In the days that followed Jax never left my side. We had a small ceremony for Emilia before getting her tiny body cremated. Now my child sat in a jar of ashes in our cupboard as I refused to have it sitting anywhere I could see it. I didn't need the constant reminder. I already had that thanks to the painful full leaking breasts that came with having a baby. My body hadn't been told that there was no baby to feed. I took the meds the doctors gave me and shoved cabbage leaves down my bra until, after a couple of weeks later, my boobs were back to normal. Jax found us a new place to live that was our own. A cute two bed split level on a quiet street with a small backyard for Abel. It felt so good to have our own little place again, away from Gemma's constant watch. I knew she was just looking out for me, but I just didn't want the attention. I was better off dealing with all of it on my own. I kept my thoughts to myself, plastered a smile on my face and got on with whatever needed doing. I returned back to work and finished the final 2 weeks of the semester before the Summer holidays. Now I had 2 months of doing absolutely nothing. After a few weeks in our new place, we had a garden party for Abels first birthday. Gemma had planned most of it, and turned up early to set everything out. I was sitting having coffee still in my pj pants and singlet when she let herself in.

"late night sweetheart?" she asked eyeing my attire.

"You have your grandson to blame for that" I replied. "guess he was excited" I drank my coffee.

"Where's Jax?"

I nodded to the back door. "Setting up some play swing thing" I replied lighting a cigarette and blowing out the smoke. "Juice is helping"

Gemma sat down at the table opposite me. "Are you ok with all of this, today" she asked.

I shrugged. "Life goes on right"

Gemma raised her eyebrow.

"I'm ok" I sighed. "yeah part of me wants to just run and hide, but I can't. Its Abel's day. It's not about me" I finished my smoke and stubbed it out in the ash tray. "I better get dressed"

By 11am our small backyard was crammed with Sons and their old ladies. A few of them had their kids too who were happily playing on all the new toys. Abel was off with Gemma getting cleaned up after his cake smash. I stood to the side drinking my beer and watched quietly. My Dad came over.

"hey" he said clinking his bottle on mine. "How you doing"

"Peachy" I replied looking at him.

"Yeah you look like the life of the party" he said sarcastically.

"Bite me" came my reply.

He drank his beer looking around the yard. "This can't be easy" he commented.

I just shrugged. "I'm fine"

"You look like shit"

"You know you don't get to come in here, after being MIA for months, and try and play parent" I growled.

"I know I've struggled with Opies death, and I haven't been here for you" Piney explained. "But I'm still your father"

"You are nothing to me" I spat out, my voice turning a few heads. "you made your choice, to go and sulk and forget anyone else existed. Including your own daughter." I pushed him, not caring that my old man lived on oxygen that filtered through tubes into his nose. "so don't you dare come back here and try to play that card. I hate you" I screamed the last words at him, pushing him right over, before Chibs took hold of me and pulled me away.

"Oi, not the time Charlie girl" he said as all the guests stared at me. Jax walked towards me his face serious.

"What's going on?" he asked.

"Nothing" I muttered shrugging Chibs' arm off me.

"Can you have your family drama some other time?" Asked Jax.

"He's not my family" I replied angrily.

Jax blue eyes were cold when the landed on mine. "This is my son's birthday; can you please just try to be nice"

"Oh I forgot, he's Samcro." I replied. "No matter what he does, he still shits rainbows to you" I pushed passed Jax and headed back inside.

"She's a walking time bomb" Chibs commented.

"yeah I know" Jax replied.

Gemma looked up from where she was feeding Abel in the kitchen as I stormed past. Clay and Bobby were also there talking. They all stopped when they saw me. I ignored them and grabbed my bag.

"heading out sweet heart?" Gemma asked.

"yeah I gotta do some stuff" I replied grabbing my car keys. I kissed Abel on his head and went out the front to my car, taking off before Jax made it to the driveway.

I drove to Lodi, to the bar I used to work at. Adele and Carrie were working so I took a seat at the side of the bar.

"It's so good to see you" Adele commented putting a glass of bourbon in front of me.

I sat and chatted and drunk at the bar with them until closing.

When it was time to go I hesitated. I didn't really want to go back to Jax. I did feel bad for causing a scene at Abel's birthday, but in my defence someone could have warned me that Piney was back. I sighed and started my car, heading back to Charming. I had passed the welcome sign when a police cruiser flashed his lights from behind me. I pulled the car over and wound down the window.

Deputy Hale appeared beside my car.

"Hey Charlotte" he greeted as I handed him my license and registration.

"Hale" came my reply.

"You been drinking?" he asked.

"Yep"

"Explains the extremely bad driving I've been witness to for the past 2 miles".

"Cut me a break Hale." I begged. "It's been a shit day"

He looked at me for a while. "I know you've had it rough lately, but I can't ignore this" he opened the door. "I gotta take you in"

I'm not entirely sure why I pulled the gun out of my bag and aimed it at Hale, but at the time it seemed like the logical thing to do. Hale took a step back, his hand on his own weapon.

"You don't want to be doing this" he said slowly. "Put the gun down"

"I've had a really bad day" I said to him. "I really would like to just be left alone"

"I can't do that" Hale said. "Don't make this any worse then what it is"

"But I'll lose my job" I said tears falling down my cheeks.

"If give me the gun, I will forget you even pulled it on me" Hale said. "It's your best option"

I looked at my hands that were shaking as they held the gun. Slowly I handed it over to Hale and got out of the car. I let him handcuff me and followed him back to his cruiser where he put me in the back seat. The drive to Charming Police Station seemed like it took forever. As Hale led me in I passed Chief Unser who frowned when he saw me in handcuffs. I knew that as soon as I was out of sight he would be calling Jax.

"I don't want to see Jax" I said to Hale when he led me into a holding cell.

"If he's hurt you" Hale replied.

"No" I exclaimed. "it's nothing like that. Just keep him away please"

Hale shut the cell door and locked it. "I'll do my best" he said before leaving me alone.