Snape looked around him, trying to get some bearing on where in the hell he was. Everything was bathed in a bright white glow, and he knew it should be hurting his eyes, but it didn't. He stood up slowly.

And this is death he thought. Rather unspectacular.

He realized he was on the playground near Spinner's End. This is an interesting place to end up…

"Sev" said a soft voice from behind him.

He spun around, and there she was. Sweet Lily. He had waited for this moment for so long, and now that she was here before him he couldn't collect his thoughts enough to even speak to her. He simply stared.

"Thank you" she said. "Thank you for protecting my son and helping him to reach his destiny. Harry lives, and the monster is dead."

Severus let out a sigh of tremendous relief. It hadn't all been for nothing. "Lily I am so sorry…"

She shook her head and smiled. "Still trying to apologize after all this time and all you have done to redeem yourself? Don't let it trouble you anymore Sev. Let go of your guilt."

"I wasn't very…"

"Nice to him?" She laughed. "Neither was my sister, but you both looked after him and helped to make him the brave man that he is today. Besides, could anyone have really expected Severus Snape to make anything easy for the son of James Potter?" Her eyes sparkled with humor. "I daresay you did him a favor, teaching him that life isn't easy. The lesson served him well."

"What now?" he asked her.

Her smiled widened. "That, my dear friend, is up to you. You can go on to see what awaits you beyond… or you can go back and mend that poor girl's shattered heart. You've earned some happiness Severus."

"Tamara" he whispered. She would not take his death well, he knew that.

She nodded.

"I won't forget you Lily" he said. "I… always…"

She leaned over and kissed his cheek. "I know Severus."

"Severus?" McGonagall said gently.

He opened his eyes, and then shut them again as he was overtaken by a massive headache. He groaned.

"Oh thank heavens!" she sighed. "We weren't sure if you were going to make it for a while, so it is a relief to see you awake. Potter thought you had died, otherwise someone would have come along sooner."

He tried to talk, but his throat hurt badly and only a strangled noise came out.

"You had a nasty set of bites to the neck, and it's best to let it rest for now." He recognized the voice of Madame Pomfrey.

"Potter told us the truth" Minerva explained. "I apologize Severus, for what I said to you in the great hall. You are many things, but a coward is certainly not one of them."

He tried to give her a nod of thanks, but that brought a tremendous jolt of pain from his neck and he froze, wishing he could at least have the relief of a good scream.

Madame Pomfrey pressed a vial to his lips. "Here. Have this. Just a pain potion, and by the label, I believe you were the one who made it. It'll help."

She was right, it did help. He still hurt, but at least he could think now. He managed to open his eyes again, and he carefully tried to look around to see if he could find Tamara.

Taking a good guess at what he was looking for McGonagall said "Miss Brookes is here."

He finally saw her curled up asleep in the chair next to his cot. He was horrified by her appearance. She looked like someone had smeared red paint on her face. Severus realized that since she wasn't in a cot herself, it must have been his blood.

"She saved your life" Madame Pomfrey said, sounding impressed. "Not an easy feat either. Not sure how she did it honestly, as it shouldn't have even been possible under the circumstances."

McGonagall spoke up again. "She hasn't left your side, just stays right there. She won't eat anything, and we can't even convince her to wash off the blood. She's not well I'm afraid. On her way in she caught sight of the bodies of some friends and she collapsed."

He raised an eyebrow in question.

"Remus Lupin and Nymphadora Tonks" she explained.

Severus closed his eyes again as his heart broke for her. Shattered heart indeed he thought. If he hadn't chosen to come back…

"We lost many in this fight Severus, and I am pleased that we don't have to count you among them" she said kindly. Then she moved toward Tamara.

"Miss Brookes? Tamara?" she said, trying to roust her. There was no response so she gave her shoulder a careful nudge.

Tam's head shot up and her eyes flew open. "Hmm?" She looked wild-eyed, and Sev wondered if this whole mess would prove to have driven her mad.

"There's someone who I think you'd like to see" Minerva told her, gesturing in his direction.

She spun her head around and when she saw him looking at her she threw herself out of the chair and into the cot with him. He moved his arms around her immediately, and as she let loose with a slew of incoherent words and sobs he stroked her hair to try to calm her.

Madame Pomfrey had already moved on to tend the many other patients, and Minerva, giving Severus a sympathetic smile, said "I'll leave you two to your reunion. She'll be all right now Severus. I daresay you're just what she needed."

He knew she was right. Bless Lily, if it hadn't been for her he wouldn't have known to come back.

It took a while. But eventually Tamara managed to calm down. She told him she just wanted to keep looking at him to enjoy the fact that he was here and he was alive, and that it was finally all over.

"When I see Harry Potter I'm going to kiss him" she said, wiping the tears from her cheeks with her sleeve.

Severus smirked, imagining Potter getting leapt upon by this wildly disheveled bloodstained woman.

"When I find out who did in that bitchly snake I've got a kiss for them too" she snarled, her eyes narrowing. She sighed, and then smiled at him. "I love you Sev. They told me that Harry killed Riddle with expelliarmus. He blew away like burnt loo paper." She laughed madly.

"Ah, you're awake Professor!" boomed a happy voice. It was Hagrid. Filch was standing behind him, looking nervous.

Tamara pulled out of Severus' embrace and flung her arms around the big hairy gamekeeper (well, as much as she could anyway). "Thank you so much Hagrid! I couldn't have ever gotten him up here on my own, you came just in time."

The big man blushed, and patted her head. "Oh, never mind that. I'm just glad we found ye." He looked over at Snape, and gave him a respectful nod. "I'm very happy to see you recovering Professor. Harry told us all what ye've been up to. It's a brave and honorable thing you did and we owe ye a lot."

Snape very carefully tilted his head in acknowledgment. He poked Tamara with his toe, and pointed at Hagrid and then at himself.

"He can't speak yet" Tam explained. "But I think he wants to thank you too."

Severus nodded again.

"You're very welcome sir. It's an honor to have been able to help. The truth is Miss Brookes here is the one who did the real work. I'm told she worked on ye all night long. When we came along… why I've never seen such a thing…" he shuddered, and blushed again. "Anyway, I'd best be gettin' along but I wanted to stop in and see how you were doing."

Filch caught Tamara's eye and she shocked everyone by giving him a hug as well. "Thank you again Argus." The caretaker's face went a bright reddish purple and he nodded to her and Snape before quickly escaping.

Their next visitor was Harry Potter. "Sir" he said to Severus. "It's good to see you. I thought you had…" he looked embarrassed. "If I'd known I would've sent some help, but I really didn't think that …"

"You did exactly what you were meant to do Harry" Tam said appreciatively, and Severus carefully nodded his agreement. "You didn't know it but I followed you to the boathouse. I wouldn't have found him in time otherwise." She grabbed his hands and kissed him on the cheek. "Thank you so much for destroying that monster you wonderfully brave man."

Harry smiled at her. "You're very welcome. I had a lot of help along the way" he looked meaningfully back at Severus. "Help that I'm very grateful for."

Much to his surprise (and Tamara's as well), his old potions professor flashed him a most uncharacteristic grin and gave him a muggle thumbs up gesture. Harry laughed.

"Harry can you tell me who it was that did away with that horrid bloody snake?" Tam asked him, still obsessed.

Harry understood why she wanted to know. He'd seen the brutal attack from even closer than she had.

"It was Neville. Neville Longbottom. He cut its head off with the Sword of Gryffindor actually."

Severus let out an amused snort. Well isn't that something? Good for Longbottom he thought.

Tam's grin was that of a madwoman, and Harry felt a little nervous for her.

"Fantastic!" she squealed. Then she mumbled "Bitchly bloody beast…" She shook her head quickly as if trying to shed some unpleasant memories. "If you see Neville, please send him my way so I can properly thank him."

"I will" Harry said. "He stood up to Voldemort too you know. Looked him right in the face and refused to give up. Nobody fought harder than Neville did."

Deciding that Harry might want to speak to Severus alone for a while Tamara excused herself under the pretense of looking for Mr. Longbottom. She didn't find him, but later that day Neville himself did in fact show up. He was still nursing a pronounced limp, and was looking rather beat up from the battle, but there was a confidence around him that made Tamara smile, and she could tell Sev was pleased.

Tam did give him a kiss for killing the snake, and told him that they'd wanted to see him to thank him for all he'd done during the battle, and before it, standing up so valiantly against Voldemort and his minions.

Neville had always been terrified by Professor Snape, and now Severus felt a bit of guilt at having been unfairly quite nasty to the boy. He remembered what Lily had said though; about how sometimes not making things easy was actually a favor. He hoped that was the case here. He made a decision to seek Neville out when he could speak again to properly congratulate him on his heroic efforts.

They had a lot of visitors over the next few days. The castle was already being magically repaired, and the place was still bustling with activity. There was deep sadness for those who had been lost, but simultaneously a great satisfied joy moved among them all. There was a sense of family and solidarity among everyone, even people who previously had disagreed or not even known each other. It was a moving thing to behold. Tamara felt it all with her empathic gift, and she let herself bask in it as she watched Severus slowly recover.

Horace Slughorn came to see them frequently and made Tamara promise that they would come to visit him for a dinner engagement over the summer. She truthfully looked forward to it, as she enjoyed the company of the cheerful older fellow. Severus was now able to communicate with a pencil and paper, and he teased her about her fondness for Slytherin potions professors.

Sybil Trelawney stopped by once and gave them a prediction that they would marry and have four children, and Tam had to fight back her giggles at the faces Severus made. Tam didn't mind. It was a tremendous relief not to have to hide her feelings for him anymore.

Professor Sprout brought them a lovely pot of enchanted red Snapdragons that Tam kept on the small bedside table. Severus would amuse himself by tossing the plant bits of his meals that he didn't want.

Minerva of course checked in on them every day. She kindly kept Severus supplied with books and newspapers, knowing he was desperately bored. It was much appreciated. He was getting antsy, more and more by the day, and Tamara began to worry that she wouldn't be able to keep him horizontal much longer.

Madame Pomfrey and the other healers who had been sent by the Ministry to tend to the Hogwarts wounded agreed after a little over a week that it would be ok now for Severus to move from the hospital wing back into his old quarters in the dungeon, as long as things went well when he tried to speak again. So many of the wounded had been sent to St. Mungo's that it was quite full, and the cases who were expected to fully recover, such as Sev, had been kept at Hogwarts. Tam was glad for that, as was Severus. He hated the idea of being stuck in St. Mungo's even more than he hated being stuck in the school hospital wing.

Tam waited nervously, holding his hand, as he first attempted to speak. Minerva had come to be with her in case things didn't go as they'd hoped.

"Tamara" he said, and while it was a rougher sound than he usually made, it didn't sound any worse than if he'd had a cold or a sore throat.

She grinned at him.

"I've been wanting to say this for months" he declared. "I do love you and to hell with bloody Voldemort and this whole sodding mess I officially retire!"

McGonagall and Madame Pomfrey exchanged amused smiles, and Tamara kissed him full on the mouth, not caring who saw her.

When she finally released him he said "I want to go to your flat in London and spend a very long time getting to know you all over again without having to worry about spying, hiding, sneaking, fighting, avenging, defeating dark wizards, protecting students, or, thank you Albus, being forced to commit murder. Do you think we could manage that?"

She nodded. "Absolutely."

The healers insisted he stay for another two weeks, but he was at least allowed to move into his quarters again. Tamara of course stayed with him. She told Minerva, who was now Headmistress, that she wanted to resign from her position at the school. It was a sad decision for her, as she had spent the best and worst times of her life here, and it seemed more like home to her now than anywhere else. She knew though, that it was time to move on, at least for a while. Severus had more than earned his retirement, and she wanted to be wherever he was. She wanted to give him a chance for a life of his own, that didn't revolve around a mission to save the wizarding world.

Tam talked Madam Pomfrey into allowing them to take a stroll into Hogsmeade one afternoon. She knew it wasn't exactly exciting for Severus, after all the times he'd had to chaperone students there, but it was a trip out of the castle, anyway. They stopped into the Three Broomsticks where she got a butterbeer and he insisted on a bit of firewhiskey.

She leaned happily on his shoulder, remembering again how close she had come to losing him forever, and silently vowing to herself that she would never take his presence in her life for granted but rather cherish every moment of every day that she had with him.

Two women sat down at the table behind them and Tam heard one of them whisper (loudly) "Look Eltsie, that's him! There he is, that death eater what took over the school!"

Tamara stiffened, fighting the urge to spin around and turn the woman into a big fat toad.

The second woman scoffed. "Oh yes, they're spreading some rubbish now that he wasn't really a death eater but a spy on our side, but you know it's a load of bunk. Trying to make it out like You-Know-Who tried to kill him or some such nonsense. My nephew was up at that school while he was in charge and it was a house of horrors believe you me. They can say whatever they like, but to me it is inexcusable. I heard it was him that murdered poor old Albus Dumbledore. Ought to be in Azkaban…or just flat out executed."

Tam's hand twitched, wanting to reach for her wand, and Sev laced his fingers through hers, shaking his head gently. He was asking her not to make a scene, she knew. It was unlike him to be so attacked and not have anything to say about it, and it made Tamara all the more determined to stand up for him. His lingering guilt was troubling, as she personally saw nothing for him to be guilty about, in fact quite the contrary.

"Sweet, why don't you go pay the bar maid and I'll meet you outside. I need to use the facilities" she suggested, giving him her most innocent smile, though she knew at the moment she probably looked as innocent as a rabid wolf.

He sighed, knowing better, but got up and did as she asked. Tam did in fact go to the loo, giving him time to get outside. When she came out she calmly walked over to the women at the table.

"Hello" she said sweetly.

They looked at her as if she were Bellatrix Lestrange back from the dead, and said nothing.

"I just thought you should know, I happen to be a teacher at Hogwarts myself, and I kept my post through the difficult months during the war. Severus Snape kept many children from being outright tortured and murdered while he was Headmaster there, which is what Albus Dumbledore had intended for him to do. You see, he was a very loyal friend to Albus, whatever you may have heard."

Neither of them dared look her in the eye, and they still didn't speak. She knew she was likely accomplishing nothing, but she couldn't help herself.

"If you should happen to see Mr. Snape again, look closely at the bandages around his neck. I watched Voldemort's giant snake maul him, and I was bathed in his blood desperately trying to save his life, so when I hear people speak falsehoods about him I tend to get a bit riled. You will, I can promise you, never in your lives ever share airspace with a braver wizard than that one. Consider yourselves lucky for the opportunity, and consider your nephew lucky that Severus was able to protect him and the other students from what would have happened to them had he not been there. Good day to you ladies."

She didn't turn around to see their shocked expressions, as much as she wanted to. She felt it better to just keep walking. A hand reached out and touched her arm as she passed the bar.

"Miss Brookes?" It was Horace Slughorn. "Tamara? That was a lovely thing you just did for Severus. I know it doesn't come close to what you've already done in saving his life, but… it was very admirable of you to defend him that way. He'd have been terribly embarrassed if he'd seen it, but it was the right thing to do. I wanted to tell you that, and to let you know that should I hear a word said against him I too will be sure to correct the offender."

She was deeply touched by what he said, and felt her eyes misting. "Thank you Horace. That means a lot. I'm sure we haven't heard the last of it by any means, so knowing that there are those who will speak on his behalf…" she swallowed hard so she wouldn't start to sob. She moved forward and gave Slughorn a tight hug.

He patted her on the back. "No trouble, no trouble at all. After everything I think it is the least we can do to see to it that the stories are told correctly." She saw his eyes travel back in the direction of the women she had spoken to, and letting her curiosity finally win, she glanced at them as well. To her satisfaction, they looked decidedly ashamed.

When Tam stepped outside she saw Severus outside talking to Neville Longbottom. She had to smile, as she knew all too well that Neville had feared his old potions teacher for several years. That was all in the past now, as Neville had recently proven that he didn't fear anything anymore. She caught the tail end of their conversation.

"Thank you Professor, that really means a lot coming from you sir" Neville was saying.

Severus extended his hand to the young man and Neville shook it happily. Tamara had to fight tears yet again. All of the emotions she had felt recently, both of her own, and coming from everyone else… she felt very overwhelmed much of the time.

When she reached them Neville gave her a big smile, which she returned before they started back to the castle and he headed into the Three Broomsticks.

"What did you say to him?" she asked.

"What did you say to those nasty old hags?" he asked her with a sly smirk.

She giggled. "Wouldn't you like to know?"

"Wouldn't you like to know what I said to Mr. Longbottom?"

She sighed, knowing she was beaten. "I simply set them straight on a few facts. Horace Slughorn heard me and said that he would do the same should he hear any more garbage like that. It's nice to have good friends. A lot of them are more like family really."

To her surprise, he nodded. "Yes, I'm beginning to notice that. I wanted to tell Neville that I am very impressed with the wizard he has grown into. By all accounts he put up a singularly ferocious fight, and I thought it appropriate to congratulate him."

Tam smiled again. "That's excellent Sev."