Chapter 25: The One Thing He Didn't Know

Max PoV

"We could turn Max into a Vampire."

I stood behind the door, terrified of the reactions in the room I couldn't see.

Seth pulled me into the living room. Every eye snapped to me. I saw Fang's eyes flicker to me and Seth's joined hands, and then to my face. Pain flashed in his eyes and, somehow, it hurt me too. I tore my hand away from Seth's, ignoring the pain I saw in his eyes.

This was so confusing.

"You what?" Emmett asked. "Have you not listened to a word of what we've been telling you?"

"Yes, I have. And that's why I think it's the perfect solution! The Volturi would have no reason to chase Max anymore, and she wouldn't be in danger from all the people chasing her normally, either!" Seth replied, sounding like he actually believed it was a good plan. Heck, I would have believed him if it wasn't for the fact that I was the one who told him to lie.

"I'm afraid it isn't that simple Seth. You see becoming a vampire is very painful, and it's not something you can reverse. Max would never be normal- well, herself- again."

"But she wouldn't really be that different, would she? I mean, she's already more advanced physically and mentally than normal humans, her eyesight's better, and her hearing, strength, reactions, everything."

"Yes, but they would be developed even more if she was to become a vampire, making her an even more valuable asset to whomever is chasing her."

"Yes, but-"

"I'm sorry to interrupt you Seth, but you're both talking like Max isn't here." Esme scolded them gently. "It's her life you're talking about it, so don't you think she should perhaps get a say in what happens to it, hmm?"

They both nodded duly and one and all turned to me.

I swallowed and tried to look scared, which wasn't actually that hard.

"Max, sweetheart? What do you think?" Esme encouraged me when I didn't speak.

"I-I-I, uh..." Yeah, I'm totally more advanced than normal humans, or... maybe... not.

"Honey you look tired, why don't you get some rest, while we talk to Seth about it?"

I nodded, that sounded good, in fact I was more than happy to. I smiled gently as I collapsed into a squishy armchair, sinking deep into its spongy cushions.

"I really think this is a good idea..."

His voice drifted off as the group moved their debate to the kitchen.

Doing an automatic scan of the room told me that Fang had disappeared, probably into the wall, and that Esme was sitting on the couch opposite me reading a book. Alice and Jasper were sitting in silence, discretely holding hands.

My eyes drifted shut, but I didn't sleep. I couldn't sleep; I was too scared.

No, I wasn't scared of the vampires eating me in my sleep, or that the Volturi would get here as I slept. Nope. I was scared of sleeping.

Yep, that's it. Laugh. The great, fearless Maximum Ride, who fights big scary wolfish things, braved an arctic snow blizzard, flew through a hurricane, and is about to walk to death by her own memories, is scared to fall asleep. I sound like a little kid whose mother's died and the doctors said 'She's just sleeping.' Seriously though, who would tell a little kid that?

Okay. Note to self; stop doing Nudge-like monologues in your head.

I vaguely noticed the voices from the kitchen getting louder. Esme excused herself from the room and hurried in to see what was wrong. Jasper was called through a second later.

The real reason I was scared was the nightmares. They were freaky before, but now...

Apparently what I dreamt is exactly like what this Arrow guy seems to have in store for me, to the finest detail. Except, of course, we won't be in a weirdly isolation-tank-ish type place when it happens.

I sighed and shifted in the suddenly too squishy arm chair. It felt like it was going to swallow me whole.

Maybe I'm just never happy.

Feeling eyes on me, I looked up and saw Fang watching me. He was standing by the door, motioning for me to follow him. Seth was still deep in discussion with the Cullens in the kitchen, so no one was in the room to notice us slipping silently out the door. Well no one but Alice, who winked at me.

We didn't actually go anywhere, simply sat on the porch, staring into the black ink sky. The sun was long gone and the stars had started to come out. They shone like diamonds sewn into the velvet navy blue atmosphere.

If you tell anyone I was that soppy, I will hunt you down and lock you in a cupboard with a hyper Nudge and a Gazzy who has been fed beans, then get Angel to read your mind and announce to everyone in your school all your deepest darkest secrets, even ones you didn't know yourself.

In my trance, I had completely forgotten that Fang was sitting next to me, a fact which I was suddenly reminded of when his arm slipped round my waist, and his hand began rubbing under my wings.

"What's up?" He aske casually.

"The sky, the stars, a couple of ninjas." I replied, ignoring the weird look I got.

"Okay... I meant with you."

I raised an eyebrow at him, deciding I was going to play the silent one and see how he liked it.

"You seem..." He searched for the right word, "Off. Your plan was amazing, yes, but not a Max plan. There was no edge to it. You seemed... distracted."

He had noticed?

"Yes, I noticed. What's going on that you're not telling me?"

I wanted to tell him, so that he could stop me from doing it. Stop me from killing myself through what had to be the worst possible way that I could think of. I shivered just thinking about it.

"You cold?" Fang asked immediately.

I looked up at him, the concern not quite hidden in his almost completely blank expression. He cared about me. Fang was the one who looked after me when I was too wrapped up to notice there was even anything wrong. He knew how to get to me, and when to do it. He knew all my fears, things that most people didn't know existed. He knew me, the real me, not the face I put on to the outside world, but the one I kept hidden.

I shook my head.

"Do you wanna talk about it?" Fang asked, knowing something else was up.

"Not really, no."

He nodded slightly, knowing I would tell him sooner or later.

"Thanks." I whispered.

But the one thing he didn't know was that I wasn't planning on having much of a later.

Sighing, I closed my eyes and rested my head on Fang's shoulder. His arm tightened round me, and I felt his hand stroke my cheek lightly. Smiling contently, I let myself feel happy and safe for a short while, I let myself slip into the land between life and death. The land of dreams or, more realistically in my case, nightmares.