Part 25- Twenty Questions

"Lucas," Sami breathed. Her eyes locked hard on his. Like Will, he looked at her—not at her improving-but-decimated body.

As much as she wanted to stare into him forever and pretend that they'd never been apart, she needed to begin the process of repairing their family. "I have a thousand questions for you."

Lucas glanced nervously at the door. "I'm not supposed to be in here. I think security will throw me out before you get to a thousand." Sami's insides twisted at seeing him so uncomfortable. Lucas might have left scheming behind when he'd become a father, but it wasn't like him to be timid in the face of authority.

Or maybe it was. Three years for her, she knew, had been thirteen for him. And she wasn't sure how long he'd been in prison. She'd been to prison, too. She knew that it was hard to get used to committing the most minor infractions (and everything was an infraction) once you left.

"Don't worry. We'll tell security that it wasn't your fault, that I made you come in."

"You made me?"

"I made you. I can be very irresistible." To her surprise, she heard her voice take on a flirtatious tone. "They would believe it. They'll probably even let you stay all day and all night, telling me everything."

Lucas laughed. Sami wasn't sure whether to be offended or thrilled at the sound, so she put off that decision until later. "We can start with you telling me what's so funny."

"I always tell Allie—everyone always tells Allie—how much she reminds me of you, how much she looks like you. But this time, it's you reminding me of her." He flashed a smile that made Sami glad that she was already lying down. "It's nice."

"How am I reminding you of Allie?"

"The first day she came to stay with me, she wanted to know everything, all at once. For a while we had a rule that she got one big question a day so she'd have time to digest what I was telling her without getting overwhelmed." Sami could feel the warmth of the memory. It was good to know that Allie and Lucas and Will had each other.

"I'm a lot older than Allie, so I think I should get a lot more than one question. Maybe a hundred?"

"Maybe twenty. Twenty questions, that sounds right. They should make a game and call it that."

Sami nodded her agreement. Either Lucas would be removed from her room before they got to twenty, or he would lose count and keep answering.

Still, she didn't know where to start. Is there any chance you could love me again? was her first thought, but it wasn't the most important thing. She didn't know how to phrase her fears for Johnny and Allie, and she wasn't even sure how much time Lucas had spent with them.

That was the starting point.

"When did you get out of prison?"

"October."

Sami blinked. "October, October? October of this past fall, October?"

"Yes. So, you're up to what, three questions?"

"Clarification doesn't count as its own question!" Sami snapped. Fury and indignation were pounding through her veins. Lucas had been in prison for thirteen years, and he hadn't even killed EJ. EJ had never served a day in prison, and he had… "Thirteen years, Lucas. They locked you up for thirteen years?"

"Technically, I still got out early." Lucas shrugged, as if there was nothing more to be said about it.

"Did they—did they hurt you in prison? Did they yell at you, did they beat you up, did they…"

"No one did to me what Alan Harris did to you, if that's what you're asking," said Lucas flatly. "There's always a lot of yelling, and there are always fights, but I was never hurt very badly. And that does count as your second question."

Abruptly, Sami realized that Lucas was limiting the questions as much to protect himself as to protect her. He didn't want to relive any of things she wanted to hear about. "You can pass on some of the questions," she told him quietly. "We'll skip to the next one."

Lucas ignored her. "What's number three?"

Sami pressed on. The next question was obvious, and it might offend Lucas, but she absolutely had to have an answer for everyone's sake. "Have you been off the wagon since you got out? Or… while you were in?"

"No, and no. I was tempted when I first got out, it seemed like I saw the stuff everywhere—of course I saw it more than when I was there—and it seemed like everything would be easier if I… but no, the answer is no. And since we found Allie I haven't wanted to."

Lucas' answer stayed businesslike and almost emotionless. Sami tried to make her questions follow suit.

"How and when did you get Allie and Johnny here?"

"Philip. I owe him… well, not everything, because I owe Will and—he had people look for them. Allie ran away and lucky for us she ran right to Jack and Jennifer. She was at their house when Philip's people caught up with her. That was in November. We got Johnny about six weeks later, after Allie helped narrow down the search."

"How's Allie dealing with what EJ did to her?"

This time, Lucas' façade cracked, but it was with wonder rather than pain. "It blows my mind how well she's handling everything. She really rolls with the punches, you know? So strong, so resilient. She doesn't let anything that happened stop her. She goes to her counseling sessions, she's doing good at school, she—she's amazing. She was quieter when she first got here, she seemed really sensitive, but I'm seeing that less and less."

"And I don't need to ask whether she has you wrapped around her little finger, because I already know that."

Lucas smirked. "If you think you're so sure."

Sami wasn't convinced. "There's not much I'm sure of, but that's one of the exceptions. How is Johnny dealing with finding out you're his father?"

And then, as unexpectedly as it had come, the happiness was gone.

"He isn't," said Lucas flatly. "Won't admit that it's true."

"How are you dealing with it?"

He sighed. "One day at a time."

"How did you find out?"

"We always knew, didn't we? We had him tested before he was born, and so did Stefano when he kidnapped you, remember? You were pregnant and he was going to surgically remove the twins and use their bodies to—"

"I was there for that part. You don't need to remind me."

"I think I do. I think I needed someone to remind me, because somehow we just took EJ's word for it when he told us Johnny was his."

"The tests are more accurate after babies are born!" Sami protested.

"Tests are never more accurate when DiMeras are around. Nick found—"

"Nick?"

"My cousin Nick. He got into this whole undercover thing to catch someone who was interfering with samples at the lab, and he traced it all the way back to Allie and Johnny. He told me the details but I wasn't paying that much attention. He found out by accident. Even when we found Johnny, we didn't think to have him tested. We tested him against Belle so she could get injunctive custody. If your next question is how so many people could be so stupid for so long, I don't have an answer."

"That wasn't my next question," said Sami softly.

"Well?"

"Does Johnny know that EJ raped me and that's why we thought EJ was his father?"

"He doesn't believe it, but he knows."

"Why did you tell him?"

"I didn't. Allie did."

"Why did you tell Allie?"

"Because I had to tell her that—oh, this is good. EJ had them convinced that they aren't twins. The story was that Johnny was his son by his wife who died, and Allie was his stepdaughter by you. When I told Allie that Johnny was her brother, but that I was her father… well, she has a decent grounding in biology and she knew how unlikely that was, and what you would have had to have done—"

Sami held up her hand. "Stop. I don't need to know that my only daughter was speculating about my sex life." She only spared a second to dwell on the embarrassment. "Wait, Johnny thought I wasn't his mother? Does he still think that?"

"That's probably the one thing he's accepted. He likes the idea of being Allie's twin. I think he must remember you, too. Allie does."

"How much does Allie remember?"

"I don't know. What I know for sure is that she remembers the night you got hurt very clearly."

Sami made a face. "Out of all the things she could remember. Do Allie and Johnny—are they close?"

"They're very close. She's the only one he cares about."

"Does he know that EJ… what EJ did to her?"

"Like everything else. She told him and he accused us of brainwashing her."

"But they—she doesn't mind that he doesn't believe her?"

"I'm not sure how it works. They don't talk about it, like some people don't talk about religion and politics. But she loves him completely, even if he doesn't make it easy. I guess the same is true for him, from his warped perspective."

"Did you just call our son warped?"

"No, and that's number seventeen."

Sami had forgotten to count, and she had no idea if she was really up to seventeen. But she heard the warning: I'm at the end of my rope with Johnny, and you're in no position to criticize.

"What can I do to make this thing with Johnny easier on both of you?"

Lucas opened his mouth, and then closed it. "That's not a question I expected you to ask."

"Seems like the most important one, though, doesn't it? I mean, it does. You can't count that as nineteen."

"No," Lucas agreed. "Look, if I knew how to get through to Johnny I would have done it by now. But I'm the embodiment of everything he hates, and on top of it I keep him on a short leash because it's the only way to keep him safe."

"How do you mean?"

"I mean, give that kid money and internet access and he'd be on his way to a DiMera compound in some country that isn't on the map in two seconds. Can't really stop the internet access because he needs it for school, but I limit it as much as I can."

"He'd leave Allie?"

"I don't know. I know he's hurting—I know how torn up I was when I found out that Bill Horton was my father, and I was a lot older and that did a lot less to change my life. But Johnny is so resourceful and calculating and he's so willing to hurt people to get his way—"

"When you say 'hurt people'—"

"On Christmas Eve Ciara punched him in the face because he told her she was a replacement for Zack—a poor replacement, that's what it was. It wasn't what he said, although that was bad enough. It was the superior, smug way he said it. I see a lot of EJ in him and it terrifies me that we might not be able to get it out." Lucas straightened up and glanced around, as if looking for the source of his words. "And Sami, don't forget what he did to you when you woke up. You'd been comatose for years and had just had experimental brain surgery. He knew exactly how dangerous it was to upset you, and he came in and told you all about the DiMeras changing the paternity records and how he wished they'd stayed changed."

Sami sat bolt upright. "No, Lucas, he didn't. He… he mentioned something else and I asked if he was my son—joking—and then he told me—well, he didn't tell me, he thought I knew."

Lucas sat unmoved.

"You don't believe me."

"I appreciate that it's your instinct to think the best of your son."

"You weren't there. He was scared and upset and his hands were so cold—"

"He wouldn't wait in the waiting room with us. He went out to the parking lot instead. Of course his hands were cold, it was January out there."

"And you just let him? Maybe you wouldn't even let him have gloves because you were afraid he'd pawn them for money to get back to EJ?"

"That's ridiculous! We checked on him. He was fine. He could have walked back into the hospital any time he wanted, just like anyone else."

"He wanted you to come get him!"

"No, he didn't. You're underestimating Johnny. He's not some little wounded bird—"

"He's what? A DiMera?"

"Too many questions. You're over your limit."

"Don't you dare! Lucas, Johnny—"

"Needs you. I know that. But—"

"There are no buts," said Sami firmly.

And her intention to tell Lucas that she loved him, and her plan to find out how he could love her again, evaporated. She'd spent three years in EJ's prison of a London townhouse yearning for Lucas. She had changed during that time, and Lucas had changed, too. Maybe she'd outgrown him. Maybe she only loved the idea of him.

Even her sympathy for Lucas retreated to the back of her heart. Johnny was more important. She'd been the black sheep of her family, the difficult child in a sea of perfect siblings. Johnny wasn't going to feel that way.

For an instant, she thought Lucas was going to walk out on that note, and she didn't care.

Then Lucas said "I need you," and all of her dreams slammed back to the forefront. She could help Johnny and remarry Lucas at the same time. After all, he was Johnny's father.

"You… what?" she whispered breathlessly.

"I need you to help me with Johnny. Allie, too. Your family needs you. So don't get too worked up now, okay? It won't help them."

"Right," she agreed. And telling him she loved him didn't seem to follow very well. So she didn't.

TBC