*After reading the reviews/opinions I added more to this chapter and will skip ahead in the next chapter.*
CHAPTER 25 - The List of Detestables
Lily awoke very early the next with the largest headache she had ever experienced. Yesterday seemed to be one giant blur and if it weren't for the body cuddled up with her on the couch she might have thought it was all a dream. She remembered leaving the apparation building with Peter, having both passed. After that things kind of smeared together. She remembered Peter leaving her for a short time with Terrence. He stayed very professional during the experience, gently helping Lily as best he could. She was never injured, at least not physically. When Amelia appeared is when she really lost her cool. She let herself sob into her friend's shoulder for over an hour, both just standing there. She barely remembered returning home and if she had gotten a full explanation of what happened from an auror she had no recollection of it. Now there was a part of her that wanted to understand more.
The house was quiet and empty now. The summer had been her and her parents with Petunia showing up occasionally with Vernon. She tried very hard to rub him in her face, shining her diamond ring every chance she could. She missed the fact that Lily did not care, the only part that bothered her about their marriage was that she would have even less of a chance of making up with her older sister than before. Her heart sank as she realized Petunia had not been informed of their parents' death. If she had then it would have been some kind of muggle explanation and she should know the truth.
Lily groaned loudly and tried to repress her tears. Her beautiful mother and gentle father were gone for good. The body beside her shifted uncomfortably and let a low moan, stretching and shifting position. Lily looked at her friend Amelia. It was hard for Lily to completely open up to people, she was instinctively more reserved. Amelia had naturally seemed to understand how Lily worked and they fit right in to each other's lives.
Amelia blinked her eyes a few times, fighting the urge to go back to sleep. She began tying her messy brown hair back into a pony tail. The two just looked at each other for a little while, assessing the other. Amelia leaned forward and wrapped her arms around Lily, giving her a hug.
"I-I have to tell Petunia," Lily sniffled.
"You don't. I made sure an auror went over there and spoke with Petunia. I told him she knows about our world," Amelia said soothingly.
There was her way out. She could just leave it as it was, or send her sister a letter instead of having to face her. It was her fault their parents were dead. She wouldn't be a coward and take the easy way out. She needed to face her sister no matter how much she screamed at her. She had to be mourning just as much as Lily right now.
"I do. She's my sister. I need to at least try," Lily choked out.
"Alright, just-"Amelia was cut off by pounding on the door.
Amelia turned her body on the couch toward the entry way of the Evans' household. A frown formed as the pounding continued. Lily began patting around her eyes to make sure any tears were wiped away. Amelia stood before Lily had the chance and strode to the door. If it was Petunia there to yell at Lily she would have to get past Amelia first. Amelia flung open the door ready for a shouting match. She let her arms hang at her sides and her brows raise as she looked at the person standing in front of her.
He glanced at her for less than a second and pushed past her. Amelia didn't stop him although she did not like Severus Snape it was possible he would know the right thing to say. Lily was standing just a couple footsteps from the couch, her eyes slightly red. Snape grabbed her wrist and pulled her along to the back door. The door opened magically and then shut once Lily had disappeared through it. Amelia placed her ear against the door to listen, her wand at her side, ready to intervene if necessary.
"What are you doing here?" Lily snapped, yanking her wrist away.
"Lily. It was all in the Prophet, there's a picture of you," Severus tried to explain gently.
"I don't need sympathy," Lily replied quietly, averting her eyes.
He very suddenly pulled her into a tight hug, practically enveloping her in his long trench like coat. She didn't even fight it, she allowed herself to return the hug and cry into his shoulder.
"They're gone Sev. Gone,"
"I read the article but there's more than that. I've been trying to tell you for awhile now. You need to know," Snape sucked in a deep breath loving being the shoulder for Lily.
Would she hate him after what he had to say? Would she refuse to ever speak with him again? He let himself change his mind so many times and upon reading the Daily Prophet his mind became set in stone. He kept her in the hugging position, never wanting to let go.
"Lily you've got to listen to me. I think it might have to do with what happened yesterday. Marcus Malfoy had a list that he and some other Slytherins created. It wasn't much at first and then it grew and became more serious. Then-" Snape paused, "Then I saw it. You were on the list Lily. They made a list of . . . muggle borns and some blood traitors."
Lily didn't move but she had stopped crying and her body was considerably tense, "What are you saying Sev?"
"They called it The List of Detestables. I was afraid they might attack you but what happened was worse. The list was passed on, to He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named," Severus squeezed her closer at the sound of his old nickname.
"This list? You think they were after me yesterday?"
"Yes and no. They didn't want just you. There were plenty of muggle borns there and a political opponent," He wanted to look into her eyes but was to ashamed.
"There were other witches and wizards there as well! What about them?" Lily pulled away, looking at her old friend.
"Lily, there wasn't a single pure blood or half blood, besides Bagnold, killed," He looked at his friend, wishing for the first time that he was never a Slytherin.
"Who gave it to Him? Who gave the list to Him?" Lily choked out angrily.
"I-I don't know," Severus lied.
Avery had in fact given the list to his friend Lucius Malfoy, who had recently joined the Death Eaters. Lucius used the list to gain favor and in turn put a target on the backs of the muggle born students at Hogwarts. He couldn't tell Lily it was Avery for three reasons; she would want revenge, she would draw more attention to herself by knowing therefore causing trouble for the both of them, and Avery had been one the first Slytherin's to actually treat Severus with respect. In some twisted way, he wanted to protect Avery.
Lily put her arms around him again and cried into his shoulder, "It's all my fault. They're dead because of me."
Severus patted her on the back, selfishly hoping this would bring her closer to him again. They could hide their friendship at school. He shook the thoughts from his mind; Lily would never go for that. She was forever lost to him. He held her tighter in hopes that he could remember this feeling for the rest of his life. He hadn't noticed the distant popping sounds, or the footsteps, or the back door opening but he did hear someone clear their throat loudly.
Sirius and James woke up early to meet Remus and Peter outside and work on their project. The motorcycle looked perfect and ready to go but there were still a few kinks to work out. They discovered yesterday that it flew and flew well; it just didn't turn or brake. They had quite the time trying to get Sirius and the motorcycle safely back on the ground. Sirius was looking like a child on Christmas morning with a pile of gifts. He rubbed his hands together as Remus was just walking up the drive, having apparated nearby and footing it the rest of the way.
Sirius wasted no time hopping on the motorcycle and shooting into the air. James rolled his eyes and laughed at his best friend, only able to take the bike backward and forward in a straight line. He tried leaning to make the motorcycle turn but nearly fell off. Remus jogged to reach James and pulled out his wand.
"He'll be fine Moony," James chuckled.
"Padfoot, come down! We've got to try and fix it," Remus hollered.
"I can't, remember?" Sirius let the bike run out of juice and slow to a near stop in midair.
Remus waved his wand and lowered both Sirius and the motorcycle to the ground. Sirius hopped off the bike with a large grin.
"Once this gets going, it'll be bloody brilliant," Sirius said, "Oi! Where's Wormtail?"
"Haven't heard from him since yesterday before the apparation test," Remus shrugged, "He said he'd be here today."
"The bugger's late. He probably didn't pass and doesn't want to tell us," Sirius laughed.
"Or couldn't get here," James joined in.
While that was something Peter would do the boys had not yet realized that was not the case. Peter's mother was currently reading the Daily Prophet and questioning him relentlessly about the events. He wanted to get to the other Marauders and fill them in.
Mrs. Potter stepped outside with a solemn face. She approached the laughing boys for whom she was making breakfast. Instead, she read the Daily Prophet, learning about the horrendous attack. She knew something was wrong when her husband sent her a quick letter telling her he wouldn't make it home until tomorrow afternoon. She read through the names of those killed and gasped, rushing outside.
"James! James! I just got the Daily Prophet. There was an attack yesterday, on Diagon Alley at the apparation building," She said shaking as her son and friends sprinted to her side.
"That's where Lily and Wormtail were," Remus breathed.
"They're ok; they aren't listed as one of those who were murdered. Isn't this the girl you've been owling?" Mrs. Potter handed the Prophet to James, pointing to one of the four pictures.
It was a picture of Rufus Scrimgeour standing in front of the ruin. Behind him was a red headed girl, her face dirty and tear stained. A volunteer assistant Healer had a comforting arm around her and his face turned from the photograph. Lily's picture would stare forward blankly with her piercing eyes as if she knew you were looking at her and then let her head fall and her shoulders shake. James stared at the photo while Sirius and Remus looked on silently.
"Looks like Lily's experienced Wormtail's bad luck a few times now," Sirius said straight faced but trying to joke.
"There he is now!" Mrs. Potter said with relief, "Oh Peter, I'm so glad you're alright."
Peter was running as fast as his legs would allow. He stopped in front of them, panting and trying to catch his breath. He didn't have time, however, because the three boys tackled him in one big brotherly hug.
James shoved Peter back a little, "You should've owled us or something!"
Peter smiled at his friends, "If I had the chance."
"So you passed your apparation test then?" Sirius smirked.
"I sure did. Lily too," Peter went quiet after mentioning her, his smile disappearing.
"Wormtail, what happened? How is Lily?" James asked nervously.
Peter could only look at James without a reply. After a few moments James turned to Sirius and Remus with an unexplainable look on his face. It was a mixture of many different emotions.
"We're going to Lily's house," James stated.
"You don't know where she lives Prongs," Remus pointed out.
"I do. I went with Amelia to take her home. We should be able to apparate right outside the house," Peter said puffing out his chest, importantly.
"Be back for dinner James. Your father will be home," Mrs. Potter said sorrowfully.
James nodded at her, pushing the frenzied feelings away. He began speed walking down the drive with Sirius, Remus and Peter in tow. This war, if one could call it that, was affecting everyone in so many ways. James wondered how it might affect Lily. He had always observed her to be strong and brave; he couldn't imagine how she, or anyone else, might deal with loss.
"You've all forgotten a very important detail. Lily lives in a muggle neighborhood and its broad daylight. We can't just appear out of thin air in her front yard," Remus added.
"Side apparation. Lily's front door, Wormtail," James said casually, causing Peter's eyes to bulge.
He made it outside the perimeter of his house before the others. Remus and Peter were practically jogging and Sirius was striding coolly after them. The three never ceased to amuse him. James motioned them to hurry and held a hand out, inviting Peter over before placing a hand on his shoulder.
"I-I don't kn-know about this Prongs," Peter said nervously.
"Nonsense. You passed, you're legal. Let's go," James grinned, the confidence he had in his friend was enough to boost Peters.
Peter nodded, waited for the others to grab a hold of him and then closed his eyes. He remembered what Lily had told him before they took the test. He kept his mind focused on the exact place he wanted to go. He felt the uncomfortable lurch and then opened his eyes. Sirius smiled and clapped a hand to Peter's back.
"I think you've got a real talent," Sirius started to compliment, "for keeping your mind completely empty."
"You're welcome Padfoot," Peter said sarcastically, though he hid the smile.
Without even bothering to knock James opened the front door of the Evans' household and strolled through the entryway and living area. He spotted Lily's friend Amelia, who only glanced for a moment in their direction, standing by the back door with her ear pressed against the crevice between the frame and the door. Without a word James opened the door as Amelia backed away from it. She had a very amused but also concerned expression on her face.
James could only guess why she was spying on Lily. He could immediately eliminate that Lily was talking to a good friend. He slipped outside quietly, leaving the door open for the rest of the marauders and Amelia to join them. He was not entirely shocked to see Severus Snape in Lily's backyard. What he was surprised about was that they had their arms wrapped around each other in a hug. The jealousy James felt disappeared as he realized what she had just said to Snape, her eyes full of tears.
"It's all my fault. They're dead because of me."
He knew better than to lash out but he felt a great amount of irritation with Severus at that moment. From where James was standing it looked like Snivellus was taking advantage of the situation. He cleared his throat loudly to announce his-their presence.
"What are you doing here, Potter?" Snape spat out, letting Lily pull away and bring her hands to her face.
"He said it's called the 'List of Detestables.' As if what happened in Diagon Alley wasn't bad enough," Lily said glumly, though she had gained much more composure.
"So just being clear; You-Know-Who wanted Junior Minister Bagnold dead and saw the apparation building as an opportunity to cross a few extra off that wretched list as well," Remus stated.
The four boys sat around the Evans' kitchen table looking at Lily and Amelia. The two girls were standing closely together as if physically sharing strength through some invisible aura. Lily's eyes were dry now, unable to shed even the smallest of tears anymore. Amelia would cast a quick and pitying glance in her direction every so often when she thought Lily wasn't looking.
Severus Snape had taken his leave only minutes after the marauders arrived. He looked very unusual surrounded by the normally raucous group of boys, the tension was thick. He spent all of those final minutes glaring at the four teenagers, especially James Potter. The feelings James had for Lily had been voiced clearly through their fifth year. This was his main reason for hating the boy, despite the constant tormenting James and Sirius imposed upon him, like almost getting him killed, and their astronomical talent that they loved to flaunt. As much as he disliked the idea of leaving them with her, he could not stand another minute in their wretched presence.
"It's not your fault Lily," James said after a long silence.
Lily look up into the seventeen year old's hazel eyes gratefully. He said it with such surety that even she, for the most part, was convinced. There would always be a small part of her that would wonder how things would have been if she had never been a witch.
"I wish there was something we could do," Amelia said, subconsciously stomping her foot, "It's not right. I'd like to point my wand at the lot of them."
"I chose a Healer. I should've gone for Auror," Lily said flatly.
James stood up from his seat and walked over to Lily and placed a hand on her shoulder, Amelia taking his seat in return, "You'd be brilliant at both but you chose to pursue becoming a Healer for a reason. Just because you won't be an Auror doesn't mean there isn't something you can do to help."
"It only makes sense," Remus interjected, "There aren't enough Aurors to fight off You-Know-Who and his Death Eaters. They'll need others and I'm willing to bet once we get out of Hogwarts we'll find a way to be a part of that."
(A/N: So this one isnt all that interesting but I hope you like it anyway. If you have any thoughts or ideas about things you think may be good to add let me know. Right now I just feel like I'm running out of juice on this story. Could just be because I've been to incredibly busy. I have lots of plans and I will bring in McGonagall which is not canon because she shoudl have been already teaching but lets just say I needed an extra character or two. You'll see why.)
Brightaay: First review again! you rock! This chapter is kind of a downer as well. I know from now on things need to be a little different for Lily but I dont want to make her depressed or anything so that might be hard for me to express in writing.
EchoNightFall22: I love hearing from new readers! I'm glad you like it so far and I hope you continue to read and review. Thank you so much!
Deep142: The love potion thing hadnt crossed my mind but its a good idea. Maybe I will have to use it at some point! Lol. I just want to keep Terrence in the readers minds because he will show up again much later in my story.
iloveredshoes: I wasnt planning on having her talk to Petunia and Vernon but since you mentioned it it only makes sense. So I supposed I will have to. Obviously Petunia meets James at some point and learns about a few things like dementors.
nightangel: Thank you SO MUCH!! Really though I loved your review. I'm so glad you like my story. it really boosts my confidence and desire to continue! I hope you like this chapter!
colie21: I have to fight back the urge to just make James always come to Lily's aid. I'm trying to be slow about it but sometimes its hard. James can be arrogant sure, but he is such a good guy underneath that immaturity.
Sarahrules336: I actually debated on that. To have Lily date Terrence. She went on a date with him but it never really progressed even though he wanted it to. Sometimes its all about your actions and Lily didnt seem as interested as he wanted. Don't worry. He comes back into the story in the future to cause some trouble.
READERS, PLEASE REVIEW!!! :-)