Chapter 25

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Wednesday, October 11, 1916 (cont'd)

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"This is good stuff," Bella said, taking a deep draw on her cannabis cigarette. Her brogue thickened under the influence. Eddie inhaled what she exhaled, and began to laugh. He was the only person in the room who wasn't smoking, but he considered himself equally intoxicated.

"Don't get used to it." He drew her breath into his mouth and his eyes rolled back. "Mmm… we have an odd life."

"Who doesn't?"

"My mother."

"Yer mammy's been looking for ye for four years. That's nae normal, love."

"My ma thinks it's a good time to take you to Paris." He slid down next to her on the cot, taking care not to lean on her ribs.

Bella snorted in the most adorable way as she flicked ash into the tin resting on her belly. "She and mae auntie are in league," she growled. "With the devil."

"Eh?" Eddie propped himself back on an elbow and peered at her. She lifted the hand bearing the cigarette to Eddie's hair and brushed the forelock out of his eyes. He stole the stub before she could set his hair on fire, took a last draw on it and dropped it into the tin.

Bella stroked her fingers affectionately through his hair. "Ach, mae love, I'm sae sorry for calling yer lovely mam a witch."

"I should hope so. But why did you?" Eddie confiscated the tin and set it under the bed with exaggerated care.

Bella looked both ways and whispered, "Mae auntie's one."

"Honest?" Nose-to-nose, he looked into her eyes. "Does she hex people?"

"No-o-o. Not that kind o' witch. The kind that begins with a bee."

Eddie blinked and tried to put that together. It didn't make much sense. "A witch and a bee. Bee… witched."

"That's nae it."

"Why don't you just spit it out, then?"

Slowly, she shook her head. "I haff done enough swearing today."

"Ohh… a bitch." He nodded solemnly. "Why is Auntie Maggie a bitch, Bella?"

Her large dark eyes turned lustrous with tears. "She's taken it into her heid that you and I are nae married."

"Really." Now, that wasn't exactly a problem. "We'll have to prove it to her."

"Thae certificate is in thon office in Ypres. Cullen's. Or maybe in the kirk, which is probably burned out by noo."

Eddie gave the matter careful consideration and came to one conclusion. "There's only one thing to be done."

She shook her head solemnly. "We're neffer gang back."

"Of course not." Flipping back the blankets, he freed himself and reached for her clit.

"What are ye doing?" She sounded astonished.

"We need a baby."

"Aw, shit," Jazz groaned from the other side of the room. "Not this, Mace. Anything but this."

Eddie ignored him in favour of pleasing his wife. But she kept trying to stop his hand. Why would she do that?

"Tisnae proper, Eddie! Yon fellows—"

"But Humphries is worried you might have hysteria," he crooned against her jaw. She threw her arms around him and cackled.

"Do ye think he knows he's paying a mon to gie his wife orgasms?" The pair of them laughed so hard they shook the cot.

"I very much doubt it," he said conspiratorially. "I don't think Humphries is the type of man who'd know any better if his little woman didn't—"

"Aw, hell!" Jasper's voice, which was much too close for comfort, made Eddie jump. Jazz grasped Eddie by the back of his clothes. The next thing Eddie knew, he was being set on his feet on the other side of the privacy screen.

"Hey!"

Jazz was hiding his eyes behind his hand. "Do us all a favour and save it 'til you're home, will ya?"

Eddie felt his forehead wrinkle up. "That's never stopped us before."

"I've noticed." Jazz peeked out from behind his hand, and then hid his eyes again. "Jeez, Louise, Mace. Holster the weapon. Please."

"But—"

"You'll regret it in the morning. Anybody could come in here. Humphries… Katy… a couple of dozen PBIs…"

"Shit." Swiping back his hair, Eddie tucked himself away and began to totter back to Bella.

"Where are you going?"

"To sleep."

"Nuh-uh," Jazz grasped his shoulder and steered him toward his own cot. "You're not behaving appropriately."

"I'm not?" Eddie gazed at his friend amiably. Jasper was such a good fellow. Such a mother hen to his mates.

"No. Obviously, you cannot hold your cannabis." He gave Eddie a push that tipped him onto the cot. "Nighty-night, Mace."

"Hey, it's dark outside."

"Yep. Go to sleep."

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Thursday, October 12, 1916

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A soft footfall sounded in the darkness. Eddie opened his eyes and discovered a wavering, golden orb of light, which moved erratically toward the screen separating Bella from the rest of the room. He wondered for a moment if it were Tinkerbell paying a visit, but dismissed the childish fancy.[i]

"Katy?" he murmured.

"Just checking on Bella, Lieutenant. Go back to sleep. You'll have a busy day ahead of you."

"All right." When he next awoke, it was indecently late and the room was bustling with people. He sat up, his hands pressed to his eyes, and absentmindedly rubbed his hand over his arm. The hives were much better but those remaining flared with a sting that called to him to scratch. His eyes were scratchy, too. He'd need help to do the required eyewash treatment.

"Sign here," Humphries said, bent over Jazz.

"Hold it!" Eddie snapped.

"Excuse me?" Humphries sounded shocked and Eddie tried not to cringe.

"Sorry, Sir. I was talking to Jasper, not to you. What's he signing?"

"His discharge papers. Standard stuff."

"Have you read it, Jazz?"

"I…"

Why did he hesitate to answer? "Read it before you sign."

"I… There's stuff in here I can't… I have…"

"Can you read?" Eddie tried to suppress his irrational frustration. Many men couldn't read at levels beyond the second grade.

"I can, it's just that some of the words don't make sense to me."

"Too legalistic?" Eddie asked.

"No. I have… congenital word blindness."[ii]

Humphries turned to Harris. "Dyslexia. It's caused by visual processing deficiencies. You ought to add it into his discharge report."

"Yes, sir." Without adieu, Harris exited the room, report in hand.

"I should like to hear the contents of the discharge papers before Hale and McCarty sign them, please," Eddie said.

"I don't really have time to read them to you, Lieutenant," Humphries said, "and as we have established, Hale and McCarty are unable to read the papers aloud to you themselves. You can trust me to—"

"Sir, it isn't you I don't trust, it's the Army. Bella?"

"Hm?"

"I'm sorry to disturb you, my darling, but could you possibly read McCarty and Hale's papers to me?"

"Of course. Just gie me a moment."

"Thank you, sweetheart."

"Ye're most welcome."

A brisk knock touched upon the already-open door and a short dark form poked its head inside. "Good morning, my loves," Mother Biggins sang as she marched in, Papa Biggins on her heels. "I said to Papa, I thought we'd best come straightaway as our Bella didn't return last night."

"Mumma!" Emmett yelped, "Turks!" just as Eddie said, "Thank God. Papa Biggins, can you read Jasper and Emmett's discharge papers to me?"

"I'll leave you to it," Humphries said, passing two stacks of paperwork to Eddie. "Don't be long. I have to meet Lieutenant Ashby, the military policeman, in half an hour."

"Yes, Sir." Eddie hadn't forgotten Ashby from his own encounter. "Does Emmett have to see him?"

"No." Humphries left abruptly.

"What on earth's the matter?" Mama Biggins tut-tutted as Emmett dragged her down into a hug.

"I must speak with both of you," Eddie said, searching for his clothes to no avail. He caught the papers as they began to slide toward the floor.

"Where's Bella?" Papa Biggins wanted to know, collecting the papers from Eddie's lap. "And why are you in hospital?"

"I'm here," Bella called from behind the screen. A quiet groan betrayed that she was still in pain.

"I'm fine," Eddie said, "but they've taken my clothes somewhere for laundering. Bella, on the other hand, is badly hurt."

"It's nae that bad, ye silly mon."

Eddie shut his eyes. "Dr. Morton yelled that we were under attack and Cap and I knocked her down, squashed her and broke her ribs. And then she hit him and busted her thumb."

"Can you repeat that?" Mama Biggins demanded.

"Forgive me, but time is of the essence. I know it's going to be rough, but I need to get these men out of here as soon as possible."

"Of course, whatever you need," Mama Biggins said immediately. Eddie was grateful that he didn't need to waste time explaining.

"Thank you, Mother. Papa Biggins, I need you to read me every word of Jasper and Emmett's discharge papers before Humphries returns. He's very anxious to have them sign it. I need to know if everything's Jake before Ashby shows up. The Army wants Cap back awfully badly and Ashby is a real hardnose."[iii]

"Turks," Emmett sighed.

Papa Biggins pulled a chair close to Eddie's cot and began to recite the words on Jasper's papers in a clear, strong voice. " 'To Whom It May Concern: Private Jasper Emmerson Hale, weight 120 pounds, height 6'2", chest 31", eyes blue, hair flaxen, enlisted in Toronto in the Canadian Infantry in March of 1914 under Captain Emmett McCarty and served with distinction at St. Julien in April of 1915, where he assisted in the detainment of four German prisoners. He served at the Ypres Salient from May of 1915 to March of 1916, at which time he was promoted to Ensign. Ensign Hale fought in several battles at the Somme up until his disablement in September of 1916, when he acquired a nervous disorder behind the salient at Pozières. Ensign Hale, the Canadian Army thanks you for your service."

"What are they offering him for retirement?" Eddie demanded.

"Let me see here… a lifetime pension of three shillings a week, a retirement dispensation of five pounds for his two years of service, and a twenty-five pound gratuity for permanent disability."

"Take it," Eddie urged.

Papa Biggins returned the papers to Jazz and showed him where to sign. While Jazz scribbled his signature, Papa Biggins collected Emmett's papers and resumed his seat. " 'To Whom It May Concern: First Lieutenant Emmett Wallace McCarty, weight 165 pounds, height 6'2", chest 36", eyes brown, hair dark brown, received a commission in Toronto from the British-Canadian Infantry in December of 1905 under Captain Robert Jennings. He has, in wartime and at peace, served with exemplary distinction and earned the rank of captain in consequence of valour. In August of 1914, Captain McCarty took command of 60 men and led them overseas, where they battled alongside French and British troops in various locations including Neuve Chappelle in March of 1915, and St. Julien in April of 1915. He subsequently served at the Ypres Salient from May of 1915 to March of 1916, and in the Somme from April of 1916 to August of 1916, where he went Missing in Action. One month later, he was found in Pozières and diagnosed with neurasthenia.' "

Eddie noted that Emmett's service record was much more detailed than Jasper's. That wasn't surprising. Papa Biggins flipped over to the next page and continued to read.

" 'Captain McCarty, based on your magnificent service record, the Canadian Army orders your transfer to the Scottish Hospital for the Shell Shocked in Edinburgh in hopes that your rehabilitation and return to duty will be swift. Thank you for your valiant—' "

"No," Eddie growled as Emmett gagged and threw himself toward his bedside table. The drawer crashed to the floor, glass and personal objects rattling and spilling out, as Emmett grasped something shiny. "No! Stop him!" Eddie shouted as Papa Biggins and Jasper converged on Emmett. Mama Biggins began to boo hoo. Eddie held his breath as men shouted and fought. After several seconds, Papa Biggins liberated a straight razor from Emmett's clutches and threw it into the corner while Jasper held his captain down. Eddie joined the dogpile. After straightening Emmett's legs, he peered over Jasper's head and glared at his commander.

"Stop it. You're upsetting the ladies. Mama Biggins has lost one son already."

"Mumma," Emmett wailed. His glassy eyes rolled backward and he began to convulse.

"Doctor!" Eddie shouted at the top of his lungs. "Doctor!"

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Eddie paced, arms crossed, in front of Harris's desk. He was too angry to worry about the fact he was still dressed in hospital blues. Bella sat quietly in the chair Eddie generally used. She was pale and wan, and clad in a hospital dressing gown, but he still wanted her there to read anything the administrators might show him. Harris entered the room and locked the door behind him.

"He's sedated now."

"This is an outrage!"

"Hold your horses." Harris set his stethoscope on his desk. "He's going home."

"But—"

"No question of it." Harris leaned against his desk and sighed. "I hope it's only nerves, but…"

"But what?"

"His heart is bad."

Eddie felt as though the floor had dropped out from under him. "What?"

"Some men, most men, acquire the diagnosis of neurasthenia because they present with tachychardia that lasts past the moment of danger."[iv]

"What's that?" Eddie asked.

"Tachychardia is a fast-beating of the heart. It's generally benign."

"Anyone on a battlefield is going to present with it," Bella added. "It can be caused by anxiety."

"It can also be a pre-existing condition that causes anxiety. When it lasts a long time, we call it Soldier's Heart Syndrome."

A heart syndrome? That didn't sound good. "And Emmett has that?"

"Well, I hope so."

Eddie felt his forehead crease. "You hope so?"

"I picked up a murmur. It may be temporary, but…"

"Oh, no."

"I checked his records and there's no mention of it. It's a moderate murmur so it could be the sign of something serious. In the long term, probably not right away."

"Tell me everything."

"He may have valvular disease, which is secondary to rheumatic heart disease. Do you know if he's ever had rheumatic fever?"[v]

Eddie shook his head. "My own sister died of scarlet fever. It's related, isn't it?"

"I'm sorry to hear that. Yes, rheumatic fever is a consequence of scarlet fever. I know it's pandemic in the Infantry. Since he's never taken hospital leave, hopefully he's avoided the infection." Harris stood. "As I said, Emmett's murmur may be nothing. It may just be temporary. A symptom of panic. But we're going to use it anyway."

"Thank you. You will tell Emmett it's nothing to worry about , right?"

"No. But you will. Go now, before Ashby shows up."

"Yes, Sir!"

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Lieutenant Ashby glared down at Emmett, who was swaddled in hot blankets in his cot and mostly insensible to the goings-on. "Do you concur with this diagnosis, Director?"

Humphries shifted uneasily and brushed up against Eddie's sleeve. "I'm sorry to say it, but the man has a moderately severe heart murmur. He cannot be trusted to perform adequately in battle." He did not say that Emmett could drop dead in the middle of shouting orders, but he didn't need to.

"And why did you not bring this up when I met with you to discuss his rehabilitation?" Ashby snapped.

"Many men have heart murmurs and suffer no harm, Lieutenant, but if this man had a murmur when I last examined him, I missed it. One cannot miss it now; it's perfectly distinct. You can listen to it yourself, if you wish."

"I do wish."

Humphries arranged his stethoscope on Emmett's chest and listened, then angled the metal earpieces toward Ashby. "It's a murmur in systole. Ba-da bump, ba-da bump. Do you hear it?"

Ashby sighed and straightened. "I will have to write up a letter of discharge. May I use your office?"

"Use mine," Harris said cheerfully. "How long do you need?"

"Twenty minutes."

Half an hour later, Eddie was leaning over Emmett holding a clipboard. "Sign this, Cap, and then we can go home." Emmett didn't open his eyes. "Emmett." Eddie gave him a nudge. "This is your honourable discharge letter. Sign it." He placed a pen in Emmett's hand and felt his fingers curl around it.

"If he can't sign off, we can't discharge him," Humphries said softly.

"Sign it, Emmett. Trust me. Do it now."

Emmett opened his eyes and scrawled his name across the page. Eddie hoped to God that the signature was close enough to the dotted line to count.

Harris tapped the paper. "Now initial here and here." Emmett's hand moved across the page. "Good enough," Harris said, and turned to Eddie. "He's not going to trust anyone but you now. This place is bad for him. How soon can you get him out?"

"How soon will my clothes be back from the laundry?"

Harris rang the bell and Katy hurried in. "Yes, Doctor?"

"Is last night's laundry back yet?"

"Not yet, Sir, but I expect it within the hour."

"Kindly bring Lieutenant Masen's clothes as soon as possible."

"Yes, Doctor."

"And help Mrs. Masen to dress. I will prepare some prescriptions and the hospital discharge papers now. Please ensure that the medications are dispensed before these patients leave the hospital."

"Yes, Doctor."

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The Bigginses were waiting patiently in the lobby for Bella and Eddie. "What news?" Mama Biggins asked, wringing her hands. Eddie pushed back his hair.

"I don't know why, but Harris is nervous about Emmett's continued presence here. He says it's due to Emmett's anxiety but he kept glancing toward the door. I know it's going to be difficult to care for Em while Bella's incapacitated, but the Brass has threatened to send him to Edinburgh for treatment."

"What kind of treatment?" Papa Biggins asked.

"Probably more electroshock."

"That's a good thing, isn't it? Might help him."

Eddie shook his head. "It's barbaric. He has burns all over."

"It isnae meant to leave marks," Bella said. "Thon doctor electrocuted him."

"Oh, dear," Papa Biggins said.

"Should we go home and bring the boys some mufties, Eddie?" Mama Biggins asked.

"No time. I want to pack up their kit and move out. We only need wait for the prescriptions and the discharge papers."

Behind Eddie, Harris's door swung open. Harris waved a paper. "Eddie, take these with you. They're all discharged."

"Thank you." Eddie took the papers and turned to go, but Harris caught him by the arm.

"From the hospital, not the Army. Take Emmett now, even if it means you must return for the prescriptions."

"What's wrong?"

"Out of sight, out of mind."

"Pardon?"

"Morton's kicking up a fuss. Wants another crack at him. And Ashby's due back to collect the papers at eleven. I want Emmett and Ashby gone before Morton notices."

"That's in… ten minutes!" Papa Biggins boomed.

"When do you expect me back at work?" Eddie asked.

"We'll discuss it tomorrow. Go."

"Mama Biggins, please wait here with Bella." Eddie removed his wife's hand from his arm and passed her into the care of their friend. Then he raced up the stairs with Papa Biggins on his heels, and burst into the officers' room. "Imshee!"[vi] He snatched up Em's kit and began to stuff his small possessions inside. Jasper scrambled to his feet and emptied his own drawer into the bag.

"What's up?"

"Lock and load. We need to be out of this building in two minutes."

"Shit." Jazz scrambled into his boots.

"Incoming. We need to get Cap downstairs now."

"He's out cold. I'll carry him. Bring what you can." Jazz lifted Emmett into a fireman's carry. Em didn't stir.

Katy's heels clicked across the floor. "I have your clothes, Lieutenant."

"No time. I'll send a boy tomorrow." Eddie tossed Bella's tartan shawl at Cap and Jazz, and hefted both men's knapsacks. Although at least thirty pounds lighter without ammo, each pack was still a substantial weight.

Katy shoved a small sack against Eddie's chest. "Prescriptions." She poked her head out the door. "The coast is clear."[vii]

"Go!" Eddie said. He and Jazz hurried down the grand staircase and scuttled across the foyer.

"What's up, Lieutenant?" Private Marshall called from his place on the couch.

"You haven't seen us!"

"Righty-o, mate."

Papa Biggins liberated one of the packs from Eddie and their party ran outside. Amazingly, a taxicab was waiting at the foot of the hospital steps.

"Cab for Biggins?" the driver asked cheerfully. Jazz practically fell into the back with Emmett. The Bigginses piled in after them. Eddie passed Jasper the pack he was carrying.

"God bless Harris." Eddie sat and pulled Bella down onto his lap. Her skirt, and that of Mama Biggins, blanketed the legs of all four men. "Twenty-seven Market Street, on the double!" The cab screeched away from the curb.

"Am I aiding an escape?" the driver asked with a toothy grin.

"For all intents and purposes," Eddie admitted. "Any sign of them, men?"

"I dinnae see anyone follow us out, Eddie," Bella said.

"Don't tell anyone you picked us up," Eddie cautioned the driver. "There's a mad doctor in there. Burned my patient. Gave no respect to this poor Old Sweat despite his heroic service."

"Good lord! Where yer taking him, then?"

"Home with me."

"I'll have yer home in a jiffy, gov. Yer can count on me to keep quiet."[viii]

"Good. Fast as you dare."

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[i] Peter Pan first appeared as an infant in J.M. Barrie's book The Little White Bird in 1902. His publisher extracted those chapters and sold them as a short story, The Boy Who Wouldn't Grow Up, in 1904. Barrie turned the story into a full length novel called Peter Pan and Wendy in 1911.

[ii] Neurologist Adolph Kussmaul coined the term word blindness in 1878. In 1887, opthamologist Rudolph Berlin coined the name and definition of dyslexia. The condition was informally called congenital word blindness. It would not be until 1925 that neurologist Samuel Orton would identify a reasonable cause and course of treatment for dyslexia. Many of the methods of Berlin and Orton are still in use today.

[iii] Hard-nose(d): From 1885-90 this expression was used to indicate a person who was stubborn, intractable and rigid. Often, it was used to describe a person who was down-to-earth and was therefore complimentary. By 1927, it was commonly used in comparison to a hard-shelled bomb or soft-shelled bullet and the meaning gradually migrated to mean a person who was tough and relentless. Still currently in use, the term may be applied to things as well as people, eg- 'a hard-nosed report'. In such cases, it means a severe, practical, harshly realistic assessment.

[iv] Tachycardia is an irregular, rapid heartbeat. Anxiety can occur secondary to tachycardia because it is very unpleasant to feel the heart beating rapidly. Conversely, tachychardia can occur as a result of anxiety.

[v] Valvular heart disease: a form of cardiac disease in which the back pressure behind a narrowed valve can cause the atrium to dilate. This would trigger episodes of tachycardia.

Often, men with heart murmurs were accepted into the military as doctors didn't know any better. A heart murmur could well be benign, but few doctors were skilled enough to identify murmurs that indicated congenital defects or a build-up of plaque. Before the 1950s, there was no such thing as a "heart attack." People who died from them were reported to have suffered "sudden death."

Rheumatic fever is an inflammatory disease that can develop as a complication of inadequately treated strep throat or scarlet fever. Heart disease, a by-product of rheumatic fever, could kill someone very quickly before the advent of antibiotics.

Strep throat and scarlet fever are caused by an infection of streptococcus bacteria. During this era, there were no antibiotics so many people died of strep infections. My own grandmother contracted scarlet fever during her childhood, and although she survived, her parents burned all her possessions, including bedding, clothing and toys, to eliminate the infection from spreading.

[vi] Imshee: Go away, to go away, to make go away.

[vii] The coast is clear: This expression was first documented and dated to Shakespeare's Henry VI, Act I, in 1591:

MAYOR:
See the coast clearand then we will depart.
[Aside] Good God, these nobles should such stomachs bear!
I myself fight not once in forty year.

[viii] Jiffy: a moment. First documented in 1785 as thieves' cant for the speed of lightning. Adopted 100 years later as the official, scientific speed it takes for light to travel 1 cm.

︻┳═一

Well, it's been a long month. Anthony's brother passed away just before Christmas. Frank was 53 and left behind a wife, two sons and a daughter. We had my M-i-L with us for ten days so she wasn't alone. Everything went smoothly. Now I must pick up where I left off. I'll be postponing the release of Cats & Dogs I as I have not done my second edit. We're all okay here. Hopefully, 2017 will give us a break. Happy New Year, my friends. May God grant us courage, wisdom and serenity.