Author's Note: I wasn't sure if this chapter needed a warning or not. But I am pretty sure it's okay. If it offends anyone I apologize. Thanks as always for all your lovely reviews! I'm beginning to think that by the end I may actually have my goal of 500 reviews!

Special Thanks to my awesome beta SceneNeko!

~Chapter Twenty-Five~

"You what?" Dimetri muttered, hand clenching so tightly to his phone it throbbed. "Repeat that?"

Kurt took in a shaky breath. "It wasn't even a real kiss. He did it so I would stop freaking out."

Dimetri paced around his bedroom. Eyes darting back and forth as he tried to focus his attention on Kurt's voice. But all he could see in his head was Blaine, and Blaine was laughing at him. Everyone was always laughing at him.

His boyfriend fumbled on, his words coming out rushed and frantic. "It was a stupid dream, Dimetri! It has nothing to do with anything."

"You kissed him." He forced out, hands starting to tremble. The confession really shouldn't have surprised him. After all, how many times did he assume the two of them were doing just that, behind closed doors?

"In my dream!" Kurt cried, "He kissed me. He kissed me I didn't reciprocate, I promise!"

Dimetri's back hit the wall and he lowered himself onto the floor, legs not wanting to hold him anymore. It was like he couldn't catch his breath.

"Let me just… start over?" came the plea.

He nodded but then grimaced when he realized his boyfriend couldn't see him through the phone. "Go." He rasped out, rocking back and forth in an attempt to calm himself.

"I went to Blaine's room because I didn't want to be alone. We watched some movies and fell asleep, I was dreaming that Blaine was singing to me and confessing his love and he kissed me, so I kissed him back. Then I woke up but I was really kissing Blaine, we were both asleep."

Dimetri wrapped his hand over his eyes and banged his head back against the wall.

"Say something…" Kurt implored. "Please... or else I am going to get in my car and drive over there."

"Wouldn't you rather go to Blaine?" he spat out, the very name leaving a sour taste in his mouth. "Apparently he can give you something I can't."

"No!" The other boy immediately shot back. "I told you! It was a mistake and I'm sorry. It didn't mean anything."

"Then why are you even telling me?" Dimetri demanded, "Because you want to make me feel worse than I already do?"

"No!" He whimpered. "I told you because-"

"Because if you really want Blaine you just have to tell me!"

"I don't want Blaine I want you!"

"Well then maybe you should have thought about that before you went and kissed him!" He spat, hanging up the phone and throwing it across the room. It made a satisfying crash as it hit the wall and fell behind his bed.

The phone rang but Dimetri ignored it. He didn't want to talk to Kurt anymore. He buried his face into his shaking hands. He hated everything so much.

No matter how hard he tried, he couldn't force the images of his nightmare from the night before out of his head. It wasn't abnormal to have nightmares at home. Especially not of the night he lost his best friend. But this time… this time it was different.

It began the way it always did, with Dimetri running up the polished marble stairs. For every step he took, another two steps would appear. With blood pulsing in his veins, he fought the urge to stop. He knew what waited for him.

When he finally made it to the top of the stairs, the hallway to Fitzy's room hid the doorway in murky darkness. His brain begged him not to go any further, but he never listened. He had to force legs to take each step, as they were as heavy as lead.

Reaching the door, he turned the knob. The scene played through unbearably slow. Eventually the door swung open to reveal his best friend's bedroom, unchanged with time and events. Fitzy stood by the solitary window, his left side hidden from Dimetri.

The sound of sobbing startled Dimetri into motion. But it wasn't Fitzy he heard crying. His heart leapt up into his throat as he recognized Kurt. His precious and vibrant Kurt curled up in the corner of the room.

Opening his mouth to speak, Dimetri found he couldn't, nor could he get his legs to move any closer to either of the room's occupants.

Fear gripped him so tightly in his chest that he couldn't breathe as he heard a low, familiar chuckle.

"When are you going to tire of this game, Dimes?"

Dimetri shook his head. Not understanding what game his friend talked about. "…Kurt…" he finally managed to stutter out.

His best friend made to turn towards him but Dimetri already knew that the left side of his face would be mangled, but it didn't stop the cry of shock from escaping his lips. He'd seen that face so many times. The damage was so severe that it forced his parents to have a closed casket.

The disfigured teenager chuckled again.

Dimetri shook his head violently, "What did you do to him?"

"Nothing…" Fitzy smiled, but it looked nothing like it should have. "What did you do to him?"

"What?"

"You couldn't save me… what makes you think you can save him?"

The words made his widened eyes snap back to the cowering figure in the corner.

Walking around him, towards Kurt, Fitzy kept talking. "It's interesting, isn't it? How much being tormented every day changes you. And then…" he laughed again. "At home where you are supposed to be safe it only gets worse."

He swallowed a lump in his throat. "I didn't know…"

"Are you still claiming ignorance?" Fitzy snapped, turning one smoldering eye on him. "You knew! You knew every day! You saw with your own two eyes, you just didn't care."

"I did care!" Dimetri angrily fought with the force keeping him from running to Kurt's side. "I always cared! You never told me how bad it was!"

"I shouldn't have had to." Fitzy lowered his voice as he crouched down next to Kurt. "And now, you're incompetence is affecting someone else. I can't let that happen."

His throat felt dry and he couldn't swallow. "What do you mean?"

It was then, that Fitzy pulled out his father's hand gun, the same one he'd used to take his own life. His face softened as he turned Kurt's face up towards him. "You don't have to hurt anymore."

"Stop it! Get away from him!" Dimetri shouted, for some reason his voice went hoarse. At least he had one; sometimes he couldn't speak at all.

Kurt blinked red and weary eyes up at Fitzy, clearly not seeing the gaping hole in his face. "I don't?" he whispered.

"Kurt! Don't look at him!" Dimetri kept shouting, but as hard as he tried he couldn't make himself move. It was like he was watching the scene, not a part of it. "Fitzy please!"

Fitzy ignored his pleas. He took the gun and closed Kurt's fingers around it. "No. You can make it all go away."

Hot and angry tears built in his eyes as he let out a strangled cry. "Stop it! Kurt!" But neither of them heard him. It was like he was screaming from inside a soundproof box.

Kurt kept his watery gaze on Fitzy who continued to coax him. When he pressed the barrel of the gun under his chin, Dimetri lost it.

He screamed, just screamed, banging on the invisible barrier around him with his fists. This couldn't be happening. Not again.

Fitzy met Dimetri's eyes as the shot rang out through the room. At that instant, Dimetri woke up, drenched in sweat and with tears pouring down his cheeks. He wanted to call Kurt so badly. Just to hear his voice. But he figured it wouldn't go over well being the middle of the night.

So, he resigned himself to turning on all the lights in his suite and turning on the TV. He got no more sleep that night.

Now here he sat, alone in his room, crying over the fact that his boyfriend kissed Blaine. He really wished Kurt had kept that information to himself. He didn't want to know. He didn't want to think about it. He also didn't want to be stuck in his current prison.

Ever since childhood, Blaine loved Christmas. He loved everything about it. The chilly weather, the smell of pine, the houses all decorated with lights. Of course the specials on TV, cookies, caroling, even shopping when done early enough in the day. But this year, he couldn't help but approach the holiday with a heavy heart. This would be his first without his Grandfather.

His family didn't go to church, but they did have their own customs and special ways to celebrate the festivities. Even his father would participate, granted the bare minimum but the effort never went unnoticed.

As it turned out, the Anderson home would be lacking in company, as most of the family wanted to be as far from Ohio this year as they could. Then add on the fact that his parents were arguing constantly, and the only distraction Blaine caused was for a different topic to fight about. His home was anything but welcoming this year.

He locked himself in his room with a roll of wrapping paper, adorned with little penguins and blue snowflakes. He turned on his favorite Manheim Steamroller album and got to work wrapping his presents.

His mind started to wander, and lately it always wandered to Kurt. Sadly, Kurt decided to leave for home a day early and missed Dalton's Holiday Social. Blaine had been looking forward to spending some quality time with the brunette, with Dimetri being gone. But as luck would have it, he didn't even have the chance to say good bye.

Blaine made a number of calls to his friend, some answered, some not. He couldn't shake the feeling that something was wrong with his friend. They hadn't really talked any more about what happened in his dorm room. And if history repeated itself, Kurt would attempt to ignore it. But Blaine wasn't about to let it go that easily. Kurt responded to his kiss, Kurt dreamt about kissing him, Kurt had feelings for him. With that confirmation, Blaine decided to stop playing around. He needed to win Kurt, and he needed to do it now.

He almost missed his phone ring, but thankfully it vibrated in his pocket. The name on the ID made him smile. "Hey Kurt." He greeted, not bothering to hide his pleasure in the call.

"I told him." Kurt blurted but then didn't wait for Blaine to say anything. "I told him about the kiss and now he hates me."

Blaine blinked, pursing his lips together. "You didn't break up over it did you?" He couldn't help the little quiver of hope that appeared in his stomach. That would be far too easy.

"I don't know!" He cried. "He hung up on me and won't answer the phone. What do I do now?"

Closing his eyes, Blaine flopped back on his back. "I'm sure he doesn't hate you, Kurt. It's impossible to hate you."

"Ohhhh…no it's not. Lots of people hate me." The statement was not sarcastic, but honest. "I should have waited to tell him, I mean he's all stressed out from being home and he sounds terrible. Oh god… why am I such a failure?"

"You are not a failure." He told him with a sigh. Sitting back up he attempted to clear his thoughts. "You just… want to be completely honest. There's nothing wrong with that. I'm sure once Dimetri calms down he will call you back."

Kurt whimpered.

Rubbing his head, Blaine mumbled. "I don't understand why he's mad at you. Didn't you tell him I was the one that kissed you?"

"I told him all of it." His best friend moaned, really miserable now. "What if he doesn't get over it? What if he hates me now and doesn't want anything to do with me? I cheated on him."

"Well…" he drawled, licking his lips. It was now or never right? "If it doesn't work out with Dimetri… you could give me another shot?" Kurt's silence accentuated with each beat of Blaine's heart. "You know I care about you."

"Oh god…" the brunette moaned again. "Are you seriously doing this to me? Right now? I'm sitting on my bed in sweatpants, Finn's McKinley t-shirt with messy hair and splotchy skin."

Blaine had to smile. "I think you always look beautiful."

Kurt made a feeble noise on the other end of the phone.

That made his heart skip a beat. Was Kurt actually considering what he just said? "Kurt?"

Then all he got was some shuffling.

"Kurt?" He repeated again, frowning. "Are you still there?"

Finally his friend let out a groan. "I can't believe this is happening. Isn't this exactly what Dimetri was worried about? Oh… Blaine likes you, Blaine is trying to steal you from me, Blaine is deliberately sabotaging us."

"Kurt-"

"No. Blaine I'm sorry. There are several things that are becoming clear to me now. You don't want me; you just don't want me with someone else. Because it's easier to just keep me at arm's length and have me there when you need me."

Kurt's words shot a shard of cold right through Blaine's chest. "Kurt…"

"And the worst part is I don't think you even realize what this is."

"That's not what this is." Blaine argued. "I know I was a dumbass before. But what I am feeling now is real!"

"How do I know what you think is real right now is really real? How do I know that as soon as I choose you that you won't suddenly decide that you only care about me as a friend?"

"Well how do you know Dimetri isn't going to get pissed off again and dump you?"

Kurt exhaled loudly. "The only reason he dumped me was because of you, the only reason we fight is because of you. You, you, you!" That certainly wasn't an expected response. Kurt never spoke cruelly, sure some of his remarks had a bite, but he was never cruel.

Fighting to keep his temper under control, Blaine took a deep breath. Arguing with Kurt right now wasn't going to help either of them. "I think we better cut this conversation off before we say even more things we don't mean." He caught the mistake too late.

"So you admit it then!"

"No! Kurt." Blaine raked a hand through his curls. "That didn't come out right, I meant stuff you said… about me."

He could hear Kurt crying on the other end of the phone. "I am so sick of this…" he took in a shaky breath. "I have to go. Just… stay away from me for a while."

"Stay away? Kurt, you're acting insane."

"I know." He cried. "I know. But I don't know what else to do. I don't want to lose him, Blaine. But I don't want to lose you either. Maybe I am just supposed to be alone."

"You don't mean that. You are just upset. Rightfully, so." Blaine couldn't believe how steady his voice sounded, his insides certainly felt frazzled.

Kurt took a moment to calm his breathing. "No. I think I really do mean it. This is all really confusing and it shouldn't be."

Closing his eyes, Blaine swallowed the lump in his throat. Now he felt like a complete ass. Kurt was confused. That's what he thought he wanted. If Kurt was confused about his feelings, it would be easier to steer him away from Dimetri. But now it was steering him completely off course and even farther from Blaine. "What about Dimetri? You can't say you want to be alone and then go running back to him. Don't placate me, Kurt."

"I don't know!" Kurt snapped. "And I'm not placating anyone. I just don't want to deal with this right now."

"Hiding from it isn't going to make it go away; it's only going to make it worse." Blaine didn't know why he was pushing Kurt like this. Well he did know why. It was his boyish pride. If he couldn't have Kurt right now, he didn't want Dimetri to have him either. And that was exactly what Kurt said to him earlier, wasn't it? That shook him to the core.

"I know…" Kurt whispered.

Feeling more and more like a drain on humanity, Blaine swallowed the last bit of resentment. "Alright. You want space; I'll give it to you. But, Kurt? I really don't think that's going to make you happy."

Kurt sniffled. "Thank you…"

"And…" he paused, unsure if he really wanted to say the words. "I hope you will give as much consideration to me, as you give to Dimetri. We've both screwed up and deserve the chance to make it up to you."

"I will." Kurt whispered, "I promise."

Blaine nodded, that was all he could hope for at this point. "Well, call me, if you want. And have a Merry Christmas."

Kurt laughed softly. "You too, Blaine... you too."