Dreams Dwindle
Raven
"MMnmm…Where'm I?"
Images come into focus around me and I really wish I hadn't asked that question. The world is barren and desolate and twisted wraiths of stone dot the horizon…and I remember…I'm in hell.
"Raven? Is that you?"
Oh no.
I see it clearly now. He plans it out this way. Lets me see each friend. Gives them time to reassure me it's not my fault. Then kills them in front of me.
"Raven?"
I shouldn't go.
But I have to. I'm drawn to him. I can't fight it. Maybe I can save him. Maybe I can teleport us to another dimension. I have to try. Have to.
"Ra…ven?"
Robin's voice is strangled. He's in pain. Now I have to go.
"Robin? Where are you?"
"Behind the statue of the guy on his cell phone."
I move the statue gently out of the way and Robin's lying there, flat on the ground.
"What's wrong with you?" I float down beside him.
"Leg's broken, I think," he grimaces.
Indeed, the green clad leg is sticking out in entirely the wrong direction.
"Don't worry, I'll fix it," I tell him, placing my hands gently on the damaged limb. He shudders slightly but doesn't say anything. I concentrate… and…and…
"Powers aren't working. I'm sorry," I mutter with a sigh, letting go of him.
"S'okay. Have you seen the others?"
How could I tell him? We don't have that much time left, and it would…destroy him. And what he'd think of me…for letting it happen…
"No," my voice cracks slightly.
"Oh. Well, I'm sure they're okay. They can endure a lot. Good team…" he doesn't really seem to be talking to me, more to…I'm not sure. We sit in silence for a few minutes.
"We should go find them," he breaks it finally. "I just need some means of support. Hey, maybe you could teleport…oh right, your powers aren't working…need a stick or –yes!" He extracts his staff from his utility belt and extends it planting one end firmly on the ground, and slowly forcing himself up…I grab his shoulder so he doesn't fall, but don't pull him up.
"Robin…"
"Is something wrong?" he squints at me. "You're not blaming yourself for this, are you?"
"No," I humor him. "Guilt trips are your job."
"That sounds like something Beast Boy would say," he says with a smile.
"Listen, Robin. I just want to tell you that…you're a really good friend…and a good leader. The only thing that's wrong with you is that you're too hard on yourself."
"Oh…thanks," Robin stares at me. "Raven…is everything…?
"If anything happens…I want you to know…"
BAM. The earth explodes behind me and there he is, like he's been waiting for his cue offstage. Robin desperately tries to keep upright after the shockwave and I clench my fists.
"Go away!" I scream uselessly as Robin fumbles with his utility belt. "You want him, you'll have to go through me!"
In answer, Trigon reaches out with his giant hand, as if to knock me aside. I grab a finger and hitch myself up on it until I'm close enough I can sink my teeth hard into the soft pad of the digit. It's all I can think of to do. Robin calls out my name and throws a birdarang that slices off the tip of the finger next to me, which immediately regenerates.
"I'm…not…gonna…let you…hurt him," I grunt.
Oh, I'm not going to hurt him…
Suddenly a sickening electric jolt sizzles through my entire body and I fall to the ground. A current seems to flow through me, whipping up a whirlpool in my insides. My very soul is ripped away from me, the black thing darting out and flapping away like a bird fleeing a burning tree. My eyes stretch out painfully, my skin goes taut, I scream like a wounded animal and my cloak flashes a sick rainbow of colors and the eyes finally split into four…the cloak settles on red…
…you are.
"RAVEN!" Robin screams, stumbling haphazardly toward me in painful steps, aided by his staff. "RAVEN! Are you okay?"
I turn over and look at him with my four glowing red eyes, feeling nothing but hatred for the pathetic little wounded bird quivering over me.
"Better than ever," I sneer.
Kill him.
"Oh…no…" Robin takes a step backwards as I rise. "Raven! This is not you, Raven, this is NOT YOU. Come back, come on…"
" But it is me, Boy Wonder. This is what I've been trying to suppress, my true self. The pathetic little shell that is RAVEN is just a façade. And now I am free. I am my father's daughter."
"You…!" Robin screams up at my father. "Give her soul back you …You-"
He stops short when I slap him in the face, barely keeping upright as he stumbles.
" You are not to talk to my father that way. "
Robin's face twists into a look of rage and he extracts another staff from his utility belt, and swings it towards me, hoping to knock me to the ground and talk some sense into me, no doubt. But I stop the staff in it's tracks with my telekinesis, and break it into little pieces. I then aim a kick to his broken leg, and he screams in pain and falls over, and I kneel next to him. His teeth are gritted so tightly as he rolls over with a pained gasp and aims a punch for my face. His fist glances off a shield I conjure.
"Trying to think of a strategy, aren't we, Robin?" I ask him in amusement as he closes his eyes and breathes deeply. " But there's no possible way to defeat me. I am so very powerful and…you're just a short skinny powerless little boy with some inane gadgets and useless karate and above average IQ. Nothing you can do against demon lords and monsters. Some superhero."
"That's not gonna work, demon," Robin growls, throwing an ice disk at me. I stop it in midair and blow it up. Chips of ice rain down on us. I let out a loud laugh.
"Hey, Robin. Wanna know a secret? Raven lied. She has seen the other Titans. She saw them all killed. By Trigon. Each and every one. All are dead."
"LIAR!" Robin screams and he actually managed to nail me with a palm strike. My head snaps back, but I bring it back forward with a smart crack. Robin shudders and goes for kick with his good leg, but I catch his foot.
" Oh, I think you know it's true. Starfire was smooshed. Beast Boy was disintegrated. Cyborg was crushed. And the worse part? Starfire died without you ever admitting you loved her. That's all she ever wanted, and you just couldn't do it. Looks like you failed her."
With a piercing scream of rage, Robin tackles me. A blast of dark energy sends him into the air and he lands hard on the ground. Ignoring the undoubtedly crushing pain in his leg, he rolls to the side and somehow gets around me, slamming my back with his elbow. I spin around and slam him on his back with one hand, the other crackling with dark energy. His eyes are wide as saucers as he stares helplessly. "Not true…it's not true…" He knows though. I can tell.
"You. Failed. Her. "
I slam my hand into his forehead and send the image of Starfire being crushed and burned by my father through his brain. He makes an odd croaking noise.
" Just like you failed to save your parents."
The image of them falling from a trapeze flares like a searing flame.
"Just like you failed Batman."
A masked face glares at the younger Robin.
"Just like you failed your team."
Starfire, Cyborg and Beast Boys deaths run back to back in excruciating detail.
" Just like you failed Raven."
My old, weaker self getting zapped and reborn into the me that is now.
" Just like you failed to save the world."
I take my hand away from his forehead. He stares up at me, white as a sheet, motionless, speechless…broken. I have broken him.
"You always fail." I sneer at him.
He nods mutely.
" You want to die, right? You want to die right now. You want me to kill you so you don't have to hurt anymore. "
He nods again, making the odd croaking sound. His face is slick with sweat and tears and blood. Pathetic.
"Well, don't say I never did anything for you. "
I place my hand over his heart and will it to stop beating. It begins to slow, to stall, to quiver under my power. Robin becomes lucid for a second, and begins to choke and cough, desperate for air. "Raven…" he gasps. "Raven…when Raven…gets back…tell her…it's okay. Every…things…gonna…"
He inhales with a choking gasp as I clench my hand harder over his heart.
" Die."
The heart stops beating, and I can feel the life leaving his body. His cold stiff hand falls on mine and his mouth drops open. Everything that was his world is dead, and now so is he. I feel satisfaction as my father grins above…then for some reason…I turn my pale hand over and hold his. It's not really cold, actually. It's still warm. A little…
"Robin…" I whisper and suddenly my soul self is diving back toward me like a bird sighting prey and with a flash of energy, it's inside me once more, I see through my own eyes again and not his and my cloak is blue. But Robin is still dead.
"Robin!" I cry hoarsely, bending over him and hopelessly trying some CPR. I can feel my father getting closer as I thrust my palms into his chest. Closer…and closer…I can't escape him…I can't…I am his…I am his…
You are my daughter and you will do as I say.
I woke up screaming, a scream that seemed to echo all around the room and lash out back at me. It took me a few minutes to realize I was in Titans Tower. It took me a few minutes more to see I was not alone.
"Get…out…of…my…head!" I screamed at the four red eyes staring hauntingly at me from across the room. "Stop making me dream these things! Leave me alone!"
They just continued to stare, and I thought I heard the walls shaking with that damned laughter. It seemed to get louder and louder until it was a pounding in my head I couldn't escape from. I stumbled out of bed, my knees shaky, drenched in sweat and stumbled into the bathroom adjoining my room, switching on the cold nozzle of the shower and jumping in the freezing water, leotard and all. My teeth chattered as I stood under the icy scream, sliding down to a sitting position on the porcelain, my hair quickly becoming like a sodden mop left out in cold water, but I felt much more lucid, much more separated from the dream….dreams…
"Raven?" I heard a knock on my door
Oh for Azar's sake. Fate appeared to be torturing me again.
"Yes, Robin?"
"Um, I heard you screaming. Are you okay?"
"Yeah. Just a nightmare."
"Oh. Um…" Here it comes. "Do you want to talk about it?"
"You know me better than that," I said.
I heard him sigh outside my door. "Well, you know if you have a problem, whatever it is, we'll help you with it."
"Maybe that's the problem," I said softly as Robin's footsteps receded down the hall, as my skin numbed from the icy water and so did my brain, thank Azar, as I pulled myself together once again because that's all I can do…. "Maybe that's the problem after all."
Robin
As I approached the gravestone with my name on it, the stone creature atop it leered at me. I looked blankly back.
"I'm here."
"Hello, Robin. I am…THE GARGOYLE!"
"No, you're not."
"Excuse me?"
"You're not a gargoyle. Gargoyles have water spouts. You're a grotesque."
"Shut your mouth, take off your cape and LAY IT IN YOUR OPEN GRAVE!"
"It's your gig, garg…uh, grotesque." I tossed my cape blithely into the open grave.
"Okay, now take off your tunic," the grotesque said.
"…"
"…"
"Are you seriously telling me to take off my clothes?"
"SHUT UP AND TAKE OFF THE DAMN TUNIC AND LAY IT IN THE GRAVE!"
"Like whatever creep." I tossed my tunic into the grave. Thank God I was wearing a nifty undershirt thing.
"None of that infernal teen slag either! Now, do the mask!"
"Uh uh," I shook my head. "You can make me take off my cape, my tunic, my scaly green underpants and my little pixie boots, but the mask stays. I have a SECRET IDENTITY!"
"You won't need a secret identity where you're going."
"…I'm going to the Caribbean?"
The grotesque-that-thought-it-was-a-gargoyle heaved a huge sigh. "Dude. It's not like it really hides your identity that well anyway."
"I SHALL NEVER TAKE IT OFF!"
"Fine! Then I shall summon your hip young FRIENDS!"
"AHHH NO!"
Wonder Girl, Aqualad, and Kid Flash all appeared in creepy phantom form before me with maniacal grins on their faces.
"Look at Robin! He's a real weak sister," jeered Wonder Girl.
"He puts the nerd in nerdy, like, totally!" Aqualad giggled.
"Yo yo, Robin-O!" KF sneered.
"AGHHHH! DON'T CALL ME ROBIN-O!" I ripped of my mask in desperation. "SECRET IDENTITY BE DAMNED I CAN'T STAND LISTENING TO WALLY TALK!"
"Cool, it worked!" the not-gargoyle said delightedly. "Now your face will decompose and you will be initiated into the DARK SIDE!"
"Aghhhnmph…" I croaked as my skin began to slide away and rot. "Ahh…this is so…uncool…how did I ever get into this mess in the first place?"
"Hey, Bat-meister, I just got a peachy keen invite to oversee the all teenage clubhouse at…some town! The adults were totally bringing them down, man!"
"Teenagers should respect their elders!" my pointy eared guardian pounded his fist into the table. "Like I did my parents! Or would've done if they hadn't, y'know, died."
"You are such a square, Batman and totally don't understand teenagers today! I'm going to take a rain check on saving the world and visit the groovy clubhouse!" I said cheerfully.
"Fine. BE THAT WAY!" Batman called angrily after me as I exited the Batcave.
When I reached the clubhouse I found my pals Wonder Girl, Kid Flash and Aqualad standing over the ruins of a destroyed clubhouse.
"Oh no! Did Wonder Girl go on a rampage again?" I cried.
"No, it appears someone had kidnapped the teenagers from the very clubhouse that we were all invited to!" Aqualad cried.
"Holy convenient kidnapping! We should form a team and solve this uncool crime!" I declared.
"Groovy!" the three of them chorused.
"I can be the brains, KF can be the speed, Wonder Girl can be the strength and Aqualad can be the useless guy who never does anything!"
"Hey!"
"Now we just need a name…" I mused.
"Ooooh! Oooh! I voted Kid Flash and The Flashettes!" Kid Flash waved his hand.
"The Sidekicks who Use Sixties Slang!" Aqualad nodded.
"Teen Titans?" Wonder Girl suggested
"I like Wonder Girl's, and since I have appointed myself leader, that shall be our name. Now let's solve the crime!" I rubbed my hands together in anticipation.
"Wait…if we're gonna be a team we need our parents…um…wait they're all dead…I mean, our guardians permission!" Aqualad pointed out,
"And a lair. No team is complete without a lair," Wonder Girl said.
"And we need to purchase a copyright and cut a record deal!" Kid Flash jumped up and down in excitement.
"Okay, okay, fine. We'll solve the crime AFTER we get all that stuff."
And so it went:
Wonder Woman: BE CAREFUL THEY'RE BOYS AND FULL OF ANGRY TESTOSTERONE, ESPECIALLY KID FLASH, DON'T LET HIM GET WITHIN THREE FEET OF YOU!
Wonder Girl: roll eyes OMG MOM, I'm just as good as any of those leotard toting losers!
Flash: BE CAREFUL AND DONT PANTZ ANYONE!
Kid Flash: Oh, shut up.
Batman: Weeeellll...that's greeeeaat...um be-
Robin: I SHALL ESTABLISH JUSTICE IN THE TOWN WITH THE TEEN MAYOR NAMED TEDDY!
Aquaman: Annnd I'm tallking...lalalala
Aqualad: I have a 'fro
Finally when our permission was established, we built a lair. I'm not exactly sure in what location, or exactly what it was shaped like, but it was definitely a lair. After the record deal, we all settled around the table.
"Okay," I said. "Now we can solve the crime-"
"GUYSGUYSGUYS!" Speedy burst into out lair.
"Hey, this was supposed to be a SECRET lair, man!" I cried in indignation as Speedy bounced around.
"What's the word, buddy-pal?" Kid Flash asked.
"ME AND GREEN ARROW JUST GOT ASKED TO DO THE OPENING TO THE OLYMPICS BECAUSE WE'RE AWESOME!"
"Hey, my ancestors invented the Olympics-"
"NOBODY CARES, WONDER GIRL! But I have a problem. Down at the creek while I was busy shooting up…I mean, uh, getting a drink of water, someone stole my arrows!"
"GASP!" Everyone gasped except for me.
"Uh, Speedy…your arrows are on your back. You used them to shoot the alarm system when you came in."
"Oh," Speedy looked at his holster. "Sorry I get really spacey when I'm high…I MEAN THIRSTY. Who wants to go watch the groovy Olympics with me?"
"WE DO!" Kid Flash, Aqualad and Wonder Girl cried and followed Speedy out the door.
"Hey, cool cats! What about the uncool crime…ah, forget it…." I followed them out.
AND FROM THEN ON THE TEEN TITANS HAD MANY ASTOUNDING ADVENTURES!
THEY BATTLED OVERBEARING FATHERS!
Overbearing Father:…And because of my car accident I decided to live through my son and HE'LL BE AN OLYMPIC RUNNER IF IT KILLS HIM!
Robin: Um. Maybe the reason he ran away is because of the insane amount of pressure you put on him?
Overbearing father: WHAT? lunges at Robin and grabs shirt You know where he is, don't you, you elfin little monster? WHERE IS HE? I want to pressure him some more!
Robin: DAMMIT I GET ENOUGH OF THIS AT HOME!"
Son appears Dad, please don't pressure me anymore.
Father: miraculous change of heart Oh, okay.
…THEY JOINED THE PEACE CORPS!
Aqualad: Leaping mantas, a giant robot in Botswana!
Robin: Holy convient plot device!
Wonder Girl: Merciful Minerva! No wonder they need a Peace Corps…
…THEY FOUGHT THE MAD MOD!
Wonder Girl: I am so in love with this rock star, I'm going to make out with this poster I put on the bulletin board.
Kid Flash: You'd rather make out with a POSTER than me?
President of US: Guys, I think the rock star Wonder Girl is making out with is a drug smuggler. Follow him.
Wonder Girl: Cool, I'll get to make out with the real rock star!
Robin: I don't like this guy…
Rock Star: plays a prank on Aqualad
Robin:…but now I do!
Aqualad: I have no sense of humor…
Kid Flash: Okay, so it's not really the rock star smuggling the clothes, this English cat named Mad Mod is using his clothes to smuggle stuff.
Mad Mod: knocks Kid Flash out and dumps him in lake
Aqualad: Groovy, I'm not useless! dives in and rescues Kid Flash Now I will hang him by this hook all precariously and hope he doesn't fall off and drown! Now I'll capture-
Mad Mod: punches out Aqualad Bwahahahaha, my duckies!
Aqualad:…I really am useless.
Teen Titans: capture Mad Mod after a lot of procrastinating
Rock Star: How un-round! I have no sizzlin' threads!
Robin: Borrow mine, cat! stands in barrel
Wonder Girl: Groovy, now I can drool over his legs!
…MEET BEAST BOY!
Beast Boy: My parents are dead and now the Doom Patrol won't accept me even though I keep proving myself by repeatedly attacking them!
flashback
BB: Ah, Rita's pretty much the only person in the Doom Patrol who's nice to me, but I need to PROVE MYSELF! I will turn into a mouse and scare her.
Elasti-girl: AHH! A mouse, I will stomp it into a submission! Oh wait, it's green. AHH! Beast Boy! I will stomp him into submission!
BB: AHH HIGH HEELS! runs away
BB:…so can I join the Teen Titans?
Robin: You need parent or guardians permission.
BB: I DON'T HAVE A PARENT OR GAURDIAN JUST A CRAZY GUY WHO WANTS MY MONEY!
Robin:…sorry.
BB: FREAKIN' LIAR, I HATE YOU!
Kid Flash: Holy Hannah, what a problem child!
Robin: Why do I have the feeling I'm going to see him again?…and again?…and again?
BB: The circus will accept me!
Circus guy: The circus will hypnotize you into doing evil!
BB: Darn!
Robin: Beast Boy's on a rampage at the circus! Good thing we're all trained acrobats.
Wonder Girl: No, that's just you…
Robin: Oh, right.
Teen Titans save day
Wonder Girl: When you were attacking us, Beast Boy, I thought for a second, "maybe we should have let him join…" so, let's totally break the fourth wall and ask the readers if you should join.
Readers: NO!
BB: NOBODY ACCEPTS ME, WHY?
Robin: Maybe it's because you're too depressed, man. You should be a hip swinger like me! Right, guys?
Titans: …
Robin: Maybe if you were…funny of something…
BB: THAT'S IT! I'm GOING TO DEVELOP A SENSE OF HUMOR IF IT KILLS ME!
Robin:…um, don't go overboard with that…Beast Boy…hello?
…DEFEAT DING DONG DADDY!
DDD: Ding Dong Daddy is the hippest, hoppest, grooviest, way out cat in the entire area man.
Titans: This is too much, even for us.
Robin: KF, see if this guy is doing criminal stuff. Discreetly.
KF: I SHALL VIBRATE MY MOLECULES THROUGH THE SOLID WALL AND HEY CRIMINALS!
DDD: Ding Dong Daddy heard that! Grease Monkeys, attack!
Robin: …and by discreetly, I mean, don't announce it out loud.
KF: …oh…
AND PRETEND TO BE HIPPIES!
Wonder Girl: Hippies are groovy. Kid Flash, you should grow a beard.
KF: …I'm only fourteen…
Police Officer: I hate hippies! Titans, follow them and see if they're committing any crime.
Hippies: HIDE THE POT!
Titans pretend to be hippies
Real crime comes along
Robin: Guys, I totally dig your non-violent approach to stuff but…punches guy Oh, what the heck I just like hitting people!
UNTIL FINALLY:
"All right, our record deal came through!" Kid Flash said excitedly in the bowels of Titans Lair. "I shall be lead singer and we will be hip!"
"WOULD YOU GUYS SHUT UP I'M TRYING TO FIGURE OUT MY ORIGIN!" Wonder Girl screamed from the couch.
"Y'know, I'm the totally ginchy and gear leader, I should be lead singer…" I began to note, but suddenly a giant stone creature appeared in the middle of the tower.
"ONE OF YOU BRATS WRONGLY SENT ME TO JAIL AND NOW YOU WILL PAY!"
"Whoa!" said Kid Flash. "Which of us would ever be unethical and un-gear enough to send someone to jail wrongly?"
"Uh…Robin?" Wonder Girl mused.
"Yeah, Robin," said Aqualad.
"You're probably right," agreed Kid Flash.
"Oh, great faith you have in me, guys!" I spouted off.
"Ah ha! Their minds are overtaken by suspicion! Now they are mine! Zombies, attack!" the villain cackled.
And just like that, Wonder Girl, Kid Flash and Aqualad were glowy eyed zombies prepared to attack.
"Aw, crap," I said, and I slid down the laundry chute. "Good thing my OCD means I hate dirty laundry and I installed this thing even though we don't actually live here!"
I landed on the pond the laundry chute mysteriously led to. Well, my friends were as good as dead. Hmmm…sad. Well, no use crying about it. Time to fight crime!
Eventually of course, I discovered as I punched bad guys across a giant newspaper, is it's really hard to fight villains without my slang slinging superfriends for back up. So there was only one thing to do…GIVE UP! So I went up to see the villain who had taken my friends, the grotesque-that-thought-he-was-a-gargoyle and…
Oh. That's how I got into this mess.
I opened my eyes to find Aqualad staring at me.
"Groovy! Robin-o's wised up and decided to join us!"
I sighed and kicked Aqualad in the face. "Completely useless…"
"Hey, Boy Wonder, why the halibut did you K-O Aqualad?" Kid Flash marveled.
"Because…you are UN-ROUND!" I said dramatically to my scarlet friend.
Kid Flash gasped loudly. "How dare you! I'm going to run at you aimlessly for that!"
"Ah, you may be good at running aimlessly, Kid Flash," I said as he ran toward me. "But you were never very good at anticipating a…JUDO FLIP!" I effortlessly judo flipped him away by making a vague wiggling motion with my hands.
"You may have judo-flipped Kid Flash, but you know I haven't got any weaknesses!" snarled Wonder Girl.
"I do. I don't hit girls."
"…That is the most retarded weakness ever," Wonder Girl said.
"Yeah, I know."
"Oh MY GOD! " The grotesque suddenly appeared out of nowhere. "Robin! How could you betray me!"
"…It wasn't really that hard."
"Gargoyle! I am your servant! You are my master! I am your good little girl! You are my sugardaddy!" Wonder Girl said solemnly. "I-
"JUDO FLIP!" I attacked Wonder Girl from behind. "Ha ha Miss Ponytail! Huh. Guess I do hit girls…."
"UHN!" Wonder Girl threw me over her head and I crash landed in front of the not Gargoyle. "Hello? Power of the Greek Gods? He's all yours, Gargoyle."
"Ha! Robin, I will demolish you!" The Gargoyle cackled. "There is no way you can defeat me! NO WAY!"
I heaved another great sigh and kicked him in the face.
"OW! Hey, that hurt! Wait, where are you going?"
"Through that mysterious and convenient vortex," I said, grabbing my team mates. "Let's go!"
"NOOOOO!" The Grotesque Gargoyle cried. "WHY ARE YOU SO SMARRRRRT?"
"DUNUHNUHNUHNUH BATMAN!" I cried as I leaped through the vortex and my team and I were promptly dumped into the graveyard.
"Uh, wow," said Kid Flash. "Why are we surrounded by gravestones with our names on them? I don't dig it."
"Pun!" Aqualad laughed.
"Robin! I've never seen you without your mask! What happened?" Wonder Girl asked.
"We were kidnapped by a grotesque with no discernable motivation. Now if you excuse me, I believe this is my first angsty story where I'm all alone and my friends have turned against me because I have trust issues. I'm going to go celebrate."
As I walked away, I heard Kid Flash say "He said three sentences without using any outdated slang. THAT IS SO , LIKE, WRONG, SWINGER."
My eyes snapped open and it took me a while to figure out that I was not in Titans "lair" but Titans Tower. I was in the evidence room as well, it seemed. I must have fallen asleep here again. That had to be my weirdest dream ever. My brain couldn't have possibly manufactured that. I decided that it was Beast Boy's fault, somehow, which made me feel better as I began to concoct an elaborate theory as to how…. until I remembered how scary Beast Boy had looked in my dream and the way he had turned into animal that were normal color EXCEPT THEY HAD HIS FACE ON THEM.
Must…find…someone….else…to…blame.
I realized I had been researching parallel universes when I'd fallen asleep. Only why would I be researching that? This was too weird.
I decided this was all Batman's doing somehow. He's pretty much to blame for my anti social tendencies, so why not this too? Batman is such a square AHH NO. MUST NOT TALK LIKE THAT.
Raven…Raven…this was her fault. She can do stuff like mess with your computers and plant dreams in your head, I know she can. SHE IS JUST THAT GOOD. Well, fine, Raven, play your little games. You're going to be the death of me someday, I-
"ARRRRGGGGGHHHHH!"
Huh. That was Raven. Obviously feeling guilty about her ELABORATE PLOT-
Oh, snap out of it Robin and go see what's wrong.
Starfire
"Blackfire?"
"Hmmm?"
"Why do people do bad things?"
"'Cuz it's fun."
"That is not a very good reason," I drew my knees to my chest as my sister drank from her wooden mug blithely. We were in a serene place by a twisted tree and a sparkling beautiful pond. I did not think we were on Earth or Tamaran. Somewhere in between…
"Since when am I supposed to justify the entire world to you? X'hal, Starfire! Look, you wanna know the truth? Nobody's moral code is as strict as they pretend it to be. It's all about beliefs. And wills. We're selfish creatures, understand? Ultimately, there's always a selfish reason behind any action."
"But-?"
"You and your Titan stuff?"
"Yes."
"You know why you joined. You joined because they were the first people to accept you. Your friends. They give you the family you want, the warmth…they're probably the only people who would put up with your naïveté…and of course you have a crush on that spiky haired little leader. You're saving people not because you wanna better humanity, but because that's what your friends do."
"That is not true!"
"Sure."
"And the others-
"I can see I have to spell it out for you. Your boyfriend, Sparrow…."
"Robin."
"Whatever. His parents, dead right?"
"I surmise as much."
"Guilt. Neurotic sense of guilt. Couldn't save them, must save world. He does this so HE can feel better. And because of his mentor. He left, right? Bet he had some rift with Batguy… now he's desperate to prove himself."
"He wants to help."
"Get real, Kory. Why else would he get so obsessed? He's always pushing, punishing himself…he has something to prove."
"Maybe. I do not believe so….but….you forget the others."
"Okay, who next? Beast Boy? His parent are dead too, right?"
"Yes."
"Same thing as Robin. Guilt. Not to mention, guess who were the first people to take him in? His old team, the Doom whatever. Then you guys. He does this because this is all he knows."
"Cyborg."
"Around all of you he feels normal. It distracts him from his "problem." Gives him a life and a family. Once again, you accepted him, no one else did."
"Raven."
"We don't know anything about her. But judging from those evil freakouts, I'd say guilt. She had a secret. She's got something to make up for. And of course, as soon as she came from Azarath, who were the first people to treat her kindly? Three guesses."
"Us. So you are saying…"
"None of you are in this for pure noble reasons. Deep down, you are selfish. Any of you could have gone either way. What would it have taken? Someone else besides Batman finding Sparrow-
"Robin."
"-Whatever, after his parents bit it? Cyborg being mocked a few too many times with nobody to help him? Raven giving in? Beast Kid-
"Boy."
"-Whatever, getting inducted into a team of supervillians? And you, if, say, Slade had helped you with the Gordanians, where would you be?"
"…"
"It's luck. An off beat, a bad timing, that's all it takes to cross the line. You're not any different. Just lucky. So…what gives you the right, sister? What gives you the right to judge us?"
"You are wrong."
I had turned away from her, now I turned back. My sister was smiling lazily, as if she was above me and my insistence she was speaking out wrongly.
"There…is always a choice. It is not just luck. It is like my beloved friend, Terra. She had all the luck that is bad. But she made the right choice in the end."
"Whatever you say," Blackfire snickered, dipping her mug into the cool, clean pond. "Hey, Koriand'r, could you look at something in the pond for me?"
"Stop calling me that," I leaned forward to peer in the pond "My name is Star-
I broke off in a gasp as I saw in my reflection in the water, instead of myself, mirrored there was Blackfire.
I did not even notice as she reached over and pushed me into the water.
My eyes fluttered open and I tried to sit up, but instead I slid out of my bed, crashing into the pink carpeted floor with all due force.
"Gremplork!" I rolled over, rubbing my head. I had been dreaming about something. I believe to do with Blackfire. How odd. The imaged slipped away to the depth of my brain like tiny fish wriggling out of a…was it net?…And into the water. Water. At the end of the dream I believe I had looked into the water and saw Blackfire staring back at me. I went over and rooted through my drawer until I came up with a small book titled "Tamaranian Guide to Dreams" (the title being in Tamaranian of course).
I flipped through it until I found the section on siblings.
"If you dream about switching bodies with a sibling," I read carefully "That means you are not eating enough Glorg. Of course!" I snapped the book closed. "I shall prepare a glorious Glorg breakfast for all my friends in the morning! Thank you indeed, Tamaranian wisdom! Now I will be able to get some rest."
And with that, I went back to my bed, placing my feet firmly on the fluffy cushion and my head over the edge of the bed and dreamed of no more confusing things.
Cyborg
"Dad. So tired of the science fair. Can we go now? I have football practice." I trudged beside my Dad, staring down at my sneakers. Having sneakers seemed odd to me somehow, but I could hardly be bothered to figure out why.
"Now, Victor, is that fair? I take you to the science fair and you complain that it's not fair and you aren't faring well when I paid quite a fare to get in here; now that's unfair."
"O…kay," I said.
"Hey man."
I turned around. Ron Evers, my best friend, was standing behind me, leaning against a display case and flicking his lighter on and off.
"Let's blow this joint," he said.
"But I think my dad's finally gone crazy. Can't leave him alone."
"He was always crazy though, wasn't he?"
"Yeah, I guess. Okay, let's go." I turned around and left my dad standing there mumbling about ferries.
"So, what are we doing?" I asked as we exited the building.
"The white man's bringing us down. So we're gonna bring him down."
"And how exactly?"
"Blowing up the Statue of Liberty," Ron said evenly.
"…Okay, yeah, that was a total non sequitor."
"I have no idea what that means."
"How is blowing up the Statue of Liberty going to show the white man?"
"Dude. It just WILL."
"VICTOR STONE!" My mother stomped out of her house and grabbed me by the ear. "I told you not to hang around with that boy! I should smack you!"
"See, Vic?" Ron called as Mom dragged me away. "White man bringing you down!"
"MY MOTHER IS NOT A WHITE MAN, YOU LOSER!"
"Yeah, you better believe it," Mom pushed me into the house. "Just wait till your father gets-oh, hi dear."
Dad was standing in the front hall with a remote in his hand.
"Victor, I am very disappointed in you, which is why I've wired this entire house to explode."
"Wait, what?"
My dad pushed the button on the remote and I was met with a blinding flash and a scream like a thousand worlds dying. When I awoke, I was lying in rubble, my father standing above me.
"Dad? Where's Ma?"
"You don't want to know that."
"What do you mean? And…and…wh-why can't I move?" I strained uselessly and looked around. "Oh my God! What happened to my legs?"
"Life isn't fair, is it, Victor?" said Dad calmly, dropping a science fair flier on me.
It was near dawn when I woke up. I still didn't understand how I could have dreams. You'd think being in "shut down" mode would have some benefits, like sleeping in peace. Why couldn't I escape from him, even in my sleep? It wasn't…wasn't…wasn't…
Wasn't fair.
I got up with a grunt. Screw this. I'm going to go make waffles.
Then I smelled the Glorg.
Beast Boy
"I love you, Angel-Pie," I sang, skipping along.
"I love you, honey bunch," Terra sang back at me as our feet pounded the pavement in synchronization, our hands entertwined. "And I won't ever ever leave you."
"Really?"
"No. I'm betraying you to Slade in ten minutes."
"Dammit, Terra, you're gonna turn me emo!"
"Walk with me, talk with me, sing Spice Girls songs with me and yes I know you like them, I know all your seeeecrreeetss…" she snag spinning me around in circles.
"Please don't tell anyone. It would ruin my macho image."
"Which wouldn't be hard, considering you don't have one."
"Have you been hanging around Raven too much or something? Cuz that was cold."
"Sand dunes!" Terra gestured in excitement towards some dunes that had just randomly appeared.
"Why are sand dunes so awesome alla the sudden?" I asked as Terra ran towards them like they were her salvation. When she reached them she turned around and smiled at me.
"Bye."
She sank into the ground, and before I could even react I was gone and in a room with a monkey.
"Hello," said the monkey. "I'm smarter than you."
"Why are you talking?" I asked.
"Why are you?"
"I'm a person. I'm supposed to talk."
"No. You are a monkey."
"Is this an evolution thing?"
"You can turn into a monkey, dingus."
"Yeah, but I can't talk when I'm a monkey."
"Yes you can."
"No…I can't."
"You can. You just don't want to."
"What? You're crazy?"
"You could talk that time when you were an amoeba, couldn't you? Amobeas can't talk, Beast Boy," the monkey said intelligently.
"Neither can monkeys," I pointed out.
"Stop missing the point."
"So you're saying, if I wanted to, I could talk in animal form, I just don't want to? That is crazy. Why would I not want to talk in animal form?"
"I'm only going to spend one second of my time thinking about that question, because your little insecure mind bores me. Okay, done. You can't talk in animal form because you are in the state of mind of the animal when you transform, and your will is not strong enough to transcend that. I assume you could talk as amoeba because it has no state of mind, much like yourself."
"Hey! How do you know all this?"
"I'm smarter than you. But then again, everyone is."
Suddenly, I was staring at Mento, dressed up as like Dr. Phil. And Slade.
"Slade?" I said. "Steve?"
"Garfield, we are here to talk about your issues with Slade," Mento said. "And transcend them."
"Dude. Wouldn't Robin be better suited for this?"
"Oh snap, you're right. Well, how about your issues with me?" Mento smiled.
"You're an obsessive martyr who pushes to hard," I said.
"Cool. Will you be my apprentice?" Slade asked.
"No, I am good, you half blind…person," Mento said stoically.
"Be my apprentice or I will kill young Garfield," Slade threatened
"Eh, go ahead," Mento shrugged.
"Wait, wh-"
BAM.
First thing I realized when I opened my eyes and jumped out of the bed in a frenzy was I was not dead. Which is good. Second thing I realized was I was on Titans Tower and not on Dr. Phil with Slade. Which was also good. Third thing I realized was I smelled something like a stink bomb would if you cooked it. Which is not good
"Oh MAN," I opened the door and peaked out to find Cyborg standing mutely in the hall. "Don't tell me Star's cookin' Glorg."
"Yeah. I'd stay in there if I were you."
"I kind of wish I was still dreaming now," I sighed. Here goes another day.
A/N: Robin's dream is a parody of the sixties Teen Titans. Obviously. Most of the dialogue and all of the situations pulled from "Showcase: Teen Titans". Thanks to all my reviewers!