(Authors intro) "The new Agarthan technology is finally ready and Joffrey is marveled by his new found powers. However not fully understanding the technology Joffrey is soon scammed."
Special congratulations to the Amazon gift card winner. "TheSilveryShadow!"
Everyone stood in the Great Hall. Joffrey sat on his throne and watched as Grand Maester Pycelle connected the final few wires. It had been months since Joffrey had gotten the Agarthan technology. Since that time the Maesters and royal builders had been working tirelessly to complete this project, and now the final pieces were being put into place. Joffrey looked at the new light bulbs coming out of lion head light sockets that covered the walls. Giant red and gold chandeliers covered the ceiling. Golden crowns held there candle light bulbs in place.
"Your Grace." Pycelle said. "I am pleased to announce that the Agarthan light sources have been assembled and are ready to be turned on for the first time."
"Well done Grand Maester." Joffrey said. "You may turn them on."
"Your Grace for a monumental occasion like this you should be the first one to turn on the kingdoms new lights." Joffrey jumped off his throne. Eager to try his new technology. Cersei smiled widely. Proud of her son's accomplishments.
"See little brother Joffrey is a good king. He has brought us this new technology and soon he will defeat his enemies."
"It has not worked yet, and in these types of situations things always seem to go wrong." Tyrion replied. Joffrey royally walked up to the light switch.
"How does it work?" Joffrey asked.
"Simply flip the switch Your Grace." Pycelle answered in an excited voice. Joffrey placed his hand on the light switch and said.
"Good people, members of the Kings Guard, and Small Council today a new era begins!" Joffrey flipped the switch and within seconds' electricity started coursing through his body. Joffrey screamed as the lights around the Great Hall started to explode one by one. Pycelle tried to pull Joffrey away but started to get electrocuted himself.
"Help the King!" Sir Meryn screamed. Everyone was in a panic trying to avoid the flying shards of glass. A few seconds before the Kings Guard got to Joffrey the light switch exploded and sent Joffrey and Pycelle flying into Sir Meryn. The Great Hall was filled with smoke and broken glass. A slightly scorched Joffrey covered in black ash slowly got up. He felt his hair which was standing straight up. Everyone else had minor cuts from the shattered glass.
"This is a catastrophe! I've lost control of my bodily functions!" Pycelle screamed. Joffrey clinched his fists and began to shack with rage. He looked around the Throne room which was filled with smoke and broken glass.
"I'll have your head!" Joffrey screamed. "You told me this technology was supposed to light up the room! You placed a weapon in the Throne room!" Joffrey screamed.
"Idiot!" Cersei screamed. "How dare you put my son at risk!"
"I'm sorry." Pycelle said in a nervous voice. "I will find out what went wrong and correct it right away."
"You will do no such thing." Cersei replied and ordered Qyburn to figure out what went wrong despite Pycelle's protesting.
It took a few days to clean the throne room and for Qyburn to rewire and repair all the lights. During that time the Stark's had sent a raven wanting to meet with the Lannisters to possibly discuses peace terms for certain parts of the country. Joffrey and the others stood outside the Throne room, while Sansa stood by the light switch.
"Ok Sansa turn the switch." Joffrey yelled from behind one of throne rooms large wooden doors. The Kings Guard held the doors. Ready to close them at a moment's notice. Sansa flipped the switch and the entire throne room lit up. Joffrey quickly ran in and was amazed by the lights.
"Well Struck Qyburn. Now we can create light without candles."
"The lights are powered by a device called a generator which is powered by compressed livestock manure." Qyburn replied. Joffrey did not know what that meant, but he was glad to have it. Qyburn handed Joffrey a small device.
"This is called a phone it allows you to talk to people over great distances." Qyburn told Joffrey to dial the number under Tywin's name. Joffrey did and put the phone up to his ear.
"Your Grace." Tywin said. Joffrey was amazed to hear his Grandfathers voice.
"Grandfather we now have Agarthan technology!" Joffrey said pleased with himself.
"Yes." Tywin replied. "Congratulations on gaining these new technologies. You have done something to help house Lannister for a change."
"Thank you Grandfather." Joffrey replied. After that Joffrey hung up and turned to Sansa who was worried about Joffrey's new toys.
"This is why we will win the war." Joffrey said happily. Currently only the throne room had lights, but Qyburn was working hard to install lights in the rest of Kings Landing.
It was early the next morning Joffrey was woken up by the phone ringing. At first he wondered what the loud ringing was, but as he woke up he remembered. Joffrey sat up in bed and picked up the phone.
"Hello this is King Joffrey."
"Hello." A voice with a very heavy foreign accent answered back. "I am Officer John Smith with the Agarthan Internal Taxing Service."
"What?" Joffrey answered wondering who was called him or how they got his number.
"Listen to me very carefully." John Smith said in a serious voice. "An injection has been filed against you for tax evasion." Joffrey became enraged.
"The people pay taxes to the king! The king does not pay taxes!"
"Do not interrupted me again." John Smith replied. "You must pay the amount of $7000 dollars for the injection to be removed."
"I am the King of Westeros!" Joffrey screamed. "I do not pay taxes." John Smith was silent for a moment. Joffrey could hear papers being moved around.
"You recently got Agarthan technology is that correct?" He asked.
"Yes." Joffrey yelled.
"That is what you need to pay the taxes of $7000 dollars on."
"Lord Winston never said anything about this!" Joffrey screamed back.
"Yes he did." John Smith replied. "I have just ordered bombers to attack your city. The only way to stop them is to pay the amount of $7000 dollars." Joffrey screamed in terror. Made a few more threats, but even he knew he could not stop the attack. So he finally agreed to pay the money.
"Ok. You need to come to Agartha right away and stay on the phone with me at all times." John Smith said.
"It will take me hours to get there!" Joffrey screamed. John Smith informed Joffrey that the bombers would be held off as long as Joffrey was trying to get to Agartha. Not wanting to be bombed Joffrey placed the phone in his pocket and leaped out of bed. He ordered The Kings royal carriage and the King's private plane to be readied at once. Joffrey ran though the Red Keep still in his grape pajamas. He quickly turned a corner and nearly slammed into Sansa.
"Why are you in such a hurry?" She asked.
"Out of my way! We are being bombed! The king must leave at once to stop it!" Joffrey replied in a panic.
"You can't leave." She stated. "You have that meeting with my family today." Joffrey frozen in his tracks.
"The king cannot make the meeting!" He quickly said. Then he realized he needed to be there or send a representative in his place. Joffrey's mind was in a panic. By his own law if the king sent someone in his place he needed to select them in person and in front of people. However he had not time. Joffrey looked at Sansa a pained angered looked formed on his face. As if he was about to say something difficult.
"I have no choice!" He screamed as he ordered a piece of paper and a quill to be brought to him. "Sansa Stark you will represent the King at this meeting!" The Royal workers and maids in the area looked at him shocked. Sansa looked at him equally shocked.
"You want me to represent you at a meeting with my family?" Sansa asked in an unbelieving voice. Joffrey shook with rage.
"The King has no choice. We are getting bombed from the sky!" Joffrey screamed in a crazed voice. Joffrey quickly wrote down Sansa is to represent the king today. She cannot set herself free or do anything to harm the kingdom. After that he ordered a stunned Sansa to give that to the members of the Small Council. After that he ran out of site.
Sansa slowly walked to the Small Council chamber still not believing this was happening. Everyone who just witnessed Joffrey's actions followed.
"What do you want?" Sir Meryn asked. "You know you're not allowed anywhere near hear." For the first time he noticed the small crowned behind Sansa. "Why are all these people with you?"
"You won't believe me if I tell you." Sansa said as she handed Sir Meryn Joffrey's letter. As Sir Meryn started reading the letter his eyes grew wide with shock.
"Lies." He said. "You have forged the King's hand writing."
"No." Sansa said all these people saw it. Everyone in the crowd started saying shaking their heads and claimed it was true. Sir Meryn tried to speak, but no words would come out of this mouth. He slowly walked into the Small Council chamber.
"What has she done now?" Cersei asked the moment she noticed Sansa. Sir Meryn tried to speak but all he got out was a few mumbles as he handed Cersei the note. Cersei read it for a moment and listen to the witness.
"Nothing but lies and a forgery." Cersei said confidently Joffrey will settle this matter when he gets here. Cersei was about to tear the note up when Tyrion grabbed it. Cersei ordered the King's Guards to go find Joffrey.
"This is Joffrey's hand writing." Tyrion said. "Sansa why did he write this?"
"All please!" Cersei cut in. "I cannot believe your actually falling for this."
"I have no idea." Sansa answered. "He was in a complete panic claiming he needed to get to Agartha in order to stop the kingdom from getting bombed, then he ran off. All this occurred while he was still in this pajamas." Sansa said with a laugh which caused Cersei to glare at her.
"I can assure everyone the Agarthans have no intention of bombing us." Petyr Baelish and Varys both added. Sir Meryn ran back into the room.
"The King is not in the Red Keep! Everyone I questioned said they saw him running around in a panic. The stable master claims Joffrey left in his carriage wearing his pajamas a few minutes ago!" Cersei's confident look quickly turned to a look of concern. She picked up the Small Council chamber phone and called Joffrey.
"I'm getting nothing but a beeping noise!" She screamed.
"That means His Grace is using the phone." Grand Maester Pycelle said. He started to explain the details of it before Cersei told him to shut up.
"Well that settles it. Sansa is telling the truth." Bronn said looking out the window. "Joffrey's plane just took off."
"So that makes Sansa the King's representative until Joffrey returns." Tyrion said in a somewhat surprised voice. He was curious to see how this situation would play out. The Small Council spent the next several hours arguing over how this was possible, why Joffrey would do it, and if they should honor it. Finally it was decided to go alone with Joffrey's wishes.
Six hours later Joffrey's plane landed at the royal Agarthan airport. Joffrey stormed out of the plane. Crowds stared at him because he was in his pajamas, but he paid no attention to them as he ran through the airport.
"Ok the king has made it to the Agarthan airport."
"Good go to the airport gift shop." John Smith said. Joffrey ran around the airport for a few minutes until he found the gift shop.
"The king is at the gift shop what now?" Joffrey demanded to know. The second this situation was over he was going back to Kings Landing to plan an attack for this trickery and humiliation.
"Now that you are at the airport gift shop find the gift card section and look for the gift cards with an apple and a music note." After demanding to know where the gift cards were Joffrey ran over and saw the gift cards John Smith had described.
"The king has found the gift cards!" Joffrey yelled. "Now stop the bombs!"
"That will be done once the final step is completed. The final step is to read me the activation codes off each of the $500 dollar gift cards." Joffrey read each letter in an annoyed loud voice. An hour and fourteen gift cards later Joffrey was finally finished.
"Ok King Joffrey the payments have been received and the injection has been canceled." After saying that John Smith hung up.
"I'll have your head!" Joffrey screamed. He was outrage he started kicking and throwing things until he remembered he had left Sansa as the Kings representative. Joffrey stood in shock for a few seconds not believing he gave such an order. Joffrey ran for his plane. Joffrey rushed outside the gift shop and was taken down by airport secretly.
"You are under arrest for gift card theft and destroying an Agarthan gift shop!" The arresting officer said. Joffrey screamed as he was taken to the prosecuting room.