When Kakashi bolted back to the assigned room for Konoha applicants, he was relieved to find the two remaining members of his team being cared for by Asuma, Guy and Kurenai.

"My eternal rival!" Guy joyously greeted, "you look winded!"

Somehow, Kakashi found, Guy seemed a bit too eager about that. Somewhat annoyed, he leveled Guy with a deadpan stare, but hurriedly proceeded to look away when the flamboyant man tried to turn it into a staring contest.

"How are Naruto and Sakura?" Kakashi nervously asked instead.

Kurenai looked up with a start, as though surprised that he was showing concern for his team. Clearly she didn't know Kakashi very well. Asuma, however, took his inquiry in a stride.

"Naruto seems fine," he drawled, taking a deep drag from his cigarette. By his feet, Naruto was snoring as loudly as ever while scratching his bottom. Kakashi deemed his condition acceptable.

"What about Sakura?"

"She'll live, Kakashi," said Kurenai with a shrug, patting the crown of her bubblegum-pink head. Kakashi glanced over at his other student, who lay passed out in a sprawl over the floor. He hadn't noticed earlier how badly Sakura truly looked – worse for wear even than after her encounter with Zabuza; though she thankfully didn't seem to have any head injuries.

"She doesn't look so well…" Kakashi assessed slowly, glancing at Kurenai out of the corner of his eye. Asuma chuckled uncomfortably, slinging an arm around him.

"Ah, come off it, Kakashi. The worst thing she had was a dislocated elbow; kid'll be fine."

"Not until I've looked at them with my sharingan."

Guy laughed out loud. "Aw! My eternal rival is so dedicated! But beware Kakashi, for I shan't be defeated in this aspect of…"

Kakashi tuned him out, looking over his students thoughtfully, sharingan ablaze.

Naruto seemed to have some strange chakra fluctuations. Though it was not a pressing issue, Kakashi wasn't sure whether he could fix that problem himself…

Blearily, he realized that Guy had been mid-proclamation when he started his sharingan-based examination, now likely awaiting a reply.

"I'm sorry, did you say something?"

Sputtering in comical outrage, Guy proceder to dramatically face-plant on the floor and then started another proclamation about "Most hip and cool behaviors exhibited by you, Kakashi!"

As per usual, Kakashi ignored him and turned his sharingan to Sakura. She didn't have chakra exhaustion, which was a relief, though its flow was still strangely urgent, as opposed to her usual near-nonexistent circulatory fluctuations. From her head injury at Wave, Kakashi knew that Sakura's chakra was usually stagnant, hence why she was so good at manipulating it. But not now. Now it was all over the place. What was going on? Was she under a genjutsu? Kakashi frowned, clueless. No, she wasn't, he would've spotted it were that the case. Could she be pumping so much chakra because of adrenaline, he wondered. It should've worn off already, but then again, maybe Sakura was having a nightmare or something. Kakashi decided that, whatever Sakura had, it wasn't a pressing issue either, likely to be solved off its own. Still, he'd monitor her condición. But as for Naruto… He wasn't so sure about his seal though… if Orochimaru had tampered with the it, they'd all be in trouble…

TWISTED

Sakura woke up roughly twenty three hours later.

She could tell that she was lying on a stack of old pillows, probably in a corner of the room for Konoha genin, though she felt too drowsy to check.

"Nice. You woke up," said a voice to her right.

Surprised, Sakura opened her eyes. Kakashi was lounging right in front of her, looking nonchalant as ever.

And that's when Sakura realized… Sensei's back! She was so happy that she grinned to an almost crazed degree, bolting upwards into a sitting position.

"Sensei! You came!"

But her joy was short lived. As soon as she remembered Sasuke, Sakura's expression fell.

"How… is he?" she then asked subduedly.

Looking up from his book, Kakashi smiled and gave her a thumbs up. "You'll find him in perfect health. He and Naruto even had an argument already."

Sakura looked at him with something akin to wonder. "But how? His condition was terrible!"

Kakashi patted her head. "No worries, Sakura-chan. He's in the hall, if you feel the need to check."

Sakura stared at him. "Wait. You don't mean for him to participate in the next stage of the exam, do you?"

Kakashi scratched his head. "Why ever not?"

Sakura got up jerkily, not believing her ears. "Because, Sensei, a crazy psychopath is after his head!"

Kakashi chuckled, decidedly not giving her concerns the deserved importance. "Do elaborate on that," he offered merrily. "And feel free to sit down again."

Grudgingly, Sakura complied, resolutely opening her mouth as she thought of all that she had to tell Kakashi-sensei.

But–

"…I can't!" she chocked out suddenly, wild images racing through her mind. "I…" she thought of Wolf, lying on the ground with bleeding holes in his face… of the sound team, of the corpses with leeches feasting on them, of Oroch–

(Nononono–)

"Sakura-chan?"

Sakura grabbed her hair wildly, pressing her palms against her eyes, rocking back and forth desperately as she began hyperventilating.

"Sakura-chan?"

She lifted her hands from her face, sullenly facing Kakashi. "I… I can't talk about it!"

"Can't or don't want to?"

Sakura cringed. She knew she had to, for Sasuke, for team seven, but at the same time… she just couldn't open up about what had happened in the forest, about what she herself had done. She just couldn't!

"I don't want to talk about it," she repeated.

Kakashi placed a hand on her head. "No one does." She sighed. "But, Sakura-chan, you need to speak up. All of it is relevant, despite what you might think. You said Sasuke's in danger? Do you think Orochimaru will come back?"

Sakura's downcast gaze fixed on a spot on the wall. Not talking about what had transpired in the forest was shellfish of her, she knew. She knew that she had to, even if she wanted to put it all behind her.

Deeply sucking in a breath of air, Sakura chanced another glance at Kakashi. "I don't know about Orochimaru, but, by psychopath, I meant Gaara," she said hesitantly.

Kakashi quirked a brow. "You think he's a threat?"

"Definitely."

"Care to elaborate?"

At that, Sakura went stiff as a board. Kakashi sighed. "I take it you don't want to talk about it either."

"I really don't."

Frowning, Kakashi scratched his head. "Sakura-chan…"

"I know I have to, okay? I just…" Sakura made a strangled sound in the back of her throat, furious with herself. Tears of frustration were prickling at her eyes.

"It's, er, fine," Kakashi amended quickly, before Sakura could actually start crying. He seemed quite clueless so as to how to deal with the situation at hand, what with crying girls not being exactly his line of expertise. "Uh… Sakura-chan, be calm… please?" he tried hesitantly. She wasn't listening. Kakashi took another approach. "Sakura, listen, no one's asking you to talk about it, least of all me," he promised, to which Sakura luckily seemed to pay more attention. "I just want the intel," consoled Kakashi, looking uncomfortable. "Do you know what I do, when I don't want to talk about something with my superiors?"

Sakura glared at him through puffy eyes. "You don't."

"And besides that?"

"You make stupid excuses everyone knows are lies."

Kakashi smirked covertly. "Maybe so, but do you think I also lie to the Hokage?"

Sakura snorted. "You're liable to do anything, Sensei."

"Please, have a little more faith, Sakura-chan…" he muttered with embarrassment. "Maybe, maybe I've lied to the Hokage at some point, but not when there's a mission at stake…"

Sakura sighed. "Your point being?"

"My point being that I have to open up to the Hokage, who is not exactly going to try and coddle me when it comes down to asking about the details."

Sakura frowned. Kakashi was right. At some point or other, she'd have to deal with the Hokage's scrutiny too… She shivered. She didn't even want to think about what that sort of situation entailed…

"But how can you posively cope with that?" she deflected weakly.

Kakashi seemed to have been waiting for the question. "Why, I write a mission report."

Sakura quirked a brow. "So?"

"It beats having to narrate everything in person."

Detached, cold… Sakura looked up firmly. Exactly what I need.

"So you want me to write a report about the forest of death?" she queried, regaining the strength in her voice. "Did the Hokage put you up to this?"

Kakashi went silent for a moment, pulling a standard issue handbook out of his pouch. The pages were blank. "I said have a little more faith, Sakura, now where is it? Look, I'm not asking you this just because Konoha's survival depends on this intelligence," (No pressure there, jeered Inner,) "I'm asking this of you for your own sake, Sakura." He scratched his head idly. "Sooner or later, you're gonna have to tell someone what's on your mind to help lighten the burden," Kakashi looked really serious as he said that, "and believe me when I say: the sooner, the better."

Sakura frowned. Her teacher sounded as though he knew what he was talking about. He must know. The man was, after all, an elite jonin, and Sakura had not exactly forgotten how he'd nonchalantly faked being sliced up into smithereens on her first true mission, apprehending two dangerous ninja as he went. What to Sakura had been a horrible experience that had scared her to death and made her clumsily twist her ankle, to Kakashi had all just been a breeze. Yes, thought Sakura, Kakashi definitely knew what it meant to maim, what it meant to kill. She shivered, suddenly scared of this very man, this man she'd trusted with her life. Nevertheless, she pressed on:

"When did you talk to someone, Sensei?"

How much time had he passed suffering in silence, until, finally, incessant nightmares and guilt had made him cave?

Kakashi sat in silence. The he said:

"I'm not the most indicated person to talk with, and I get that maybe you don't want to share this with me, but until you get home, you should at least take a moment to pen everything in. It'll help."

He passed her the notebook. Sakura barely felt the rough, green cover slide under her fingers. She could only think: Sensei didn't answer me, he's avoided the question!

Sighing, Sakura glanced at Kakashi wearily. She almost wished she hadn't asked, for now she knew something about him she would rather not. Kakashi was always so nonchalant, so flippant. He might look like a human, but Sakura had never realized that he perhaps had human worries and fears. She didn't want to realize this. Not now. Not ever.

She glanced back at the notebook. The cover was a standard issue green, with a rough, paper-like texture, small enough to fit into her weapons pouch. The navy blue Konoha crest right in the middle reminded her a little of her Academy days. Who would've thought that Kakashi carries around a notebook like this? He seemed earnest about giving it to her, about his suggestion to confide in it.

"So… you want me to write about the forest, huh, Sensei?" said Sakura. "Shall I give this to the Hokage once I'm done?"

"If you can manage it."

"Hm."

Kakashi frowned.

"But will you? Write, I mean. About how you felt and things. You don't need to show that version to Hokage-sama."

Sakura smiled theatrically.

"I'll pour my heart out."

"Good," said Kakashi, "knock yourself out."

Laughing, Sakura saluted. "With pleasure!" she exclaimed, trying to appear at least slightly cheery about the prospect.

Kakashi saluted back. "Now that's what I like to hear. Take your time, make the Hokage wait. You are my student after all."

Sakura returned his smile feebly, clutching his notebook. Sensei understood her, didn't he?

"What did Sasuke tell you? Did you make him write a report?" she asked huskily. "Or Naruto?"

"Naruto was eaten by a snake, I really didn't want the details.".

"Sorry Sensei, but nothing beats having an aligator feast on your boat."

"Now that sounds like a story," said Kakashi placidly. "Where on Earth did you find a boat?"

I thought he was going to ask about the aligator, but that's Kakashi for you, drawled Inner. Laughing at the joke, Sakura airily said:

"Oh! I built it." She shrugged offhandedly. "You know how it is, what with leeches everywhere and such, one needs to get creative."

"And you found an aligator."

"Yeah. Or rather, it found the boat – but I managed to get us out in time. You know, before it started munching all over the prow."

Kakashi scratched his masked cheek. "That sounds fun."

Sakura glanced at him out of the corner of her eye. She thought briefly, then resolved to ask the question:

"Ne, Sensei… do you judge people?"

Kakashi put a hand to his chin thoughtfully.

"People?" He seemed to consider this. "I do, just like they will inevitably judge me." Here he surreptitiously glanced at his side-pocket, where Sakura suspected a certain orange book was kept.

"Oh, I see…" she said glumly.

He'd be disgusted by me then. I gouged Wolfe's eyes out. His eyes! I bet Sensei hates people who do that! I mean, he has a huge scar over his left eye and…

"Huh?"

Kakashi was waving Icha Icha in front of Sakura's face tauntingly.

"I make a point not to judge shinobi though," he commented once he had her attention again, his eyes crinkling.

Sakura couldn't help but gape.

"I gouged someone's eyes out!"

…oops.

The words had slipped out before she could stop them. Gasping with horror, Sakura pressed her palms over her mouth, her own eyes wide. He was now there, right before her. The senbon-nin, her fingers coated in muck, the hollowness…

Kakashi looked at her silently, every second of his wordless stare turned minutes, hours. Sakura grit her teeth painfully, holding her breath.

Finally, Kakashi spoke, his gaze vacant:

"I've done worse, Sakura."

And Sakura believed him. She had known, on a very superficial way that he must have, but she had t been prepared to hear the admission. Kakashi's voice resounded in the silent room, resounded in Sakura's core, echoed on in her brain.

Worse. Worse. Worse.

Sakura retreated shakily, staring at Kakashi with widened eyes. There it was again, the fear of someone she trusted so dearly. Kakashi himself remained perched at the foot of her makeshift bed, the colorful novel still in his gloved hand. He seemed to understand the urgent need of an explanation, and this time it wasn't about his being 'lost on the road of life.' No. Just this once, Kakashi would speak about a different road – the path of shinobi.

"Every jonin you know, Sakura-chan," said Kakashi, "– the hokage included – they've all done worse. Way worse." His black eye examined her speculatively. "Will you judge them for it?"

Sakura felt sick.

"How can I not?" she breathed weakly. "It's disgusting!"

Kakashi looked at her intently, his eyes obscure and revealing nothing. Ever so slowly, his hand extended to his side, retrieving a shuriken from his pouch with practiced ease, to then wave it in front of her nose.

"Sakura-chan, what is this?"

The textbook answer was…

Sakura pondered over it briefly. This was better than thinking of Wolf.

"A shuriken," she recited, "literally meaning 'hidden hand blade' is a concealed weapon which is most often used as a hidden dagger or metsubushi to distract or misdirect. They are supplementary weapons to our katana or kunai, although they often have an important tactical effect in battle. The art of wielding the shuriken is known as shurikenjutsu…" Here Sakura stopped to take a breath. She continued more wearily: "The edges are often sharpened, so that they can be used to penetrate skin or open arteries…"

Sakura cut herself off, grimacing, the image of the senbon-ninja not leaving her. His eyes… her fingers…

Kakashi spun the shuriken in his palm.

"Shuriken are weapons," he summarized. "Sakura-chan, do you know what a weapon is?"

This time, Sakura didn't fall back on the textbooks.

"It's a means to an end. It's a tool used for violence, it's…"

"–a shinobi," Kakashi completed. "Do you know… why I don't judge shinobi?"

Sakura shook her head mutely, though she had a feeling that she didn't want to.

"It's not a shinobi's job to judge, Sakura," Kakashi said bleakly, his single eye fixed on her. "We remain within the scope of our rules. We are tools." Kakashi returned the shuriken to its holster, now examining the sharp edges thoughtfully. "Rather than judging a shinobi for his actions, Sakura-chan, you should look at the hand that holds the strings. I've said it before, and I will say it again: a ninja should always seek to look underneath the underneath."

Kakashi scratched his head uncomfortably, probably ill at ease with talking for so long.

"I'm not a tool…" Sakura muttered, horrified.

"No," Kakashi agreed. "Konoha shinobi tent to do that."

Sakura stared at him, her viridian eyes wide and moist, disillusioned.

"Are you a tool?"

Unexpectedly, Kakashi chuckled and patted her head.

"Tools aren't late to their meetings, now are they?"

Sakura smiled.

"I guess not."

TWISTED

Hiya! What did you think about this chapter? Was it too heavy?

By the way, in regards to issues with the update-notification link… I'M SO SORRY! Listen, I've done everything I can to fix this, composed a detailed email to fad fiction support, tries changing some things, but nothing will work and support isn't answering. If you have any ideas I'd be grateful if you shared them with me. And please, please don't stop reading my story just because the system is broken. Even if you get fake update notifications… I publish a chapter every Friday. If it's not on Friday or more than one chapter, then it's not me. I hope I've helped clear up some of this confusion…