on Amber's behalf?"

Good to know she knows about Amber…but whether she knows everything about Amber is another matter entirely.

I pursed my lips. "That's easy. I knew what would happen if those three (partially) succeeded. Amber would be in a coma, and those three would be one step closer to bringing down Beacon and nearly destroying Vale."

Winter nodded. "You did what you had to do to ensure that didn't happen."

Considering how Cinder still managed to work out a deal with the White Fang, I'd say it could still somehow happen. I mean, she was intending to recruit the White Fang to her cause before she had any of Amber's power, so her plan could still be in effect.

"Yeah…though now I realize I should've thought it more through."

"Even if you realized what would result of your intervention, would you have done nothing?"

"…No, but that doesn't mean I like what happened afterwards."

Winter frowned. "Every action has a consequence, Colt. It is simply a matter of who is on the receiving end of that consequence. Either one or both sides are negatively affected by one side's actions."

That…goddamn it, that actually makes sense.

I grunted. "I guess…."

I don't really wanna talk about this anymore, so I racked my brain for a change in subject…and found one.

"So," I said. "I don't suppose there was anything else in that file that might've been surprising to hear about me?"

Winter frowned.

"Something about me giving an explanation concerning how I knew to involve myself?"

Her frown deepened.

"An explanation that was…out of this world?"

Now she looked at me, giving me an unamused glare, which told me all I needed to know.

I smirked. "I thought that would've made it into a file about me."

I begin to walk backwards so that I faced Winter.

"So, what are your thoughts on that particular subject?"

"I don't seem to recall confirming your suspicion."

"And I don't seem to recall you denying it either."

"…"

I chuckled. "Come on…indulge me, a little?"

…

…

"It's funny," she commented. "I never pegged you for the crazy type."

Good to know what her stance is on the matter.

I laughed. "Well, I'm not. But, I guess you can't really take my word for it unless I give you definitive proof."

Winter scoffed. "You actually think you can back up your ludicrous claim?"

"I can, and I will. Besides, I think I'm close to convincing Ozpin and the others with what I've done so far."

Roman's Dust robbery, Ruby intervening, Roman having backup (even though it was someone else), repeating along with what Ozpin and Ruby were saying to each other at the station…hell, if Initiation goes as planned, then there's no way they can keep disbelieving me.

And even if they still don't believe me, then there's still plenty of other events (that are least likely to have changed) I can throw at them until they finally do.

"I find it doubtful that you can convince Ozpin of all people. While General Ironwood has said Ozpin can be more open-minded than reality dictates, he is still a man of logic."

…Yeah, legends turning out to be true pretty much throw logic out the window.

I shrugged. "Eh, I think I can make a convincing case. Besides, it's not like they're not wary of me. I'm here at Beacon for more than guarding Amber, after all."

It makes sense when you think about it. Some wild card they aren't sure of suddenly popping up? They'd want to keep a close eye on that wild card. Hell, considering Ironwood is a part of all this yet stuck in Atlas, I wouldn't be surprised if he somehow found a way to keep an eye on me.

Not that I blame him. I mean, Amber had a close call, and while he trusts Ozpin at this point in time, he'd probably be able to rest better if someone he knew was sent here to be his eyes and ears should something happen.

If he did, I think it would more than likely be one of his Specialists.

…

…

Wait a minute….

Goddamn it.

"Winter."

"Yes?"

"I'm just gonna come out and ask…did Ironwood send you to keep an eye on me?"

…

…

Winter's silence spoke volumes.

I sighed. "Figures."

In all honesty, I probably should've known something was up with Winter being here as head of security. I mean, Ozpin could've gotten someone within Vale. Instead, Winter's here….

Not that I mind, really.

Winter turned to me with a small frown. "If it bothers you so much, then I apologize, but-."

"Oh it doesn't bother me that much."

She looked confused. "Really now?"

"Yeah, I just…should've realized it sooner, I guess."

I grinned. "Besides, jokes on him since you being here isn't really a down in my book. If anything, I'm glad it was you and not some other military person."

"…O-Oh."

I turn at her stutter. "You alright, Winter?"

She quickly shook her head. "Y-Yes, I'm fine."

She cleared my throat. "Back to the subject, I can't help but find it rather disturbing that you figured out why I'm here."

"I blame television and the film industry."

"…What?"

"That's what happens when you pay so much attention to the big and small screen. It opens the mind to many possibilities and makes your imagination run wild."

She deadpanned. "I'm certain it rots the brain."

I shrugged. "In some cases, yes. Others…it makes you really think about stuff you never thought of before. Stuff that could possibly happen or not."

"That's called being paranoid."

"Stop trying to debunk my logic."

"I'm not. I'm simply using real logic and common sense to show how your way of thinking is false."

"…That is literally the definition of debunking."

"I know," she smirked.

…Goddamn it.

I sighed. "Whatever. My logic is sound to a degree, and I intend to prove my claim to you and everyone else. Besides, three people believe me already, so I guess I can wait until others do too."

Now she was confused. "You…actually convinced three people of your ludicrous claim?"

"Yep. First, there's Violet-."

"Isn't she still a child?"

"Eight, to be exact, but that's not the point."

"It is if her believing you is chalked up to a child's imagination."

"…You got me there. But then there's Vert and-."

"He believes you?"

I looked at her to find her with a disbelieving look on her face.

"He does…why?"

"It's just…I'd have thought he'd have more sense than that. Then again, I suppose one's mind does wither with age."

I shrugged. "I'd like to think of it as more because of the bond between master and student. Also-."

I paused both mid-sentence and mid-step.

"…Wait a minute."

I slowly turned towards Winter. "Did…you just call Vert senile?"

…

…

Winter's eyes widened as she paled.

She waved her hands. "W-Wait, that's not what I meant!"

"Kinda sounded like that's what you meant."

"N-No! I was…s-simply suggesting that maybe his age was at last catching up to him."

"…So now he's senile and old."

Hints of an embarrassed blush were evident on her cheeks.

"S-Stop taking my words out of context!"

"I'm pretty sure your words are clear and concise in their meaning."

The embarrassed blush grew, but she took a few deep breaths to make it go away.

"…I kindly ask that you not repeat what I've said to Vert."

I pursed my lips. "…Okay."

"Thank you. Now the- who are you calling?"

I had already pulled my Scroll out, immediately searched my contacts, and selected Vert, calling him. I made sure to put it on speaker.

Winter gave me a dark look. "Colt-."

"Hello?"

Winter paled a bit.

I grinned. "Heeeeeeyyyyyy, Vert."

Vert sighed. "What is it, Colt?"

"Oh nothing, just…there's this person here that called you a senile old man."

"…WWWWHHHAAAATT?!"

I think the very earth we stood on shook at the shout.

Winter paled even more. She probably felt very small right about now.

"WHO SAID IT?! WHERE IS THIS PERSON?! I'LL TEACH HIM/HER TO RESPECT THEIR ELDERS!"

I smirked. "Funny thing, actually. She's right here next to me."

Winter was now a deathly white.

"PUT HER ON THE SCROLL! No wait, stay where you are! I'll track your location and END HER!"

"…Is that really necessary?"

"YES! Now, so long as your Scroll is intact, I should be there in-."

I never got to finish hearing what Vert was gonna say, because the oddest thing just happened.

Winter slapped the Scroll out of my hand. It landed on the ground with a crack, but it was still intact….

Winter's heel had something to say about that.

CRACK!

And there goes my Scroll.

What's more, Winter stomped on it a couple more times, just to be sure the apparently offending device was destroyed.

Winter breathed a sigh of relief. "Thank heavens."

…

…

She then gasped and covered her mouth, her eyes widening as her brain finally processed what she just did.

She almost robotically turned to gauge my expression….

It must've been something if her concerned look was anything to go by.

"C-Colt?"

I couldn't answer her at the moment…my own brain was trying to process what just happened.

Did…did she just break my Scroll to "ensure her survival"?

I…um…huh.

…

…

Well, obviously I need to give the appropriate response to what I just witnessed.

I took a deep breath-.

(Ozpin POV)

I blinked in regular intervals in order to process what just happened.

…

…

That was…rather unbecoming of a Specialist.

Sure, she was in danger of being killed by the most dangerous predator of all: Vert Bowman. However, did she really have to-.

On second thought, she was completely justified.

Just as Qrow is completely justified in kneeling in a begging position right next to me.

"Oz, I will owe you so many favors if you send that footage to my Scroll!"

Hmm, now that's quite the deal.

Having Qrow owe me several favors he won't say no to, all for a copy of the security footage….

"Seven favors."

"Three."

"I'm sorry. Didn't you say you'd owe me so many favors?"

"…Five."

"Six."

"Five and a half."

"How would that even work?"

"…Four."

"You just went down."

"…I'm a haggler?"

I closed my eyes. "…Five."

"Three."

I glared at him.

"Fine, fine. Five."

Heh, sucker. Now I have someone to keep an eye on the first years tonight to ensure they don't try anything. I had asked Vert to do it, thinking he'd agree immediately.

Instead, he refuses, saying he "won't play babysitter to a bunch of brats."

I pointed out Violet, only to get a death glare from the retired Huntsman and a threat of extreme bodily pain if I ever compared his honorary granddaughter to the "brats" again.

That was never my intention, but I wisely chose to keep my mouth shut.

Qrow quickly stood up with a grin. "Thanks, Oz. I'm so holding this over Ice Queen's and Jimmy's head for the rest of their lives."

"That's assuming you outlive either of them."

"…I stand by what I said."

Funny.

I chuckled. "Well, I suppose now we should tune in to Colt's respo-."

"PFHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA-!"

"…Damn, I was hoping to see him rage."

"Ditto."

(Winter POV)

"PFHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA-!"

I gawked at the man rolling on the ground, laughing uncontrollably.

"D-Don't laugh!"

Was he actually angry but trying to laugh it away?

He tried to control himself. "Y-You broke my scroll out of fear?!"

"I-I was in danger!"

Vert Bowman was known to not be merciful to those on his...ahem, "shit list".

And from what was said before he left the Kingdom, anyone who made note of Vert's age would receive a rather…painful punishment.

I-I couldn't suffer through that! I-I was justified in what I did!

Colt continued to laugh. "Y-You just did it without hesitation!"

"I was completely justified!"

"O-Oh? Just like I was j-justified in destroying those Knights?"

"T-That's completely different!"

He managed to calm down somewhat. "I-I don't see the difference."

He smirked. "Unless you're willing to say Atlas machinery can't compare to Vert?"

…Crapbaskets.

"T-They can."

"You stuttered."

I cleared my throat. "They can."

Vert may be one of the greatest Huntsman in history, but let's see him take on an Atlesian Paladin once it comes out next year.

Colt shrugged. "Oh well…still doesn't change the fact you destroyed my Scroll."

"Didn't you just destroy Atlas military property?"

"You destroyed my Scroll for a (somewhat) ridiculous reason. I destroyed those robots in self-defense."

I smirked. "A Scroll does not compare to Atlas military property."

He opened his mouth to retort…then deadpanned.

"I'm not gonna get anything over you, am I?"

"Not a chance."

He growled and looked everywhere but at me….

He stopped in a certain direction and grinned.

"Well, at least I know there's a record of it somewhere."

Huh?

I turned to where he was looking and found…a camera.

…

…

I quickly marched towards the Headmaster's office. "As head of security, I'll need to review all footage of today to ensure no suspicious characters have snuck into Beacon."

And maybe destroy any evidence of my little episode.

I could hear Colt catching up to me…then saw him pass me and keep running…towards the Headmaster's office.

…

…

Wait a minute-.

"Colt!"

I immediately conjured a glyph beneath him, causing him to trip and fall on his face.

"Ow!"

Letting out a grunt, I marched forward towards the down man.

"And just where were you running off to?"

He lifted his face and rubbed his nose. "N-Nowhere! Just, um…remembered I need to ask Ozpin something! Yeah…."

…Hmph, right.

I walked forward. "Well, perhaps you won't mind me visiting him first, then? I'm sure you can wait for me."

"…Um, Winter? The Glyph?"

"I'm sure you can wait for me."

"…LET ME OUT OF HERE!"

I could hear him trying to get out of the Glyph, not that he will, but it was quite funny hearing him grunt like that.

I chuckled. "Struggle all you want. You won't be getting out."

"…Are you sure about that?"

I scoffed and turned. "Yes, I am-."

I stopped and widened my eyes when I saw he was no longer in the Glyph.

In fact, he was nowhere to be seen.

W-When did he-?

I dispatched the Glyph now that it was reduced to a waste of energy.

I looked around, searching for any sign of the man.

He can't have just disappeared into thin air like…oh.

His file made mention of something like that.

His Semblance.

Invisibility.

…

…

"COLT!"

(Amber POV)

Violet let her legs swing beneath the chair as I brushed her hair.

"Daddy's supposed to be back soon, right?"

I nodded. "He is."

She bounced in her seat. "I can't wait to see what new clothes he got! Maybe he can finally get a special someone…."

She tilted her head upward to face me. "Someone like you."

I blushed. "L-Let's not talk about that again."

"No, we're talking about it again."

She shifted in her seat to face me. "I may be seven, but even I can see that you like my Daddy."

"W-What makes you say that?"

Violet deadpanned. "You don't exactly hide it, Amber."

S-She doesn't know what she's talking about.

"The longing looks you give him, how you make sure you're up close to him when you spar, and I'm pretty sure you tried to grab his hand more than one time."

…Damn it, she knows what she's talking about.

How old is she, again?

I sighed. "I can't really help it. He's going out of his way to protect me, even risking his own life. Not to mention making a few enemies as a result."

I smiled. "He said it was to prevent a disaster…but now he wants me to have my own life."

I blushed a fain pink. "A-And if he can be a part of that life…then it would be better."

I shook my head and looked back to Violet, who was shaking in her seat.

…

…

"Eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!"

I winced a bit at her squeal.

"This is great! You're only the second person to show any interest in Daddy!"

"Well thanks, but-."

I paused. "…Wait, second?"

Violet nodded. "Yeah, there's this nice girl named Coco, a friend of my older sister. She showed interest big time when she and my Daddy met last year."

My eye twitched. "…And what is this Coco like?"

"She's pretty, likes clothes, and is…'relentless', as Daddy put it. Also, she's young."

My eye twitched some more. "And how young is she?"

"According to her, she should be 18 by now."

SNAP!

Violet pointed at the ground. "You broke the brush."

"Yes, I can see that."

"…Should I get another-?"

She stopped suddenly, her ear twitching.

Her pause brought me out of my angered state. "Violet?"

"…Daddy did something stupid again."

"What makes you say-?"

"COLT!"

"…Never mind."

Violet sighed. "And here Daddy always says a man should never make a woman angry. This makes him a hippocrete."

"Hypocrite."

"That too."

Violet scratched her head. "It's weird, though. That shout sounded a lot like Win-."

KNOCK! KNOCK! KNOCK!

Huh. Is Colt back already? Wait, if Violet's right and he made a person angry just now, then he would be somewhere else at the moment.

Violet rushed towards the door and opened it.

"Yes?"

"Ah, hello little one!" came a polite voice. "We were asked by Miss Winter to bring Mr. Remington's items to this room."

"Daddy's stuf- wait, Winter's here?!"

"I take it you know her?"

Violet nodded rapidly. "Yup! She crashed at our former home outside the Kingdom some time ago."

"…I see."

Two butlers pushed a cart full of bags into the room and- wow, that's a lot of stuff.

The older butler bowed. "Pleasure to have met the two of you, but we must now take our leave."

The two butlers left the room.

"Bye!" Violet waved.

She bounced. "Oh my gosh! Winter's here! I haven't seen her in forever!"

I suddenly had a bad feeling about Winter.

"Right…you two met Winter before."

"She crashed near our former home! Some meanies in the White Fang tried to get her, but Daddy came to the rescue! He, she, and Vert showed those meanies a thing or two!"

Violet sighed. "Daddy missed out so many times, but now he has a chance to make up for it!"

Violet got some paper and crayons. "Time for some planning!"

She began to draw something.

I faltered. "P-Planning?"

"Yeah! You and Winter are here, and Coco and my sister will be here as well. And Daddy apparently ran into the ice cream girl we met a year before Winter. So many missed opportunities, but now he has a second chance!"

I shakily rose a finger. "I-I don't suppose I'm included in the group?"

"Well, duh!"

Oh thank god.

"But now you need to step up! Daddy apparently 'had fun' with the ice cream lady-."

My eye twitched.

"And Daddy apparently punched the mean Huntsman in Winter's honor-."

I quickly pulled out my Scroll to look up a picture of Winter Schnee and….oh.

I suddenly felt discouraged.

"And Daddy said Coco is relentless, someone who doesn't give up easy, so maybe she might wear him down-."

I slowly shook in anger.

"And Velvet…well, Vert says there's technically nothing wrong with her and Daddy getting together. That would make her my sister and my mother! Wait, what about my real mommy? Is she still my mommy? Would she be considered my grandma? Or maybe I'll have two mommies at the same time? So confusing! I need to ask Daddy about this."

I growled lowly.

"There was also that mysterious lady, but Daddy looked more serious when he said no, so she probably won't make the cut."

Good. The last thing I need is more women after Colt.

"Just like he was serious about saying no when I brought up having five mommies."

SNAP!

Damn it. Now I need a new Scroll.

(Butler #1 POV)

My coworker and I moved along towards the airship so that we could return to the Schnee estate.

"You caught what the little one said, right?"

I raised an eyebrow. "Which part?"

"Both."

I hummed.

Yes…the man had a Faunus child, and both were from outside the Kingdom.

My coworker huffed. "Now I'm more sure than ever that Miss Winter can do better. I imagine Mr. Remington used to be a farmer or something if he lived outside the Kingdom. Possibly even a bandit."

"I'm pretty sure it's the former and not the latter."

"Still…imagine what would happen if word got out?"

Ah yes. A Schnee (possibly) getting engaged to a farmer who had a Faunus child.

The media would have a field day this.

"Should we bother to inform Weiss?"

I shook my head. "No, young Weiss will learn of this herself at some point."

"…I suppose."

My coworker turned to me. "And Mr. Schnee?"

…That seems like a terrible idea.

"Would you really wish that man's wrath upon the Mr. Remington and his daughter?

He shrugged. "If he has an interest in Miss Winter, then he should be prepared to deal with her father."

"…You're going to tell Mr. Schnee, aren't you?"

"Of course. I'll obviously say it in a way that won't come back to bite me."

I deadpanned. "Right…I forgot about your trait of finding amusement in other people's misery, Clint."

Clint Fitzroy grinned. "What can I say? Seeing people screwed over is amusing to me. You know this too well, Mr. Sinclair."

"Reginald."

"Of course."

I sighed.

I pitied Mr. Remington and his daughter.

They were going to be hit by the mother (or in this case, father, though I have no doubt Mrs. Schnee may have something to say about this) of all snowstorms.

"It would be more amusing if they were actually together, but I don't see it happening."

I chucked. "As I said before…love works in mysterious ways."

A/N: Yes. Yes it does.

Well, Winter and I got to have a nice long chat, huh? And of course she doesn't believe me. How can anyone? Vert and Violet were the exceptions, and I already proved it to Amber. As for the rest of the Ozluminati…they're sort of coming around but still need convincing.

And now Winter and I race to get a copy of the footage of her acting out of character: one to delete, the other to finally get one over her, though we've yet to find out about Qrow….

I'm not sure whether I should laugh or be angry that Qrow has it.

And wow, Amber's a bit angry, huh? Hope you Guardian shippers liked that. Same goes to the Cold Steel shippers with me and Winter in this chapter.

And Mr. Schnee will find out…fuck.

I wanted to add more to the chapter, but I felt that it's been long enough without an update as it is, and it felt right to end it here and leave the race for footage for the next chapter.

Virtual cookies to anyone who can guess where the two butlers came from.

Anyway, it was nice to talk to Winter in this chapter.

Violet: Does this mean you're going the Winter route?

What? No! It's still too soon for a pairing! Also…I still haven't decided on it yet.

Violet: WHAT?!

I-It's not an easy decision to make!

Violet: YOU NEED TO MAKE UP YOUR MIND ALREADY! I WANT A MOMMY!

T-These things take time and- OW!

Violet: RESPECT MY AUTHORITAH!

OW! STOP HITTING ME WITH THAT BATON!

Violet: NEVER!

Ow! Damn it!

Violet: SWEAR!

Ugh, just…enjoy the goddamn omake while I deal with the little squirt he- OW!

Violet: RESPECT THE SWEAR JAR!

Omake: Shots in the Dark

(Some time in the future)

I was beaten to a pulp and dragged by two people I knew nothing about.

One was some psycho guy named Tyrian, and another was a big guy named Hazel.

Who'd have thought that Salem had more agents?

Not me, apparently.

They dragged me though some double doors and sat me on a chair.

"Is this him?" a familiar voice called out.

"Yes, milady, hehehe," Tyrian laughed crazily.

"Hmph…leave us."

The two bowed and quickly left the chamber, closing the doors.

I slowly lifted my head towards the source of the familiar voice.

Salem.

She stared at me with a tilted head. "So you're the one who has interfered in my plans?"

I spit out some blood.

She chuckled. "And look at what your interfering has resulted in. Your body beaten and broken…and at my mercy."

I glared halfheartedly at her, mainly because it would've hurt if I used a full glare.

She strode towards me, almost as though she were floating.

She glared down at me. "Did you really think a simple man such as yourself could stop me?"

I chewed on the inside of my mouth…then spit out some blood on her cheek.

She closed her eyes and sighed….

POW!

She backhanded me with authority.

I fell to the ground, my body unable to move due to the pain I had endured.

Salem moved towards the double doors and locked them.

I coughed and tried to move, but my body refused my command.

Salem stood over me and wiped the blood off her cheek.

"You know…the reason Cinder became what she had was due to the Grimm blood that infected her."

Yeah, I know that much.

"…But she was not the first."

…What?

"In fact," Salem continued as little hearts formed in her pupils. "The first was me."

I paled.

"Ozpin always found a way to evade my advances, denying me what I wanted from him…love."

I paled even more.

"And perhaps a round or two in bed with him."

I was now pale white like Ruby.

She removed the bands in her hair, letting it flow freely. "But now…I have a replacement."

I was now a deathly white.

She giggled. "Oh look! Now we have matching skin tone. A match made in the heavens."

More like hell!

GET ME AWAY FROM THIS WOMAN!

I managed to summon enough strength to attempt a crawl, but she stomped on my ankle, breaking it.

"AAAAAAAAAAGGGHH!"

She grinned. "Yes, scream some more!"

She grinded her foot on my broken ankle.

"AGH! S-STOP, YOU PSYCHO!"

She lifted her foot off my broken ankle, allowing some form of relief.

She lowered herself towards me and caressed my cheek.

"Now," she said in a sultry tone and hearts in her eyes. "Let's have some fun~."

A/N: …

…

…

You know what? No. I'll just leave the rest to your imagination.

But, there you go. The only time Shots in the Dark will ever be a thing. Will I do this for the other joke pairings (harem included) not likely to happen? Maybe.

I can already imagine Salem moving up in the poll because of this omake…oh well.

Seeing as finals are next week, I'll be pretty busy, but…I think I can squeeze one more chapter before then, but don't hold me to it.

If you liked this and want to be kept up to date, be sure to follow and fav. Leave a review to tell me your thoughts.

See you in the next update.

LATERS!