Episode: Blah Blah Woof Woof
-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-
Chapter 25
Saying Good-bye
-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-
Max Voiceover:
He's driving us to his family's cabin. The same cabin he always mentioned in passing that we should go to for a weekend. This isn't for a weekend trip though.
Zack's getting his wish. I'm leaving Seattle. I'm leaving everyone and everything behind minus what I was wearing this morning and the spare things I kept at Logan's.
This music is depressing me further, of course sad's in the title so that's not really surprising. I woke up this morning at 5am and Logan was sleeping next to me. That same boyish expression and hand on my back as always. The exact same sight I see at least 3 times a week. I'm trying to remember now why I instituted that rule in my mind; it had started out as twice, never see him more than twice a week. Then it slid into three times. Last week though it had been four.
Oh that's right I was trying to keep this from hurting so bad…Funny, I don't think it worked.
-o-o-o-o-o-o-
"We're here." he said pulling up in front of a cabin.
"Thanks for the ride." Zack said hopping out.
Max held her breath and looked over at him. This couldn't be it, this couldn't be goodbye. "Are you going to stay for awhile?"
He looked slightly surprised by that, shocked that she'd ask him and not just run off like he was so used to. He nodded, "I've got to be back in town by eleven though."
She nodded and swallowed hard opening the door. Just a few hours left…
Logan walked around to the trunk and pulled out the bag he'd packed of her things.
-o-o-o-o-o-o-
"Come on" he said standing up from the couch; they'd both just been sitting there for five minutes trying to figure out what to say. The only noise that of the shower running in Zack's room.
"Where are we going?" she asked following him through the front door.
"Somewhere your brother isn't".
-o-o-o-o-o-o-
He walked her down to the lake, where they just stood for a few moments watching the water before Max decided to sit overlooking it.
He sat down next to her on the dock. "You know this isn't the way I pictured my day going."
She gave a weak smile, "What helping your fugitive girlfriend go on the lam?"
He nodded, "Didn't think when I woke up to find my bed empty like normal that is was going to stay that way." He gave a slight chuckle and shook his head.
"What?" she turned her head.
"I don't know. Guess this isn't the way I expected this to end."
They'd both always known it was coming though, "How'd you expect it to end? Me throwing some priceless relic at your head and storming out?" She joked
He laughed, "You don't throw things when you're mad, you get quiet."
She smiled, "So how did you think we were going to end?"
He shook his head, "I have no idea…Just not like this. Probably would have made last night more special."
She swallowed hard and thought about the night before, Logan dashing between the kitchen and his computer as he finished cooking, on and off his phone as she watched tv and him with amusement. She ate while perched on the table watching him work, he'd occasionally turn his head and she'd feed him off her plate.
"Mmm" he sighed, leaning back in his chair finally after putting down his phone.
"Crisis averted?" she smiled down.
"For the moment. I'm sorry."
"No biggie. I at least had food to keep me company."
His whole crisis had taken less than 40 minutes and really hadn't impacted their night, but she knew what he meant. He had moments when he'd go overboard; forget they were a simple, uncomplicated couple of convenience. That's what they were when it came down to it, they were together when their schedules fit, well when Logan had free time and she didn't have the strength to fight staying away, to go out with the girls instead of being just curled up with him. Sometimes though completely out of the blue there would be these romantic, candlelight with music playing in the background dinners. He would take her in his arms and they would dance in his living room. He meant one of those nights.
Those nights hadn't scared her though; they hadn't made her want to run.
The nights that made her want to run were nights like last night. When she was content just chillin as he did his thing. Feeding him off her plate as he worked, smiling down when he groaned in frustration and he'd always turn and flash her one in turn. The kiss that always accompanied the end of work. A long deep kiss, part in celebration that it was over, part as an 'I'm sorry' for being an ass and doing work while they were supposed to be having a date. He'd finished eating while standing leaning up against a counter talking to her as she sat across from him on top of another. Then they'd just settled in and watched tv until the nearness of each other got the better of them and whatever they were watching was forgotten.
Sometimes it would be music that would make her panic later. She'd be walking around his apartment and the radio would be on and he'd grab her and start to dance with her. Not the flawless dancing of their romantic nights, though it always started out that way, it was paired with a few dips and twirls that were just for fun. That was truly rare though, when Logan and she both had their guards let down enough to just be free for a song.
She swallowed hard and hoped he didn't see it, "Can you tell" she paused for a moment, what was she supposed to say to her girls?
"I'll tell them you said goodbye"
She nodded and ordered the tears not to leave her eyes.
-o-o-o-o-o-o-
Awhile later, the master bedroom. Logan and Max curled into each other in bed.
She knew what he was waiting for, she knew the only way he could leave, he couldn't bear to say actually good-bye and neither could she. She waited awhile, she allowed herself to record every breath he took, exactly what this moment felt like. Then she forced her breathing to change, her body to relax even further. He continued to hold her though.
Then finally she felt his arms start to slide away from her, he sighed looking down at her and he brushed back her hair. "I love you, Max" he whispered and kissed the top of her head.
She remained still as she heard him gather his clothes and dress and then slip out of the room. She listened to the front door softly close and his car start.
She sat up with the sheet wrapped around her and hugged her legs to her body. He was gone. Logan Cale, defender of all that's good, protector of the downtrodden, righter of wrongs, just might have been the love of her life was gone.
"Hey Max" Zack said opening the door after knocking softly.
She looked up with tears in her eyes, she couldn't hide being weak any longer, "Don't Zack" she shook her head, "Don't tell me how it's for the best, don't tell me he wasn't good enough for me, don't tell me that all this sentimental crap doesn't mean anything." Her eyes connected with his, "I was happy living the lie Zack…The friends, the boyfriend, my apartment, stupid, trivial knickknacks that had no point whatsoever, I liked all of it…Hell I almost even like Normal."
He sat down at the edge of the bed, "We're never going to get to stop running Maxie. Normal lives don't work out for us."
"Have you ever even tried to have one?" she angrily asked
"Once…Didn't last for long." He looked at her, his little sister needed desperately to be comforted. "It could have been worse Maxie."
"How?"
"Just trust me, it could have."
-o-o-o-o-o-o-
She sat on the couch blinding staring into the fire, hoping to be mesmerized by the flames and force her focus away from the day's events. Zack had given her a glass of wine, but it tasted bitter to her, she doubted she'd ever be able to enjoy another glass of wine.
"Come on Maxie" He said sitting down on the floor in front of her, his blue eyes looking up at her. "At least you're with family."
'You're my family' she heard her own voice again and tore herself away from Zack's gaze and looked into the fire
'I love you, Max.'
She just stared blankly into the fire.
Okay so now here's the point that you get to decide if you want the story to stop there or to go on. If it goes on it becomes a very different story and this is a perfectly fine ending to the story. In fact, I might like this instead of the other ending I have written (I've shared repeatedly that I write out of order). The choice is up to you though…If you think this is where it should stop or if you think it should go on. If this is where you want it to stop then thank you for reading, I hope you enjoyed. If you're one of the "DON'T END THE STORY" people even when it's a fully complete little story (you know who you are) then I'll get another chapter up soon and don't say I didn't warn you it would change. So now is the time to review, a More or Stop will suffice (since I'm pretty sure there are a few of you out there that find reviewing to be painful). Thanks.