A/N: Sorry I took so long, everyone. But stay patient, here's another chapter.

Erik: Hopeful Soul - Chapter Twenty-five

The months dragged on, very lonely and quiet for Christine. Sure, the occasional kick of the child within her made her stir and smile, but Erik wasn't a place in sight during the action.

He spent most of his time in the music room, trying to forget the ever-so obvious mistake he had made. Erik knew he should have suppressed himself; that he should have stayed away from her beauty to not cause an accident so life-changing. But when one so pushed away from such contact has the opportunity for it, it was almost idiotic of him not to take the opportunity even though he shamed himself deeply.

Erik wrote softly on the staff, finding himself crying now for no apparent reason - even though he knew why he did cry. He read something as Christine started getting bigger that the child inside at this stage would start to move. It was official that this being was alive and felt terrible for not overcoming his fears and just becoming a good father.

Erik hated to admit, but he always wanted a child ever since he saw the group of boys outside the opera house one day. They were of very young ages and their innocence and pure hearts intrigued him. He shook out the thoughts, though. Knowing it would be cruel to punish a child with his façade because of the shunning from society the child would receive.

He stood, quietly clasping the folder together. From a distance, he saw Christine laying on the sofa with her hand on her lower abdomen as she weakly smiled at the swell. Erik felt like a terrible person - especially for not being there as much as she'd have hoped.

He quietly strode to the sofa, watching as she shifted a bit where she was. Her gaze made him feel uneasy as she looked to him with tears starting to form at the corners of her eyes, "Have you come to tell me more of our so-called burden of a child?" she asked with a slight rasp.

"No," Erik sat at the edge of the sofa, replacing her feet on his lap, "I came to apologize to you. What I've been doing isn't right and the only this...this child will ever know kindness is if his parents are the ones to show it. I know I've been anything but kind and I want to make it up."

"Erik, I thought you said children were filthy. That they are nothing more than harsh burdens."

"I'll tell you the truth, Christine," Erik scooted closer, which made her sit in his lap - back against the arm, "I have always wanted a child. Ever since I was eighteen I have wanted to know the joys of parenthood. I cherish pure heart and innocence of children so much. How they are free of bias and will absorb anyone's words. I just adore that. And I am deeply sorry for not accepting this child. Especially a child made with the woman I love beyond all reason. Can you find it in your heart to forgive me?"

Christine gently rested her hand on his chest, feeling his gently pumping heart, "I forgive you for ignoring me. But I can never forgive you for discarding our child," she removed her hand and rested her head there instead, breathing evenly, "I find adorable how much you say you want a child."

"I do, though," Erik said gently stroking through her hair, "You believe me when I say so, don't you?"

"I do. But with how many times you've-" Christine sighed, lifting her head away from his chest as she felt a strong kick - then pressing on the area it came from.

Erik stared at her hand, wishing for some reason that he could be allowed to touch the swell. He bit his lip, then returned to her eyes as she weakly smiled at him, "Do you want to feel?"

Erik smiled, nodding. Christine took his hand and put it over the spot where the baby kicked the most. The child seemed to know who was there, as a gentle rhythm of kicks tapped Erik's hand. He grinned, kissing her belly, "Does it hurt you?"

"It tickles a bit, but no."

Erik rubbed there as the baby slowed down, the kicking fading away. He let go, taking a moment to look into Christine's eyes as she went deep in her mind, "What are you thinking of, mon ange?"

"The very thing you dread," he was curious, but he realized her reluctancy to say anything more, "I think I could use some rest. After all, the child will come in just two weeks."

Erik watched her ease towards their bedroom, holding the wall for support, "Would you like me to hold you, Christine?"

She said nothing, so he stood, went to her and heaved her into his arms. It reminded him of the very first time he did this. The first time he was ever close to a woman. As he gently laid her in bed, he rid of his shoes, trousers and shirt, then laid beside her.

Christine seemed to ease into him, her head a small weight upon his chest. He brought the blankets up to their shoulders, gently stroking her head now. Christine sighed, wrapping her small arms around his torso. He almost forgot how to be loved he avoided her so much. And he missed it quite a bit. He missed the warm feeling in his chest whenever she snuggled him and now knew he would have to be better to her and the child - as much as his mind told him not to.