Agent's Spiel: I can't tell you how long the first version of this chapter has actually been sitting on my computer. I know it was finished before the last chapter was posted but it just wasn't sitting well with me so I never posted it. I'm mildly happier with this version. It still isn't great and – even though I've twisted most of these characters to the point that they aren't really recognizable as their canon counterparts – these people are still more out of character than I'd like (and way more out of character than most of you will like – sorry). Still, it more or less get across the points that I wanted to.

Naruto will be using alternate means of communication:

Single quotation marks '' will be used to represent sign language and other forms of communication (Amarante Code begins to be used in this chapter). I'll denote which is being used but you'll probably pick it up quickly on your own.

Front slashes / will denote Naruto writing what he is saying.

Italics mean you are reading the characters thoughts; congratulations on becoming telepathic. Of course it generally only applies to Sakura and Kakashi so I'm not necessarily sure telepathy is good thing around those two.

Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto.

Snakes: Interlude

Anko nervously made her way through the village streets, her eyes darting frantically around her. If it had still been morning, she would have been on the run from the Hokage's guards, now she was just nervous wreck and expecting Orochimaru or one of his flunkies to jump her.

There were three ANBU teams in the forest now. There would be two more by morning if he wasn't found. All they knew for 'certain' was that a team from Kumogakure had been found dead near the remains of a very large snake. One that probably hadn't been summoned but which definitely showed signs of control.

And her cousin hadn't reached the tower the day before. Or that day. Or if he had the Hokage hadn't told her before sending her out that evening to fetch a hopefully hangover free Kakashi.

So now she was walking down the streets of her own village expecting an attack. If she hadn't felt so worried for her cousin or his team she probably would have talked Kakashi into joining her for a drink before heading to the tower in Area 44.

But she was worried.

And besides that she knew she would get drunk long before Kakashi would and that would be boring. For all she knew he would sneak into her Aunt's house and set in on fire just for the hell of it. I'm still not sure when he decided to become a pyro. Must be 'cuz of Obito.

Of course now Obito's little cousin Sasuke was in the middle of an ANBU training area and possibly Orochimaru's real target. And the Hokage didn't know what Orochimaru would do when he learned that Sasuke didn't have the sharingan.

Even though he did.

He just hid it because Anko had convinced him to.

"Shit," she muttered, gaining alarmed glances from the civilians around her. Not that she noticed she was so deep in her thoughts.

She didn't notice Gai or Asuma when they started following her either.

She just kept walking towards Kakashi's apartment.

And then she reached it.

And decided to delay facing him as long as possible. So she knocked softly and politely knowing he wouldn't hear it if he had a hangover so it would give her a few moments to compose herself. Because apparently she had started crying and some point and couldn't remember when.

"Anko?"

No, no, no. Not him. Not him. Give me Kakashi. Not him.

"Anko."

"Yes?" she asked turning meekly to face Iruka, as she knocked loudly on Kakashi's door.

"Are you-. What happened to them?" Iruka asked, paling. I knew it was too soon. And with Naruto still weakened-

"As far as I know nothing has happened yet. There was a breach though. Three Genin were discovered dead this morning outside our walls even though I saw them enter the forest yesterday," she managed to explain without meeting Iruka's eyes. Screw delays, she thought as she knocked on Kakakshi's door again.

"Who could have wanted into the exam? Do they think Kumo sent someone else?"

"No," Anko whispered before pounding on Kakashi's door in exasperation. Where is that jackass?

Iruka watched as the woman continued avoiding his eyes and frantically attempted to gain attention from inside the apparently empty apartment. "I think if he was home he would have answered by now," he offered.

"Never know with Hatake. He tends to ignore me when he doesn't feel up to my bullshit," Anko answered.

"If nothing had happened you wouldn't be trying to get Kakashi's attention right now. You would be back at the Forest proctoring the exam."

"I told you, there was a breach and the Hokage assured me that nothing had happened but he told me to get Kakashi," Anko stated, fidgeting under Iruka's glare – it was probably the same one he gave to students who tried to get out of class and it made her feel like she was a child again.

"So why don't you believe it? Who the hell is in there that you think is after them? And if that's the case, then why didn't you just go in after them as well?"

Anko winced at the anger in Iruka's voice – it took a lot to get him riled up. But she wasn't one to back down from fight – at least a fight she hadn't been order to avoid – so she turned to face Iruka, matching his glare with her own. "Because I was ordered not to. Because first that jackass Ibiki had to stop me from going in and then the Hokage threatened me and I had to sit in the tower all day being babysat like a teenager by Koharu until Sarutobi decided that I could finally come get Kakashi. Except he isn't here because he's probably getting drunk again or blowing up Sasuke's house and that bastard is in there interrupting my exam and I can't go in after him and Sarutobi won't because he still feels guilty like the idiot he is and now Orochimaru is going to kill one of them and I can't go in and neither can Kakashi-"

Anko was cut off suddenly when she found her back against the wall being held down by a very pissed off Umino Iruka. Crap. "Did you just Orochimaru of the Sannin is in the Forest of Death with my students? My rookie students who I told the Hokage –"

His rant didn't get very far either.

"Did you just punch me?" Iruka asked glaring up at Kakashi. Anko remained frozen up against the wall as she looked between the two men. Double crap.

Crap, crap, crap, crap, crap.

"What is going on here?" Asuma asked strolling around the corner as if he hadn't been listening to Anko's entire rant and wondering whether or not his father was insane…or just stupid.

"I'm not sure," Kakashi admitted. "I didn't peg Iruka as so aggressive."

"You're an idiot," Iruka stated, wiping the blood off his lip and standing up. He ignored Kakashi completely and turned to Anko instead.

"Is he pulling the rookies out or not?"

"No. He sent in ANBU but they weren't to interfere in the exam," she admitted.

"Why would ANBU go in?" Kakashi asked in confusion.

"Exactly how much of that argument did you manage to hear before knocking Iruka on his ass?" Asuma asked, not sure if he should be amused or terrified by Kakashi erratic behavior. Just in case it was…well either, he scanned the skyline to make sure there were no noticeable plumes of smoke wafting from the direction of the Uchiha compound.

Kakashi ignored Asuma's question, instead he remained fixated on Anko and Iruka.

"Orochimaru is here," Anko admitted. "Ibiki and the Hokage threatened to lock us up if we went in after him."

Kakashi stared at her for a moment, his face completely unreadable. He tilted his head slightly to glance once, a bit cautiously at Asuma and Gai.

Then he moved.

Gai managed to catch him on the rooftops and drag him back to the front of his apartment building, but not before causing enough of a scene that the civilians below had taken off inside.

"You said you were sent to get Kakashi. What are your orders?" Asuma asked once Gai had Kakashi securely pinned in their presence.

"We're supposed to use the tunnel to go to the Forest tower to wait out the exam. We both have explicit orders not to enter the Forest proper," Anko answered monotonely as she glared at Asuma. He was left with the feeling that all she saw in him was the father who had delivered those orders at some point during the day.

"Then let's do that. I'll go with you of course. No need to get in trouble now," Asuma stated, pulling out a cigarette as he grabbed hold of one of Kakashi's arm. When Kakashi seemed to be considering breaking free, Asuma turned to him and stared at him like he was child. "You and Anko won't be any good to your students if you get locked up until the end of the exam. You also won't be any good to them if you enter the forest, run into Orochimaru, and then get killed. So let's go wait at the tower."

"Remind to beat the crap out of you later," Kakashi muttered.

"Before you leave…Kakashi if I were to head over to the Uchiha compound would I find it still standing?" Iruka asked.

"Is that why you were here?" Asuma chuckled.

"He hasn't been seen all day and he got drunk last night. Last time that happened he burned something."

"Do you see smoke?" Kakashi asked smartly.

"No. But I doubt you need to put up a flag to destroy something."

"Only Sasuke can pull that trigger," Kakashi finally answered before wrenching his arm out of Asuma's grip and pulling Anko up to the roof.

"I'm going with them to make sure they actually do as they were told," Asuma stated, following after them.

"Those two complete idiots," Iruka muttered when he was left alone with Gai. "Why were the two of you here anyways?"

"I was coming by to make sure he was still alive," Gai admitted a bit bashfully. "At first it was very amusing to see him once again one up me by leaving me with his bar tab and I was going to come challenge him to make us even again when Asuma stopped by. He actually looked at the tab. It was…impressive. I made a note to never challenge him to a drinking contest and then decided to make sure he hadn't died of alcohol poisoning."

"I thought the Hokage told the bars around here not to serve him anymore."

"I checked with the bartender. He offered to pay double."

"You still got stuck with the bill, didn't you?"

"It's going to take a week's pay to cover it," Gai muttered before heading off to the Academy to check on his team's status. A few Cloud genin were one thing. Orochimaru was completely different matter. He hoped his genin, and all the others, made it out of there without a confrontation of that level.

Agent's Spiel: Like I said above, the characters in this chapter still annoy me but it's been months since I've updated and I figured that once again, something was better than nothing as long as it moved the story a bit further.

I'm not promising anything really, but I think I'm only going to bother writing two more interludes. I had requests to do one from Chouji's point of view and one from TenTen's and I think both of those would be interesting. After that…well we'll wait and see. I'm trying a few writing exercises because my brain just doesn't want to form coherent pages most of the time and hopefully some of them will pay off…eventually.

Also no notes this time.

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I know there were a lot more of you but I'm tired. Thank you for all the reviews as always. If I didn't get back to you at all and you had a question just drop a comment on the blog.