"Love, yeogie!" [Love, over here!] I hear a familiar loud voice in the crowd. Mina is waving at me from the VIP area and I wave back, winking with my heavy fake lashes. She stands beside Jenny, who I almost didn't recognize without her glasses on, and a few other people from my department. The dance floor is jam-packed with people moving rhythmically to the blaring sounds of the house beats I'm playing.

"Yo, Jun!" I call out to my favorite bouncer. The tall, dark-skinned man comes up to my booth to lend an ear. "Do you see those people at the VIP area? They're my friends, can you ask Ben to serve them a bottle of vodka under my tab?" I point to their table and he gives me an okay sign, his arm muscles flexing as he does. He saunters towards Ben and I watch the young bartender excitedly scan the VIP area to find my friends. They're obviously not the friends he expected. He snaps at me from the bar with such visible disappointment and points to the table.

"Where's Jackson?" He mouths. I shrug in response, hoping that Ben would forgive me if Jackson didn't come as promised. Last I heard, GOT7 is on a plane from Japan after their first concert in Tokyo so he must have been too tired to get up and party. Ben shakes his head at me while setting up the shot glasses and a bottle of Absolut on a tray. The bartender is attractive as heck with his lean body and pomade-fixed, jet black hair, but he's also as gay as can be. He once told me he only has eyes for Jackson ever since the group debuted so when I gave him the news that my celebrity friend promised to come, Ben took extra measures to look as dashing as possible. His white shirt is unbuttoned way lower than usual to show off his collarbones and pecs, his black pants tighter than ever, his hair extra neat.

Just as I'm blowing Ben a kiss to combat his nasty reaction, we hear gasps and whispers from the people near the entrance. The crowd starts to part as two men wearing black snapbacks swagger towards the VIP area. I decide to steal everyone's attention by transitioning to a remix of a Monsta X's All In. It elicits a collective sound of approval from the crowd, and earns me a thumbs up from the new addition to Jenny and Mina's table.

"This one's for all the Monbebes in the crowd," I say through the microphone, flaunting my Aussie accent. "Shout out to my friends back there with Jackson and Jooheon! Let's go!" I pump up the volume for the fresh wave of dancing crowd in front of my booth. Everyone—even the feisty-looking men on either side of Jackson and Jooheon—dances and bobs appreciatively to the music.

There's a sense of calm that washes through me as the party scene gets wilder, and it allows me to focus on prepping the next half of my set with my headphones on. I don't know why this energy seems to be enveloping me in a bubble. I'm a huge fan of silence, but the feeling of being in a huge crowd and yet being alone with your work all at the same time is so surprisingly addictive. From afar I can see Jackson watching me with a look of awe on his face. It's the first time he's seeing me in the spotlight, surrounded by people and in full clubbing attire. I remember the look on his face the last time we saw each other. I was in such a hurried, anxious, disheveled state and I felt like I reeked of sex but if he did notice he barely made it known.

I finish my set with a GOT7 and Monsta X mash up which prompts Jackson and Jooheon to do a mini dance off in the middle of the crowd, much to everyone's delight. They both cheer for me as I wrap my set up. "Oh my god, that was crazy!" Jackson says, taking my hand as I climb down the stairs by the side of the stage.

"Thank you! Wow, I didn't think you'd really come!"

"I told you I'll see you right?" He says, smiling proudly. I can't help but smile back gratefully.

"Annyeong haseyo!" [Hello!] Jooheon says with a curt bow from behind Jackson.

"Oh, Annyeong haseyo! DJ Love imnida, bangapsumnida!" [Oh, hello! I'm DJ Love, nice to meet you!] I answer, nodding despite feeling anxious of Jackson's hand on my lower back.

"It's amazing how you played our latest songs tonight! Kamsahamnida, Noona! [Thank you, Noona!]" He whisper shouts amidst the booming sounds as we walk away from the stage.

"Aigoo, Jooheonie, please feel free to talk casually with me. Jackson just calls me Love." I pat his back and wink at him, making his dimple pop as he smiles at me. Aw, cute! They lead me to their table, praising me along the way.

Mina is absolutely wasted by the time I get there. Jenny and the rest of the people in my department promise to take her home safely and I thank them for dropping by and cheering for me. As they take their leave, Jooheon introduces me to his manager he calls Min Suk. The man also brought another friend with him, a tall guy with a kind-looking face.

"Oh, you look familiar. Have we met before?" I ask respectfully in Korean.

"Ne, [Yes,] I'm glad you remember. I'm one of Bangtan's managers from Big Hit. We met at the elevator." The man introduces himself as Lee Jonghan.

"Ah, majayo! [Ah, that's right!] We met at Lotte Hotel." I smile warmly at him as I shake his hand. We all drink our beers while discussing my collaboration with Amber. Both Jonghan and Jooheon express their interest in working with me for BTS and Monsta X. I happily agree, reminding myself for the nth time to call Namjoon in the morning. A few more minutes pass before I decide to take Jackson by the hand to introduce him to Ben at the bar.

They happily talk in English, with Jackson blabbering about his Americanized upbringing while Ben nods along, a look of utter fascination crossing his face. I excuse myself and head to the employee lounge upstairs so I can finally change out of my sweaty clothes.

I love working at Callabooze. Aside from the strange energy I get when I'm spinning here on weekends, I love everything it stands for as a company. Almost all of the staff here are expats and halfsies. People who love living in South Korea so much they decided to call it second home, and people who live here but never felt like they belonged. There's Ben who's 100% American yet his heart belongs to K-Dramas and K-Pop. Jun, who's born and raised in Daegu but whose father was an African-American soldier. The manager is a Filipino ex-seaman. The other bartender is Indian, and the other bouncer is British. The owner, a South Korean we call Boss Min Hoo, says he likes being around foreigners like us because we give him a different perspective in life. When we first met he was so surprised that I had dual citizenship because I was born here, but he insisted I talk to him with my Australian accent because it helps him practice—with what, I'm not sure. All I know is that since working here, I've managed to enjoy myself, meet people, and fatten my bank account.

I make my way back to the floor in a cropped hoodie and sweatpants combo, my bag hanging from my shoulders. Ben is obviously on cloud nine, judging from the fucked out look he's sporting. "So how was it?" I ask, watching him dry off a glass mindlessly.

"He can't be real. He's so fucking charming!" He complains loudly over the music, making me laugh and glance at Jackson who's back with Jooheon, Min Suk, and Jonghan at the table. I blink, surprised to see that he's been staring at me from where he stands. He's smiling, but there's a look in his eyes thats so off-putting. It's the same look he gave me when we parted at the basement elevators. "Do me a favor and drag his hot ass out of here?" Ben says, interrupting my thoughts. "I'm afraid I won't be able to restrain myself if he orders another fucking drink from me."

I laugh at the young man's boldness. I don't think I can ever be that straightforward with Mark—At least not when we're out and about. "Araso, [I understand,] I'll see you next week, okay?" I blow him a kiss before heading to back to the table where my friend stays, his eyes still glued on me.

"Guys, sorry to cut this short but I'm really tired so I'll go ahead, okay? Thank you so much for," I bow slightly to each of them, before shaking their hands. Jonghan seems to be really pleased to meet me outside of work. He lingers on the final hand shake and even leans forward for an awkward hug. Jackson drinks the rest of his beer and takes my bag, slinging it on his broad shoulder.

"I'll take her home. See you some other time, bro." He hugs his buddy Jooheon one last time, waves to the managers, takes my hand and pulls me away.

I hear a few whispers, see a few curious looks. Jun assists us to the back exit. "Yah, Jun," I say, grabbing his arm. "Don't forget Jooheon, eh? He's still inside with his managers. Make sure he won't leave piss drunk."

"Yeah, you and him gonna to be okay?" He asks, pointing at Jackson who's busy hailing a cab. There's a knowing look in Jun's friendly black eyes, a gleam in his pearly white smile.

"Oh we're just friends." Shit. It made Jun bark a laugh. "I just wanted to clarify that... In case you got any wrong ideas. Ben seems to be pretty determined to sasaeng the hell out of him so..." I'm speaking too fast and laughing way too awkwardly now. I hope I'm not sounding like a defensive liar because I'm really not. Why am I feeling so conscious about this? The cab comes and Jackson opens the door for me like a true gentleman.

"Take care, Princess." He pinches my cheek fondly with his big hand and leads me to the taxi. Jackson follows me inside, a look of curiosity passing his face before telling the driver my address. I lean over Jackson and roll the window down to wave at Jun, feeling the wind from outside hitting my face and the exposed skin of my torso. The big man waves back which makes me smile as I sit back beside Jackson.

"Are you and that guy really close?"

"Yeah, he's assigned to me because I get mobbed by fans when I leave the club."

"What?!"

"Oh and Jun reminds me of my old nanny back in Australia." I say, not minding his question. "They both look really mean but they're warm and fuzzy inside." I settle for some silence and Jackson doesn't push his luck by asking me about my safety. He's seen Jun, the man is taller and bigger than him even with his solid muscles. He does taekwondo and jiu jitsu, and he's pretty good at blocking cameras.

Jackson seems to be in zen zone right now. I notice he's calmer when he drinks, and not the other way around like most people. He doesn't talk much, just smiles broadly and is even less touchy. I lean my head on his shoulder as fatigue befalls me. "Oh! That place!" Jackson suddenly says, my head jerking away in the process. He asks the driver to stop, pays him with cash, and pulls me out of the cab.

"Jackson, what the heck?!" I say, as we rush out of the taxi. "Where are we going?"

"I saw the restaurant Dong Wook hyung and I went to a few years ago!" He says excitedly, his hands firmly gripping my wrist as we run towards a non-descript building. There's a restaurant just around the corner that boasts of samgyupsal and samgyetang, both of which I start to crave the minute the delicious smell of meat hits me. We enter the restaurant and the owner, an old smiling lady who walks and talks slowly, greets us with such sweet giddiness. She recognizes Jackson from Roommate 2 and tells us he's been watching Jackson's TV appearances since then. I can't really blame her for fangirling, I would be combusting by now being with my former bias had we not been friends for over a year.

It still gets to me, somehow. The fangirling. I may be talking to chart-topping idols in elevators, or drinking with celebrities and their managers, but it still feels surreal. As we pose for some photos with the restaurant owner, I realize that my life took such a weird turn so suddenly and I wonder how it all even began. One of the waitresses recognizes me from my music video with Amber and points it out to the owner. "Ah, maja? [Ah, Is that right?] Are you guys dating?" The owner boldly asks.

"A-aniyo," [N-no] I whine, making Jackson laugh while he's busy cooking meat. "Nae namja chingu eobsoyo." [I don't have a boyfriend.]

"Ah, wae?! [Ah, why?] You're so pretty! Yah—" The eommoni slaps my arm playfully, a wistful look registering on her face. "You want to find a real handsome man? Yeogi! [He's right here!]" He points at Jackson whose eyes go instantly wide. "Don't you see him as a man?"

"Aigoo, eommoni. I can't, he's my dongsaeng." I explain that I'm older than Jackson by three years though I asked him to speak casually to me early on because I feel more comfortable that way. Saying I don't see him as a man would be a lie. Sometimes he's even more of a man than Mark in my eyes. But of course I won't say that. Of course. The old lady finally leaves us to eat in peace and Jackson happily chows down his Korean barbecue.

We settle into silence again, something I've never experienced with Jackson before. He seems tired but happy. It's amazing how he manages to keep quiet around me, who's often the quieter one. "You know I realize we never really get alone time, the two of us." I finally speak up.

"Yeah, I know. You get alone time with Bam and Mark, but you never talk to me," There's a pang of guilt that hits my chest the moment he mentions Mark's name. I keep quiet. Mark hasn't messaged me all day.

"What do you mean?! Of course I do."

"No you don't! You let BamBam call you Babe. You talk to Mark on k
Kakao all the time and he talks about you non-stop, it's getting annoying!" Jackson complains while turning the meat on the grill. I stop eating, letting his words marinate in my head. He talks about me. He talks about me to the rest of the boys. Our eyes meet and we both stop, realizing we've stumbled upon something. "I mean, I don't hate that he talks about you, it's just weird. Like, you know Mark, he never talks..."

"I know." I stuff the lettuce into my mouth. Please. Please don't make me talk.

"But then he suddenly tells me that you like vanilla ice cream, and that you met Troye Sivan. He thinks Troye's brother has a crush on you. He said Andrew has a crush on you too, that and that you—Oh, I remember he told me you guys met up in LA!" I just nod, stuffing more food into my mouth. I can feel my chest constricting. The wheels in my head are turning around so fast, I actually feel dizzy from thinking too hard. "How? Why?"

"Well," I say, trying to keep my food down. "My friend asked me to come with her to a business trip in L.A. and while she's busy I met up with Mark and Andrew and Jessica."

"What did you do?"

"They taught me how to skateboard, and we visited his old school, and we ate at their house—"

"Oh my god, their house is huge, right?"

"Yeah, it's huge. It's bigger than my house, Christ. I don't know why he's even working, he's filthy rich!"

"I don't know. So, what else did you do?" He casually asks before eating another piece of meat. He gazes at me curiously, obviously fishing for more information. Jackson is good at studying people and reacting based on his observations—that fact I noticed well while editing. He may be such a clown on camera but he's not stupid. In fact I'd say he's one of the smartest friends I have. Maybe that's why he and Rap Monster are such good friends.

I decide to play it fair and be honest. He's one of Mark's best friends after all, I'm sure he'll understand. "We drove around, we went to the beach and then we went back to my hotel."

"Your hotel?! What do you mean?" he further asks, eyebrows knit together.

"What do you mean what do I mean?" I hate that he's pretending not to get it.

"I mean, why did he—did you kiss, is that it?" He whispers, even if we're the only people in the restaurant at that hour.

"Ki—Jackson, are you seriously asking me that?" My cheeks feel hot, my voice is breaking, and I can't believe he's actually making me say it out loud.

"Yes, I just did!" His face registers confusion and I consider for a moment that maybe he really doesn't understand what "we" and "hotel" looks like together in one sentence.

"Okay," I put my chopsticks down and look at him straight in the eyes. I feel like I'm about to explain the birds and the bees to a child. "Yes. We did kiss... A lot... and more. Any more questions?!"

Silence.

"Oh my god..."

"Yup."

"You mean you..."

"Yup."

"Did you really?!"

Silence.

Jackson's aghast face makes me sigh so hard. "Yes," He doesn't answer so I take the opportunity to clarify my position. "Hey, he's an adult, okay. I may be older than him by a few years but he started getting really touchy, like, I swear he wanted me to kiss him first, so I did. I kissed him at the beach. Then he took me back to my hotel and we had sex... Twice."

"Oh my god..." Jackson desperately reaches for his glass of water and downs the remaining of it in one go. "I feel like I just ate something really spicy. Noona! Bul juseyo?" [Noona! Can I have water please?] He calls out to the waitress who immediately comes forward to refill his glass. I glance at my reflection in the window beside us and realize I'm blushing profusely.

"Jackson..." I softly say, my heart slamming in my chest. Will he tell? Is he mad?

"Wait..." He holds his hand up as he drinks more water and wipes the sweat on his forehead with a tissue. Then he looks at me with weary eyes, face almost pained. I'm finding it harder to keep eye contact because the shame is starting to sink in and I'm not liking it one bit.

"Jackson, please promise you won't say a word to anyone about this... Not even BamBam, or JB." I plead.

"Of course I won't, what are you thinking?! Our manager would kill me and Mark if anyone finds out." He sighs before going back to grilling meat. I shift in my seat uncomfortably.

Liv knew something was going to happen before I even texted her that we're claiming the hotel room. Jihoo saw Mark leave my apartment at 6AM the day he arrived from Busan, and of course I had to explain because I can't come up with a lie that would sound convincing enough. At least now he doesn't suspect me of being BamBam's girlfriend. Amber figured it out that same day. And now Jackson. Jackson is staring at me with wide eyes, shock and disbelief still visible on his face. I smile apologetically, hoping he's not judging me but knowing that deep inside he is a but disappointed in me. "To be clear, we're not dating. We're just friends."

"Thats the same thing you said to Jun and eommoni about us." He says, voice rising in a matter-of-factly tone, chopsticks pointing at me rudely.

"But it's true!"

"Yeah, us, we're just friends, that one's true. But you and Mark hyung... I don't know," It's the first time I'm hearing Jackson address Mark as his older brother. Sure I've heard it on tape a few times but in real life, the way he says "hyung" kind of reminds me how highly he respects Mark. "So every time he goes missing from the dorm, you and him..."

"Yeah, we've been doing it for months. But we're safe, don't worry." I affirm. Jackson shakes his head a bit and rolls his eyes the way I know he always does when he's upset. I've seen that so many times but I don't think I'll ever get used to it. It hurts knowing he's disappointed in me.

We end up in silence again. Everyone who knew about us told me to be absolutely careful, but Jackson is so far the only one who's disapproving. It's different for him, I guess. He's under the same contract. It's like reviewing so hard for an exam and getting average scores, and then finding out your classmates have higher scores when you know for a fact they cheated. He's probably hurt, and maybe even a tad bit jealous. "I'm sorry..."

"No, stop, don't be sorry. I'm not mad, I'm just shocked." He gives me an exhausted smile and puts more food on my plate. "Okay, let's stop talking about it. Let's NEVER talk about it. NEVER."