He presses the phone to his ear when she doesn't reply and he looks at the receiver and presses it back again, "Vic."
"I'm here." She says. "I've always been here."
He hangs his head, his elbow presses into his knee, "I think I've known that." His fingers scratch his head, "I wasn't respectful of it."
They aren't prepared for their truth. The leaks and drips of it, the flood of it, the depth of it so they pretend it doesn't exist for them and they make up the words of the act they are playing. In the morning they mimic their parts and they spontaneously decide to tell Ruby together only after they realize they need her to help with the paperwork.
He swallows the look of disappointment and she averts her eyes from the judgement. When Ruby walks out of the office she closes the door behind her without being asked.
"That was fun." She says.
He tries to play it off with a smirk but it is one more reminder of where he is and who he is with as he stares out of his window into the populated street below.
"What time are you meeting Cady?"
"Um." He hesitates and pulls his pants up, "11:30." He turns and smirks again as if his pretentious smile will make it all go away.
"So, I'll see you in the morning?"
"Yeah, 6:30 on the dot." His lips curl and she takes the non-verbal clue.
"Coverage is confirmed for the weekend. I'm going to take off early so I can get ready."
"Ok."
"Do you need me to pick up anything for you?"
He pauses for a moment like he's really thinking about it, "I'm good. Thanks."
She spins on her heels and walks out without another word. She can't explain the lack of emotion or the depth of clarity suddenly upon her as she walks down the sidewalk, straight into city hall, up the stairs to human resources, and asks to speak to a retirement counselor.
"I need to know the rules. If I leave employment with the county before I retire she asks."
After an hour with Bessie she is well versed in the terms of vestment and retirement options. Before she leaves she asks about FMLA and disability options. Bessie walks her over to Ruth who fills her head with more terms; short term vs long term disability, baby bonding time, paternal rights and on and on. With her hand written notes and official Absaroka county folder full of official leaflets and brochures she heads home and packs for her trip home.
She googles if wine is safe to drink while pregnant and after reading completely arbitrary articles and testimonials of how normal adults are with mothers who drank before they knew it was dangerous she decides she's already not rational by googling it in the first place. She makes a hot cup of chamomile tea and reserves a room at the closest Marriott near Moretti headquarters for the hell she anticipates encountering.
He waits for her on the sidewalk. He rubs his palms together but it's not cold outside and he catches himself. She looks taller as she walks toward him. Her smile is partially manufactured. He thinks he taught her that when he wasn't looking and he returns a genuine smile because he really is happy to see her.
"Hey Punk." His lips are still curled upward and his eyes are bright.
"Hi Dad." Her smile lights up as she leans in and kisses his cheek.
He tells her just after their food is delivered and while she waits for Dorothy to bring back a side of Ranch dressing for her fries.
"Wow." She says and pulls her hair back behind her ears. "Um." Her eyes grow larger, "Wow, I'm not sure what to say." The manufactured smile reappears and his heart sinks a little.
He pushes his food forward just a tad as his hands dangle next to his plate. He should have been more prepared but he didn't plan for this reaction just the other obvious ones.
"Congratulations." She says still wearing her disguise.
Dorothy puts the side of dressing on the table without a word.
"Cady." He looks toward the front door and back at her, "Um, things are still up in the air."
Her countenance shifts, "What do you mean?"
"Nothings settled."
She leans forward and turns prosecutor as she whispers, "Is she going to have the baby?"
"I think so, yes."
"You think so?"
"She won't name him after me if it's a boy." He says.
"Ok." She pulls her hair back again. "What does that mean, dad?"
He looks at her not formulating an answer and she swallows before speaking.
"Do you love her?" Her eyes wince when he meets them.
"I love her."
"She loves you back?"
He nods his head still looking at her feeling completely uncomfortable having this conversation with his daughter.
"What's the problem then?" She asks folding her fingers together.
"Everything."
"They never would have found you, you know, without her." She smiles and it's soft and it's genuine. "I guess I've known since then." She says. "She was relentless."
His face relaxes, "She told me you saw the surveillance footage."
Her eyes widen, "Ah yeah. That was awkward."
His eyebrows rise and he takes a deep breath, "We're going to Philadelphia tomorrow to tell her family."
"Dad." She says and exhales for them both.
"I keep wanting to apologize but I'm not sorry, Cady."
"Does she know that?"
He looks down at his food and wonders when his daughter got so smart. "Your fries are getting cold."
Before he goes home he calls her.
"I know we don't have time for dinner."
She cuts him off, "How did it go?"
"We have an entire plane ride to talk about it tomorrow." He says.
"That bad." She pulls her hair back.
He turns and faces his bookcase, "I want to kiss you goodnight."
Her voice lightens, "I would like that."
He fills the doorway and his arms fold around her as their lips meet. She kisses him like she means it and he kisses her because he does. On the plane ride he tells her about his conversation with Cady and he tells her he's not sorry and he leans over and kisses her and she tells him she's not sorry either. As the plane starts to descend she tells him about the hotel room and his ears pin back. He hasn't felt this nauseous since boot camp.