A/N: I'm glad so many of you felt gratified by Jeremy calling BS on Tyler finally. It was definitely time. Thanks for all the wonderful feedback! / bb1019, "frustrating and fabulous update" - TY & LOL, so many of my chapters fall under the former right? Haha Sorry, guys. More drama ahead.

Chapter Twenty-Five

Tyler paced his bedroom and the walls seemed to shrink around him. They may as well, because his life without Jeremy wasn't just smaller. It was tiny. It was horrible and incomplete. He couldn't go back to what his life was without him. A shell of what it was now. Every day was a lie and he could never be himself with anyone. He was an actor in his own life in a role he hated, for a script that beat him down day after day. He was alone.

He shouldn't have said what he said. He shouldn't have done a lot of the things that he had lately. He walked through school feeling scared to death most of the time. Afraid that someone would see through his façade and everyone would know who he really was. Afraid what that would mean. He would lose a lot of friends. If Jeremy had a tough time of it, how would they treat one of their own? Like a traitor. Someone who they trusted who had actually been lying to them for years.

For the first time in his life he would be excluded, bullied and despised. He knew in his heart that it wasn't right. He shouldn't want people who would respond that way in his life, but they were the only people he knew. Mystic Falls wasn't huge. He had one community filled with the same group of people he had known since childhood. To lose everyone would be to lose large parts of himself. Good memories would be tainted. Friendships would fall away. That wasn't even factoring in the potential ramifications it would have on his sports career.

Jeremy didn't get that. When he came out his friends accepted him. His family made a point to let him know that they loved him and nothing had changed. His identity put him in ugly positions with some of his classmates, but he didn't lose his core feeling of belonging. His friends stuck by him. His family loved him all the more. Tyler's mother would probably disown him. He was happy Jeremy had the support system that he did, but Tyler wouldn't have that. He would lose everything.

What was worth that?

He sank into his desk chair and grabbed the bottle of tequila by his computer, pouring the alcohol into a shot glass and spilling it over the sides messily. He threw it back and swallowed, setting the glass back down and filling it again. He stared at his laptop and pinched the bridge of his nose.

Biting his thumbnail, he looked at the shot in front of him and closed his eyes. All of those things were true, but he was having a hard time thinking of a single thing that would hurt more to lose than Jeremy. The walls moved closer, threatening to crush him, stealing the air in the room and filling his lungs with the thick pain of poisonous empty space. Tyler's chest heaved trying to fill the ache in his heart, but each breath pained him more.

His father had a violent temper when he was angry. He smacked Tyler around when he couldn't find another outlet. When he died, it hurt. But realizing that he was gone…his grief mixed in with relief. His mother cared for herself more than anyone else. She cared for the Lockwood name and preserving its weight in Mystic Falls. None of his friends really knew him. His popularity was a lie based on fear that he perpetuated because, despite its vapid worthlessness, it was all he had. Jeremy was the only person in his life who he truly believed ever loved him. He could have treasured that. But he chose the lie.

Tyler got to his feet incensed, knocking his chair backward and grabbing the neck of the tequila bottle. He yelled with incoherent fury and threw it across the room. It slammed into the wall and exploded, shattering with a piercing smash and shooting glass in a flood of alcohol. Grabbing the shot, he launched it at the door and watched it break and shower over the floor in a sharp mess of glass and tequila.

He whipped around and covered his face in his hands struggling to breathe. He wished the walls would move in on him faster and entomb him safely away from the rest of the world. He looked down at his desk and stared at the picture on his laptop screen. It was the group shot from outside Six Flags. Caroline emailed it to him. He looked at the image of himself, head dipped toward Jeremy and remembered what it felt like that day to be freely open with him.

His heart filled with an unbearable blackness that spread inside him like a disease, eating away at him until he was consumed by its erosive bleakness. He spent his whole life running from who he was and desperately concealing that person from the world. He was tired. Choking back a sob, he reached for the desktop and ran his fingertips over it, tracing Jeremy's outline.

His fingers slid through his hair as he stumbled to the window and looked out over the shadowy land. He had no where left to run.

Jeremy wasn't allowing himself to think. He drove around blaring The Smiths until he was down on gas and had to drive to Alaric's apartment. As soon as he parked the Jeep, he put his large headphones on and jacked up the volume on his ipod until the music drowned out everything else. He didn't want to think about Tyler, though even deafening music was having a hard time masking the thought of him. He didn't want to think about what was happening between them.

All he knew was that being insulted like that in front of those girls to protect the secret of his sexuality was too much. He couldn't and shouldn't have to live like that. The fact that not living like that meant that he would also be living without Tyler was so powerfully painful that he was in a state of willful denial. If he didn't think about it, it wasn't happening, it wouldn't hit him, and he would be safe from the onslaught of grief waiting to attack him.

As he let himself into the apartment he did a double take at the living room that it opened into. Caroline was sitting on the couch with Stefan pointing at something on her laptop. Jeremy didn't expect to see Stefan any time soon. In fact, he distinctly remembered Damon saying they wouldn't come back until they killed all the bad vamps of Meadows. He hoped seeing him was good news.

Pulling his headphones off, he had to lower the volume on his ipod because the music still blared loudly around his shoulders.

"Hey." He got their attention. "What are you doing here?"

Stefan looked up from the screen and raised his eyebrows. "Oh. We haven't found them yet." He read the anticipation on Jeremy's face and quickly shut it down. Jeremy frowned. "Damon is still scouring the city, but Joel Brennan could still be in Mystic Falls if he's assigned to keeping an eye on us. We decided it would be best to split up and double our efforts. Elena's going to help us pull up city maps of Meadows and try to get into the city's sewer maps. They couldn't have vanished and they spent too long building their power in Meadows to pick up and leave. We'll find them."

Jeremy exhaled deeply, falling down into the armchair adjacent to them. "Whatever."

Elena wasn't in the room, and Jeremy doubted Caroline knew how to do any of the things they needed to so he wasn't surprised when Stefan sighed at her disapprovingly.

"Caroline, we're here to work." He scolded.

She looked around irritably. "Elena's taking forever in the shower. What do you want me to do? Sit here and stare at my nails? Besides, Facebook never hurt anyone before."

Jeremy scrolled through the songs on his ipod, muttering sarcastically. "Tell that to Eduardo Saverin."

"Who?" Caroline clicked around on her page.

"Co-founder of Facebook." Jeremy answered dully.

"Oh. Isn't he like crazy rich?" Caroline smiled as though she would love to spend some quality time with someone on top of that kind of fortune. Stefan eyed her dubiously.

Jeremy closed his eyes and pulled his headphones back on. Death Cab for Cutie sang about the sound of settling, but Jeremy's mind wandered to Tyler in the woods. He was overcome with such sudden heartache that he turned away and covered his face self-consciously. He didn't want the other two to notice what he was feeling. The idea of not being with Tyler filled him with an incredible amount of pain. He felt like someone had their hand inside his chest and was pushing against his heart's effort to beat. The fact that it beat anyway made it all the more painful.

Caroline squealed so loudly from the couch, the shrill noise cut through his loud headphones and startled him. Jeremy pushed the headphones down to his shoulders quickly.

"What?" He stared at her as she looked enthusiastically at the laptop screen. "You find them on Google Earth or something?"

"Jeremy!" She shrieked happily and his brow automatically furrowed at her excitement. "When did you guys go public?"

Jeremy made a face at her not understanding. He set his ipod down and got up, going over and sitting next to her to peer at the screen. At first he didn't know what he was looking at. It just looked like Tyler's Facebook page. Then his eyes caught on the basic info square and all the blood rushed from his face.

Relationship Status: In a Relationship with Jeremy Gilbert.

Interested In: Men

Caroline clapped with girly zest. "I'm so happy for you guys! And that is the cutest picture!"

Jeremy's eyes flicked to his profile picture stunned. It was a shot of them from a couple of months ago. They were on the trolley a town over on a weekend trip they took with Jenna and Elena. Tyler had his arm around Jeremy who was smiling against his cheek after just kissing it.

"What is he doing?" Jeremy whispered airily. The floor was pulled out from under him and he was left suspended in a confusing, surreal abyss.

He grabbed the computer from Caroline and clicked on his pictures. There was an album full of pictures of them together and group shots where they were holding hands or touching. He scrolled through the thumbnails, heart pounding. Several little squares of them kissing or hugging dotted the album. Tyler had over six hundred friends on Facebook, and now every single one of them had access to those pictures.

He went back to his wall, and his eyes fell on the status crawl under his profile picture:

Tyler loves Jeremy and he's sorry.

A moment ago Jeremy felt drained, and now he felt like someone stabbed a shot of adrenaline into his heart. Pushing the laptop back onto Caroline's lap he got to his feet and ran for the door. Stefan called after him, but he slammed the door behind him on his way out.

Tyler was laying on his back on his bed. He felt sick to his stomach and it had nothing to do with the alcohol he consumed earlier. If anything could sober him up it was his actions in the last hour. He took a steadying breath and tried to settle his nerves, but his body felt like an ocean of adrenaline. He was nervous and jumpy so when he heard a noise at the window he automatically sat up, pressing his back against the headboard. He stared at the spot suspiciously and a moment later, a hand came through the square glass door that he had swung slightly open to catch the breeze.

He didn't move, staring at the spot too shocked to react. Jeremy's head appeared as he climbed higher up the trellis, and a mountain of relief washed over Tyler. He wasn't sure what he would do if it was someone more sinister since his first reaction was to freeze and wait. Jeremy pulled the expensively crafted door to the window open all the way and pulled himself up, climbing over the windowsill.

Tyler got out of bed and stood beside it uncertainly. Before he could gather his thoughts, Jeremy was throwing his arms up across the room.

"What are you doing?" He was breathing deeply from the climb up and maybe from a little running beforehand.

Tyler shook his head tentatively not understanding.

Jeremy pointed to the laptop on his desk. "Take it down."

Tyler glanced over at the computer where his newly updated Facebook page was still sitting on the screen. Comprehension dawned on him and he braced himself.

"No." He said quietly.

Jeremy shook his head in adamant protest, reiterating passionately. "Don't do this. Not because of me. It's our last semester-they'll ruin your life. I don't want that on my conscious, Ty."

Tyler bit the inside of his cheek. Jeremy might not have fully grasped the reasons that held him back from coming out, but it took the threat of losing Jeremy for Tyler to understand that it couldn't wait anymore. He walked determinedly over to him and grabbed his face firmly, tangling his fingers in his hair.

He looked him squarely in the eye. "You are the most important person in the world to me. I'm tired of hiding that. I love you." His heart raced in his chest and Jeremy stared back at him silently. Tyler smiled. "Who cares if I get the shit beat out of me a few times?"

Jeremy wasn't taking the gesture lightly, and his face remained grave. "Try every day for the rest of the year."

Tyler swallowed. He was probably right, but it felt like a distant threat. The one making his chest feel like it was caving in on itself was standing right in front of him. Losing Jeremy felt much more dangerous than the reactions of their classmates to his coming out.

"And what about your mom?" Jeremy reasoned, his obstinate stare moving away from Tyler as his hands left his face.

"I would never friend her on Facebook." He tried to lighten the mood unsuccessfully. His mom wasn't actually in town. She left to visit her sister and obtain something for the next Founder's Day party that his aunt took with her when she moved to Arlington. He would deal with her when he had to. "Everything else…I can take it." Tyler paused and studied Jeremy's face despairingly as his eyes went over the wall, disconnected and filled with dread. "If you're with me."

Jeremy met his eyes and deep weariness softened his features. "Tyler, are you sure?"

Tyler ran his hands down Jeremy's shoulders and arms. "It was time." He said with all the conviction he could muster. He shrugged. "Besides…your 'Married to Vicki Donovan' status was really pissing me off."

Jeremy's severity finally gave way to a smile, and he reached up cupping Tyler's face in his hands and pressing a kiss against his lips. When he pulled back his eyes were blotted with tears. Tyler rubbed his thumbs over his lashes and kissed his forehead, wrapping his arms around him and pulling him close.

Tyler supposed he should be feeling changed and liberated after the bold step forward. As he stood in his room holding Jeremy, though, all he felt was intense, profound relief. Thirty minutes ago he didn't know how he was going to make it through the night. Time was a fickle, healing thing. It might be pushing him toward a reality he wasn't entirely sure he was prepared to face, but the moment it locked him in now was exactly the reprieve he needed to keep himself charged. He might lose everything and everyone who shaped his life and built it into what it was, but he pushed that from his mind. He held Jeremy tighter and steadied his breath. Turned out there was one thing that was worth it.