Chapter 25: Consequences

Charlie POV

The ride home from Alice's was long and silent and every so often, I could feel Bella's eyes on me from the other side of the car.

I had been out of my mind with worry when I had arrived at her friend's house last night to find that Bella wasn't there. Alice had tried to insist that she would be back soon and she would have her call me, but the years in law enforcement had given me a keen sense of deciphering when someone was lying. I knew that she was essentially a good kid, and she finally broke down when Bella hadn't come back in two hours and told me that she was with Edward.

Throughout the night, my anxiety and anger continued to rise until I finally saw that jeep coming down the road this morning. As it pulled to a stop in front of me, aside from the hurt I felt, every instinct inside of me urged me to extricate that boy from his vehicle. I knew what that would lead to, and it was nowhere good. However, I was startled when I saw the look on my little girl's face as she glanced over at him one more time. It was a look that knotted the pit of my stomach and I had to push it away quickly and refocus on the situation at hand.

I was having difficulty grasping the fact that I had been deceived. My little girl had deceived me. I had thought that Bella was a responsible girl, that she would never pull something like this on me, but I had been wrong. She had been with this boy all night, doing who knows what. My little girl and a teenage boy. The same little girl that I once changed diapers for when she was just a baby, that I used to take to baseball games. My little princess that would climb up into my cruiser on Sundays so that we could go for ice cream together.

Disappointment was creeping through me the more I thought about this. How could she do this to me? I wasn't sure how to handle this. There was no doubt in my mind as to what was happening between them now and I really wished that I could have been kept in the dark about it. Obliviousness on this facet of a parent's life was a very valued treasure. One that I no longer had, because today, her pretense had come crumbling down the moment I saw that boy pulling up in front of Alice's house with my daughter beside him.

Obviously, I'd had my suspicions about the nature of their relationship, though never truly allowing myself to accept it; but now it was confirmed. They were having... sex and I couldn't do anything about it. The knowledge that they were protected to a point offered me little comfort. Did they not realize the emotional consequences this would bring to them? Didn't she realize that the more she gave, the harder it would be to let go?

On one hand, I was saddened; but on the other, I was furious. She had made me look like a fool, as if I never paid any attention to her. There had never been any other time that I had been this angry with my daughter, but I knew that anything I said or did right now I would only regret in the long run. My knuckles were white from my grip on the steering wheel, but my eyes were fixed on the frozen road; keeping me conscious of the fact that I needed to drive slowly.

When we finally reached the driveway, she leapt out of the car and quickly trudged through the freshly fallen snow leading up to the front door. I knew she was probably trying to avoid this conversation, but this was the last straw. I was fuming by the time I had reached the house and caught her just as she reached the first few steps leading up to her room.

"Not so fast, Isabella. Sit. Now."

She stiffened slightly at the sound of my voice, which had remained amazingly calm... too calm. And she seemed to know this as she slowly pivoted around on the balls of her feet to descend back down, dropping her bag at the foot of the stairs before sitting in the chair that I was pointing to. I stood in front of her with my arms folded tightly across my chest as she timidly sat down.

"Would you care to explain to me where you have been all night? Why I have been up all night, imagining the worst possible scenarios as to what could have happened to you when you weren't answering your phone?" She opened her mouth to reply and I shook my head, holding my hand up to her. "Just when I begin to put a little bit of trust in you, Bella, you take off all night to who knows where, doing who knows what with that boy..."

"I know, Dad," she interrupted softly, her eyes still lowered to the floor.

I inhaled deeply through my nose in an attempt to reign in my anger, but it was futile.

"No, you don't know, young lady!" I snapped in a stern voice, startling her into looking up at me. I hadn't lost my temper like this with her in as long as we both could remember and I watched her hands grip the sides of her seat as she swallowed nervously. "You have no idea how terrified I was when you weren't where you were supposed to be! And when your phone repeatedly went to voicemail all night! Do you know how close I came to sending a search party out for you and taking that boy in for kidnapping this morning, effectively destroying his future?"

"Dad, you can't do that!" Bella exclaimed, her eyes widened in shock as she shook her head vehemently. "Edward didn't kidnap me! Please, don't! Ground me or whatever, just please don't do that to Edward. This is all he's wanted since he was a kid. Please!"

"You are sixteen years old, Bella! You have no business being anywhere unsupervised, let alone overnight with a boy! Any boy, not just that one!" My voice was echoing through the small expanse of our living room, followed by the thundering of my hand slamming down on top of the television. She jumped slightly at the sound and bit her lip nervously as our gazes locked. "And I will do whatever I see fit when it comes to my child!"

Surprisingly her eyes narrowed, and she suddenly stood from her chair.

"Dad, has it escaped your notice that I'm not a child anymore?" she exclaimed, waving her arms out and shaking her head.

"You are still my child and it is my job to protect you," I retorted firmly but she still didn't back down.

"And what exactly are you protecting me from? From Edward? From being loved?"

"From being hurt, Bella," I retorted angrily, silence following as my voice echoed.

"Maybe I need to be hurt, Dad!" she cried out and my eyes flew open to see tears streaming down her face. "Maybe I need to feel what it's like to have my heart break when he leaves. And the joy when he comes back, and everything in between. The love and pain and happiness and sadness... it's all a part of life! I can't stop living the way you did because something hurts me like Mom hurt you."

I was mute for a few minutes, her words hurting me for the first time in so long, and only because of the direction this conversation had turned. This was not the moment to talk about this, and I was certainly not in the right mindset to bring this up now. Just as I was opening my mouth to stop her, Bella beat me to it.

"It's been ten years, Dad. Ten years isn't enough time to be able to talk about m-my... my mom?" Her small frame was trembling with emotion and her fists clenched tightly at her sides, as if she truly were the proverbial time bomb. "You were no older than me when you met Mom, and just a little older when you had me. Would you go back and change that if you could? If it could have saved you from the hurt, would you rather you hadn't met Mom or had me?"

My eyes widened slightly at the tone she was taking with me; she had never spoken to me this way before. It wasn't the defiant tone of a teenager. It was laced with pain... deep seeded pain. I could almost feel something coming that I wasn't ready to face. Ever since I had spoken of my beloved wife on Christmas, the memories and pain that I had been trying to bury all these years had come back in full force. I couldn't deal with this now.

"Isabella Marie Swan, now is not the time for this! Go to your room!"

"But Dad.."

"Now!" I snapped, pointing toward the stairs. Bella only gazed at me for a moment, her head shaking slightly before turning and running up the steps to her bedroom. I heard the door closing roughly, making the walls creak from the force of it.

As I heard her soft cries echoing from above me, my heart clenched in my chest. I drove my hands into my hair as I attempted to collect myself, my body tense from what had just transpired in this room. Suddenly I felt my legs trembling and threatening to give out beneath me, the emotions that I was feeling finally sinking into my brain. I reached for the couch, lowering myself down and burying my face in my hands.

What Bella said had hurt but I should have realized the reason behind it. It hurt because it was the truth. My little girl was not so little anymore, and she had pointed out to me what a mediocre father I have been for her. Not only was she able to lie to me but she shook me into realizing what my mistake had been all these years. Avoidance.

I had been avoiding the reality of the situation. I had been comfortable with my numbness, neglecting the one thing I knew I should have done years ago. Talking about my feelings concerning my wife's death. Freeing myself of this burden I've been carrying which had also affected my daughter, stretching the gap between us. Creating this pink elephant that had been standing between us for far too long.

I realized that the pain I had been feeling and keeping to myself is what brought this upon me. I was the one responsible for keeping my daughter at an arm's length, feeling unable to truly connect with her. For so long, I had blamed it more on her just being a girl and never really understanding them well in the first place; but I had no difficulty understanding her now. She was hurting... and I was to blame for that.

I hadn't understood that all this time, all she had wanted and needed was to talk about her mother. To talk about her loss, her missing motherly figure, her lack of guidance. I hadn't been there for her when she needed me. I hadn't been there for her at all, and this pained me beyond anything else because now it was clear that without Renee, I had failed. I hadn't provided the only thing that Bella had ever demanded of me. Now looking at it more clearly, it was the only logical solution. We both were hurting; we had both lost the same person. We had been a family once, and I needed to be the one to bring us closer together again; because after all, I was the head of this household.

My daughter needed me.

I stood and began walking toward the stairs, ascending them slowly as I felt the weight of what I was about to face pressing down on me. I took a deep breath before knocking at her door softly, hearing nothing from the inside.

"Bella?"

The silence continued from the other side, and I felt my heart begin to pound erratically. With a sharp intake of breath, I opened her door slowly and prepared myself for anything that I might find. I closed my eyes with relief when I found her sitting in the middle of her bed, her head down and tears falling from her cheeks, creating a darkened circle on her jeans underneath her. I walked over to her bed and sat down on the edge, neither of us making eye contact with the other as we remained in silence for several moments.

"Bella," I began calmly, keeping my eyes focused on my folded hands in front of me. "I want to talk to you. I need you to understand a few things."

She disregarded me as if I was not in her room; but I knew she was listening, so I continued. I wanted to erase the misconceptions that my daughter might have.

"Please hear me out," I said, sighing heavily. "I never want you for one second to believe that I have ever regretted having you. You are the best and most important thing in my life, and I wouldn't trade you for anything."

There was a small pause while I allowed her to gather her thoughts.

"But you regret meeting Mom," she mumbled in a soft tearful voice and I turned my head toward her briefly to meet her eyes, only to let out another heavy sigh. I had no idea how to respond to that. "See, this is exactly what I mean. We can never just sit down and talk about Mom without you changing the subject or getting edgy. Everything still revolves around her, but she remains that one thing that we can never talk about."

"I could never regret meeting your mom," I replied softly with the only response I could conjure. "There is nothing that could make me regret that. Without her, I wouldn't have you."

"Then why are you trying to prevent me from living my own life? Making my own mistakes? You've always done this, ever since Mom died," she replied, her voice cracking slightly as spoke. "Dad, I know I will always be your little girl in your mind and heart, but I haven't been a little girl for a long time. I had to try to understand something as a child that most adults couldn't comprehend. Did you know that Edward was the first person I have ever talked to about Mom? Or how good it felt to finally get it all out? To finally be free of this enormous weight on me because I was too afraid to talk to you about it?"

As each of her words hit me, I realized how mundane my role as a father had been. I should have left my comfort zone and reached out to her. I had never sat down with Bella and asked how she was feeling. It felt as if I was just beginning to know my own daughter right now, and it hurt. In my place, this boy had listened to her, listened to how she missed her mother as every other girl her age was oblivious to the privilege of having one.

After a few seconds of silence, I inhaled as Bella continued.

"I didn't just lose my mother that day. I lost a part of you too. When was the last time we went to a baseball game?"

Her sudden question again took me off guard, and I lowered my gaze from hers.

"Bella, you hate baseball," I said softly, unable to meet her eyes again. The pain in her words struck a chord in my heart and I could feel my own tears welling.

"Yes, I do. Now," she replied tightly, hugging her knees to her chest. "Because that's something I used to do with my dad. There was a huge ballpark built in Phoenix, and we never went once. You've been shut off from me since right after the funeral."

"Bella, I can't talk about this right now," I replied, my chest tightening more with the pain in her voice. "This isn't the situation at hand..."

"You need to, Dad! Maybe not today or tomorrow, but you definitely do!" she replied firmly, shaking her head. "It's never going to get any better until then. For either of us. I'm not trying to get out of anything or saying any of these things to make you feel bad. I know what I did last night is not 'proper behavior for a young lady' or whatever, and I know I'm probably going to get grounded for it. God, I even expect it! But don't you think you are overreacting just a little when you start talking about arresting him? You are so afraid of me being hurt the way that you were that you are villianizing him when he wouldn't harm a single hair on my head. He's in love with me, Dad. And I am so in love with him."

Hearing the words from her lips solidified what I guess I had already known subconsciously, and it hit me like a blow to the gut. The thought alone was enough to send a tremor of fear through my entire body and I leaned forward to rest my face in my hands.

"Bella, you're so young," I said softly, pressing the heels of my palms against my eyes in an attempt to force back the threatening tears. I felt her presence as she crawled over to kneel next to me, and her hand rest gently on my shoulder.

"I may only be sixteen but I need you to realize that I have grown up, and I have fallen in love with a wonderful person. You even thought so yourself before we got together," she began in a gentle tone and I lowered my hands to look over at her. "Edward isn't just my boyfriend, he's my best friend. He is the first person who has really made me feel whole in so long, and I need him in my life. I love you, Dad and I always will, but I need you to allow me to have my relationship with Edward. I may make mistakes, and I know it will definitely hurt when he leaves in eight months. But I need to experience this and make those mistakes in order to grow and learn from them. And most of all, I need my dad."

When I looked into her eyes, I knew in the back of my mind that she was absolutely right. The way she spoke of him did not sound like a young girl with her first teenage crush, but a young woman in the throes of first love. And in that moment, she reminded me so much of her mother at her age that it tugged even more at my heart. It also filled me with a strong sense of regret that she had been forced to grow up so fast because I was too weak to see past my own grief and loss to truly see hers.

I had convinced myself that by burying away any thought of her mother that I was protecting her from painful memories, when in reality, I was doing her a disservice by trying to guard myself and shutting myself down. I was not the doting and attentive father I started out to be and instead detached myself immensely from the one thing in the world that meant the most to me; my little girl. I slowly and hesitantly raised my hand to rest on hers, and it drove her point home even more. I was struggling with physical contact with my own daughter, and hers with me as her head nervously lowered to rest on my shoulder.

And as I pressed my lips to the top of her head and the small smile appeared on her lips, I made a decision. I was going to do whatever it would take to be the kind of father I started out to be, the one that Bella deserved.

"I love you, Bella," I said softly against her hair and she pressed herself a little closer to me in response. "But you're still grounded."

Bella unexpectedly began to laugh, hiccoughing slightly through her tears. "I know," she replied and raised her glistening eyes to meet mine. "And I love you too, Dad."

We stayed in our embrace for several minutes, until I straightened slowly and patted her knee, raising up of the bed to stand and making my way to her door. Before I left, I turned back to look at her with my hand on the doorknob. "I do think it's time Edward and I had a little talk, however."

Her eyes widened and her mouth open and closed in quick succession as I closed the door behind me.

BPOV

To say I was nervous was an understatement as I paced the front hallway, waiting for Edward to arrive. I had been running around the house, cleaning like a maniac, doing all the laundry; anything to keep my mind preoccupied all afternoon until I ran out of things to do. It was Friday, the day I had been dreading since I told him on Monday at school that my father wanted to talk to him. Not knowing exactly what my wanted to say to him was probably worse than the thought of him and my father in the same room together, especially after the events of last weekend. But if Edward was nervous, he never really showed it. He even kissed me goodbye with a smile after school today with the promise of seeing me in a few hours.

My dad was calm as well when he got home from work tonight.

Okay, I was terrified.

I jumped slightly when a knock came to the door and I rushed over to it, opening it quickly and throwing my arms tightly around Edward. He hugged me back gently and kissed my temple.

"It's going to be okay, baby," he whispered soothingly into my ear before his hold on me loosened, and I could sense my father's presence behind us.

I stepped back from Edward and turned to face my dad, biting my lip nervously.

"Chief Swan," he greeted him in a respectful tone, holding his hand out to him.

"Edward," my dad replied in an emotionless voice, shaking Edward's extended hand before turning his eyes to me and gesturing them wordlessly toward the stairs.

I glanced at Edward briefly, and he gave me a reassuring smile before I turned and headed up the stairs to my room, closing the door and pressing my ear against it to try to hear anything I could. All I heard were the footsteps disappearing down the hall to the back of the house and into the kitchen. I growled in frustration and began pacing my room, knowing I would never be able to hear anything that was happening.

Please please don't bring out the gun, Dad. Please, I silently begged as I returned to the door to listen again.

No yelling. That was a good sign, right?

Twenty minutes passed, and I noticed the cuffs of my sweater at my wrist beginning to fray from the constant tugging. And still nothing from downstairs.

Another twenty minutes, and I swore my palms were going to have permanent half-moon indents from my nails digging into them. Silence.

I lay on my bed ten minutes later, staring at the ceiling and contemplating if this was what an ulcer felt like when I heard my name called out from the foot of the stairs. I shot up out of bed and bolted across the room and out the door, immediately spotting both my dad and Edward standing down there looking up at me. They both appeared calm and relaxed, and I hesitantly descended the stairs, eyeing them warily.

When I reached the bottom, my dad's eyes turned to Edward and he uttered two words. Ten minutes.

Once he moved into the living room, Edward reached out for my hand and we walked silently out to the porch and closed the door behind us. Before uttering a single word, he wrapped his arms around me and pulled me against him, holding me against his chest. But my anxiety was still too great, and I pushed against his chest gently to look up at him.

"Edward, you're killing me here. What happened? What did he say? What did you say? Wh-"

He cut my rambling cut off by bringing his fingers up to press against my lips. I sighed softly and his hand fell away to gently brush my lips with his.

"We only have ten minutes, Bella," he said seriously and I felt my stomach tighten until his smile slowly spread across his face. "For now. You're still grounded until the end of the semester and of course, no more sleepovers at Alice's until we can earn his trust again. But..."

I watched him expectantly, urging him to continue with my eyes, but my impatience won out. "But what?"

Edward chuckled and kissed my forehead, tightening his hold around my waist. "After that, I can come over to see you after school once your dad gets home from work and we can go out on the weekends, providing you're home by eleven."

I smiled widely as I took his face in my hands and pressed my lips to his in relief. My worst fears were not coming to light. Our foreheads rested together in silence as I closed my eyes and slid my arms around his neck, enjoying this moment of peace between us that I hadn't felt in almost a week. We weren't going to be forced apart, even if there would be some restrictions placed on us for a while. I could live with that as long as I didn't have to live without Edward. My fingers played lightly with the hair at his neck and while his hands gently ran over my back.

"Thank you for doing this, Edward."

"Your dad is a good guy, Bella. And he loves you. I can't possibly hold that against him. He just wants to protect you, and I already know what you are going to say, but just try to see things his way for a while. In the long run, we will all benefit from it," he said with that smirk that I loved so much as I opened my eyes to gaze at him again. He lifted my chin with his fingers and brushed my lips gently with his. "So let's not press his generosity right now, what do you say?"

I gave him a feigned pout with my hands grasping the front of his jacket, causing him to chuckle.

"Okay, I'll see you Monday," I replied softly, a smile breaking through and raising myself up to meet his lips again before he pulled away.

I waited on the porch until he was in his car and I waved before he pulled away, and then headed back into the house. When I reached the kitchen, I found my dad seated at the table with a strange expression on his face. His hands folded around his beer can, his eyes intensely focused on it. I wasn't sure if I should say something, or what; so I walked over to the oven to retrieve the casserole I'd had warming inside and went about serving our dinner.

"He's really a nice boy, Bella," my dad said suddenly from behind me and I turned my head to see his expression hadn't changed at all. He finally raised his eyes up to mine, where I finally caught a hint of sadness. "He really does love you."

Suddenly it all seemed to make sense. I'm sure there was still a part of him that almost hoped to find a flaw or some hint of insincerity in Edward, and he almost appeared disappointed when he had difficulty finding it.

Eventually his eyes creased slightly at the edges and a small smile teased at his lips.

"Yea he is and he really does," I replied as I set his dinner down in front of him and sat down beside him so we could start eating.

We stayed in a comfortable silence for a while and just as we were finishing, he set his fork down on the plate and casually took a sip of his beer. "So I made a few calls today, and I am being set up with a counselor."

I paused mid-bite as I raised my eyes to look at him, his gaze never lifting from the table again. His unease was written clearly all over his face, and I knew what a huge step this was for him. I leaned across the table and reached my hand over to take his, giving it a gentle squeeze.

"This is a good thing, Dad. I'm proud of you."

He took a slow breath and brought his gaze up to meet mine warily. I could see the uncertainty still lingering there but a small smile teased at the corner of his mouth, and he nodded silently.

"It gets easier," I said simply and then returned to finish my dinner.

x-x-x

The next couple of months were uneventful outside of going to school and my dad's numerous mood swings as he began grief counseling. I would always try to make him something special for dinner whenever it seemed that he would have a particularly rough session. I had met with his counselor, Margaret, at her request and during our meeting, she prepared me for the long road ahead of my father. Nothing was going to change overnight, and where I had always had the outlet of my drawings and now with Edward, it had been festering inside my father for the past ten years. He took the path that many widowers would of avoidance; if they didn't think about it, it was a little less real and it made it a little easier to cope. And in my father's case, the loss combined with the severe feeling of abandonment, of not being enough for her, was just too much to bear; so he buried it inside.

But tonight was different. The semester had ended and I was waiting excitedly for him to come home from work, eager to show him my progress report. If being separated from Edward had resulted in anything, it was my extended periods of time in my room studying; thereby improving my grades exceptionally. And I now sat with a near perfect progress report on the table in front of me.

My smile did not leave my face all afternoon, as I knew that this would mean that my plans for tonight would materialize. I would have my first date with Edward since that night at the cabin, and I could barely contain my excitement. When my dad finally arrived home and entered the kitchen, I was relieved to see that he was in a good mood as he immediately held his hand out for the piece of paper. He perused it calmly and expressionlessly, although I could just barely make out the slight twitching of the corners of his mouth.

"Good job, Bella," he said in a composed voice, while I bounced slightly in anticipation. He reached into the front pocket of his shirt and pulled out my cell phone, obviously expecting this just as much as I was. "Go on, go call him."

I shrieked lightly as I leapt out of my chair and took my phone, and he chuckled as I kissed his cheek. "Thank you, Dad!"

"You know the rules, Bella," he called after me as I was already running down the hall toward the stairs, punching in Edward's number.

"I know!" I laughed and ran up the stairs, and I swore I heard him laugh in response while he began ordering a pizza for dinner for himself.

Being with Edward again outside of school walls was heaven; but where he took me felt like paradise. He brought me back to the same meadow where he first told me he loved me, and first kissed me of his own accord without any reservation... where he became mine. We rested on the grass together with me seated between his legs and resting back against his chest, staring up at the darkening sky and the hints of stars appearing. Our hands never stopped touching the other; but for once, there was nothing sexual about it even in the complete seclusion and privacy afforded us.

It was just us... enjoying being us.

I was exploring and learning the little things about him again that I could only know by touch. Like the slight indent below the knuckle of his right index finger, from where he had broken the bone there when he was eight during a Little League game. And how his left kneecap was ever so slightly off center, though Edward always insisted that I was imagining that. All the tiny details that made him unique; my Edward.

I don't know how long we sat there, lacing our hands together and enjoying the peace and quiet around us, before Edward brought one hand over to illuminate his watch. He sighed and kissed my temple, murmuring against my skin that it was time to go. So little had been said tonight, but it had still been one of the best nights I had ever spent with him; and now it had to end. But I would not leave without the promise that we could come back here anytime I wanted, now that my punishment was over.

My eyes began to drift closed on the short drive home, and I hummed softly as he said my name when the car came to a stop. But his voice was off and I opened my eyes to find his gaze locked on my front porch. I followed his line of vision to find a hunched over Alice seated on my front step, rocking back and forth in quick succession.

"Oh no, this can't be good," I mumbled to myself and leaned over to gently kiss Edward. "I'll call you tomorrow."

He nodded briefly before I got out of the car and made my way up the front walk toward her.

"Okay, what did Jasper do now?" I asked, trying to keep my voice light to gauge her mood.

But when she lifted her head, the vision that reflected back at me was one I had never seen on Alice. Her cheeks were puffy, and her eyes were red with the evidence of the many tears preceding the ones now trailing down her face.

"Alice, what's wrong?" I asked in alarm, hurrying to crouch in front of her and taking her hands.

"Bella," she rasped out in response before another sob wracked her body. "I think I'm pregnant."