Title: The Girl who would be Queen
Author: Starbuck1980 (Livejournal and Tumblr)
Fandom: Once Upon a Time
Pairing: Swan Queen
Rating: NC17 for trigger warnings, language and sexy times.
Summary: Spoilers for Stable Boy S01E18 & Fruit of the Poisonous Tree S01E11 and references to The Return S01E19.
Emma is sent a book, similar to Henry's containing the story of the Evil Queen's past and it makes her question everything she knows. I am ignoring the whole M&M jail storyline. (Mixed Fairy Tale Land with Storybrook) Warning this is dark & twisty, see triggers below.
Trigger Warnings: Child abuse – Physical and emotional, emotional neglect. Cutting/suicidal tendencies, flashbacks, nightmares, Self-loathing. Please consider before you read this if you have been/still are affected by any of these. I write from experience so these scenes are fairly detailed and could be difficult to read. I do not in any way condone cutting but having lived with this tendency for a long time, I understand it. I am also in no way saying that if you are affected by abuse, you should keep quiet. In fact if you or someone you know has been affected by any of these topics, please consider seeking help. There is someone out there who can and will help you and if the first person doesn't believe someone else will.
Disclaimer: I own nothing; if I did OUaT would be taking a very different path with this pairing. Chapter titles are taken from various Evanescence songs; part twenty-five is taken from Missing. All rights belong to Disney/ABC and Amy Lee/Evanescence.
A/N: I really, really, really hate King Leopold. Thank you for all the messages sent yesterday, I was rather overwhelmed by all of them. Thank you again to ibee85 for providing me with the transcript for 'Fruit of the Poisonous Tree' (episode 11). Again I have used the original dialogue but have also added an extra scene in this chapter. Prepare yourselves for the end because there are only THREE more chapters…
Part Twenty-Five – Though I'd die to know you love me.
And if I bleed, I'll bleed,
Knowing you don't care.
And if I sleep just to dream of you
And wake without you there,
Isn't something missing?
Isn't someone missing me?
- Missing, Evanescence
"Regina sat by the fire in her chambers weeping softly as her father entered the room. Their time was limited he knew this but he had to see his daughter all the same.
'Daddy…' Regina croaked, rising from her seat and almost falling into her father's embrace.
'Don't cry sweetheart,' her father soothed, 'Soon you will be free of this life.'
Regina pulled herself away from her father's embrace to look questioningly into his face. He smiled back at her, a twinkle in his eye.
'I will never be free daddy, never… This is what mother wanted, why does she hate me so?' She said, falling back into his embrace. Her father patted her back reassuringly before taking her arms and sitting her down.
'I have found a way for you to be free of the King once and for all,' Henry said, lowering his tone to just above a whisper. Regina frowned, not following her father's words.
'How?' She breathed, her tears drying against her cheeks.
'You need to convince the King that your heart belongs to another, the genie,' Henry began reaching up to wipe away the last tears on her face. 'I know he gave you the mirror, his intent is clear. If you make the King believe your heart belongs to another. I am almost sure he will trust the genie to find out whom.'
'No daddy, it is too great a risk. If the King finds out we will all be executed,' Regina whispered back, frowning as she searched her father's face.
'Please sweetheart, just listen to my plan,' He pleaded, squeezing her hands in his own.
'Your plan or mother's?' Regina asked coldly, her tone rising in desperation.
'Your mother just wants what is best for you, Regina,' her father said, looking away from her harsh glare.
'No daddy, she only wants what's best for her. Never for me,' Regina stated rising from her seat, walking away from her father.
'Regina, honey, please listen to me. It is a good plan, it will work but you need to do everything she says, alright?' Henry said, fully believing this plan would work. He rose and took hold of her forearms; silently pleading with his daughter. When she didn't speak he took it as a sign to continue.
'You need to convince the King that your heart belongs to another, write it in your diary and leave it open where he is most likely to find it,' her father instructed.
Regina's eyes snapped up to her father's kind face but she kept quiet.
'The King trusts this genie. He will instruct him to find the man who has stolen your heart,' Henry continued. 'Your mother is procuring an Agrabahn viper; I will then convince this genie that this is the only way to set you free. You must then convince him that you intend to use the vipers to kill yourself, freeing you from this life.'
Horror dawned on his daughter's features. Henry knew she was afraid but this plan would work, Cora had assured him of this and she had never been wrong when it came to the future of their child.
'You will not go through with it, sweetheart. You will just convince him that you intend to, thus playing on his love for you and he does truly love you,' Henry explained, 'He will then set the vipers lose in the King's chambers.'
'Daddy, how do you know he will even do this? You expect me to take this great risk but you cannot guarantee that he will go through with this,' Regina said, pleading with her father to see sense.
'Do you trust me honey?' he said earnestly, trying to catch her eye. Regina let out a breath, turning her back to her father and closing her eyes.
'Daddy, it's not a question of trust. I trust you, I don't trust her,' Regina answered, not turning around to face him.
'She only wants what's best for you. You will be Queen in your own right. You could marry again, find love again. Start over,' He implored, clutching her arm.
'I will never find love again, never! I don't want to marry again,' Regina snapped, whirling round to face him. A flash of pure anger exaggerated her features and made Henry think of Cora, and then it was gone as quickly as it came. Regina fell against her father.
'I have no choice, do I?' She whispered burying her face in his shoulder and breathing in his familiar scent.
'Your mother is already making the preparations,' Henry said quietly against her ear before kissing her cheek. He sat over her as she wrote the words in her diary, struggling with the quill in her shaky hands.
Almost a week later Regina was under house arrest after the King had read the excerpts in her diary. The plan was all falling into place."
Emma strode into the station early on Wednesday morning. It had been two days since she had left Regina in her bathroom and she hadn't heard word from the mayor. On Monday morning she got the message from Regina's assistant saying that the mayor was off sick and would need to cancel all town meetings for the next few days. At least someone had spoken to her. Emma breathed out a small sigh of relief as the weight bearing down on her lifted a little.
She had hardly slept for the past two nights, her mind going over and over the things she knew were fact and what she thought had been fiction. Her mind swirled around three separate thoughts; Regina had killed Graham, her best friend was in fact her mother and she was deeply in love with the mayor of Storybrook. Her chest ached every time she thought about Regina, desperation clouding rational thought. She had professed her love, promised she would never leave and then stormed out; shattering the minimal trust she had struggled to build between them. She pushed the pain down and locked it up until she could work out how to forgive the woman she loved for her litany of crimes.
The most recent being Graham's death.
Regina hadn't even seemed sorry but somewhere deep inside Emma knew she was. Emma just hadn't reached a place where she could forgive and forget the grief was still too fresh.
Regina woke just after dawn, her head banging from drinking too much. She wasn't even sure what day it was but she knew her assistant would be calling sometime after eight o'clock. She struggled to her feet, staggering into the bathroom and wincing as she flicked on the light. Her father's razor mocked her from the counter where Emma Swan had left it; she hadn't touched it since the blonde had left. It glinted at her before she stared into the mirror, glaring in disgust at her haggard reflection.
The last two days were a blur of drinking until she passed out; she'd barely eaten and hadn't bothered to shower. She'd taken her pills on time and that was one thing she had maintained, visions of her mother forcing her hand. She turned on the shower, setting the water to scolding before stepping over the edge of the tub.
Emma Swan had left; it didn't exactly surprise her she thought bitterly as she let the searing water soak her hair and run down her back. It was time to pick herself up. This had just proved to her that she had been right all along; no one could be trusted with her heart. She was beyond redemption. She had survived this long and she would go on even if Emma Swan broke the curse.
It was time to get answers.
So Gold was her father, finally her life seemed to make sense. She was born of two evils; it only made sense that she herself was evil too. Her chest ached as Emma Swan's words played over in her mind: your true power is within yourself. Maybe it was but without the blind hate that had been pushing her forward all these years she felt deflated, void of purpose, empty. Something was missing and although she missed Emma desperately there was more to it than that.
Emma had ignited a flame, allowing a glimpse of a person long ago forgotten but all that remained of the girl she had been before was an empty shell.
She thought then about the words Gold had spoken during their last meeting. They had been discussing the curse, it was his creation and she had specifically asked him why he created the curse and he had told her to figure it out. Well she would find out what Gold's motives were and she knew just the man to help her.
'Mr Booth, you are ten minutes late. Some of us have towns to run,' Regina snapped as August stepped through her office door after a brief knock, her best mayoral mask in place. She sat with her hands clasped on top of the desk, glaring at him as he approached.
'My apologies Madam Mayor, I got held up,' August said as he sat down opposite her, his long legs stretched out to the side. 'What can I do for you; your note wasn't very specific.'
'I believe congratulations are in order,' Regina said frostily though her tone was light, a smile playing on her lips. She wasn't sure August would go for this but she had very little to lose at this point. August frowned for a moment before he took the bait.
'I'm not quite sure I follow Madam Mayor?' He replied, keeping his tone light folding his hands in his lap as he frowned back at her.
'Emma Swan,' It took most of Regina's strength not to gasp at the pain stabbing through her chest when she said Emma's name. '…It looks like you succeeded in your plan, Mr Booth. Emma Swan believes,' Regina said lightly, watching August intently looking for signs she should continue in her plan to obtain information.
'Um… I'm not sure I understand what you're getting at,' He said again but he couldn't control the recognition as it flashed across his eyes.
'Oh come now… You know perfectly well. Isn't that why you sent Emma that book? You can continue to deny it but Emma and I have become… What would you call it?' She tapped a finger against her chin, her eyes directed at the ceiling as she pushed away the words that would have accurately completed that sentence. She forced her mask in place, smiling before she met August's eyes again, 'We've come to an understanding. I know about the book and I know you sent it to her, I even know who you are…' That part she still wasn't sure on but it was enough to call his bluff.
'Alright,' August said slowly, 'If you know all that then what do you need me for?'
'I want to know what Gold has to do with this and you are going to tell me,' Regina said simply grinning at him. The smile was even half genuine as Regina enjoyed the buzz of manipulating him.
'And why would I tell you?' August asked, 'and forgive me Madam Mayor,' he continued, 'but just because you say Emma believes doesn't mean I trust you,' He said slowly, eyeing her for a moment as the smile fell from her face and a scowl replaced it.
'Well Mr Booth you will just have to call Sheriff Swan and ask her, you may as well confess you stole that book whilst you're at it,' She declared as she sat back down in her chair, never breaking eye contact with the man who sat opposite her. He frowned again and cleared his throat.
'I also assume you know who I am… Who I really am, I mean?' Regina continued her tone frosty as she narrowed her eyes for effect. She could play the best of them. 'And if you don't tell me, I might just have to call Sheriff Swan myself and explain to her how you confessed.' She pulled a Dictaphone out from under her desk. It wasn't exactly a confession and she hadn't even pressed record but the intent was there and all it took was for August to believe.
'It will be enough for the Sheriff to bring you in and it wouldn't really do to be locked up now would it, not with your little problem,' she said indicating to August's legs as he crossed them uncomfortably. What the problem was she wasn't sure but he had been walking strangely when he came in. She watched his face twitch and knew she had been spot on.
August let out an exasperated sigh not really seeing a choice in the matter. He inclined his head slowly in acceptance as she grinned widely again.
'Very good. I am so glad you could see things my way,' Regina said leaning back in her chair.
'Seeing as you know who I am, you will also know that I enacted the curse. Am I correct in that assumption?' She asked, showing a little trust in order to receive some. August only nodded, a frown still etching his forehead.
'Excellent. Do you know who created the curse?' She asked, eyeing him for a moment. He knew this was a test.
'Rumplestiltskin,' he said carefully, he knew it was the truth. He had done the homework. This time Regina only nodded, smiling back at the man before her.
'Do you know why?' Regina asked airily implying that she already knew.
'He created it in order to find his son,' August stated.
'Go on,' Regina prompted, trying to keep the impatience out of her voice.
'His son, Baelfire was transported here by a magic bean not long after he became the dark one. Baelfire didn't like what the dark magic had done to his father and asked the Blue Fairy for help,' It sounded a little crazy upon reflection, he thought and he didn't like the way Regina's lip curled into a snarl when he mentioned the Blue Fairy.
'Yes.' Regina prompted sharply, trying to contain her snarl.
'The Blue Fairy gave him a magic bean and told him to go wherever it led him. Rumplestiltskin made a deal with Baelfire to go to this place untouched by magic. When the time came he couldn't go through with it and Baelfire was sucked into the portal without his father,' He finished, running a hand through his hair.
'And? Is that all you know?' Regina snapped and August raised an eye brow at her.
'Baelfire was his driving force. Rumplestiltskin met with the Blue Fairy and figured out that if he created a dark curse, it would bring him here to this land but there was one problem. He didn't have the necessary magic to enact the curse. I think you know the rest,' August said reluctantly.
'Not everything…' She said slowly trying to put the pieces together in her brain.
'Who wrote the book that you sent to Emma Swan?' She asked, still struggling over the Sheriff's name.
'That I don't know but I wouldn't look further than Rumplestiltskin, only he really knows that much of your history isn't that correct?' He asked, raising his eyes brows at her as she struggled for a moment to maintain her composure.
'What do you know about that book? Did you read it?' Her eyes narrowed again in suspicion.
'I know that he's your father and I think you are putting enough of the pieces together to understand why,' He said, watching her closely as she struggled further with her composure. She took a breath, getting up from her seat and distancing herself from the man behind her desk. When she didn't answer right away, he continued,
'He knew he needed to create someone who could enact the curse, he knew the result if he procreated with your mother. A seed of darkness would be planted not only in her heart but in your own but it would need time to be nurtured and only love could counter act it. That's why he chose your mother; he knew she had it in her to create that person,' He said finally putting the pieces in place for her. Regina struggled to keep herself upright; she took another breath forcing her emotions down as they threatened to consume her.
'Yes… Well… I don't really think that's any of your concern,' Regina said, her voice slightly hoarse with emotion, 'You may go, Mr Booth.'
August stood up to leave, pausing for a moment a few feet away from her.
'You can trust her, you know?' He said taking in her posture as she gazed out the window, her arms hugging her middle.
'I'm sure I have no idea who you are referring to,' Regina stated as she swung around to meet his gaze, it was then he noticed the tears glistening back at him.
'Emma. You can trust her, she cares about you a great deal,' He informed her gently, his brow creasing in concern.
'What would you know about it,' Regina snapped, suspicion flaring.
'Well, she knows the truth and I don't see her breaking down your door, pitch fork in hand,' He remarked as he turned to leave, closing the door behind him.
Regina watched him leave before leaning against the wall behind her and sliding down it to sit on the floor, an ache in her chest as her love for Emma bubbled to the surface, heedless of all attempts to force it away.