I own nothing. All characters/storylines belong to Shonda. I'm simply 'borrowing' them.

Chapter Twenty-Five

ARIZONA'S POV

I've never known silence like this. Eliza is sitting in front of me, and I feel like my world is about to crumble around me. Her eyes searching my face, I don't know what it is she is looking for. I'm not going to lie about something like that. I'm not going to make a joke like that. Why would I? I guess it could be pretty unbelievable, though. I want her to say something. No, I need her to say something. I just don't know what. I mean, what exactly do you say to the woman who has just paid your mom to leave town? Thanks? Why? Fuck you? I really don't know what is about to happen, but I feel like I'm on the outside looking in. Standing from the bed, I grab a hoodie that is folded on the window seat and shrug it on. "I, uh…I'll leave you alone." Giving her one final look, her eyes once again find mine, but she doesn't say anything.

I can't quite make out what that look means, but I don't like it. Was I stupid to do what I did? Eliza already struggles with the money side of my life, so yeah…I think it was pretty damn stupid to pay her mom to leave. Will I ever learn that money doesn't always solve problems? Will I? Judging by the mess I've made right now, I'm going to say that it's a hard no. "I'll see you later." I sigh. "I love you…"

"Where are you going?" She asks, her voice barely above a whisper. It's a heartbreaking sound, but I don't know what else to do right now.

"Just…out."

"Why?" She snorts. "You paid for me, so now you have to deal with me…"

"Eliza, please don't say that." My heart crumbling in my chest, I've never felt so hurt by somebody's words before. I know she is probably angry right now, but I thought I was doing the right thing. I thought I was making this easier for her. "I just wanted to give you some space."

"Mm, space." She nods. "I don't think I need space…I think you need a refund."

"Please, don't." Moving towards the entrance of our bedroom, I pull my hoodie tighter around me. "I'll just hang down in the lobby for a little while." Thank God that place has a bar. Thank God I can at least drown my mistakes while she decides if she even wants to be with me anymore. I could hear that uncertainty in her voice just now. When she suggested that I paid for her, I could hear the disgust in her voice.

Grabbing my cell from the kitchen counter, I glance around for my key and find Eliza standing behind me. Startled, I place my hand over my chest and she furrows her brow. "What? Did you really think I was going to let you leave and not talk this through with me?"

"I don't know…" I breathe out. "I just don't know what you want me to do right now."

"I want you to explain why the hell you thought it was appropriate to pay my mom off." Her eyebrow raised, it isn't in jest. This is anything but funny. "Well?"

"I'm not talking about it while you are like this." Shaking my head, I grab my key card and move towards the door. "I don't want to fight with you…"

"Don't you dare walk away from me, Arizona." Her words stopping me in my tracks, my shoulders slump and I turn back to find complete disappointment written all over her beautiful face. "You created this mess, so you can damn well explain yourself."

"I-I created this mess?" I counter. "How exactly did I do that? By loving you? By wanting you to be happy? Tell me, Eliza, how the hell did I create this mess? It's not my fault your mom won't allow this. It's not my fault that she is a vile person." My voice raised, she is a little taken back by my tone, but I don't regret it. If I did, it would mean she was right, and in this moment…she is totally out of line. "You just don't get it, do you? How much I love you…how much I want to spend the rest of my life with you." Laughing, I shake my head and throw my keys down on the table beside the door. "You think that this is all about you, but it's not, Eliza. You forget that your mom insulted me, called me a monster and an animal…basically accused me of holding you against your will and taking advantage of you… Do you have any idea how that makes me feel? Do you have any idea how awful I feel just for simply loving you? You know…I could have walked away weeks ago. I could have kicked you to the gutter and let you go…but I didn't."

"If you think that you could have done that, why didn't you?"

"Because I love you!" Now screaming at each other, this conversation is going nowhere. I'm not doing this right now. I'm not explaining myself when I've done nothing wrong. Not really. So I gave her mom some cash, big fucking deal. If it gets her out of my life, I'd do it ten times over. "Don't bother following me. At least, not until you realize that I'm in this too. Not until you realize that you aren't the only one who is hurt by your mom's actions. I did what I did because I love you. Make of that what you will. I don't care anymore." Picking up my key, I head out onto my private landing and slam the heavy metal door shut. I've never raised my voice to anyone like that before, but this isn't fair to me. Yes, I paid her mom off, but I didn't do it for the fun of it. I did it because I believed it was the right thing to do.

Waking to the bright autumn New York sun streaming through my window, I glance around and my head pounds. Last night I drank the bar dry down in the lobby, and this morning I don't feel so good. Eliza called me multiple times last night, but I wasn't feeling that mood. I just wanted to sit with my own thoughts and drink the night away…so I did. It must have been near to 2 am when I came back up to my condo, and she was already in bed and sleeping. I'd thought about waking her, but I could barely hold myself up never mind a conversation. It just wasn't happening last night.

Swinging my legs over the edge of the couch, I throw the blanket from my body and stand. Ugh! I hate that feeling. My body swaying a little, I'm pretty sure I'm still drunk. Glancing at the clock, it's a little after 8 am, so yeah, I'm still drunk. I can hear running water so I know Eliza is awake and preparing for the day ahead, but I decide against joining her in the shower. We aren't in that good place right now, and sex will not fix this. I'm not sure what is going to fix this if I'm being completely honest. My cell buzzing against the coffee table, I glance down and find my moms name on the screen.

Planning to fly in a few days early. Wanting to catch up with my beautiful daughter…

Hey, mom. Could you give me a day or so? You know I can't wait to see you, but Eliza has some stuff going on right now and I'm not sure how much fun either of us will be. Xx

No problem. Everything okay? Mom x

Honestly, I don't know. I'll call you tomorrow. Xx

You know where I am if you need me. I love you, Arizona. Mom x

I love you, too. Xx

Smiling at my cell, I don't hear Eliza approaching me from the other end of the hallway. Setting it down, I glance up and she is leaning against the frame of the corridor. "Wasn't sure you'd even come home last night."

"Needed some time to myself." I shrug. Rounding the kitchen counter, I power up the coffee machine and the aroma relaxes me a little. Just a little coffee and I'll be good to go. I know I went through at least two bottles of wine last night, and I'm pretty sure I had a good go at the very expensive scotch whilst I was at it. I feel disgusting, but I needed the blown out. I needed the pity party alone to allow my anger time to subside. "Did you want coffee, or?"

"If you're making some, yeah." Closing the distance between us a little, her elbows rest on the kitchen island and she watches my every move. I'm definitely a little unsteady on my feet this morning, but it's been a while since I've given the alcohol a good go. Sometimes it's just needed…even if it doesn't solve any of my problems. "Where did you go last night?"

"I told you I would be down in the lobby bar." I give her a raised eyebrow and she drops her gaze. "What? Did you think I was out buying another young brunette?" That was harsh. Regretting the words as soon as they leave my mouth, I sigh and run my fingers through my hair. "I'm sorry."

"No, I deserved that." She admits. "I just…I don't like what you did, Arizona. I don't like it at all."

"And I don't like your mother, so I guess we are even."

"Look, can we stop with the short smart ass comments and talk this out? Please…"

"Okay." Giving her a nod, I hand her a cup of coffee and she moves towards the spot I've just spent the night sleeping on. The couch. I swear this couch is soon going to become a place for therapy. "I don't like how you spoke to me last night, Eliza. That wasn't fair. I already feel terrible for what I did, and then you go and suggest that I paid your mom to have you to myself…that's not what I was doing."

"I know." She sighs. "I just…why did you do it? Why did you give her money?"

"Because she had made it perfectly clear that she wasn't going to go for this. She was never going to agree with us or our relationship." Her mother's words going around and around in my head, I have to hold back my emotions. "The second I pulled out that cheque, Eliza, I knew how she really felt. I knew she would never welcome you as you are. I asked her. I begged her. It wasn't my intention to go there and beg and plead with her, but I did. I mean, I wasn't on my hands and knees in front of her, but I didn't go there like a bat out of hell, either."

"I just feel like you've bought me. I feel like my mother has just sold me to you…"

"Hey…" Taking her hand in my own, she drops her gaze and toys with my fingertips. "That's isn't how I felt about it. I just wanted her away from you. I mean, if you feel you need to go and see her, or speak to her, do it…but she told me to leave you, Eliza. She told me to tell you that I didn't want you."

"How much?" She asks.

"How much what?" I know what she is asking, but I'm trying to stall right now.

"How much am I worth?" My heart breaking as those words fall from her mouth, I wipe away the tears that are falling from my eyes and shake my head.

"It wasn't like that, Eliza, and how much I gave her doesn't matter."

"It matters to me." She spits. "I want to know how much my mother would sell me off for. Well, not would, but did."

"Please stop saying that. I cannot sit here and listen to you saying that. I didn't buy you, and I certainly didn't accept her offer to sell you to me. I asked her how much to leave you alone. That is totally different…"

"You may see it that way, but I don't. However you dress it up, Arizona, my mom still accepted payment from you to get me out of her life. That fucking hurts…" She sighs. "Whether I hate her or not, it's irrelevant."

"Fifty…" I sigh.

"I hope to god that you are talking fifty bucks right now."

"No." My eyes searching her face she cannot even look at me. "I know you're hurting, and I understand why, but please believe me when I say that how it seems to you, is never how I intended it to be. Can you please just forget it ever happened? I don't want to do this anymore with you, Eliza. I don't want to fight about it. You were so happy last night when I told you that she had left New York, can you not just be happy again and we can move forward?"

"I just...yeah, I get it." She agrees. "Just don't ever do anything like that again, okay? I appreciate that you were only doing what you thought was best, but I'm sure there would have been another way."

"You think?" I scoff. "I've only known your mother for what?! A few days…and even I know that she would have come back repeatedly."

"Yeah...I guess you're right."

"I did thank her, though." Smiling, I place my coffee cup down and pull her a little closer to me. "For bringing you into my life."

"Oh, I bet that went down well." Her arms wrapping around my waist, she settles between my legs and I place a kiss on top of her damp hair.

"She didn't care what I had to say at that point. She already had the cheque in her hand by then."

"You know, there is still time to have the cheque canceled." I appreciate her suggestion but it's not necessary. That money will not be missed, and if it keeps her mom out of our lives, that is good enough for me.

"I think I'd sooner she took the money, Eliza."

"She won't even know what to do with it." She laughs that infectious laugh and it sends a shiver down my spine. "Maybe having it will prevent her from being a cold-hearted bitch for five minutes."

"Maybe." I shrug. "You no longer have to worry about her, so what do you say that we head out tonight for one super fancy dinner and I show you off to the world?"

"You want to show me off?" She laughs. "Really?"

"Damn right I do." Leaving no room for argument, she lifts her head a little and drops light kisses along my jawline. "I mean, have you actually seen you?"

"Um…"

"Just say yes, Eliza." Rolling my eyes, she gives me a genuine smile and I know that she is slowly coming to terms with what I did yesterday. I know she is feeling hurt and I know that she is feeling unwanted, but now where I'm concerned. I'll never not want her. I just hope that she knows that. "Well?"

"Yes, Arizona. Dinner would be amazing."

"Good. There is a new dress in the closet for you."

Giving me a raised eyebrow, I simply shrug. "Arizona…" She breathes out. "I know that you are hurt, too. I know that you are in this with me and that my mother's actions hurt you just as much as they hurt me. I also know that you were the one to bear the brunt of it while she was here, so thank you. Thank you for protecting me and taking care of me. Thank you for being the one who I officially come out with. It may not seem like a big deal to you, but to me, it means the absolute world. I don't ever want to be with anyone else, and I plan on showing you off tonight."

"Thank you for not holding it against me too much." I smile. "I just wanted to help you, Eliza. I'll always want to help you. If that meant doing what I did, I don't regret it. I know you don't like it, and I know that I unintentionally hurt you by doing it, but I still don't regret it. No amount of money in the world could ever compare to the love I have for you. I hope you know that. I'd have given her every dime I had if it meant she would leave you to enjoy your life…I would."

"I'm sorry I was so hard on you. I know you meant well."

"I knew the second I'd left her hotel that I'd messed up, but it was too late to take it back. It was too late to do anything other than come home to you." I state. "I still cannot believe you accused me of cheating, though. That was a low blow."

"I was an absolute mess last night, Arizona. Please forgive me?"

"Already have." Pulling her further up my body, her head rests against my chest and her heart beats against my own.

"Can we stay like this for a little while?" She asks. "Before we head to the office?"

"For a while?" I ask. "I don't plan on moving for the rest of the day. No office for us. I'm slowly dying and I need to sleep a little longer."

"Hangover?" She smirks.

"Maybe just a little one…"

"Well, you only have yourself to blame." Shaking my head at the lack of sympathy from my girlfriend, she is right. This could have been figured out last night, but I had to go and drink myself into oblivion. I had to go and leave her waiting for me to return home. Was it worth it? No.

Sleeping alone on the couch will NEVER be worth it…

Thanks for reading, guys. Reviews are welcome as always. Next chapter will be a little lighter. I can hear the sighs of relief from where I'm sitting….