A.N. Please listen to the song named like that by Phil Collins when reading this chapter. It is important for your author that you do. Arigato.

A.N. 2. Sorry for the long wait - I was fist lacking the muse, then lazy, then tired from work, then went on a vacation by the sea (with no internet!), then went to the ANIFEST in my city!, then tired again... Yeah, you got the idea. The plan is to have some more engagements these days, so I'll probably BE very busy AND tired, but I'll try to post the next chapie sooner ;)

A.N. 3 This chapter was edited my Kinkylittlewolf. Luv u babe. Hope you can still like me too…

Chapter 25 – In the air tonight

Izumo's POV

I sighed, rolling onto my back again and staring up at the ceiling. Another sleepless night it is then. No rest for the wicked. I smiled bitterly at the thought.

I stood up, walked to the French windows, rested my head against the cool glass, and closed my eyes for a second. Then, after a few seconds, I opened them again and looked into the night.

I love the kind of calm that only night can bring; the silence, the chilly peacefulness…

"I can feel it… coming in the air tonight…"

But there was something else, hanging in the air, tonight of all nights. Tension - some kind of nervous expectation…

I sighed again, opening my closet to grab a hoodie and some sweatpants. I pulled them on quickly and found my sneakers already by the door – the habit was set in already, by many sleepless nights.

I stepped outside, taking a deep breath of the night. Yes, it still calmed me, which was only one of the reasons I had begun running almost every night.

The other reason was that I had pretty much given up all my other hobbies and ways to let off the steam.

I pulled up the hood of the sweatshirt and began running without any real destination in mind. Breathing became easier with each movement of my body, despite the physical effort. After all, it wasn't a physical effort that kept me awake at night…

"Well, if you told me you were drowning
I would not lend a hand
I've seen your face before my friend
But I don't know if you know who I am
Well, I was there and I saw what you did
I saw it with my own two eyes
So you can wipe off the grin, I know where you've been
It's all been a pack of lies…"

A thunder echoed from above. Huh… I hadn't seen any lightning. I just kept on moving, trying not to think of anything… Not of his face, that time, on the beach.

"I cannot hate you."

How could he not and the fact that I didn't deserve this much weren't gonna stop the hope and the silly smile I could feel on my face even now…

"I told her I might still be… have … feelings… for you."

My heart, not bothered anymore by the nightly training it was forced to endure recently, skipped a beat at the memory of his words. But my stupid smile was wiped away with the memory of what he had said next…

"Not yet. I'm sorry, not yet…. I can't…"

No, of course not. How could he? Come back willingly, to the monster that I was? Why? I think it probably would have bothered me more if he had walked willingly back into my arms…

A roar sounded nearby but I paid no attention – it was probably just another thunder. But then I was blinded by a light coming from the street right in front of me. So it couldn't have been lightning…? Shielding my eyes, I tried to look up…

Kotetsu's POV

It was cold. And dark. Too dark. I didn't like darkness. I had too many uncomfortable memories that included darkness: Kiba's tensed form, waiting for me after the beach party… the darkness of the forest where the enemy rested unaware of the predators in the trees… the darkness in Izumo's flat, the darkness I had stared into with empty eyes while he thrust in me…

I shook my head, trying to clear my mind and finally find some peace.

I couldn't. His tortured face was all that came to my mind, making me angry. What? Didn't I have the right to be angry with him?.! Why couldn't he JUST look guilty, the way he was supposed to be, instead of tortured, the way I was supposed to look?.! I was the victim! ME! The one who took it from behind, against his will! Why the hell was HE looking hurt?.!.?.!

But I just couldn't shake off the images of his pale haunted face as he walked around in the station… his tall frame, now bent over. The body that had obviously lost weight. The lifeless eyes…His eyes bothered me the most - that last time on the beach they had looked at me with so much hope…

I couldn't stand it anymore; I jumped up from my bed, pulled on some clothes and grabbed the keys for my bike. Insomnia, meet my way of dealing with you.

Since I had found it was a whole new experience compared to driving during the day, driving at night had turned out to be a new way of relieving some of the tension There was no one on the streets at night. No one but me…

I caught myself remembering that first day at the station; his face was still haunted for other reasons back then...

"Well I remember, I remember don't worry…
How could I ever forget, it's the first time, the last time we ever met.
But I know the reason why you keep your silence up, no you don't fool me…
The hurt doesn't show; but the pain still grows
It's no stranger to you or me…"

I came back to myself just in time to see the figure running right in front of me, just seconds away from being hit by me and my bike. I turned to the left, pulled over, and jumped off quickly.

"Where the hell are you running?.! Streets ain't empty enough for you?.! You have a death wish or something?.!"

The guy looked up… Huge eyes, almost black now, stared at me as we both gasped.

He looked like a fucking lost kid - his hair was still messy under the hood, as if he had also just rolled out off his bed because he couldn't sleep – something the dark circles under his eyes confirmed.

I wanted to laugh bitterly. What was the chance of running into the only one I wasn't prepared to meet, in the middle of the night, on an empty street, in an abandoned part of the town…?.!

The surprise in his eyes quickly turned into wistfulness, then guilt, self-hatred, wistfulness again, pleading… He opened his mouth.

I didn't let him… talk, beg, or cry. I wasn't thinking, just acted on my instincts.

I grabbed his hoodie and pushed him roughly to the nearest wall. He whimpered. I didn't care. I smashed our lips together, cursing at all the fucking memories. Fuck them all, I'm making new ones tonight!

As my knee found place between his legs and my tongue pushed past his lips the skies above us tore open and heavy rain began pouring down. The tension was finally relieved…

A.N. Just to warn you - smutt is coming up, but NOT right up next ;) Be patient (and make yourselves profiles at AdultFanFiction . net. Just hinting... strongly :D)