Disclaimer: "Bum Reviews" is owned by Doug Walker.
Note: I am fully aware that there is no "Kingdom Hearts" movie, but I couldn't think of a better one for this character to review.
And now it's time for Bum Reviews, with Chester A. Bum.
Tonight's review: Kingdom Hearts
"OH MY GOD!!! THIS IS THE GREATEST MOVIE I'VE EVER SEEN IN MY LIFE!!!"
"There's this kid, with very large shoes. And he's like: "I want to go to other worlds."!"
"And then there's this mouse, who's apparently a king. And he's like: "I'm leaving and I'm not telling you why, coz you can suck it. HAHAH!"
"And they are out to stop these little monsters, called Hear-ma-tuh-less!"
"I was a Hear-ma-tuh-less once! At least, that's what my girlfriend used to call me. Which was so unfair. Especially after I ate hers."
"So these monsters, are all out to steal people's hearts, and then these people also turn into these monsters."
"Oh, so they're vampires!"
"Except that they don't suck your blood, don't look attractive, and don't have teeth. Didn't I see that in "Twilight" already?!"
"And this kid is fights these monsters, and is helped by Goofy and Donald Duck!"
"I was a duck once! What plastic surgery can't do for you."
"And so our heroes travel to many different worlds! Frontierland, Fantasyland, Discoveryland, Adventureland,..."
"Oh wait, wrong world."
"And so our heroes travel to see Aladdin, Alice, Jack Skelington, Tarzan,..."
"Wait a minute they're still going to Disney World!"
"That's what I like about this movie, it brings me to places I can never imagine going."
"Unless I'm high."
"This is Chester A. Bum saying.... CHANGE!!! You got change?! Ah come on! Help a guy out here, will ya... come on, change!"
"Well can you at least help me get to Disney World? I heard they need a new bum character!"
THE END