BPOV

Chapter 25

I can't believe this is happening. I'm such an idiot!

I have no right to be mad at him. I mean we aren't even together. This is just like any other time he fucked someone so why am I getting pissed.

He did tell you he liked you. Apparently not enough...

When I walked in on the two of them all over him I swear my heart split into two. I have never felt anything like that before in my life. Then I fucking cried like a girl.

Alice told me he loved me. Yeah right, why would he? Even if he does it's obvious he loves the game more.

The look on our friends' faces was heart braking, like I told them I killed their puppy or something. Once I cried myself out I had no tears left, I didn't have the strength to even feel my emotions. I think that scared them more than the tears themselves, the fact that I had no emotion left.

I raced home on my bike. I needed to get out of there before I went back and killed the two bitches pawing at the man I love. Fuck.

When I got home I ran straight into the house and locked the door. I couldn't deal with unexpected visitors right now.

About one minute after I had locked the door I heard someone knock it. NOT NOW! I screamed in my head. I made my way towards the door and unlocked the door.

I immediately tried to slam it shut again but he was too fast he shot his hand out and walked through the door before shutting it behind him.

"What do you want Jasper?" I asked trying to stay calm.

"You" he said looking straight into my eyes and he didn't fucking hesitate as he said it. Shit.

"You had me. Now, not so much. I have no right to be mad at you coz we were never officially together so it's not my place but…I don't wanna be one of the many Jazz. Sorry." I said clearly to him.

He stepped towards me "I don't want you to be one of the many. I want you to be the only one Bella. What you saw today was not what it looked like honest. I know it sounds like some bullshit excuse but I was waiting for you in the theatre when they came at me. You walked in the exact moment before I pushed their asses to the ground. I swear Bella, I didn't initiate it and I definitely didn't return the gesture. Before they could do any more I shoved them away. I don't want any one but you Bella." He finished his speech and I so badly wanted to believe him. He sounded so sincere.

I stared at him for a long time not sure of what to say.

"Jazz…I…I want to believe you. I really do but it's just that…It's really hard to believe it when the game is something that we have been playing since what seems like forever. I just…I don't even know" I really didn't know what to do.

He took another step forward and stroked my cheek, I leaned into his touch.

"I need to think" I said as much as it killed me. I took a step back and looked into his sad eyes.

"I'm sorry Jazz but I just…I need time to sort through my thoughts" I said.

He smiled sadly and nodded a little "I understand Bella. Just…figure it out soon please. I can't stand to be away from you for to long." He whispered.

Just as he was about to shut the door he whispered "I'm really sorry Bella" and then he shut the door.

He apologized even though he did nothing wrong…at least I don't think he did. I think I believe him. But how can I believe him. Can we be together? What about the game? Will this happen again? Can we be together without always wondering if the other wants the game more than the actual relationship?

I have a headache now…way to go Bella.

Well tomorrow is gonna be fun.