Chapter 21: Missing
"Goodness…" Hisao peers into the gaping hole in the side of the police station. There was not even the slightest resemblance of an office space now. What remained was total destruction. Pieces of wood and cement littered the room. Massive craters were present in nearly every single wall. It was as though a typhoon and earthquake had ravaged the building simultaneously. Just what kind of fight had happened here?
Kenji's foot taps a piece of a corpse resting on the asphalt and grimaces. "It looks like we missed one hell of a party."
"You got that right…" Cautiously, Hisao entered into the station. He was met only with silence. Whoever had caused this was long gone.
Out of the corner of his eye Hisao spots a girl lying dormant on the floor, the one with the waist-length red hair from before. Everyone had totally forgotten about her.
"I think she's still alive." Hisao knelt down next to her to check her pulse. "Yeah. Definitely alive."
Kenji follows Hisao into the ruined office, wood and debris cracking under his shoes. "I don't like this. It's quiet. Too quiet."
His suspicion was not baseless, given how destructive the fighting had been. To come this far and not encounter any signs of another person was very strange.
"Maybe they went off elsewhere." Hisao looks around as he lifts the girl off the ground. There wasn't anything to indicate where they would be though. No footprints, no trail of damage. "Well, if we can't find them, we should at least get her out of here."
"Yu…ji…?"
The girl stirs and blinks slowly. The girl's eyes are hazy, barely able to make out anything she's seeing. Her hand reaches upward towards Hisao's face.
"Uh…" Hisao stiffens. "Hey, you're awake?"
"Ah…!" The girl's eyes widen in surprise. She finally realizes that she's being carried in someone else's arms. "Let me go!"
She thrashes around violently, causing both herself and Hisao to fall to the ground.
"Hey!" Hisao shouted and rubbed the back of his head. "That hurt!"
"Shut up, shut up, shut up!" Without any warning a katana was drawn from the girl's cloak. "Don't you dare come any closer!"
"I think we're getting off on the wrong foot here..." Hisao reluctantly puts his hands up in surrender. "I'm not going to hurt you."
Kenji doesn't raise his gun, but his index finger slowly slides over the trigger.
The girl keeps her katana pointed at Hisao though. "Where are we? Who are you?"
Hisao opens his mouth to answer, but before he could, something smashed into the wall next to him like a cannonball, spraying dust and pieces of wood across the room.
"What the hell?!" Hisao coughs and shields his face.
As the dust settles, Hisao barely makes out the silhouette of a person carrying another person by the waist.
…
Chapter 21: Delay the Inevitable (Rivalea Fayanne)
"Ow…" I hurt my shoulder a bit on that impact. Not that I had a choice. I would've been sliced into half if I hadn't changed my trajectory.
"Riv, your exoskeleton is badly damaged. It's only operating at 30% of full power and most functions have been disabled. Any chance you can ditch the kid?"
"Working on it, Isis." I look around for a safe spot to hide Nara.
"Hey, you're…!"As I hear a familiar female voice, I notice the presence of other people here. There's that Flame Haze from before, threatening a boy with her katana.
"Good timing. Catch!" I throw Nara at the boy. He barely catches Nara. "Keep him safe!"
"Wait, what's going on?!" The boy's utterly flabbergasted.
"He's alive. Just knocked out. Hurry and get out of here before-"
"Found you, rat."
A chill runs down my spine. I turn and bring both my arms up to brace for the attack. But it wasn't enough. The twin swords smash my exoskeleton into pieces; an attack as a strong as a missile flings me through the air like a ragdoll.
"Agh…Hah…!" How many walls did I fly through? The pain is so intense…
"Riv! Can you get up?!"
My ears are ringing. My vision's fading out. It's hard to even move my arms…
"Shit…I can't falter here…" I force myself onto one knee. I must be in the main lobby right now. There's a lot of open space in this area. I don't want to be forced to fight here.
"I wonder what will break first. Your will, or your body?" With a heavy clunk of metal armour, the Shadow enters my field of vision. Its twin swords twirl through the air in a deadly dance, poised to end my life.
I focus my mind. A Solar Grenade appears in my right hand. Before the Shadow can make any moves, I hurl the Solar Grenade as hard as I can. It strikes home, and I get only a brief chance to turn my head before the explosion.
There's no describing how bad the heat was. I've never thrown a Solar Grenade that close to me before.
"Ahhhhhhhh!"
I'm flying backwards again, screaming as the intense heat burns my arm. The cold porcelain floor brings me to an abrupt halt. I cough over and over again. I've never felt this much pain in my entire life...
My left arm's charred and blackened. I won't be moving it again anytime soon. I manage to prop myself up against the pillar behind me. But…
"You call that an attack? You're just as worthless as he was." The Shadow wasn't harmed in the slightest. Not even a single burn mark.
I raise my right arm. Void Lightning arcs out of my finger tips and strikes the Shadow. Anything hit by that should be disintegrated immediately.
But to my horror and shock, the Shadow keeps advancing. One step at a time, it comes close to ending my life. The Void Lighting is completely ineffective, as though I was shooting nothing but sparks.
"Shit…" I whisper. I'm frozen in place by fear. If those attacks wouldn't work, what now?
How…? How could I fail here, of all places?
Mother, father…Lukas…I'm so sorry…
My head sags down. Tears stream down my cheeks uncontrollably. Even after dedicating my life to trying to save them, I was nothing but a failure.
The twin swords are swung at my neck. I could do nothing but weep.
"Riv!"
The swords that attacked with blinding speed…were stopped with a single motion. When I look up, Isis is there. One hand grasping each blade, Isis strains against the Shadow, trying to make its weapons useless.
"Isis…" My voice is so choked up I can hardly even speak.
"Now's not the time to give up!" Isis pushes the Shadow back. "I won't let you die here, so fight…Fight!"
"…What a nuisance. Get out of my face!" The Shadow firmly plants one boot into Isis's chest and shoves him back.
Without a moment of hesitation, Isis picks me up and leaps onto the second floor, narrowly avoiding the edge of a blade.
"Riv…Come on. Stay with me." He sets me down against the wall. "You've worked so hard to get here. I'm here with you, so don't lose hope." He looks exhausted already, but trying his best to smile.
Ah…it was like this on the day we met. I was ready to give up and accept my end. But Isis saved me.
"Take this!"
I raised my head higher to see who that was. The Flame Haze charged into the lobby and blasted the Shadow with scorching hot crimson flames.
The Shadow brushed off the flames and charged forward with swords raised. But the Flame Haze was good. Her ferocity and speed matched the Shadows. Surpassing the speed of the Shadow's swords, the Flame Haze scored several clean strikes. But just like with my attacks, there wasn't even the smallest of scratches to show for it.
Gun shots echoed through the lobby as another boy with glasses fired several rounds at the Shadow from cover.
The boy that I threw Nara at leaped at the Shadow with surprising speed. In his hands was the strange katana that Nara was using earlier.
"How will we beat that thing?" I wonder aloud. "Nothing we do can hurt it."
"That thing came from Nara, right? Maybe only he can hurt it…Just a theory of mine." Isis observes the battle, deep in thought.
"Well he's unconscious right now. How do you expect that to work?" I do a quick systems check. None of my weapons are functional either. Plus my sword's not nearly enough for this thing. I'm at the end of my rope.
"…I guess we stall." Isis gets ready to jump back down.
"Wait!" I call out to him. Isis freezes with one foot on the railing.
"What is it?"
"Deactivate your physical form. I don't want you getting put out of commission too."
Isis hesitates momentarily. But then he takes his foot off the railing. "Understood. But if you're in trouble again, I'm coming back out."
I nod. "Thank you." I really don't want Isis to be fighting if I can help it. He once told me that his physical form cannot be recreated if it is ever destroyed.
I look down a bit to hide my embarrassment. Though I might deny it, it's really comforting being actually able to hug him.
I laugh a little bit at how petty that train of thought is. Really…I don't want him to fight because I don't want to see him hurt. Even if he's just an AI, he's all I have left.
I'll be the one to fight.
…
Chapter 21: A Heart of Glass (Nara Hishikawa)
"…ra…Nara…Nara."
I wake up to find Ellie's voice calling my name. My heavy eyelids slowly open.
"Where am I?" My throat is clogged with exhaustion and pain.
"Rivalea brought you back to the Police Station. That thing…it called itself your Shadow. It tried to kill you so Rivalea grabbed you and fled. It would appear that she's engaged in battle with the Shadow. So are Hisao and Shana."
Ah…we're back in that office place that Rivalea and I tore up. Back to square one, huh? They left me on a reclining chair and took off.
"My Shadow…?" I wonder aloud.
I'm very familiar with Shadows. But I've never encountered one that could speak and take the appearance of a person. I pull out my Evoker again. I press it to my head as I have done countless times. "Persona…!" I pull the trigger. Click. Nothing happens.
"This is just an assumption of mine. But perhaps the Shadow is your Persona?"
I consider the possibility. If a Persona is a manifestation of me…that would mean…
"Of course." The realization struck me. "That would be why it said those things. Why it tried to provoke me into rejecting it…"
Aigis once told me that Shadows carry negative human emotions. It's only natural that my Shadow would carry my negative thoughts and feelings.
"But…All those things it said. They're…lies…" I force the words out. I can't accept them.
"Nara, as an AI I have no right to say this to you, but everyone has a darker side to them. Just as you will always have a shadow, your negative emotions will always exist. But does that mean that your other feelings are not real? Does it mean that you do not value your precious friends?"
Ellie…I want to plug my ears.
"Furthermore, you are running away from your own reality. So accept yourself, Nara."
"No…I'm not running away! I'm just…" I clench my Evoker tightly. "I just…!"
"Nara Hishikawa. You are my master, and I've pledged my loyalty and service to you until the ends of time. That is why I am saying this. You must accept your reality. Please."
…Yeah. I knew from the beginning. This was all just to cover my own pain and loneliness. To make me feel like I had strength, when I reality I was nothing.
But my feelings for my friends, they are genuine. I want to protect them. Every memory I've shared with them, every trial we have endured together...I've been happy. When I'm with them, I feel happy, just like I did before. It was as though I truly had a place in their hearts, as they did in mine. I don't want to lose that feeling ever again. I'm so afraid of being alone… afraid of being left behind and forced to go forward on my own...I don't want to be alone again, I've been alone, and I will never…ever go back! Whether this fantasy is real or not…
Those…are my true feelings.
I stand up. "Ellie…you remember what my master taught us last time?"
"Yes. But do you intend to use that here?"
Ellie's already set the waypoint arrows. Is my mind set?
"Yeah…If my Shadow is really me, then I'll just have to keep being myself. If he denies the truth of my emotions…I'll just defeat him with all of my strength."
Ellie remains silent for a moment, as though she wished to tell me to reconsider.
"I think we have just enough stamina left to make it work. But please, be careful."
…
Chapter 21: Pursuing Your True Self (Rivalea Fayanne)
"Hah…Hah…" I wipe the blood off of my face. I reopened a ton of wounds from fighting. The nano-machines are spent and they can't keep healing me.
"It's no good." The Flame Haze holds onto her sword as a crutch. She's on her knees just like me. This is so pathetic. We must look as though we're pleading.
I glance to my side. The boy with glasses was killed so swiftly that no one got a chance to save him. He's just lying there in a pool of blood.
The other boy fared no better. His body lies against one of the pillars, his hand still clutching onto Nara's katana.
We're going to be next…
"Hey." Nara's voice echoes out in the lobby.
The Shadow's attention is averted. I turn around in surprise, as does the Flame Haze.
"Oh, look who woke up. How do you like it? Your pathetic friends…I tore them all up! Gahahahah! So much for being the big hero, huh?! You're so weak, it sickens me…Your very existence is insulting to me!"
For a moment, I see into Nara's left eye. I see unfathomable fury, burning like wildfire. But only for a moment. Without a word, Nara jumps in front of me. Two Chinese-styled short swords appear in his hands. He's insane. There's no way he'd have the strength to fight now. He's just going to die.
"Took you…long enough." A voice, more like a gurgle, called out. It's the other boy, who I thought for sure was dead.
At that moment, the Flame Haze collapses from exhaustion. She's barely conscious. I fall forward as well. I've got nothing left to spare. Not even enough energy to be on my knees.
"Yeah…I'm sorry, Hisao. I'll take over from here. Just rest for now." Nara takes a strange stance. I fail to recognize it. Could it be that he's trying to fight without any combat data from the System? It's practically suicide.
"Hah…Get out of my way. You don't accept me, you'll never accept me!" The Shadow lunges at Nara.
The swords crash together. The impact is so strong I can feel the displacement of air even from where I was.
That's when I saw.
Nara.
His stance was strange. His limbs were fatigued. His strikes were mediocre. His parries barely stopped the Shadow's attacks. Nara's attacks were unskilled, frantic, and desperate. His movements were slow and shaky at first. It was an unbelievable sword style, seemingly devoid of all technique.
Yet…Somehow…Those blows seemed far stronger than anything he had hit me with during our fight.
"Ugh…wh…at…?!" The one being pushed back is the Shadow.
Despite how swift the Shadow's strikes were, Nara's attacks were nothing short of miraculous. The swinging blades suddenly burst into motion, striking with unimaginable ferocity. Nara's hands were barely holding onto the blades. It's no surprise, considering he went from the speed of a turtle to a bullet in a fraction of a second. Even I could tell he was so exhausted that he could collapse at any moment.
"Tch…this is the end…DIE!"
But Nara does not retreat. His swords swing around and move in unsteady elliptical orbitals around his body. The blades move at a speed I couldn't possible follow with my eyes. Without so much as batting an eye, Nara easily stops all six attacks coming his way. It was a six hit combination attack using the twin swords. Five were meant to strike the arms, legs, and chest. The sixth strike was a cross-slash aimed at the target's head. It's more than enough to completely eviscerate Nara. But he withstood the attack. No, more than that, Nara thrusts his sword forward…!
The Shadow was not ready for it. The blade tears into the armour that we couldn't even scratch. A piece of it is sheared off.
"Bastard…!" The shadow kicks Nara back. It disappears in a flash of pale light.
Moments later, it dives down from a portal in the ceiling. With a flash of light, the Shadow pounces on Nara like a lion.
I hear the clang of metal striking metal. Nara's weaving his blades in orbitals again, beating back against the storm of attacks being thrown out by the Shadow.
How is he even standing? Even I could not hope to remain unscathed when faced with such blistering attacks.
"Riv…are you seeing this?" Isis was just as amazed as I was.
Where is his strength coming from?
"You're just a fake!" The Shadow swings its swords with the full weight of its contempt.
"You know nothing!" Nara shouts back for the first time.
"Really, is that what you think?!" Their swords lock together. "You still cling onto your little fantasy! Friends, family, love, you wanted it all, even if it was just an illusion. You're just lying to yourself, pretending everything's alright!" The Shadow pulls back one sword. The blade is swung against Nara's white sword, shattering it into pieces.
Nara leaps back. Another white sword appears in his hand. "You're wrong!" He yells and jumps into the air with an overhead attack.
"You fool!" The Shadow blocks the attack and shoves Nara back. Its twin swords aim to take off Nara's head. "You fucking weakling! You can't even face your own reality. You and your imaginary friends should just go to hell!"
Nara deflects the strike and forces the twin swords upwards. "Yeah…I know that already."
"What…?" The Shadow lowers its weapons.
Nara points his black sword at the Shadow. "That's right. I knew that it was all a fantasy. I'm nothing more than coward who didn't want to be close to people again. I kept pushing them away, because I was scared that I'd be hurt even more if I lost them. I wanted power, power to protect them from anything…"
The Shadow remains unmoving. "So then, that's it?"
Nara flourishes his weapons and resumes his strange stance. "I'll prove to you…if nothing else, my feelings for my friends are real. I won't lose to you…No…I will not lose to myself!"
A tense moment passes. Nara and the Shadow stare each other down.
"Heh…hahahahaha!" The Shadow charges forward and slashes at Nara viciously.
Nara's swords break over and over again. But every time, another sword would take its place. It was as though the concept of retreat meant nothing to Nara.
"You don't stand a chance. Just accept it and die!" The Shadow rages as it barrages Nara with steel.
Nara keeps his guard up, his footwork and motions quickly evading or deflecting attacks. How many times has he been disarmed now?
"I won't stop until I'm dead." Nara snarls. But I think even he knew that he would lose the moment he retreated away.
"Hehehe…Well then, I'll just have to kill you quickly." The Shadow is relentless. Strike after strike, it keeps pressing the attack.
The floor is littered with metal pieces. It seemed as though one of Nara's swords broke every few strikes now. His body is falters, and he's struck on the arm. He grits his teeth and strikes back, cutting off a piece of the Shadow's shoulder plate. More strikes cut into both combatants.
With each exchange of blows, Nara's already exhausted body gets cut up more and more.
But…he ignores the pain and perseveres.
I saw his face again. His expression is one of grim determination. His eyes…they weren't looking at his enemy. He was looking through the Shadow at something none of us could see.
"Ah…That's why…" My eyes widen with realization.
It surprised me when I first came to blows with him. It was a shock that there was anyone who could possibly match my power. But now I understand why he's still standing, even against such a difficult opponent.
Nara's never been fighting an external enemy. With every strike, he's fighting himself. The self that holds him back. It's so simple when I think about it. He's…someone who should naturally be considered strong.
…...
Chapter 21: Schism of the Heavens (Nara)
My arms scream in agony. My fingers feel as though they're fractured. My legs are sluggish. The cuts all over my body feel like they're being torn open more with every motion I make. But my vision is clear. I can see my enemy's every move.
"Hah…hah…!" I can't retreat. I have to be stronger. I keep swinging the swords in my hands.
I have no combat capabilities without the System. Right now, it's painfully obvious that without combat data I'm being outclassed in every way imaginable.
But even without the System to supplement my skills…my body remembers it. The technique that my master taught me. The only sword style that I ever had any talent at. One of pure defense that I worked tirelessly to learn…!
"I am a shadow...the true self... I'm just being true to myself...existence is meaningless…I'll destroy…everything!" The Shadow was becoming more agitated. Every second that I survived was fuel for its rage.
I won't be able to keep this up much longer.
"Ellie…how are the preparations?" I ask, gasping for breath. Every fibre of my being feels like it's broken. Hurry…!
"Start your incantation now."
I take a breath. With each clash of my sword against the Shadow's, I begin my chant.
I seek meaning in existence, yet as I step forward I have nothing but pain.
The Shadow flinches at the words. "What are you scheming?!" Its attacks redouble in fury. I dampen with Bakuya what would have been a fatal strike to my neck. The other blade stabs forward, grazing my cheek before I could dodge out of the way and strike back. Kanshou and Bakuya shatter into pieces. But in the next moment I'm already gripping the handles of another Kanshou and Bakuya.
I have walked over countless roads, overcome a thousand trials.
I know not where my destiny lies and I reach out for light that I cannot see.
This was the only path, an aimless oblivion through which I wander.
Thus, my life has no meaning.
"SHUT UP!" The Shadow's attack throws me backwards. I smash into a pillar. I cough a few times…but I ignore the pain and keep speaking.
But as I brave the shadows, I give thee this silent vow.
I will defy the heavens, against all odds.
I will find my reason to exist.
"Die…die…die die die die die…DIE!" The sword is mere centimeters from piercing my heart.
And as I pray, I call forth my true power. Look up and behold…the Schism of the Heavens.
BOOOOOOOM!
A howling wind erupts from my position. It's so powerful the Shadow staggers backwards, barely able to maintain its balance. A typhoon quickly surrounds my body. This is what I've been waiting for…
The whirlwind slices the fabric of reality apart, transforming everything. In an instant, everyone in the main lobby is now in a vast grassy plain that stretched out to the horizon. Dark clouds blot out the sun. The howling winds remain unabated, now joined by rainfall so heavy that it obscures all vision in my right eye.
"What…is this…?" The Shadow stares at the column of thirteen massive totem poles behind me, completely perplexed. It's amazing that it can still see while it is here.
Behind the totem poles, all manners of weapons are stuck into the ground like crosses. Every single weapon I've encountered during my time in the System. They're at my fingertips now, awaiting my command.
Yamato appears at my side. I draw it from the sheath and cast the sheath aside. There'll be no need for it here.
"Welcome…to my world." I hold Yamato with both hands. My vision darts past the blade, at my Shadow. At the self that I must defeat. "What you see before you is the pinnacle of weaponry, the finest of treasures."
"Don't fuck with me…!" The Shadow charges at me with a roar.
"Hmph." I lower my stance. My body is ready for the explosion. Everything clicks into place.
With the thunderclap from the skies above, I rush forward to confront the enemy before me. I raise Yamato with a shout. "Well what are you waiting for?! Come on!"
A bolt of lightning strikes Yamato's blade, covering it in jet black flames. Behind me, the weapons stuck into the ground rise into the air one by one. Each of them rotates and aimed themselves at my Shadow.
I put all of my remaining strength into a single attack.
The Shadow does not retreat. Its swords glow as pale as moonlight. Trails of energy arc off the tips and disintegrate the water droplets falling onto the blades. My Shadow drags the swords along the ground, leaving a trail of blazing fire behind it.
Three steps. The distance between us closes in a heartbeat. Yamato crashes against the twin swords. Overhead, various swords, axes, spears, and hammers rain from the sky like carpet bombs. Each weapon created an earthshattering tremor as they exploded upon hitting the ground. It was enough to even shake the mountains in the distance.
It was as though time halted to a grinding stop for me. I could hear nothing. See nothing. Feel nothing.
Was I…flying through the air again?
I hit the ground hard and slid to a stop, water and mud soaking every part of my body.
For a moment, I can't see anything. Then a blade appears and hovers over my face. I blink twice. The blade wavers and disappears. I hear a thwack sound as something hits the ground and sprays my left side with mud.
"Haha…" I turn my head and smile weakly at my own face. "Guess I win, huh?"
The Shadow stares back at me with a blank face. It seems to be waiting for me to say something.
Slowly, I move my left arm. I reach for my Shadow's hand. I grip it with what little strength I could muster.
"You were right…You were right about me." I murmur as rain washes the mud and blood off of my body. "As dumb as I am, even I know that I can't run forever."
The Shadow is silent and expressionless. But it nods.
"There's one thing you're wrong about, though. Even if my friends are only here in the System…the feelings and hardships we've shared are not illusions. They're precious to me…all of them. Even if I leave here one day, our memories will always remain."
More silence.
"Hey…tell me. Do you really think that you're alone?"
"I never had anyone. Friends, family…it's as though those are a concept from a life time ago."
I laugh. "Yeah, we didn't. But things are different now. Even if it's only a dream, even if I have to wake up from it one day…my wish…was not a mistake." I look into the Shadow's eyes. My eyes. All of the suffering that I've kept bottled up this time. I could see it reflected at me. "I'm sorry that I tried to forget. I wanted to forget the past, to just live as though it never happened."
The Shadow stares back at me momentarily. Then it smiles and closes its eyes. Its expression became peaceful.
"You've always been such a weakling, running away the moment you get stuck at a wall. That's why I'm here. So you won't forget."
"…Thank you. You really are me." I finally accept it. I accept the part of me that I had repressed for so long. I was scared of betraying everything I've been up to now. But instead of feeling empty, I felt complete.
The feeling of my Shadow's hand disappears slowly. A tarot card with the Sun Arcana appears in a column of blue light and spins around in place, floating just above my hand.
"Persona…" The word echoes in my mind. The Card disappears.
Suddenly I feel tired. Very tired. The cold rain falling on my entire front side could not do anything to keep me conscious. It was like fighting against a dark river. I was swept under and taken again.
…