Chapter 25

The Gourmand Way

It was a few hours before midnight in Alexandria and Garnet's birthday party was still underway. The band was still playing flawlessly; most of the people were still dancing, including Zidane and co. The music had returned to an upbeat tune. Everyone was lively, apart from Quina's rival, Queldo, King Harold Mayer and the suspicious Amarant Coral. The red-headed monk still watched Zidane with sharp eyes, still doubting that nothing major happened in his year of absence.

After an enjoyable dance with Garnet, Zidane grew tired at headed for his seat. "Sorry, Dagger. I'm knackered! I need to sit down." He said. Garnet, who was also out of breath, nodded in agreement, "Yeah. (Huff-Heave) I think I'll do the same." She said and went back to her chair with Cid and Hilda. "Hey, Zidane!" Garnet called to her friend. Zidane turned his head and faced her, "Thanks for that dance. I really needed it." She said in gratitude. "No problem. I think I had as much fun as you did." He answered, and then sat down.

He looked around and saw Vivi showing his son, Bibi, how to cast a few magic spells, with which he had difficulty in doing. "Ha ha! Kids wanna grow up so fast." He laughed, "Problem is, when they do, they wish they were kids again." He added. Zidane further scanned his surroundings and found Eiko talking to Freya about something that seemed girly. "Some things will never change...." he thought to himself with a friendly smile. He looked round and spotted Garnet talking to Cid and Hilda. She noticed Zidane and waved at him. And he waved back. Suddenly, a person's hand grabbed Zidane's shoulder, spun him round in his chair, and Zidane came face-to-face with Amarant. "Don't play dumb with me, Zidane! C'mon! Let's hear it!" he demanded. Zidane was surprised, "Erm... Hi. W-What are you talking about?" he asked, confused.

"You know what I'm talking about!" said Amarant in frustration. Zidane looked puzzled, "Uh...... No I don't." He informed the monk. "There's no way it would have taken you a week and three days to get here! I know that you're hiding something, Zidane! What were you up to in that space of time!? Tell me!" ordered Amarant. Zidane saw in his eyes that he knew and was dead serious. He looked around, cautiously, so that no one could hear them. ".... Alright, fine. You win Amarant. But I'm only telling you, understand? Don't tell any of the others." He pleaded. Amarant nodded, "As you wish." He said, letting the genome go from his grip. Zidane stood up and straightened his clothes. "Alright. I'll tell you everything: You're right. I would have been here far sooner than a day and three weeks. But when I woke up inside the Iifa Tree, not only was Kuja missing, but I got to Conde Petie and found out that all of the dwarves are dead." He explained. Amarants eyes widened, "What? All of them? Dead?" he checked. Zidane nodded, with a serious look on his face. "Why should I believe you?" asked Amarant. "Hey! You asked for the truth and that's what you're getting!" Zidane declared. "Okay..... Carry on." Said Amarant.

"Anyway: I went to Madain Sari and found one of Eiko's moogles as the only inhabitant. All the others were killed in an earth quake, sadly. So, we worked together and made the little boat that was in the harbour more durable for the oceans choppy waves. But he showed me something he found earlier: a meteorite that had hit Gaia a few miles away from Madain Sari." Informed Zidane. "A meteorite?" assured Amarant. "Yeah. But that wasn't all. After I inspected it, I came to the conclusion that something that was inside it was now on Gaia. And we found a maimed corpse outside the crater. And one other thing, I didn't think much of it at the time, but I saw a strange yellow glow coming from beneath the boat in the harbour. Anyway, sooner or later, I found out that whatever was inside the meteorite hadn't left, and it killed Chimomo in cold blood!" Zidane explained. "Chimomo?" asked Amarant. "Yeah. Eiko's moogle. So I tracked the killer down and found him in Qu's Marsh on the Outer Continent. Turned out that it had made itself look like the dead body that we found and, even freakier, it could use any of our techniques against me." Amarant's mouth gaped open, "But.... That's impossible! Any of us?" he asked. Zidane nodded.

"So after a ton of battles with this guy, who called himself Ares, I chased him in the boat when he fled into the sea. I ended up running into him in the middle of a storm. After fighting him, yet again, we both got swallowed up by a tsunami, and were washed up on a beach near Cleyra the next day. It seemed like a minute to me though." He claimed. "That's probably because you were light headed at the time. Being caught up in a tidal wave and surviving doesn't come without a catch, you know." Explained Amarant. "Anyway, I chased Ares to Cleyra where we fought and, thanks to Trance, I was able to finally beat him. No one's heard from him since. Well, that's about it, in a nutshell. Pretty crazy, right?" said Zidane. "That was an interesting story, I got one question though." He stated, "Go on." Said Zidane. "By the sounds of it, this Ares guy was as bad, if not, worse than Kuja was. Are you absolutely sure that you killed him?" he asked. "Well, I vaporized half of his body. No one could survive that. Could they?" He assured Amarant. "I've never heard of anyone doing so. Was he the one that killed all of the dwarves?" he asked. "Yeah. He turned his fingers into these tentacles of some weird goo-like stuff that absorbs other things. That's how he got them." Zidane replied.

Suddenly, Queldo approached them. "What you two dimwits whispering about?" he asked, harshly. The two of them glared at the Qu, "Hey, we don't want any trouble." Said Zidane. "Well, you got trouble if you friends with that insolent fool, Quina." s/he stated. "You obviously have no idea who you're messing with. Now get outta here before I rip you a new asshole!" threatened Amarant. Queldo glared at the monk, "You have big mouth! It would be shame if I had shut it!" s/he retaliated. "Are you challenging me, Queldo!?" yelled Amarant. "Challenge you? You not worth my time!" s/he insulted and walked off. "Man! That genderless thing is a complete jerk!" stated Zidane. "S/he no always been like that." A voice said behind them. The two bandits turned around and saw Quina. "Hey, Quina. We can see why you hate him/her." Said Zidane. "S/he used be my friend, long time ago. S/he changed for worse." Quina explained. "What happened between you two, anyway?" asked Amarant. "We from same tribe, but we used have different masters. We remained friends, keeping in touch, exchanging munchies and practice gourmand knowledge. There lots of Qu's back then, not many now. That because humans started understand ways of cooking lots good food. Not much need for gourmands. Because no one want Qu for cooking, we die out, lack of gil, no work. Qu's no could afford to survive, it odd. Queldo's master passed away, left him with nothing. My old master perish as well, but I lucky. Master Quale had choice between me or him/her and s/he picked me. It destroyed Queldo, s/he had nothing left. No family, no friends, no teacher. It as if goodness, itself, betray him/her and, then, Qu I knew as friend gone: another casualty. That why s/he no like me anymore." Quina explained.

Zidane was slightly shocked. "Geez, Quina..... What you and Queldo went through.... I had no idea." He said. "That why I no say anything. I no like draw attention to myself." Said Quina. "So now s/he's become this twisted Qu who doesn't like anything." Stated Amarant. "That not all. S/he pervert as well! I catch him/her looking at women. Observe." Explained Quina, pointing over at a table that Eiko, Beatrix, Freya and Ruby were sat at, and Queldo was approaching them.

"Ugh! That Queldo is such a nuisance! And I thought Quina was bad!" stated Eiko. "Don't fret, Eiko. We probably won't see him/her again after tonight. Just relax and ignore him/her." Advised Freya. Both of them looked down at the table when they saw the Qu approaching them. "So, where did Quina run off to?" s/he asked. "In the moat! Why don't you jump in a look for him/her!?" insulted Eiko. Queldo chuckled."S/he probably too ashamed to show his/her face around true gourmand." s/he said. "You're misinformed! I know that Quina can be loopy, but s/he has cooked much finer dishes that you have in the past." Stated Beatrix. "I know it hard being friends to that loser, but there no need to make up silly stories!" denied Queldo. The Qu's vision slowly dropped to her chest, "You no need stay with Quina. I could use girl like you." S/he remarked. "I'm not interested. Now leave!" she demanded. "I see by your posture that you upset. No worry, I know it tough. Quina is.... irregular, shall I put it? I give you much better time, general." Said Queldo. Beatrix stood up with irritation, "I can't believe I'm hearing this! You're staff! In fact, you're not even that! You were hired to cook, not mingle! Now get back to the kitchen before I lose my temper!" she yelled.

Queldo laughed, "I no can believe you yelling at me! It proves my power!" declared the Qu. Beatrix turned her back to him/her in disgust. Queldo turned his attention to Ruby, who was resting her eyes. The Qu peered down to try and get a peek down her cleavage. "Hey, lady! You awake or what?" s/he asked. Ruby didn't do anything. She sat resting her head on her arm with her eyes shut. Queldo continued to stare at her chest. "Mam? Hello?" s/he uttered. Ruby opened her eyes with an angry look, "Shut yer hole! What's a girl gotta do to get a moments peace!?" she yelled. Queldo grinned when Ruby leaned forward, as s/he gained a better view of her cleavage. The female actress soon realised what s/he was doing, however. "AAAAAAHHHHHHHHH! You pervert!" she screamed shielding her chest with her arms. Beatrix, Freya and Eiko gasped at the scene, as did everyone at the party. Garnet spat out her drink everywhere with surprise. Blank rushed over to Ruby, "What's wrong Ruby? Why did you scream?" he asked. "That filthy thing was oglin' me!" she stated pointing at Queldo. The Qu frowned at her expression towards him/her. Everyone started to crowd round them.

"Uh-oh! It's kicking off!" said Zidane as he ran over to the scene and was followed by Amarant. Quina stayed behind. Harold pushed through the crowd and approached Queldo. "Why you- You are at a party! Not a strip club! Get back to the kitchen or we will not pay you!" he ordered. Queldo became angry, "NO!" s/he shouted. "Harold gasped with shock at his/her objection. "What did you just say!?" he scowled. "I say 'no'! You like that? NO!" Queldo repeated. Everyone was muttering with surprise at the event. Garnet made her way to the front of the crowd, "What's going on here!?" she asked. "The substitute master chef is being disobedient! S/he was caught ogling Miss Ruby!" Beatrix informed her. Garnet glared at Queldo, "You! Queldo! I will not tolerate this kind of behaviour! I demand that you go back to the kitchen at once! Or leave!" she ordered. "How dare you speak to me like that! You no can give me orders! I not one of your servants!" shouted Queldo. "Yes, that's correct. But we are paying you to cook! You will not get paid unless you do just that!" she yelled.

Zidane approached the infuriated Qu. "What are you doing? It isn't nice to peek down a ladies dress! You should learn some manners!" he stated. "Shut up! Filthy monkey!" insulted Queldo. Steiner stepped forward, "Don't be so disrespectful! That is no way to be talking to Zidane Tribal!" he declared. "I no care who he is! He waste of life!" shouted the Qu. Everyone gasped at his/her most recent remark in disgust. Even Zidane was surprised to hear it. "You warped Quina's mind! Made him/her more like you! More of weakling!" shouted Queldo. Vivi butted in, "Hey! Don't talk about Quina like that! S/he is twice the cook that you'll ever be!" he yelled. Quina smiled at Vivi's kind words.

Then, bristling with rage, Queldo grabbed Vivi's collar and picked him up. "So, descent spreads throughout ranks! You mindless golem spawned from mist! And, you share in Quina's fate!" he threatened as he charged up a spell to attack the defenceless mage. Vivi hung from Queldo's grasp unable to do anything as he awaited his death at the hands of the twisted Qu. Quina watched from the background, having seen enough of his/her rivals disrespect and threats. Women screamed at what Queldo was doing. "VIVI!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" cried Zidane, as did Garnet Freya, Eiko, Steiner, Beatrix, Tantalus, Cid and Hilda. "DADDY!!!!!!!!" cried the young black mages. Harold backed away when light emitted from Queldo's free hand as he charged up his spell to kill Vivi. Amarant armed his claws, ready to attack the Qu.

"GET BACK!!!!" cried a voice from behind everyone. The crowd parted to reveal Quina glaring at Queldo. "UUUAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!" screamed Quina as he launched an Aqua Breath attack on his rival. The blast of water tore through the air towards the Qu. S/he had no time to react and was hit directly in the stomach and s/he cried out with pain. The force of the powerful attack dragged Queldo into the air and away from Alexandria, thus saving Vivi's life. The young black mage fell to the floor in relief. Everyone, after a few moments of silence cheered to see the defeat of the trouble causing Master Chef substitute. Zidane walked over to his black mage friend and offered his hand. "Hey. You alright, Vivi?" he asked. He took the genomes hand and stood upright, "....Yeah.... I'm okay, just a little bit dazed...." he answered. "Daddy!" cried multiple voices from the crowd. Vivi looked up and saw his children running up to him. All six of them hugged their father, relieved that he was ok. Quina approached them, "Quina.... That was amazing!" said Freya. The Qu looked down at the young black mage, "I sorry s/he hurt you, Vivi." Quina said. "Thanks, Quina. For saving my life." He said and they shook hands.

Everyone clapped Quina for ridding them of his/her rival. "So. What do you think happened to Queldo?" asked Zidane. "His/her head be sore for awhile, but s/he not perish." Quina replied. "Well done, Quina!" congratulated Garnet. "Whoa! That was wicked, Quina!" complimented Tantalus. The Qu received further expressions from the townspeople. Suddenly an Alexandrian chef came running through the crowd, "Oh no! What are we going to do!? We don't have a master chef! We need one or else there will be no more food!" he cried. Everyone turned to Quina. The Qu put on a brave face and stepped up, "I Master Chef! No more cheap replacements!" s/he stated. Zidane and co. cheered him/her as s/he headed for the kitchen, as did the crowd.

Then, everyone relaxed and returned to their seats as they enjoyed the rest of Garnet's birthday party...