Effie's POV
"It's not dead here. We just had to go even more underground than before." A man insists, a rebel who doesn't even dare to show me his face. He's a rebel I'm quite certain by what he knows (and the fact that he has not arrested me because I'm one as well like what a peacekeeper would most likely do), but he's frightened. Honestly I can understand that because I have had nightmares about being caught but I still find it quite silly that he must hide himself from me. His reasoning is due to the fact that if any of the rest of us left in the Capitol are caught that they will question us about our fellow rebels. If we don't know much about each other, then there is a less likely chance of more of us being caught or worse.
"But don't we know less?" I question the man. Obviously I don't know much specifically other than what I've been told because I am a more recent rebel, but I do know that several strange coincidences have occurred in the past few months. Odd people going missing, never being heard from again…they must have been rebels that President Snow knew about. Which means we have less and less people helping out here in the Capitol now.
"Not necessarily." The man answers and my eyebrows shoot up in surprise. To answer that, he continues, "We know who we can really trust now, even in District 13. Not everyone there are who they appear to be, manipulated to be that way or no. But we still have plenty to give and take."
"Could you give me some example?" I ask him, feeling a little silly that I'm so on the outskirts of everything happening.
"Why certainly." He nods, "For instance, did you know that President Snow wants custody of Makenna Hawthorne?"
"Why?" I gasp, though I don't quite know for certain why I do. After these last few months when I realized that Makenna was purposefully reaped into the Hunger Games I had somewhat realized that President Snow had something to do with it. With all of this. But it still does not make too much sense at all.
He sighs before replying, "We still do not know for certain." He shakes his head and then questions me, "You said that you heard some tantalizing gossip that may come in handy?"
"Well…I suppose it could be. I don't know for sure." I almost stutter and if I was not wearing this make up I'm certain he could see my cheeks blushing. It seems silly of me to think that anything I've heard of my gossiping tea friends could be of any help, but it's by far the only news of District 13 that I've heard not on television yet. And the rumors have to come from somewhere, right?
"Miss, I assure you that almost anything that appears like it could help us most likely can at some point in time." The man exclaims with a small smile and I decide to give him what I know. I so do want to help.
"Well to begin, some of the ladies at my tea group every week always seem to have the newest gossip on them." I reveal, quickly giving him the names of the mentioned ladies. I do feel a little horrible for doing this to them, but honestly I do not have a clue where they receive this information. Certainly they are always the first to know. "And they have told me how Gale and Katniss only speak when they are fighting, how Gale fell in love with some Capitol girl named Leta and brought her to District 13 with him. How he wants nothing to do with Makenna and most recently, how apparently he's secretly proposed to this Leta!" I rush out. It is certainly tantalizing news to me, but perhaps I seem silly to this man; quite clearly whoever he is, he's been a rebel far longer than I have.
"I see." The man nods, and somehow at least some of what I have revealed to him does not seem to surprise him in the least.
"So…is it true?" I question him.
"Some of it." The man nods and I wait for him to reveal just what is. "Gale and Katniss do fight all the time apparently, but it's not what you may think. The Capitol did something to Gale-"
"Yes I know. Dr. Calvus told me that but not specifically." I interrupt automatically, glad I have at least a small bit of information. But it was also quite rude of me and out of character to do so. I begin to apologize but he cuts me off, clearly knowing that I am truly sorry for my bad manners.
"Yes, what they did is made him not remember Katniss or Makenna. It was a mixture of concussions and mindsquito venom which has made it permanent." He tells me and my hand goes to my cheek.
"Oh dear." I gasp. That is simply horrible.
"So the fighting you are most likely hearing about is Katniss attempting to make Gale remember, but by all accounts it has not worked as of yet." The man claims. "Now as for the girl Leta…"
"It's true?" I ask. Honestly that was the one thing I simply did not ever believe was real, even when those ladies at tea described her in full.
"Well…I don't quite believe so, no. You see, both Gale and Katniss have spoken of a Leta, but no one else has ever met her. Meaning that I don't believe those rumors but perhaps she really does exist. Or at least at one point she did." He guesses and I give him a clearly confused look. She exists at one point? What could that even possibly mean? Did she die a horrible death?
"We think…well they believe that President Coin has been doing her own mind changing." He explains, "That perhaps this Leta girl did exist at one point but President Coin has changed her into somebody else."
"Why would she do that?" I question him. The only possible reason I could guess is to quash the rumors about Gale being with her, therefore showing everyone that the Capitol has been lying. If the girl does not exist anymore then the rumors have no validity. It's simple math, but in the gossiping world here in the Capitol it may not matter. I've seen it before, after all.
"We do not know that either, unfortunately." He frowns. "But thank you for this information. Perhaps my contact in District 13 can make something out of it."
"No problem." I smile. "And if it helps, I will continue to bring you all the rumors I hear."
"Of course, please do." He smiles and I beam. Perhaps I do not know everything, but I can still be a helpful rebel to those who really are rebels. Perhaps I can be the greatest rebel there is.
A girl can dream, can't she?
Katniss's POV
"I still don't really see what the point of this is." I grumble and a few others nod in agreement. When I started going to training I thought I was going to be a real soldier. As in I could be helpful, wielding a weapon at the Capitol. Not this. Not some prop for one of Plutarch's propos that gets a weapon but is told not to use it for real. I won't even be on the front lines along with the rest of the 'star squad' which consists of me, Gale (who is still pretending he hates me. It's gotten more difficult since I'm not truly too mad at him personally anymore but we still do it for the others benefit), Carper (who gets to hold a weapon but since he's in a wheelchair I do see the point in him being in the star squad. Victor or no, he's still in a wheelchair.), Lucy, Cecilia's daughter (I suspect more because she's a Victor's daughter and her mother died for the rebellion more than the fact that she's second in command of District 8) and the one I just simply don't understand at all, Annie Cresta.
I mean sure she's a Victor, but she's still mad. And she's not even with Finnick which I understand even less than why she is here. Even if Finnick wasn't allowed to come because Coin clearly doesn't trust him and would never let him out of her sights basically after their little blackmail session, I'm utterly shocked that he somehow didn't manage to get Annie out of the Star Squad. Unless he didn't know…and honestly, that could be the answer. Poor Annie just sits there with the gun laying in her lap that I'm not even certain she knows how to use let alone if she could bring herself to use it. And to top it off, the girl is pregnant. Who sends a pregnant girl into a battle? Only if you want to kill her…or punish Finnick.
"It's for the propos Katniss. You know that." Plutarch reminds me, though he seems almost as annoyed with Annie being here as we do. She doesn't belong here at all and I can sense that Plutarch does not want her here not because she's mad, but because it's for really no good reason. I don't honestly know why Finnick told us we can't trust him because he's never given me any reason to not, but maybe it's the same as Prim and Rory. Maybe he's being controlled somehow or at least forced to tell Coin everything he knows. I didn't entirely believe I couldn't trust Prim anymore until a few days ago. She claimed that she had to check me because of my miscarriage that never actually happened and was spitting out things that she found that I know aren't true. I made absolutely sure that I was never pregnant with the only doctor in 13 that Finnick actually trusts; some man that taught Duncan and never liked Coin. He told me that there was no evidence whatsoever of a miscarriage or a pregnancy just like there shouldn't have been and I believe him. I think I would have realized I was pregnant if I was about three months along; I had no symptoms whatsoever so I honestly have no reason that I believed Prim other than the fact that I never thought she would lie to me (manipulated to I'm certain though I still have no clue why) and that I had searing pain in my side so of course I was a little less focused on the things I should know but didn't think of at that point in time. And she never told me that she was pregnant but now that it's more obvious she does.
"Doesn't mean it's not stupid." I mutter and I sense Gale smirk even though he should still be pretending we aren't getting along. Only Finnick and Beetee know that we're…well not fine I guess but at least not really fighting. If Gale never gets his memory back then at least he seems alright right now with accepting what is true when it comes to Kennie and I. Maybe we could make it work after all. Of course the best thing would be for Gale to get his memories back but honestly, I don't believe in miracles. There really isn't any room for them in the world we live in, especially one where the rebels fighting for the greater good might actually well…probably aren't. Whatever Coin's plan is it can't be good, and whatever Snow's is won't be a lovely thing either.
Plutarch decides to ignore that last comment and the rest of the way to District 1 no one really speaks in our cabin just for our squad and Plutarch. There are a few people in our squad from District 13, like Boggs who is commander again (I do like him but he is too close to Coin to trust completely) and four soldiers that I don't really know. They don't really speak to us Victors much, though if that's because we 'outshine' them or the fact that since they're on our squad they will never see any real action and they would like to I don't know.
Once we arrive, we are all lead to one of the villages in District 1 that is still ran by the rebels. I'm honestly surprised how much and how quickly the Capitol took back most of District 1. I know that probably has something to do with whatever information Finnick gave them while he was being tortured (I don't know what exactly, he's never told me and he doesn't ever talk about his torture in the Capitol. And honestly, I can't find it in myself to blame him. I wouldn't either.) was probably vital enough for them to do so. After Boggs signs our squad in we're lead to where our tents will be and I quickly settle in mine for the night, knowing that our squad has the night off since we just got here and we won't have any duties until morning. What I really want to do is talk to Gale because we need to be more careful about how we act since these Victors know us better than the District 13 soldiers and might catch on to our acting, but I can't do that. I would have no good lie as to why I was going to his tent so I'll have to find a better place we can talk here. Instead, I decide to go visit Annie; I'm sure she could use someone for company that she doesn't have to be scared of anyway.
In the setting sky I find Annie's tent three down from mine and instead of asking for permission to go in because she probably would be too frightened to answer anyway, I slowly open the flap and peek inside. She's sitting on the lone cot in there, her hands protectively over her stomach but her eyes seem vacant and not there. I sigh, wishing that Finnick was here…no, wishing she wasn't here at all and she was with Finnick. At least he knows how to bring her back because I don't have the first clue.
I know I have to try something though, so I start with just calling her name, softly at first but then louder as I quietly and slowly get closer to her. It doesn't seem to work though, and she doesn't even react when I sit on the cot next to her, studying her. Her eyes still have that far away look in them and I wonder if this is how I looked when I sort of…went away like my mother did when my father died a few months ago after what happened at our house in Victor's Village, that awful video Snow showed me. Seeing it again makes me feel even guiltier I became that but then I realize how they got me out of it. Johanna made me mad.
I don't really know how to make Annie mad, but I can think of one possible thing I can do. She's being so protective of her baby in her stomach right now, just like I was at that horrible meeting with Snow when I was pregnant with Kennie and he confirmed that she would be a tribute in the Games. If he had so much as touched me when I was trying to protect her I don't really know what I would have done. So even though it might be a horrible idea and I might possibly get hurt even if this is just Annie, I decide to do the stupid thing; I pretend to try to grab her hands which are protecting her stomach.
She reacts immediately, pushing me off the cot and making me lose my balance. I fall the three feet to the ground and land on my side with an oomph, but she doesn't attack me further.
"Katniss?" she asks quietly and somehow in shock. I roll over onto my back and it hurts but not too bad. Looking up, I find Annie looking down at me with a surprised expression, clearly confused.
"Sorry, I…well I didn't know how else to get you back." I explain. "I'm not…" Thank god I stopped myself from saying his name, because that very well may have sent her right back into that gone state of mind. "I'm alright." I decide to finish, and she nods in response. She doesn't say anything at all and I wait patiently for her to say something. I know with Annie things can't really be rushed.
"Did you need something?" she asks quietly after a few minutes of silence.
"Not really. I was just coming to see how you were doing." I reply honestly. At least that is the truth and I don't see any harm in telling her that.
"Oh I'm just perfect." She gives me a small smile but I blink in surpise. Did Annie Cresta just make a joke?
"I've never heard you joke before." I comment and she shrugs.
"What else is there to do?" she questions me and it's my turn to shrug. I guess she has a point, it's just…well, I've never seen her be so…normal before. Nor did I ever expect it. But I can't tell her that.
"Complain about it." I suggest and she laughs lightly, unconsciously placing her hands back over her stomach. She isn't really showing yet but it's still the instinct of the thing. I'm guessing that the only reason Coin's going to get away with sending a pregnant girl into battle is because no one can tell yet; the country would probably be in an uproar otherwise.
"Well there's plenty to complain about but I'm not one to complain." Annie tells me and I quirk an eyebrow. It's so different having a real conversation with her. Is this how she is with Finnick when they're alone? Am I just now seeing the real Annie Cresta, the girl before she went crazy because of the Games?
"No, you never seemed like someone who would." I reply.
"You have plenty to complain about though if you want to." She exclaims and I shrug. "Not that it hasn't gotten better with Gale since you are getting along now."
My head snaps up at that and I find Annie looking at me knowingly. "How did you know?" I ask in almost shock. I thought we'd been good about not showing everyone else how we really are. Everyone else seems to believe Gale and I still don't get along. Did Finnick tell her?
A tiny smile plays on her lips and she almost…giggles. "I know more than most people believe, Finn included. I'm far more observant than people realize."
Interesting. I never would have thought of that before coming from her, but I guess in a way it makes sense. I still don't possibly know how she picked up on it though. I'm about to ask when something that sounds like a cannon goes off followed by screams.
"What was that?" I ask aloud, and I get this dreaded feeling inside me even though I know it's stupid. We're not in an arena, it's not a cannon for death. I repeat that to myself until I half believe it. I glance to Annie and find that she's completely gone again, placing her hands on her ears and the faraway look is back.
Oh great, some things never change. The Hunger Games still rule our lives even when we're long out of an arena. A price every Victor has to pay, crazy or no.
Because while you do leave the arena, the arena never leaves you.