*Friday, five days later*

The first week of college had been hectic, but Denitra had managed. In between being hounded by various reporters wanting to get the exclusive - a detailed account of what it'd been like to be held captive by the Leader of the Saints and forced to be his love slave - and fighting off her overprotective mother, she was adjusting to college life pretty well considering her history. She hadn't been able to attend school on the first day due to the emotional stress she was under. Everyone had wanted her to talk about what she'd been through, wanted her to press charges against Jamien so they could go after him.

She wanted nothing to do with him.

No one understood what it was like for her, the pain she felt. She loved him with all of her heart, held back only because she didn't want him to ever get hurt because of her. But he held back from her for his own selfish reasons. He'd seen the extent of the damage Layla's death had on her sanity. He even went so far as to try to hold her together, for his own amusement, she supposed. But he was the cause of her pain. If it hadn't been for him, Layla would be alive now. They could have been classmates, pursuing a degree in education like they'd always wanted. Layla was more than a friend. She was family. She was someone who had big plans and a bright future, unlike so many others. She deserved to live, to be happy.

She was torn between her loyalty and love for Layla and her love for Jamien. Her chest constantly ached, as if her heart was bleeding. She convinced herself that she shouldn't want to be with a guy who did the things he did - he was a menace to society - because he could never give her the one thing she ultimately wanted the most, a family of her own. It was like putting a bandage over an open wound that needed stitches. It worked now, but how long would it last? And she could never forgive Jamien, no matter how much she loved him or how desperately she wanted to be with him.

She stepped outside of the mathematics building and was caught off guard by a strong gust of wind. She struggled to hold on to her books and a purse with one hand as she used the other to make sure her brown cotton peasant skirt didn't pull an unattractive Marilyn Monroe without her consent. Once it passed, she fished through her purse for her keys and headed towards her car. She only had one class left for the day, English, and she needed to exchange the stuff she had for that class.

She scanned the parking lot for her car, a royal blue Neuron, and nearly tripped over her feet when she spotted it. On the side, in between her and her car, sat a black Temptress with a custom rose on the hood. She looked but saw no one around. She shivered, whether out of fear or anticipation she wasn't sure. She hurried, hoping to get the stuff she needed and get to her class before he appeared. She unlocked the door and tossed her stuff inside, papers scattering everywhere. She pulled out her binder and closed the door, then saw someone's reflection beside her own.

"Hey, Dee."

She screamed and jumped, turning around to face him. She exhaled sharply, then reluctantly looked up at him. He looked like hell. The first and most obvious thing she noticed was that he'd neglected to shave in a few days. There were dark spots under his eyes as if he hadn't slept in days, and his hair was a mess. His eyes were as intense as ever. She immediately dropped his gaze, not wanting to go free falling with her heart into his arms again. Even if she knew he'd catch her. The cool fall air kicked up again, this time making it a little harder to breathe.

"How's school?" His tone was light, conversational. She looked at him then away again. Though there was anger in his expression, there was also hurt and pain. She had to keep reminding herself that he'd brought this on himself.

"It's going well. My teachers are all pretty understanding of...what I've been through...so they're not as strict with deadlines yet." His finger touched her chin, gently forcing her to look at him.

"You look pale and your face is cold." His thumb stroked her cheek then his hand went for her hair.

She took a step back, frowning. "It's cold outside. If you don't mind, I have to get to class." She tried to step around him but his hand caught her arm and held on tightly.

"Are you okay? Have you been taking your medicine? I know it's been a rough week for you."

"Don't worry about me."

"If I don't, who will?"

"Jamien, you look like shit. Why don't you go worry about yourself instead of me?"

His voice dropped to a whisper. "You're a part of me."

She froze, unable to avoid looking into his eyes. What she saw there nearly hurt more than seeing that picture for the first time. If she didn't get away from him soon... "Let go of me."

"We need to talk. I've given you more than enough space by now." His voice was steady, and the words sounded rehearsed.

"Did you try moving to another planet? I have nothing to say to you, Jamien." She tried to jerk away. If she stayed angry, she figured she had a better chance of staying strong. She'd shed enough tears already. Any more and the dehydration could land her in the hospital.

"I thought you said it was harder to pretend you didn't care for someone when you really did have feelings for them." He frowned.

Her chest tightened, making her stop and look at him. "It is."

"You're doing a damn good job now." Now he was frowning, too.

"Well, you can't read minds." Tears filled her eyes. The urge to turn and put her arms around him was strong - he'd been touching her for too long. Her resolve was crumbling. She pulled away. "Good thing, huh?"

He licked his lips, thinking of saying one thing, but instead came out with, "We need to talk."

She shook her head and put a hand on her hip. "About?"

"Us."

Who knew one little word could nearly destroy what little was left of a person? "What about us?" Her voice sounded weak, and she hated it.

"Dee, this isn't the place."

"This is the only place you're gonna get. Now or never."

He groaned and rubbed his face. "Do we have to do it like this?"

She folded her arms, hoping it wasn't obvious that her arms were itching to hold him. She hated this. Once again, her heart and mind were at war over him. She had allowed her heart to claim victory then, and it had cost her dearly. She was sure finding out he was Layla's killer wouldn't have hurt nearly as much if she didn't love him. "You're wasting my time."

"Then can we do this when you have plenty of time? You have, what, one more class before the weekend starts. Just agree to meet me after class." He shoved his hands into his pockets and leaned against her car, facing the car next to them.

"How do you know my schedule?" She narrowed her eyes at him, suspicious. He looked away.

"I have a few people here that owe me favors. That, and I've been buying more property...including the university." He had the grace to blush.

It took a few seconds for that to fully sink in. "Are you fucking serious? You bought the university?"

He nodded. "Not because of you, I swear. Though you are a definite bonus."

"I can't be bought, you asshole."

"I didn't say I was buying you, moron. You just happen to study here so it's a bonus for me."

"I can just transfer."

He shrugged and smiled. It seemed like it was something he hadn't done in a while either. "And I'll still own the place. I didn't buy the university to get close to you. The opportunity presented itself and I took it."

"Then why are you here now?"

"I was driving by, saw your car...thought I'd come see you. Try to talk to you again."

She remembered his previous attempts, all by letter or messenger. All rejected. "Consider this a win. We've talked." She turned away again and started walking. With each step, it became a little easier to breathe, but the pain got worse, like a knife twisting in her chest. "Goodbye, Jamien."

"You say that with a lot of confidence. You think you won't see me again?"

"Not if I can help it."

She heard him chuckle. "Trust me, babe. You can't."

She was happy to come back to the parking lot and find him gone. However, when she got to the spot where her car had been, she flipped out. She couldn't remember if she'd locked the door after getting her stuff, so she automatically assumed someone had stolen it. But then she'd remembered that he hadn't walked there. A few spots over, was the Temptress, with a little piece of paper fluttering in the wind, trapped against the windshield by a wiper blade.

"He fucking wouldn't..." Against her better judgment, she went over to the car and snatched the paper free.

Meet me down the street at Anabelle's.

"Son of a bitch!" She screamed, stomped her feet, then kicked the car. There wasn't a time, as if he'd be there all day and night, happily holding her car hostage. She yanked the door open and cursed - the keys were in the ignition, just for her. That pissed her off even more. As she continued to rant and rave, she realized that he'd probably planned for it to happen like this. He'd distracted her so she forgot to lock the door. Easy access. She realized that she could keep the Temptress and let him have her car, but somehow she knew he hoped she'd do just that.

She'd have a constant reminder of him, not to mention if she truly cared for the car, she'd have to take it to him at some point so he could have the maintenance taken care of. Manipulative son of a bitch. She threw her stuff into the passenger seat and got in. He'd regret forcing her to do this...

The car smelled strongly of him, mint and cigarette smoke. Did he drive it often or was it just because he'd driven it today? She shook her head and turned the key, giving life to their car. Their car. Christ, she needed to hurry up and get her car back. She missed the restaurant twice before she was able to slow it down enough to get the parking spot out front, behind her car. It was not meant to drive less than sixty miles per hour.

She marched inside and looked around. The place smelled divine. She got hungry just looking at the plates the waitresses were carrying from the kitchen to the tables. The restaurant had a cozy feel to it, like sitting at the table at a beloved relative's.

"Can I help you?" The hostess appeared next to her. "Are you meeting someone or are you by yourself?"

"Meeting someone. Black hair, blue eyes."

The girl immediately blushed from her forehead to her chin, smiling like a love-struck puppy. "Oh, him. He said he was meeting someone. Follow me." She grabbed Denitra's hand and pulled her towards a table near a window where Jamien was busy doctoring a cup of coffee that sat on the side of her car keys. "Here she is."

He looked up at her and a pleased smile graced his lips. His lips. Denitra took a deep breath and summoned her anger. "Hi, Dee. Hungry? Madeline here tells me that Anabelle's meatloaf is the best in the state."

Though she wanted nothing more than to snatch up her keys and run for the door, she found herself sitting in the chair across from him, taking a menu from Madeline. "My mama makes the best meatloaf in the state."

"Then you should order the meatloaf dinner and compare. It never hurts to be sure." Madeline smiled brightly, batting her eyelashes at Jamien, who was staring at Denitra.

"Whatever." Denitra put the menu down. "I'll get that and a glass of water."

"And you, sir?"

"Same." He put down the menu and slid it towards the edge of the table. Once the hostess and the menus were gone, Jamien smiled wider. "I thought waitresses were supposed to take orders, not the hostess?"

Denitra rolled her eyes. "Normally, but apparently if a guy is attractive enough, all the rules go out the window."

"So, you still think I'm attractive?" She expected to see cool conceit in his eyes but found innocent curiosity. She sighed and allowed her shoulders to drop, nodding. "That's good to know. Pierce said that if you're not attracted to me, there's no point in trying to fix things between us."

Though she had tried to be as angry with Pierce as she was with Jamien, she found it damn near impossible. "Pierce is full of good advice, isn't he?"

Jamien pushed aside his cup and reached for her hand. His hand was warm on top of hers, igniting yet another urge to have his arms around her. "Yeah, he is." His fingers lightly stroked the back of her hand. "You never said if you've been taking your medicine."

"Don't worry about it."

"So that's a no. If you were, you'd tell me just to shut me up."

She snatched her hand away and sat back in her chair, folding her arms across her chest. "I've gone longer without my medicine." She made sure he caught her annoyed glare. "Besides, I'm spending the weekend at my parents' house in Stilwater. I'll take my medicine when I get there tonight, okay?"

"Promise?" He held out his pinky.

She could only stare at it, unable to understand why such a stupid, silly gesture meant the world to her. She started to reach for it when two plates were on the table in front of them. She quietly picked up her fork and sampled the meatloaf. "Ugh. It's nowhere as good as mama's." She moved on to the sides, finding them much more edible.

"Are you willing to listen now?" His voice was a whisper. She looked up at him then nodded her head once.

He inhaled and exhaled deeply. "I didn't kill her, okay?"

She froze. "I don't believe you."

"I know, that's why I did some digging to find this." He reached into his back pocket and pulled out his phone. He tapped the screen a few times, then put it down on the table and slid it towards her. "It's not gonna make you happy, but it proves I didn't do it."

She picked it up, unsure if she wanted to see what she knew he wanted to show her. Years of therapy hadn't helped her cope with what she didn't see. The video started, and immediately gunfire was heard. It wasn't long before Jamien, with shorter hair, backed into the view of the camera. He aimed his gun but didn't fire. His mouth moved but she couldn't hear him over the background noise. His eyes widened with shock and Layla stumbled into his arms, holding onto him in desperation as she spoke to him.

He picked the phone up and turned it off. "I was in the middle of a gunfight. You'll have to guess what happened after that, with her being that close to me. I don't want you to see it."

She was quiet for a while, pushing the food around on her plate with her fork. "Why didn't the police go after you? If this came from a camera in the store, then they knew who you were and could charge you."

"It's circumstantial evidence. You don't see me actually shooting anyone. This only says I was there during the shootings with a gun. It doesn't prove I instigated anything." He looked down at the phone, turning it over and over in his hands. "Legal Lee was able to get it tossed out, forcing the DA to drop the charge."

"Must've made your damn day."

He looked up at her. "This is my first real relationship, Dee. I've never had a serious fight with someone I loved before so I don't know how to deal with this, don't know what I should say. How do you convince a person you love them enough to do whatever the fuck it takes to make the argument go away?"

"In normal relationships, one normally doesn't have to explain why he killed his girlfriend's best friend."

He tried not to smile at her casual use of the word girlfriend. "Apparently, this isn't a normal relationship, considering how we met. And I didn't kill her."

She'd reached her bullshit limit of the day. She stood, snatched up her car keys and tossed down his own. "Whatever. It doesn't matter whether you shot her yourself, held her against you so that someone could shoot her, or simply waltzed through the damn building. You created a situation that ended in her, along with a lot of other people, being killed. The fact that the police know it was you, but can't do anything about it, makes me sick. People who think and act like you are the reason there will never be peace in the world."

"People like me are the reason there are peaceful moments - you have to do whatever's necessary to achieve it."

She stared at him then shook her head. "Goodbye, for good, Jamien."

"Wait." He caught her hand, causing her to turn around and look at him. There were no words she knew to describe the sad and lonely look in his eyes. "If this never happened, where would we be now?"

"Why would you torture yourself with those kinds of thoughts?"

He closed his eyes and shook her hand. "Just answer me, please."

She allowed herself to pretend that it all had never happened. That Layla was still alive, attending college with her here in Steelport. She imagined that she'd met him instead on campus, maybe as he bought the school or met a friend. She could see Layla cheering her on, encouraging her to go on a date with Jamien. The ache in her chest returned, bringing on another wave of tears.

Layla was the type of person who firmly believed in love, despite the surrounding circumstances. Layla would have encouraged her, even now, to love Jamien despite the past between them all.

She snatched her hand away, scowling through tears and pain. She wasn't Layla. Past relationships hadn't hurt her the way they'd scarred Denitra's heart. When the person you loved fucked your heart over, they were supposed to suffer just as much. It was only fair...

"Where would we be?" He repeated in a broken whisper.

"We'd be together, in love." She wiped her tears away. "Maybe for just a little while, maybe forever. But I'd love you with every bit of me, and you'd never be alone as long as I had a say so. But, there's a consequence for every bad decision, and yours cost you dearly."

She backed away then turned on her heel, determined to never see the man again.