Hello! I know, I know. I didn't update as I wished to, but I had no inspiration to finish this now chapter.
Anyway, it's there now, and I hope you will like it as I liked writing it ^^
Please leave me some reviews after having read it :D
Je vous souhaite une agréable lecture / I wish you a nice reading
Previously, on the last chapter...
Matt and Gabby have a conversation about their future, and Matt admitted that he wanted to get through what he was enduring. Kelly came to see Matt for the first time since his release, and reassured Matt about their friendship, after the latter had been aware of what Kelly had gone through after his suicidal attempt.
And now, the next chapter...
Chapter 25: Perfect
Another week had passed. Matt had still trouble facing the situation, he said he was doing better. He sincerely thought he was, but he was unsure about it. Recovering from this gaping wound would take time, he was aware. And to start this healing process, he needed to come back home, to have his daily routine back. To feel as he was before then. With the support of Gabby, Carlos and Elyanor, he decided to go back to Chicago. It had been three weeks he turned around in the cabin, he did liked being there of course, but it urged him to rehash the past, and it wasn't good at all. Three weeks working on a new kitchen counter, creating it, realizing it, and setting it with the help of Carlos and Kelly, who decided to come by every day when off shift, while Gabby and Elyanor devoted to paint it. With the wood finish and the ambiance of the house, and with Kelly's approval as the owner of the cabin, they decided to use natural tone, marbled and unbleached, bringing out all the woody details that Matt had realized. On seeing the masterpiece he had realized, Carlos had entrusted a mission to Matt, which he could start on his return to Chicago; as he wanted everything to be perfect for the arrival of his little boy, he asked if it was possible to create a crib and a rocking chair, which Matt accepted with no hesitation. Indeed, Carlos had understood that working wood with his hands allowed Matt not to think about his trauma and allowed him to freely express his creativity. Working the wood was his new therapy to get better in a sense. The trip seemed shorter than usual, undoubtedly because Gabby and Matt were excited to come back to the city life of Chicago. He asked Gabby if they could possibly stop by the firehouse, knowing that their friends and colleagues were on shift until nine in the morning.
Gabby parked the car and they both went out, meeting first the firemen of the fire Squad. All without exception welcomed them warmly, with friendly tapes in the back and hugs.
"It's good to see you here, Matt", Kelly confessed, whispering in his ear as they embraced.
"I must admit I miss it", he said with a smile. "But... I'm not sure I'm quite ready for that."
"Take the time you need. Your place will always be waiting for you."
"Who's filling as a lieutenant for me?"
"A guy called... Jason Kannell? He pretends to know you, but he never spoke of you."
"Oh dear... Kannell is replacing me!"
Matt couldn't help laughing, to the dismay of the men in front of him and who didn't understand why he had started laughing.
"Kannell and I come from the same neighbourhood, we grew up together. I didn't even know he had become a lieutenant!"
At this point in the conversation, the doors of the firehouse opened and a slew of firefighters left the common room to appear in the apparatus floor.
"I knew I knew that voice!" Herrmann said, very happy to see his lieutenant.
He could not help running towards him and taking him in his arms, which Matt accepted with difficulty and smiled. Sudden gestures could still trigger bad memories, but Matt was more or less able to control them now.
"I'm glad to see you again, Herrmann. And all of you!"
Several accolades later, it remained only the new replacement lieutenant: Kannell. They knew each other by heart, and decided to make everyone believe that they didn't get along at all for a few minutes. They stared at each other, the members of the Squad, who knew that the two apparently knew each other, lost their smile. Yes, they knew each other, but what if they didn't love each other at all? If they hated each other? Not a word came out of the mouths of the firemen and paramedics. But after a while, Matt and Jason couldn't hold back any longer: they burst out laughing, leaving all the firemen incomprehensible. They threw themselves into the other's arms, shouting with joy.
"God, I didn't know you had become a lieutenant!"
"Actually, it's very recent. This is my first fill in this position."
"You're still a floader?"
"Yeah. But it doesn't matter, it allows me to go to different firehouse. I really like it."
The others realized that Kannell knew Casey well, which intrigued them more.
"So you know each other very well", Otis said doubtfully.
"Kannell and I lived in the same neighbourhood during our childhood. Until the family of Kannell moved out to the other side of the city."
"Despite the harshness of our neighborhood, we still managed to get by. We had said we would do it together, but... I'm still glad to see that we're here in the Chicago fire department."
"We could have turned bad, indeed. I'm really happy to see you."
"Me too, man."
"So, if I understand you correctly, you were trouble magnets?" Herrmann said.
"You could say that. Our neighbourhood was not the most hardcore of the city, but there were some dangerous gangs. They tried to engage us more than once, they offered weapons, protection, drugs, all sorts of things, but... We said no every single time. Because we had a dream, and we thought we were going to realize it together. There was an intervention in our classroom to introduce us to their job, and we knew immediately that this was what we had to do to get out of it."
"And then you moved out, and we lost touch."
"Yeah, the separation was terrible. And one day, several years later, I hear that Matthew Casey had been the first in his promotion at the Chicago Fire Academy, and I knew I had to sign to clean up his mess and do better than he did."
"Still, it's always me who has the record, right?"
"Hey!
Kelly jerked right away, pretending that he had the record for the final exam, others listening to their exciting conversation without saying a word.
"I assure you that I have the record! I beat it for a few seconds, I swear!"
"You want to call Chief Tiberg to have your answer?"
"Go ahead! Call him, we'll see who's right!"
Jason Kannell quickly realized that Lieutenant Severide had a very special relationship with his childhood friend, to the point of being a little jealous of him. But Matt had made his life after his move, and it didn't bother him to see that he had made new friends on whom he could rely. Kelly called Chief Tiberg, who laughed in the phone, understanding why two of the best lieutenants in the fire department had called him.
"Seriously?"
"Yes, seriously chief!"
Kelly heard Chief Tiberg muttering in the phone, something like "I swear, these two are not possible", making everyone laugh because Severide had turned on the speaker.
"So I have the record here, and... I do not have the name of the one who holds it, but one thing is certain, it's five minutes and twenty-one seconds."
The two lieutenants looked at each other, stunned. It was not one of their records. Kannell choked a laugh, everyone looking up at the replacement lieutenant.
"I told you I signed up to clean up your mess!"
"T-this is your record?!"
A big giggle arose, none of the members of the firehouse expecting this outcome. Several minutes passed, Kelly had hung up, thanking Chef Tiberg for clarifying a situation, and all returned to the common room. It was soon the end of their shift, Matt and Gabby decided, with the agreement of Chief Boden, to stay until it was finished. To tell the truth, it surprised Matt to see that being here, in his element, he didn't think of all that had happened to him. His friends and colleagues made him forget the tragedy he was overcoming. But still, Matt was afraid. He wanted to have his place back in the fire department, in the firehouse that had seen him grow up, but he was terrified that painful memories could come to the surface during a call. He wanted to come back, but he thought it was too early. Several minutes passed before Matt asked Herrmann and Otis to follow them into the briefing room to talk to them. He needed to do something, and needed their help.
"What's bothering you, Lieutenant?"
"Uh... I would need your help for something."
Curious, Herrmann and Otis stood up, in alert.
"Come on, talk to us."
"I'd like to surprise Gabby tonight at Molly's. And... I would like to know if it is possible to…"
Matt then explained to them all the things he wanted. After about thirty seconds making a monologue interspersed with a nod, the three men began to smile.
"I see. We will organize everything for tonight. But do not come until 9:30, all right?"
"Okay! Thank you guys, that's... It's really important to me."
"No problem."
They then returned to the common room. The shift being over, they changed and went home, promising to go to Molly's tonight.
The evening, just a couple hours after explaining his plan to Herrmann, the latter and Otis contacted him to tell him that everything was ready and that the bar was waiting for him and Gabby. Matt wanted to surprise the woman of his life for several years in the most beautiful way. He wanted to show her how her presence at his side in the darkest moments was the best thing that had happened to him in a very long time. She had been there during her mother's release, also when Hallie had died in a fire. She had been the first to see that his exemplary behavior at the firehouse had been merely a facade, and therefore really helped him to overcome this ordeal. She had helped him when Heather went to jail and had to keep his two godchildren, Ben and Griffin. He had asked for the help of all the firemen in the firehouse, but the one who helped him the most was Gabby. The one who was there now, the one who, despite everything that had happened between them, had always been by his side, it was always Gabby. She had accepted him as he was; broken, to rebuild. He saw only the negative sides, but the woman of his life often reminded him of the list of positive things: for her, Matt was a perfect person. As stubborn as she was, with a joking and serious side at the same time, filled with gentleness and love. And to thank her, he had prepared something secretly, and even Herrmann and Otis wondered while preparing the bar what he was planning. But he wanted to keep the secret until the end and didn't want to say something more. So, in the evening after eating as if nothing had happened, he suggested to Gabby to go out to the bar and ask her if she still could wear the dress she wore the day they really kissed the first time under the porch of her apartment. Not to arouse his curiosity too much, Matt had told her that he loved this dress, and that it was absolutely perfect for her. She went no further, and wanted to please her man, she tried the famous dress. Wanting to be perfect for him, she untied her hair and dropped it on her shoulders, and also applied a layer of carmine lipstick. Thus, she was really like three years ago, when she had decided to go at his house to finally express her feelings. But Matt had been faster, and when she opened her front door, he was there. She remembered this moment, this precise moment when their eyes met, the desire of the other taking place in front of the surprise to see the person loved. Quietly, they made their way to the bar and parked. They then entered Molly's and were welcomed with open arms by the whole team of the firehouse.
"Herrmann?" Why is the karaoke out? It's Thursday, the karaoke night is for tuesday", Gabby wondered.
"Oh, uh... That's... uh..."
"It's me", Casey interrupted. "I asked for that."
Under Gabby's questioning glance, Matt got up and took the direction of the scene, taking the microphone in his hand and turning it on. Everyone turned to him, his colleagues at 51, the many unknowns of the bar, all surprised by the move. He had lost the habit of speaking in front of a team, and even more in front of people he didn't know.
"Uh... As you know, I... run through a rather difficult moment and... And there's a person who has always been there for me... In my moments of doubt, anger, my mourning... All the time. She was by my side from the beginning, and despite everything I could... I could go through, she is still there. And... And I wanted to thank her for that. I spent three weeks away from everyone and everything and learned a lot about myself. And this is a part of what I have learned."
Matt closed his eyes when a soft music began to vibrate the room.
I found a love for me
Darling, just dive right in and follow my lead
Well, I found a girl, beautiful and sweet
Oh, I never knew you were the someone waiting for me
From the first words, the first smiles appeared on certain faces, especially those of Herrmann and Otis. For the others, it was the surprise that dominated. After all, no one had surprised Casey singing before. Gabby too was shocked, filled with emotion, she was beginning to understand why he had asked her to wear this dress in particular. It represented the beginning of their history.
'Cause we were just kids when we fell in love
Not knowing what it was
I will not give you up this time
But Darling, just kiss me slow, your heart is all I own
And in your eyes you're holding mine
Moved, Gabby could not hold back a few tears. It was not, however, tears of sadness, but of happiness. Matt was declaring his unconditional love. He explained to her through this song how much he loved her, he cherished her, but also that he was not going to give up on her.
Baby, I'm dancing in the dark, with you between my arms
Barefoot on the grass, listening to our favorite song
When you said you looked a mess, I whispered underneath my breath
But you heard it, darling, you look perfect tonight
Everyone looked at Gabby, even Otis and Herrmann had not fully understood what their lieutenant wanted to do tonight, but now they knew: he wanted to show Gabby that despite everything that had happened in his life, his love for her had not changed since the beginning of their relationship. It was something so strong that nothing and no one could break that. The song continued, Matt had closed his eyes and saw himself again in the woods, playing music by the lake. This allowed him to express his feelings freely, and that was what he was doing through this song. It was made for Gabby. He wished to assure her that, in spite of the obstacles, he loved her as on the first day; as when she had opened the door in front of him, dressed in the same dress, made up in the same way, with the same hair. That day she had been perfect, and since then nothing had changed. She was still so perfect, he was still in love.
Well, I found a woman, stronger than anyone I know
She shares my dreams, I hope that someday I'll share her home
I found a love, to carry more than just my secrets
To carry love, to carry children of our own
We are still kids, but we're so in love, fighting against all odds
I know we'll be alright this time
Darling, just hold my hand, be my girl I'll be your man
I see my future in your eyes
Baby, I'm dancing in the dark, with you between my arms
Barefoot on the grass, listening to our favorite song
When I saw you in that dress, looking so beautiful
I don't deserve this, darling, you look perfect tonight
An instrumental interlude came to cut the song. It was brief but long enough for Matt to open his eyes and contemplate the scene for a few seconds. People had stopped their discussions, their gaze turned towards the little scene that Otis and Herrmann had set up at the back of the bar. All seemed surprised to see an introverted person like Casey open up to the world through a song. This made him smile, and as he was about to start singing again, he closed his eyes again, contemplating inwardly every line, every curve of Gabby. He then put all his energy, all his love for the end of this song, so that the woman he loved understood that he was still crazy in love with her.
Baby, I'm dancing in the dark, with you between my arms
Barefoot on the grass, listening to our favorite song
I have faith in what I see
Now I know I have met an angel in person
And she looks perfect
I don't deserve this; you look perfect tonight
The music stopped, not a sound interrupted the silence in the room. Astonished, Matt opened his eyes, and realized that what he had just done had amazed the whole room. He then looked at Gabby, who was the first to move; she jumped from her stool, rushing to the stage to embrace Matt, big tears rolling on her icy cheeks.
"I love you too, Matt. I love you more than anything in the world. I love you so much...", she confessed, tightening her embrace.
It was only at that very moment that the crowd gathered began to applaud the performance, sometimes even to whistle with happiness. Everyone was conquered, and no one knew that Matt had such a talent. Enjoying that moment, Matt and Gabby headed back to the bar under a thunder of applause and friendly paces.
"Hey, lieutenant! You hid this from us all this time!"
"I didn't know that I was able to do it until very recently", he admitted.
"Yeah?"
"Mh. I learned that when... During my days with Dr. Charles."
Everyone understood that the subject was still a little taboo and too recent for Matt, and no one went further. What he had to know was simply: that he had discovered his gift for music shortly after the tragic events that have led him so far. Everyone decided to consume his drink almost silently. The couple formed by Matt and Gabby kissed, glad to not think about all they had experienced and suffered over the few weeks that had just passed. Casey smiled at her, contemplating her as on the first day; with desire, with passion and with love.
"I made a decision. I no longer have to hide behind... Behind my fears and my anguish. I have to face them."
Matt took a deep breath, Gabby and his friends looking at him trying to figure out what he meant by that.
"I'm going to go to trial. I have to testify."
Moved, Matt held back a few tears, supported by all his colleagues and the woman of his life. He had to face his demons. He had to do it to get better, he had to face this woman who had lost so much.
"Matt, baby. We will do it. We will face it together", Gabby assured, the other firemen nodding as a support to their lieutenant.
What will happen next :I think I will do an ellipse in time, come back two months later for this famous trial.
A/U: The song sang by Matt Casey is Perfect from Ed Sheeran. I thought it was the perfect song for our Dawsey couple ^^