I am trying to balance everything, and clearly not succeeding. I will try to get the next one up as soon as possible!

The building looked like some mix between a log cabin and a stone house. The door was ajar, swinging lightly in the wind. Everyone began to crouch, going into "stealth mode." Embry led the way into the house while Emmett held the door, followed by Paul and myself, and then Jacob. The room was mostly clean, aside from bloodied paw prints. And I immediately went to a door broken off it's hinges and down the stairs to the basement in which I had been kept, jumping over the door that had been shredded. I placed my paws on the prints. These were mine.

I felt my stomach lurch, whining as I went around the room. I saw the chains and rope around the room. But the table on it's side is what caught my attention. The floor was darkened as I approached, blood stains. And as I rounded the table I saw part of Alan laying. His body torn apart, only his torso, mostly intact lay before me.

I did this. I killed him. I killed someone. I did it. Blood. So much blood.

In my mind I could see the blood swirling down the drain in my shower. There was so much. It wasn't just mine. I killed Alan.

I stood rigid over the partial body, unable to move, unable to function.

Embry

Ethan? Ethan, what do you mean you killed him? Are you sure?

As we closed our eyes, we all could see the images of when Ethan had been held here, we could smell the blood, almost feel the pain.

I ran to his side, trying to nudge him toward the stairs. I phased back, "Ethan we have to go."

I tried to move him, but his tiger body wouldn't move, wouldn't shift.

Jacob came down in his human form, a grim look on his face. Ethan began to shake. I lifted him in my arms, with Jacob's help, and we removed him from the building.

We took him some yards away and set him down. He was still rigid. His legs were practically locked, I didn't know if I could calm him, if I could reach him. I knelt in front of him, wrapping my arms around his neck, "Ethan."

I repeated his name, nuzzling into his fur, whispering his name. I felt him tremble and then I felt him shifting. He slowly became smaller in my arms, becoming human. I quickly covered him and helped to dress him as I watched his face. Frozen in shock it seemed, his eyes were wide and his mouth was a tight line.

Jacob and Emmett were talking to each other as I clothed Ethan and tried to talk to him. "I don't blame him in the least. Did you see that in your head too? I would've done worse had I been him," Emmett mumbled to Jake.

"He must have blocked it out or something. That was a pretty gruesome sight in there. How are we going to clean this up?"

They continued on for a bit about what to do and how to deal with it, but I could only focus on how silent Ethan was. "Come on, we can deal with this, you know? Wake up. Let's go home. We can make a cake and watch a movie or whatever you want to do, but we have to move Ethan. Please."

I pulled his head into the crook of my neck and kissed the top, holding him. His arms came around me quickly, and in such a firm grip that he startled me. I could feel his tears on my chest, but he didn't make a sound, just shivered every once in a while. Jake and Emmett stayed close enough to hear, but far enough that I couldn't see them, watching out for us.

In barely a whisper, I heard him, "I'm a murderer."

I tried to talk to him but he cut me off, "I killed him Em. I tore him apart. It doesn't matter what he did to me, because I did something atrocious back. And now I am no better than him. Because I shredded him. I deserved it."

I pushed him back slowly, his face solemn. "You think just because you killed him, that you deserved what he did to you? You never deserved what he did. No one did. He deserved far worse than what you gave him. He was a low down, good for nothing, ass that lived to torture. He committed far more crimes than you. He was a sick creature, Ethan. Nothing can change what has transpired with any of it, but he deserved a hell of a lot worse. And I am sure that Emmett would agree whole heartedly. Isn't that right?"

From a short ways off, we heard him holler, "Hell yeah. Shit like him doesn't deserve to breathe. Ask Edward sometime."

"We need to be moving soon," Jake hollered back, "We will take care of things somehow. Let's get home and take some showers."

Paul, who until now had been missing after we entered the house, came from the tree line still in his wolf form. He moved slowly toward us and he nuzzled Ethan with such a tender look in his eyes, that it made my breath catch. I had never seen him so sentimental before. Sure we had seen him be kind with Rachel, but I think he still tries to put on a show when we are all around. But after this, I am positive that she knows a much gentler side of him than us.

We walked in human forms back toward Ethan's home. His hands were clenched so tight in a fist, his knuckles were turning color. I gently touched his left arm, stroked my right hand down to his hand and gently pried it loose, and laced my fingers with his. He cupped my hand in his and took our hands up to his face. He stared at our hands for a moment, looking thoughtful, before lightly touching his mouth to the back of my hand. I wrapped my left hand around his forearm, as if he were escorting me and his right hand came to rest on top of that hand.

We walked the whole way like that, in silence, with only the rustle from the trees in the breeze to make any noise.