FINALLY! Hi everyone! Please don't hate me for keeping you all waiting for so long. Laziness and serious writers block have attacked me, but I promise to try to write more.

This chapter is kind of short but I have big plans for next chapter and it seemed like I just really needed to end this one here to get into the new stuff. Thanks for reading! Love you all!

Lena's POV

My mouth hangs open.

I can hear my heartbeat in my head, but I swear it stopped.

Embry is a wolf.

Embry is a wolf, and though I have seen him like this before, I have never seen him this close. In fact, I don't think many people have seen one of them in wolf form this close. I was never allowed. "It's dangerous," is what everyone has always told me.

But he is a wolf.

And the thing is, I'm not sure how long he was becoming one before I realized it.

Surely, Embry and I have always been uncontrollable together, reckless even, but I had only realized once he bit me and started shaking that something was wrong. Embry was grasping my waist so tightly that I felt like I couldn't breathe and he was shaking and growling and wasn't himself at all. And suddenly, I froze. Terrified. And I thought, in that instant, that he became someone else, and that maybe, just maybe, if I had asked him to stop, he wouldn't have been able to. And that terrifies me.

He was growling like an animal. An actual animal. And now he is one. Right in front of me. And I have no idea how I am supposed to take this.

His werewolf form is still shaking, his eyes locked on me, and fear surges through my veins all at once.

What if now that he is a werewolf he lost his control?

What if he still comes after me?

What if he can't help himself?

I grasp the comforter tightly in my fist and hesitantly push myself off of the bed. The ends of the comforter skim my legs as I begin taking steps backward, towards the bathroom door.

Even Embry himself has talked about how dangerous the wolves can be when caught in the right moment, the right intensity. Is this that moment?

The wolf- no, Embry- no, wolf-Embry, takes a step forward. I hear myself gasp, though I swear I don't breathe. I feel my back press up against the wood door and press myself tightly to it. I'm afraid. No- I am terrified. I am terrified that if I turn my back to open the door, that he will attack me. I've never been this close to the wolves before, and I've seen what they're capable of. I've seen Aunt Emily's face.

And then… he's Embry again.

I barely even notice that he is naked because I immediately close my eyes, a sense of relief so heavy washing over me that it actually pushes me to the ground. I slide down the door and onto the ground, dropping my forehead onto my knees and holding myself tightly together. I'm trying to breathe the right way again, but I just can't. I am being ridiculous, I realize this; it's Embry, he would never hurt me, I know, but I can't help myself.

I squeeze my eyes tightly together and will myself not to cry. What is wrong with me?

"Lena." I feel Embry's fingers brush my elbow and I gasp away. I sit up straight, and then when I see his face, completely heartbroken at my reaction, I cover my eyes with my hand, because how the hell did this happen? One minute we were about to finally be together in the way that I have wanted to for so, so long, and the next I am terrified of him and pulling away in fear when he touches me.

"Shit, Embry," I moan and cover my eyes with my hands. "I'm sorry," I suck in a quick intake of breath.

"What?" Embry breathes. He touches my hair this time and I don't flinch away now.

"Why are you sorry? I- I, fuck, Lena. I don't know what happened. I- I am so sorry."

"It's," I gasp in another quick breath. "Fine. Embry," I struggle. "It's not your fault I-,"

"Of course it's my fault," Embry is almost whining. "God, Lena. I could have killed you."

I finally let out a few of the tears that I have been holding back.

"Shit, Lena," Embry pulls on my arm. "Don't cry. Please don't cry. I would never hurt you."

"I know that," I moan. "I'm sorry. I'm so sorry Embry I shouldn't be-," I break off to press my hand to my heart. I can feel how quickly it is beating even above the blanket.

"Stop apologizing!" He growls.

I fold in on myself. "P-please don't- don't-," I struggle to find the right words.

"I'm not going to shift again," He states. His voice sounds sad.

"I'm sorry," I whimper.

"Stop. I'm serious." He timidly pulls me into his arms and then gently rests his hands around my waist. "Do you want me to call someone? Are- are you okay Lennie?"

"Wh-what?" I sniffle. "I- I'm fine, Embry. I- I'm sorry, okay? I'm so sorry," And suddenly I am crying again.

"Lena," Embry's voice sounds pained. "Why are you apologizing?

"I'm fine," I cry.

"Than why are you crying?" Embry asks gently.

"I- I don't know," I gulp loudly. "I- I just think it scared me. I'm sorry," I moan.

"Would you stop saying you're sorry? God, Lena. You have absolutely nothing to apologize for. Did I hurt you?"

I shake my head.

"Did I just scare you?"

"I- I think so," I finally cling onto his arm and drop my forehead into his elbow. "I'm so sorry, Embry. I'm fine."

"Apologize one more time."

"Sorry," I giggle.

He hugs me tightly to him. "Stop it."

I sniffle and nod my head.

"Let me see your neck," He says suddenly, his voice soft but stern at the same time. I freeze, terror leaving me and a different kind of panic taking over. Now I really hate myself; he is never going to touch me ever again.

I pull the comforter tighter around me. "No."

"Lena."

"Embry," I shoot back. "You're going to make this so much worse. Just stop."

He remains silent now.

After a moment he can't help himself. "Are you hurting?" He asks gently.

I gulp and shake my head, though the truth is that I sort of am. My neck aches where he bit me. My torso burns from the imprint of his fingers and the bruises that I am sure he left. He sucked too roughly on my collarbone and the skin there feels raw. I cling on tighter to him.

"Do you want me to call someone?"

"What are you talking about?"

"Are you, like, scared of me, Lena? I could get someone over here."

"Shut up, Embry."

"You seemed really scared, Lennie," Embry whines.

"I was. But you're back."

"I can't believe that happened," Embry whispers almost to himself. "I can't believe that happened," He repeats once again. "How the fuck did that happen?"

"Is that- like," I clear my throat. "Is that what… like- is that what happens when we…"

Embry's entire body tenses. "What?" He asks slowly.

"I mean," My voice quivers. "Is that like what happens because you're a werewolf. When we have sex will you turn into…"

"No."

"Okay," I wheeze.

"Lena," Embry grabs my shoulders and roughly pulls me up so that I am eye-to-eye with him. "No."

I gulp and nod my head.

"You thought that, that was normal? That you'd have to have sex with an animal?" His voice sounds heavily of disbelief.

Heat rises on my cheeks. "No!"

"Lena."

"Well- I don't know," I finally get out. "We've never talked about it before."

"Fuck," Embry closes his eyes and shakes his head.

"Embry," I reach out to touch his cheek. His eyes spring open.

"It's okay. It was an accident, right?"

He nods his head.

"Does that, like, happen every time?" I am not able to hold my terror back like I intend to.

"No," Embry moans. His eyes become glassy as he leans into me. "Lena, I've never heard of this ever happening before. I'm not sure what happened, but it's me, not the werewolf."

"Oh." The fear that I had felt before, about this possibly being something that could happen again or that I should expect to happen all the time leaves my system in an instant, and all I can think about is Embry. I can't imagine how much he is beating himself up right now.

"I'm sure it'll be fine," I quickly cut in. "I'm sure it's just because you haven't been with a girl in a long time."

Embry grits his teeth. "So hadn't Jacob, or Quil, or even Paul… but this didn't happen. Fuck!"

I cringe and pull back just a little bit.

Embry's eyes soften instantly. "You're scared of me."

"No I," I sigh and drop my forehead against his shoulder, cuddling into his chest as he hesitantly wraps his arms around my back. Now that I know that what happened really was some sort of freak accident and not a natural occurrence that would explain why my parents were always so ridiculously loud, I just want him to hold me. I want to be reassured that we didn't just take 700 jumps back and we're still just as solid as we were before. I want him to promise me that he's not going to walk away again.

"I think you are," He sighs and rubs my back.

"Can we just take a bath and cuddle?" I kiss his neck gently.

"Lena," Embry breathes. "What the fuck is wrong with you?" But his voice is not cutting or angry. "Aren't you scared?"

"Of you? What the fuck is wrong with you for thinking that?"

"Fine," He sighs. "But only because then I'll be able to see how much damage I've done."

He stands and I cling tightly to him. "No!" I suddenly panic. "I take it back!"

Embry ignores me. He sets me on the counter and then starts the water. Just now I realize that he is only in boxers. I pull the comforter tighter overtop of my body as Embry leans against the side of the tub, staring at me.

I gnaw on the inside of my cheek, nervous. I can see Embry using this to walk away, but in the same sense, he is taking a bath with me. That should say something, right? I still can't help my mind from wandering.

Embry walks over to me slowly, his eyes examining every inch of me. He finally reaches me then takes my cheeks delicately into his palms and kisses me softly. I sigh into the kiss, and that is when I feel his fingers pulling on the comforter.

"Embry," I break from him and press it tightly against me.

"I'm undressing you," The corners of his lips timidly pull up. "I thought you'd like this."

"Of course I like it," I press my lips together. "But I know what you're going to say once you do."

Embry's expression falls. "I hurt you, didn't I?"

I gulp. "It was an accident, Embry."

"I could have killed you." I realize that he already said this once before.

"Would you stop?" I narrow my eyes at him. "People have rough sex all the time. It's not that big of a deal."

"Lena. You were crying in the fetal position on the floor. You thought that you were expected to have sex with an animal. How is that okay?"

I feel heat rise on my cheeks due to embarrassment. "I was just confused."

"I completely lost control. But I didn't just lose control, I could have killed you. Dead, Lena. If you think I'm ever going to touch you again, you're crazy."

My mouth drops. "Embry," I gasp. "H- how could you say that?"

"What do you mean how could I say that? Look at yourself." Embry suddenly pulls the comforter off of me in one swift motion, uncovering my bare chest all the way from my neck to my abdomen. I pull the cover back up quickly, but not quickly enough not to notice the way that his eyes widened as they skimmed across my body. The fear behind them, or is it… disgust?

Tears spring to the corners of my eyes as I pop off of the counter and rush into his bedroom.

Embry is behind me in an instant. "Lena," He begins.

"What Embry?" I cry as I reach for my clothes to dress again.

"I- I'm sorry. Don't go, okay? I just- I can't believe that I did that. I mean, look at you."

I wince. "I don't need to. This is exactly what you wanted, isn't it?"
His eyes widen. "What?" He breathes.

"You needed something like this to happen to give you an excuse to leave and you finally got it so here it is. It's fine. I'll go so you don't have to."

"Lena," Embry's voice is soft. "That's not what's going on at all."

"You don't even know what's going on because you never even asked me. You just assumed that I'm terrified of you and then decided you can never touch me again!"

"What do you mean?" Embry's voice is soft again, gentler now.

"I'm not scared of you, okay? I was freaked out because I thought as an animal you wouldn't have any control and you'd try to have sex with me even if I didn't want to, okay?"

Embry's eyes widen.

I moan and drop my face into my hands. "Stop it."

I feel Embry's hands rub against my shoulders and then he kisses my forehead. "I'm not laughing at you, Lena," Embry's voice is dripping with honesty. "I just feel awful that you thought that. That you thought I would hurt you… like that."

I sigh and peer up at him. "Not you," I reach for his hands that are placed on my cheeks and hold onto them. "The wolf you. I've never been allowed to be around any of the wolves. I didn't know. It just scared me."

He kisses my cheek and wraps his arms tightly around me. "Don't go," He breathes into my neck. "I'm not going anywhere, so please don't go."

I press my lips together to keep from crying and rest my forehead against his shoulder. "Embry?" I ask, my voice cracking.

"What, Lena?" Embry kisses my shoulder.

"I need- I need," My voice cracks and I suck in a breath.

"It's okay," I hear him whisper. "Tell me."

I swallow. "I need to know that I can tell you how I'm feeling without you leaving me." And once the confession is out, it feels like I can finally breathe again, because the thing is, he did scare me. And I'm still a little freaked out, but I am trying so desperately to cover that up because I am afraid that he will take it and run with it.

"Okay," He kisses the side of my head and pulls me closer. "Okay."

I cry softly into his shoulder for a while before I feel his hot breath in my ear. Even in my current state, I still shiver.

"Let's go take a bath."

I bite my lip and then take a deep breath. "Really?" I ask.

"Yes. But first, can I take care of your neck? I think you're bleeding."

I nod sadly and then pull away. Embry has a sad expression on his face once he leans me up against the counter and I remove my shirt. His fingers are more than gentle as they timidly slide underneath my bra-strap and skim it down my shoulder. He tilts my neck to the side and then cringes when he becomes face-to-face with his work.

"It's not that bad," I tell him softly.

"Does it hurt?" He asks in concentration as he gently touches the skin surrounding it.

"No."

His eyes shift to mine for a moment, as if he doesn't believe me, and then shift back. He leans down to get some supplies out of the cabinets and I finally allow myself a quick peak in the mirror behind me. I squint my eyes. And then I squint harder. Finally, I turn completely around to face myself and then nearly laugh in relief.

I take a deep breath as I inspect the bite mark on my neck that definitely contains indentations of teeth, but only drew a small amount of now dried, dark red blood. There aren't any bruises present on my sides, either. In fact, the only serious marks left on my body are the line of thick deep red turning to black hickeys on my collarbone.

"Embry," I turn to him and smile.

He raises his eyebrows at me.

"You barely even hurt me!"

He closes his eyes. "Do you hear what you just said?"

I roll my eyes. "I'm pretty sure many girls look worse after rough sex, Embry. I think you're being a little dramatic."

He moans and opens his eyes. "Shut up, Lena."

I giggle and hop on top of the counter. "You know what actually is gross, though?" I trail my finger along the scar on my lower abdomen. "Ew," I frown.

Embry's fingers brush against my bullet scar and then my cheek. "It's not gross, Lena. Nothing about you is gross."

I wrap my arms around his neck. "I'm not even hurt, Embry."

He brushes his fingers against my shoulder to look at my neck once more. "I bit you, Lena."

"I know. But I swear I didn't even feel it at the time. Actually, it felt really good."

He sighs. "And now?"

"Now it kind of hurts a little," I whisper. "But I swear at the time I wasn't scared of you. It was only after, when you shifted. Then I got freaked out."

Embry nods slowly. "And these?" He gently touches his fingers to my collarbone.

I bite the corner of my lip. "No, Embry. Those didn't hurt. I can promise you that."

The corners of Embry's lips pull up. It's not a smile, but at least it's close.

"Those are just hickeys, you know," I grin at him.

Embry finally appears to break from his trance that accidentally hurting me brought on. "Yeah, I do. How do you? Hm?"

I giggle and peck him quickly. "Bath?"

He sighs. "You still want to?"

"Definitely."

"Okay." He unclasps my bra and lets it drop to the floor. I gulp up at him, but in an instant he lifts me over to the nearly overflowing bath and turns the faucet off. In only my underwear, he goes to rest me inside of the bath, only, I really, really want him in there with me. I clasp my arms tightly around his neck and pull him down with me. Suddenly he loses his footing, and we both fall into the bath at the same time. The addition of both of our bodies sends water gushing out of all sides of the tub, drowning the floor.

"Oh, shit," Embry laughs, his expression caught between worried and surprised as he surveys the damage.

I laugh, too, and then suddenly, we're both laughing. Embry shakes his head, sighs, and then climbs overtop of me. He holds himself up on both sides of the tub and then keeps his face idle, right above mine. I wrap my arms around his neck and kiss his jaw once.

"You really are beautiful, you know that?"

I peer up at him, unable to help my eyes from going right to his, because when he speaks to me like this, with honesty and so much sweetness, I have no other choice.

"Really," He says once I don't answer, and then skims his lips across my cheek.

I can't tell if it's the heat from the bath or his words that bring a blush to my cheeks.

"Are you going to talk to Sam?" I ask carefully.

"I'm going to talk to someone," He kisses me softly. I press my hands to the back of his neck to keep him close.

"I wish you wouldn't."

"Lena," Embry's voice is more serious now. "I have to. I can't risk killing you again. I'm still shocked that I'm saying again."

"I'm just too sexy. You can't contain yourself," I tease.

"Ha, ha, ha," Embry drops his face into my neck. "Yeah you're sexy as hell, Lena," Embry says, his voice deeper. I bite my lip. "Dangerously sexy. Believe me now?"

I giggle. "Yes. I am terrible. How dare I."

"How dare you is right."

"So who specifically are you going to talk to?" I ask again.

"I don't know, Lena," Embry places a piece of hair behind my ear. "Is there someone specific that you would like me to talk to?"

"No. Just not Mr. Black. They're my parent's best friends. It's weird. And embarrassing. And… weird. And preferably not Jared either," I cringe at the mere thought.

"Babe," Embry places another piece of stray hair behind my ear. "It's nothing for you to be embarrassed about. I'm the one who freaked out. If anyone should be embarrassed it should be me."

I shrug.

"Hey," He nudges my shoulder. "Like you said; all you did was be sexy as hell. I was the one who couldn't handle it."

I giggle, and Embry must like this, because he sits down opposite of me and then pulls me towards him. I press my breasts right into his chest and actually feel his muscles tense. I rest my cheek on his chest and smile to myself, though I don't push it this time. I'm not really jumping at the chance to maybe get mauled by a wolf again, tonight at least.

I moan when it finally hits me.

"What?" Embry asks.

"Nothing," I moan again. "You just finally figured out the only thing that would keep me from having sex with you. Probable death."

"Way too soon," Embry states blandly.

I smile and peer up at him. "Love you."

His breath that he was taking stops halfway on the inhale and then he immediately looks down at me, his mouth slightly parted and shock evident on his face.

I roll my eyes. "Don't expect me to say it again. Or often, either."

Suddenly, Embry smiles. And it's not like he just smiles, I mean, he lights up the entire room like a little boy on Christmas morning. He clasps his hands around my cheeks and pulls me up to him. I laugh against his lips and then give him my cheek.

"I love you," He kisses my cheek. "I love you. I love you. I love you." He attacks my face with kisses and I laugh hysterically as I half-heartedly push him away from me.

"Okay, okay!" I giggle. "Enough!"

Embry laughs and finally pulls away. He strokes the side of my hair. "Just say it one more time."

"Embry!"

"Just one more time!" He smiles that big, little boy smile that makes me want to smother him in a hug.

"No!" I blush.

"Oh come on, Lennie! You're probably not going to say it again for like another year."

"Hey!"

He laughs and rubs my shoulder. "Just once more," He asks sweetly. "The full thing."

"Embry," I sigh.

"Please?"

I sigh once more and then lean in towards him so that our lips are nearly touching. It's different now, more nerve-wracking, embarrassing almost. When I have to feel it and say it and it's expected, it's different than just blurting it out playfully. I connect my eyes with his fucking beautiful hazel ones and smile just a little bit.

"I love you," I say gently, and the words barely sound like I am saying them. But I sound more like myself than ever.

"I love you too," He holds my face softly in his hands.

And then he kisses me.

And I melt like the girl that I never said I would be. But I most certainly am.

I actually PROMISE this time to update sooner. Thank you to everyone who hounded me- makes me write faster!