Chapter 25

Friday

It was 3:45 am when Thor finally got the text from Steve alerting him that they'd found him.
It was after 4:30 before Steve finally walked with him through the door of the apartment. Loki still clutching his cell phone in one hand as Steve gently guided him inside. His love's face looking so downcast and weary, he still hadn't looked up to meet Thor's gaze and that troubled him greatly.

"Thor's here," Steve was saying gently. "You going to be okay?"

Loki glanced up briefly and Thor caught how red and puffy his lover's eyes were. It took everything he had not to just rush over and embrace him tightly. But Loki just gave a curt nod and Steve patted him on his back as the leaner man made his way further into the apartment, setting his phone on the counter as he went. Thor thought he was limping at first, his step decidedly off kilter, but he then noticed it was because he was missing a shoe. Thor looked up to Steve and sighed as he finally felt some relief. At least his lover was home, he was finally home safe and sound.

"Thank you Steve," he said, he could see how tired the other man was. Heck they all were, having literally been up all night looking for Loki.

"It's no problem," Steve replied quietly as he watched the leaner man heading to the kitchen. "You two get some sleep. Buck and I will handle the rink tomorrow. " He said turning to leave, then paused to add. "Call me if you need me."

Thor nodded and turned slowly to watch as Loki fumbled through his meds. He approached cautiously, afraid of his love taking off again. "Lo," he began softly.

He saw it in slow motion, Loki's hands were trembling terribly. They fumbled with the cap and the whole bottle just flipped up in his hands, spilling tiny blue pills all over the floor. He saw Loki watch them and his face crumble as if they'd betrayed him somehow, and knew in his lover's current state that would be all it would take. The final straw to break him. Loki let out a great sob and just collapsed straight to the floor, his back pressing against the cabinets as he covered his face. The empty pill bottle still grasped hopelessly in his one hand. Thor quickly rushed forward, ignoring any trepidation as he wrapped his arms around his love, sitting next to him and pulling him gently against him.

"Shhhh Lo, I'll get them," He soothed, stroking his back gently. "Don't worry about it, I'll get them." he assured him. He expected a struggle after Loki's actions earlier, but the leaner man just melted limply into his embrace. His shoulder quaking as great sobs wracked his body.

"Oh Lo," Thor urged, finding his own tears now spilling as well in the face of his lover's sorrow. "Please, I beg of you, tell me what it is that I have done, so that I can fix it."

Thor at first didn't think he'd answer as his love just pressed further into him and shook his head. Thor continuing to hold him as his love's grief ran it's course, crying himself out until he finally took a deep breath, seeming to quell the storm of tears for a bit. "You can't" he said so quietly Thor almost missed it.

"Please Lo," Thor begged, squeezing him a little tighter. "Just tell me."

"It's not you Thor," Loki stated pushing back against the larger man's chest, and Thor loosened his grip a bit, but refused to let go completely. Not again. "It's me. It's always me. And I can't be fixed."

Thor just looked at his lover sadly as Loki wiped his eyes and looked around at the pills scattered about on the floor. Picking one up and popping it into his mouth. He had no answer for him, he knew from his reading on the subject how hopeless the disease made you feel. How it made you feel as though you were a great burden to those around you. But he still had no idea what had triggered this all to begin with.

"Maybe I don't want to fix you," He said getting slowly up and helping Loki to his feet.

Loki just glanced up at him briefly. No smile, no frown, just blank weariness as he met his gaze. "Go on to bed," Thor urged. "I'll clean this up."

Loki nodded in resignation and shuffled off, leaving Thor to look upon the litter of blue pills with a sigh. He was just cleaning the last ones up when Loki's phone gave the low battery chime from where it sat forgotten on the counter. Thor grabbed it to plug it in and saw there was a text, but it wasn't from his number as he would have assumed. No, he recognized that number. It was etched into his brain from it's glorified place in Loki's little black book. Fandral. "You have to tell him" it said.
Nothing more.

Thor stared at it, feeling a chill of anger for this other man that he'd never met. What did his text mean? Tell who what? Thor perhaps? Was he conversing with this man the whole time that they'd all been out looking for him, instead of answering Thor's desperate please to just let him know that he was okay? Was Fandral his boyfriend, despite Loki's constant denials of having such close relations with people? Was that what Loki needed to tell him?

He was gripping the phone so tightly that his knuckles were white, and it was only with great effort that he finally put it down on the counter and plugged it in. Moving with a sigh to go check on Loki. Any questions he had would have to wait, and as he gazed upon his lover's lean form laying curled up towards the wall, his back to him, he felt the anger melt away. It was just a text, it meant nothing in the light of his lover being home. Home safe and sound.

Loki had stripped down to just his pants, and Thor moved to go pull the cover up over him. Not daring to climb in with him in light of all that had happened. But as he turned to leave, his wrist was suddenly snatched and he looked down at the pale hand holding him tightly. It was a desperate sort of grip, as though afraid Thor would leave and never return. Thor felt his heart clench and smiled at his love as he slid silently in behind him. Wrapping his arms about his waist and holding him to his chest. Whoever this Fandral was, Loki had chosen to return to Thor. To spend his nights with Thor and none other. That had to mean something, didn't it?

Thor awoke finally somewhere around noon and carefully extracted himself from his love to get up. Sleeping all day wouldn't bode well if he wanted sleep again that night. And he still had a lot to get done the next day. Despite all that had happened in the last 24 hours, he HAD to keep this appointment with Jane. He knew if he rescheduled now, that it would just dog him and eat away at him. He had to get this done and over with.

He took a shower and headed to the couch, dressing in loose sweats and a tee shirt as he plopped down and idly began flipping through channels on the TV. His mind rolling over and over where he possibly stood where Loki was concerned. Was this just another blanket day, or was it more? He still had no idea what he'd done to set it off. And what about that text?

He was drawn out of his thought as a very grumpy looking lean man shuffled towards the couch. Climbing over him and wedging himself between the cushion as Thor made room for him. Smiling at Loki's attachment to him even when sleeping.

"I thought you'd left," Loki murmured from his chest. Thor felt his test tighten at his love worrying over such. All doubt about his place here by his lover's side, washing away with those scant few words.

"I'm not leaving you Lo," Thor stated, kissing the top of his head gently. No longer caring about being overly intimate. "Do you want to talk?" He asked a bit hopefully.

"No," Loki said with a sigh.

Thor frowned, but he hadn't expected anything else. He then spotted the one forgotten shoe, still laying where Loki had apparently kicked it off last night. "Will you at least tell me what happened to your other shoe?"

"They're putting in new cement out by Jottenheim Mall," Loki said, letting out a deep breath as he settled further against the larger man. "I didn't see it in and my shoe got stuck. It was too much of a bother to get it back."

"Lo, Jottenheim Mall is over twenty miles away," Thor exclaimed in horrified recognition. "Did you walk all the way out there last night?"

"I had a lot on my mind," Loki replied with another sigh.

"To be discussed with somebody else," Thor spouted, taking a deep breath before he let his temper get away from him. He couldn't allow that, not with Loki. Not ever again. "I'm sorry, I saw the text on your phone last night. You left it on the counter and when I went to plug it in..." He took another steadying breath as he braced himself for an answer he might not want. " Just tell me, are you seeing somebody else?"

"No," Loki said with a sigh.

"Lo.." Thor began, but Loki cut him off wearily.

"Thor, I'm really tired," he said burying his face against his chest.

"Okay, Lo," Thor conceded, giving him a gentle squeeze as he tried to refocus on just watching TV and enjoying having his love pressed against him. At least he could push one crazy idea from his overly full mind. Loki wouldn't lie to him, he knew that no matter how evasive he was, he wouldn't lie. But still, what was that text about?

Wow, only one more chapter yet to go. Can you just feel the suspense? So Loki takes really long walks when he's upset, and talks to Fandral apparently. But what is their relation? And what set Loki off to begin with? Though many of my clever,clever readers have already guessed.
Thank you to everyone for leaving comments.