AN: Thank you all for reading. I do have an epilogue to this one, but I'm not sure if I'm going to post it or not. I know this one was quite AU for Caryl, but I hope you enjoyed it.

Conclusion

Daryl was due home, he could walk through the door any second, and Carol already felt like she was going to be sick. She had no idea how their chat was going to go once she told him. But how? How do you tell someone you're not in love with them?

She had played the words over and over in her head. She'd memorized them like she did her lines. But they always sounded terrible. Sometimes Carol thought she sounded cold. Other times the words sounded too planned or even a bit forced. They just never sounded genuine and compassionate, which was exactly how she wanted them to come out.

Maybe I should just throw everything away and wing it, she thought. But she didn't have time to decide one way or the other because the door swung open and Daryl came flying in. "Okay, tell me," he blurted out, spotting her as he kicked aside his suitcase. "I've been going crazy… the whole day… the whole flight… just tell me Carol. Are we through? Is it over…"

Fuck, he had the saddest look in his eyes already, mixed with fear, and she hadn't even spoke yet. "Daryl... " she started. But the words were gone. Everything she'd rehearsed and learned over and over was gone. That had never happened to her before. Once she had her lines down they were there. She could remember lines from movies she'd done 10 years ago. Carol started to panic and the next thing she knew her eyes were wet.

"Jesus… this is it. This is really it…" Daryl muttered, looking defeated. "I really thought after you left yesterday that… Fuck," he cut himself off. "I knew I shouldn't have got my hopes up." His voice was getting louder. He was upset. He was working himself into a frenzy and she still hadn't spoke a thing other than his name. "Why am I so fucking stupid?"

Carol felt tears trickling down her cheeks. She had to stop him… she had to say something. "Daryl," she tried again. But he kept muttering loudly, pacing back and forth. "Daryl," she said louder. The third time she yelled and finally he stopped talking and looked at her. Once again she panicked and said the wrong thing. "I'm not in love with you."

"I fucking gathered that," he hissed. "You really felt the need to interrupt me and reaffirm that?" Daryl's eyes flashed and there was a little glimpse of anger amidst the hurt.

"No… no…" Carol said, reaching out to him with trembling hands. "It's not coming out right, dammit, I'm sorry." She tried to hold his hand but Daryl pulled away. "Please, would you hear me out before you react? Daryl, please? It's not what you think."

"You don't love me," he stated with a shrug. "Nothing else matters. I mean, what? You wanna just be friends with benefits or something? Because believe it or not… I don't think I can fucking handle that."

"No… that's not…" Carol tried.

"Or you just want to go back to the way we were? Or maybe you want nothing to do with me? Are you gonna move out? Have you already packed? Maybe your stuff is gone…" he looked around. "Maybe…"

Carol had had enough. "Holy fuck you would shut up," she yelled. She had no idea how things had escalated to that point, but it was time for him to listen. Carol grabbed his wrist and pulled. He resisted briefly, but the second forceful tug had him following her to the living room. She stopped and shoved him to a seating position on the couch. "You are going to sit there and listen," she seethed. "Not a fucking word until I'm finished, you got it?"

She thought about sitting down, but she decided she could use the extra leverage of hovering over him. "So I said I'm not in love with you…" Daryl made some kind of scoffing sound and she glared at him until he stopped. "Everything has happened so fast…" she sighed. "We were friends… yeah, we flirted, but we were just friends… and then… we started having sex… and I really hadn't even had a chance to get used to that and you tell me you love me…" Carol paused and looked at him. "Daryl, I don't love you like that…" He went to interrupt and she held up a finger. "But that doesn't mean I don't want to," she continued giving him a tiny smile.

"Wait, what?" Daryl looked stunned.

"I said… that even though I don't love you now it doesn't mean I don't want to fall in love with you," she whispered, stepping closer and reaching out her fingertips to brush his face. "I just need some time to wrap my mind around this whole thing." He leaned into her touch. "I need time to see you as more than the friend I've known for so many years. But… it's there… I know it's there," she said softly, a tear of a different kind rolling down her cheek. "I just need some time to understand it." She stroked his face and dropped to her knees in front of him. "What do you think? Can we try? Are you willing to try even after…"

"Yes," Daryl responded enthusiastically. "Yes… a chance, that's all I wanted," he replied with a smile. He was so handsome when he smiled like that and Carol felt her heart flutter. Now that she knew how he felt and was starting to see him differently she had no doubt it wouldn't take long before she felt the same.

Daryl leaned forward to kiss her, but Carol stopped him. "Before we start that… because we both know where it will lead… I want to show you something first and then ask you something." She took his hand this time, since she didn't have to drag him, and led him to the other side of the living room, stopping in front of the painting he'd done recently - the one he said she'd inspired.

"Yeah, I'm gonna get it framed and hang it… just haven't got around to it," Daryl muttered.

"When I saw it the day you painted it," she started. "I loved it right away. I could see all the emotions you were trying to convey… except one. I knew I was missing something, but you refused to tell me. You knew it was gonna drive me crazy." She gave him a sideways glance and saw that he was quite captivated and clearly intrigued with where she was going. "I looked at it so many times. Pretty much every time I was in this room. But it never came to me. Not until I came home from Portland… after you told me…" Carol met his eyes. "The second I saw the painting again, I knew… it's love. That's what I was missing. It was staring me right in the face and I couldn't see it. But you knew… you knew when you painted this that you were in love with me…" Her heart fluttered both from the romantic realization she'd come to and from nerves. "You knew even before we started having sex… So what I need to know is… when? When did you know you loved me? How long? How long have you felt this way and left me in the dark, completely clueless?"

Daryl sucked in a breath and shrugged slightly. "Remember I told you how we kissed at that party? I'm pretty sure it started that night," he admitted.

"Jesus," she whispered. That wasn't just a few weeks ago, that was months.

"I don't know that I knew what it was then," he spoke again. "And I tried really hard to make it go away. I fucked a lot of women, thinking it was just some mid-life thing I could fix… but the more girls I was with the more it made me want you." Daryl sighed. "So I tried the other way. I quit having sex and masturbated… a lot. But that didn't work either because every time my dick was in my hand, it was you on my mind." Carol couldn't help but smile at his honesty. That's just the way they were with each other and it would never change. "But the day you moved in here I knew for sure I was in love with you," He nodded as he spoke. "And once I knew… I just couldn't be with anyone else… felt like I was cheating."

"Oh and you've never cheated before?" Carol teased him.

He chuckled. "Okay, okay, you know I have. I've been a jerk to a lot of girls… but it wasn't just any girl - it was you. I've never been a jerk to you Carol and I promise I never will."

She believed him without a doubt. He had always treated her with respect and she knew he would continue to do so, even though their relationship was different and respecting her meant a completely different thing. "Come on," she said, taking his hand again.

"Now where are we going?" he asked.

"You know exactly where we're going," she replied over her shoulder.

"Oh, I only meant which bedroom," he said, sweeping her off her feet into his arms.

They ended up in his room. Carol thought she might be in for a tender and romantic lovemaking session. Quite honestly, it wasn't what she wanted, but she thought maybe it's what Daryl needed and she was okay with that. But he seemed to have something else in mind, which was a lot closer to the hard fuck she was hoping for. It was strange that even after such a special and sweet moment she just wanted him to take her and pound her. Carol was a bit embarrassed by what she desired, until he did exactly that. It simply reminded her that they were a good match sexually, which was important to both of them. She already knew they were a good match in many other ways too.

Somewhere in the middle Carol was struck with a strange urge she had honestly never felt with a man's dick in her. She wanted to be fucked in the ass. She knew all she had to do was say the word and she could have it. Daryl would be more than happy to oblige. It must have been a result of all the anal teasing he'd done in the past, mixed with the way he was spreading her cheeks apart while he fucked her, drawing her attention to other areas. As much as her body seemed to want it Carol's mind just wasn't ready. It still seemed so wrong and she worried it might hurt. So she forced herself to enjoy everything else that was happening and forget about her naughty urge. But she knew it was gonna happen, sooner rather than later. If he offered it and she was in the state she was currently in there was no way she could turn him down.

Something about being with Daryl made her feel so young, alive and completely crazy. He made her want to do strange things and enjoy things she never had before. He was liberating, even to a free spirit like herself. He was fearless and bold, which only made him even sexier. When she didn't come before he was through Daryl immediately went down on her until she did, without hesitation. It was so erotic to her that it made his job quick and easy. Carol truly appreciated the lengths he would go to to be absolutely sure she was fully satisfied.

They were lying side by side afterwards, fingers twisted together, when Daryl announced he needed a smoke before he could sleep. Carol watched him get up, throw on some pants and a hoodie, then grab a pack of smokes and leave with a promise to return quickly.

She lay quietly for a moment, but was struck with yet another strange urge. She needed to be close to him, even though he wasn't far away and would be back soon. It was crazy, but it didn't stop her from getting out of bed, finding one of his robes and slipping her feet into a pair of boobie slippers. Carol padded down the hall, through the living room and joined him on the balcony. "Hey," she said with a shy smile, gasping at the shock of cold as she stepped up beside him.

"Hey," he replied, before taking a long haul on the cigarette. The look on his face told Carol he understood exactly why she was there.

"You know, I didn't think I was gonna like living here, but if we're gonna be together..." Carol said as she snuggled closer to steal some of his body heat. "Guess I'll be spending a lot more time in the city."

Daryl wrapped an arm around her and exhaled away from her face. "I've said it before, but now that you're ready to embrace the city life... Welcome to New York.."

Carol looked out over the streets and cars and buildings below and she smiled. For the first time the slow paced country girl inside her allowed her to look at the bustling city with warmth, instead of contempt. If she hadn't come there to film her and Daryl may not have ended up where they were in their relationship. In a strange way she owed something to the vast metropolis spread out before her. Daryl loved living there and whether she was fully in love with him yet or not, she certainly loved being with him and New York had brought them together. Carol smiled and felt perfectly comfortable snuggled up to Daryl, despite the icy chill. Maybe the Big Apple wasn't so bad after all.

~The End~