For that moment, I just wanted to cry, I just wanted to let it all out, let out all the pain, the hurt that I kept inside for so long, but it quickly ended when the front door sprung open and I heard Jade's voice say "Whoa!" I pulled away from Jay quickly, wiping the tears from my eyes with my hands, as Jade closed the door and quickly moved to the dining room, placing a hand on my shoulder "Are you ok?" she asked concerned. "I'm fine" I answered quickly, wiping the excess tears from my cheeks with my hands, as I took a deep breath. I turned back to Jade as I asked "By the way, you wanna tell me how the boys ended up with Jay?" Jade glanced over to Jay who was now sitting back in his chair at the table, who simply held his hands up in a "I'm staying out of this" manner. Jade turned back to me "Well, you said you wanted them somewhere safe…" she said with a smile. I looked at her, as she simply shrugged, while she walked past me, making her way to her bedroom. Moments later, Jade and the boys came out, as Jade spoke "I'm gonna take the monsters out to get some pizza, you two wanna come with?" I smiled down at the boys when I spoke "Nah, it's cool…bring me back a slice ok?" I said, ruffling Jesse's hair, as the little boy nodded. Jade looked over to Jay who lifted Jacob up in his arms, tickling him on the tummy, before he responded "I've spent all day with these monsters, I think your Aunt Lily, could use some time with Christian…Huh?" he asked, looking at Jacob, who nodded his head in agreement. I couldn't help but smile when Jesse piped in "As long as you don't kiss her, she's a girl" making a disgusted face. Jay set Jacob down, as he reached over and tickled Jesse a bit, as Jade walked the boys out of the apartment.

I sat back down at the table, resting my head in my hands. I wasn't as nervous being around Jay alone, like I had been ever since he arrived. Just like Jade had said it was all about the boys now, and whatever was between Jay and I was just that, history. I looked up to Jay, taking a deep breath, as I spoke "So shouldn't you be heading back to Orlando sometime?" Jay smiled as he walked over, pulling his chair next to me, as he sat down "Nope, I'm working an injury right now, so I have plenty of free time, and I figured it would be best spent out here" he explained and I couldn't help it, as I retorted "Why?" Jay chuckled a bit to himself, when he reached over, his hand covering mine that lay on the table. Jay spoke "Because I want to help, I want to help Jacob, and Jesse, and you" I brought my eyes up to meet his, when he continued "So let me help…I'm sure I can get you a great attorney, money is no object to me".

I jumped from the table, pulling my hand from his grasp as I spoke "No, I can't let you do that" I said was I walked over to the kitchen, suddenly interested in the dirty dishes that lay in the sink. Jay continued to sit at the table, as he turned to face me, "Why not?" he exclaimed in a frustrated tone. I set the dirty cup back in the sink, as I sighed before continuing "Why not? Jay! Me and you aren't together anymore, so I refuse to take pity from you!" Jay stood from his seat, walking over to the counter across from the sink, as he fought back "Well since you've brought it up, Why aren't we together anymore?" I rubbed my face with my hands, as I retorted "I don't want to talk about this" as I tried to walk out of the kitchen, only to be cut off by Jay who sprung from his position on the other side of the kitchen, to the walk way. "No more running Lily, we're gonna talk about this" Jay said as he walked into the kitchen, I backed up every step he took towards me, until my back was against the fridge. I refused to back down, as my mind repeated the reasons why I had cut off Jay in the first place "You really want to know?" I spat back, as Jay's body pinned me to the fridge. Jay smiled as his blue eyes bore into mine, when he responded calmly "Yeah, I want to know".

I took a deep breath, as I broke the eye contact Jay was intent on keeping with me, I took a deep breath and then spoke "Ok, number 1, you deserve better than me, no matter what you say…number 2, I got too attached to you, and let's face it, everyone I get attached too always ends up breaking my heart at some point in my life…number 3 you have to hate me after what I put you through…and number 4…well…let's face it…I'm always gonna be a fat chick, and you are always gonna be in a higher class than me…it just wasn't gonna work" I spurted out at him, refusing to look into his eyes, that were desperately trying to reconnect the eye contact. I looked all over the kitchen, anywhere but in Jay's deep blue eyes, when I felt his gentle fingers grasping my chin, bringing my eyes to meet his, as I fought the next round of tears that was trying to escape. My eyes bore into his as I spoke in barely a whisper "Jay…please don't make this ha…" I was cut off as Jay suddenly leaned forward, his lips meeting mine, his tongue immediately darting into the dark cavern of my mouth. My body tensing up, as I felt his lips pleading with mine to dance with his, and I just couldn't fight it anymore.

I have yearned for this since I left Tampa, I wanted to kiss him again, I yearned to feel his lips on mine again, and now I couldn't help but kiss him back, as the passion that ran through my veins was exploding, as I returned the kiss with just as much passion as he was putting into it. I could feel his body pressing against mine, holding me in place against the fridge as his lips, and tongue continued to dance with mine. Suddenly a thought crossed my mind "You have to stop this" I heard my logic and mind scream at me from the inside, as I took control and pushed Jay off of me, breaking the kiss. I swiftly moved to the other side of the kitchen, getting out of his grasp as I struggled to catch my breath from the kiss he just bestowed on me. My thoughts were running, as I tried to justify the kiss I just had with him, when I spoke through panting breaths "That was a mistake". My eyes glancing over to Jay, as he leaned his back against the fridge, his arms across his broad chest, he spoke softly "Why?" I ran my hand over my face, and through my hair as I spoke "Cause you took advantage of me, I was in a vulnerable state and you took advantage of it" I said directly, and even I didn't believe those words, that just came from my mouth. I watched as Jay threw his head back in laughter as he practically yelled "Advantage of you? Please, you were kissing me back Lily!" I shook my head no, as I explained "Then what would you call it?" My eyes gazing into his blue ones, as he spoke softer with a smile on his face "I'd call it fear"

Those were fighting words to me, no one ever called me chicken, as I could feel myself get defensive, as I leaned against the counter next to the sink. I scoffed at his answer as I retorted "I'm not afraid of anything, maybe I just didn't like it" I watched as Jay pushed himself off of the fridge, him standing across the kitchen from me as he spoke "Afraid of liking it too much?" as he took a step closer to me "Afraid of liking me too much?" he spoke again as he took another couple steps towards me. At this point my body screamed 'run', but I refused to let him win, and think I was scared. Although deep in me, I knew Jay was right, I was scared…I was scared of taking a chance and getting hurt…but I refused to let him know he was right, I had too much damn pride for that.

I watched as he took a few more steps closer to me as he spoke again "Maybe you're afraid of loving me?" suddenly only a few feet from me, Jay swiftly stepped forward, collecting me in his arms, holding me tight against his body, as his lips met mine. The kiss was rough at first, but as soon as his lips touched mine, the kiss turned gentle, as I could feel his tongue slowly moving over my bottom lip, begging me for access. Jay was like a drug to me, I just couldn't get enough, I gently sighed as he slipped his tongue deep into my mouth, causing a moan to come from my chest, as my tongue danced with his once again. My arms finding their way to around his neck, my fingers gently running through the small hairs on the back of his neck, as I enjoyed letting the passion take over, letting Jay dominate the kiss.

The kiss broke, both of us out of breath, as I felt Jay's soft fingers cupping my cheeks, making me look deep into his blue eyes as he spoke, through panted breaths "Tell me you don't love me" he whispered out, still nuzzling my nose with his. I couldn't say those words, I couldn't flat out lie…I've never been a good liar, and I knew I wouldn't be able to say those words, when I heard Jay speak again "You can't say it, I know you love me Lily" he said as he began leaving butterfly kisses across my face. I had my eyes closed, feeling his lips moving across my face, to my ear when I heard him whisper "But I want you to listen to me" as I felt his lips leaving a soft, trail down my neck. I opened my eyes, when I felt his lips leave my skin, I looked deep into his blue eyes, his face just mere inches from mine, as he spoke I could feel his breath on my lips as he spoke "Listen to me Lily, I love you, I would never hurt you…" his lips gently running across mine for a moment, as he pulled away and continued to speak "I know your scared, but I know you love me…" his lips meeting mine again gently. The gentle kiss breaking as he continued "I'll wait for you Lily, I'll wait as long as it takes, until you're ready to take a chance on you're heart" I felt his hand grasp mine, as he pulled my hand to his lips, letting his tongue gently run over my knuckles as he spoke again "Right now, I'm happy just to stare at you, imagine you in my arms, in my life…and in my bed" as he once again brought his lips to mine, this time initiating a deeper kiss, as I felt his tongue slip past my lips into my dark cavern, probing for my tongue to dance with his.

It's like he was teasing me, as I continued the kiss, when suddenly the door flung open and I heard Jesse and James laughing through the door. Jay and I pulled apart quickly as the two little boys came running into the kitchen area, each holding a small soda in their fingers, as Jade followed them holding two pizzas. Jade took in how both Jay and I were out of breath, our flush faces, and I watched as a knowing smile crept across her face "Everything ok in here?" she spoke with a smug smile. "Everything's fine" I stammered as I glanced to Jay, who was simply smiling as he leaned against the fridge, I ran my hand through my hair, then directed my attention to the little boys. "What ya got there boys?" I asked as I smiled and paid attention to the little guys standing near the dining room table.

The night progressed, as we all enjoyed our dinner of pizza and soda. Jay stayed as we watched the boys battle it out in Guitar Hero, and then soon enough we all settled down to watch a movie, what we didn't know was how exhausted we all were. Jacob and Jesse laid on the floor, Jade reclined in the recliner, as Jay and I sat on opposite ends of the couch. The next morning, I felt the familiar touch of skin running over my arms, as I opened my sleepy eyes. I hadn't realized we all fell asleep, and when I opened my eyes, I realized I was no longer sitting upright, I was laying across the couch, my head resting in Jay's lap. I looked up to see Jay smiling as he looked down into my eyes, his hand running over my arm, as he whispered 'You awake?" I smiled as I sat up "I'm sorry, I don't know how that happened" I said blushing, as Jay reached over, running his hand over my back, as he retorted "You fell asleep sitting upwards, you looked so damn uncomfortable, so I moved you." I looked over to him, "But how did you sleep?" I asked concerned he hadn't slept all night, I watched as Jay stretched his arms "Please I'm used to sleeping upright, I've slept half of my life in planes, buses and other crappy motels" he answered with a smile, as I scoffed a bit. I watched as Jay stood, and made his way to the door, as I got up from my spot on the couch following him "I should get back to my room anyways." He spoke, almost bashfully, as I nodded. Jay walked outside of the door, as I stood leaning against the door, when he spoke "Look, I'd love to watch the boys again today…Give you some time to get things in order". I smiled as I responded "Are you sure? I can't impose on you lik…" I was cut off, by Jay resting a sole finger on my lips, bringing me to a hush. Jay spoke " I like spending time with them…" I smiled as I nodded my head in agreement, letting Jay know that I would let Jade drop the boys off on her way to work. I watched as Jay started to walk off the porch, when suddenly, he turned back to face me, lunging at me, his lips met mine. The kiss was brief, as I felt his tongue quickly swipe across my lips, the kiss ended quickly, when he simply spoke "I meant every word I said earlier…I'll be waiting for you" he smiled wide, and made his way to the parking lot, as I closed the door behind him. I locked the door and made my way back to the living room, when I heard Jade sing, her voice still groggy from sleep "Let's get it on…" she sang in tune to the Barry White song. I rolled my eyes, simply responding "Bite Me" as I made my way down the hallway, to my bedroom, enjoying sleeping in my bed for once in a long while.