Requested by Robin Rokossovsky: Can you write a kind of AU story, where the reader works along with Hank and Connor for awhile, but then one day, a terrible accident happened to the reader and damages her gravely. As she is dying, Connor decides to transfer her conscience ( soul?) into an android body so she could live . ( kind of like the Avatar movie you know ? ) And after "waking her up",he would turns her into a deviant. Finally, if you could include a scene similar to Markus when he touches North's hand to reveal his feelings for her.
Y'ALL I WAS SUPER EXCITED ABOUT THIS PROMPT! I hope you enjoy this despite the quite angsty side of it. I promise you it's not chapter 14 levels of angst though :')
Warnings: Brief mention of suicide relating to unnamed character(s). Also this chapter kinda revolves around the reader having a sort of existential crisis, so bare that in mind lovelies.
Transference
/Commencing startup...
/3… 2… 1…
Model RP100
#202-514-320
/Status: Fully Operational
/Initialising…
/Awaiting response…
/Awaiting response…
/Wake_Up_Protocol_Confirmed/
/All_Systems_Running/
What?
You became suddenly aware of the weird chunks of letters and numbers filling your vision - all of which meant absolutely nothing to you except for a few gaps in the text that displayed your name - then again, you didn't exactly seem to have any vision at that moment. It was all white characters in front of a pitch black background, a mystifying sight that should have immediately alarmed you, but didn't; while you weren't promptly thrown into the unpleasant hold of a panic attack, there was something - a feeling in your chest that you couldn't quite place, but you decided to identify it as dread nonetheless.
Why?
You felt almost as though you were floating. There was a distinct lack of feeling all over your body that made you want to jolt and reach out, as if to grab hold of something and steady yourself to make sure you weren't actually drifting away in a dark void of Matrix-style lettering… but you couldn't move.
Or maybe you were moving, and you just couldn't feel it.
What's going on?
Confusion gripped you. Your memory was fuzzy, the last thing you remembered was sitting at your desk at the precinct, reading over some files on your terminal while Connor leaned over you and lectured you on merits of getting enough sleep - that's right, it had been late in the evening. You weren't supposed to stay so late for your shift, but you'd wanted to finish a report so that you didn't have to come in so early the next morning. Had you fallen asleep at the desk and found yourself in a nasty little nightmare?
Your 'vision' changed, the blocks of small text diminishing at once to give you a clear view of some words that you did understand.
Welcome, _
/Please wait while your processor loads…
/Progress bar settings and instructions can be accessed below.
There were two options available, one of which read 'Show settings' and the other, 'Instructions'. You stared back and forth between the choices, wondering what to do with this information - how were you supposed to select either of them? You couldn't move your hands, so tapping either option was out of the question.
Everything felt… off.
You glared at the 'Show settings' button, willing it to activate - and just like that, it did.
Time Remaining: 00:01:32
Progress bar: 98.95% complete.
Start Time: 2:18:54 PM
Estimated End Time: 4:06:24 PM
What the fuck is going on?
You turned your attention to the 'Instructions' option, once again giving it a good hard stare and wishing for it to activate, only for it to highlight and reveal your only instruction as 'be patient'.
Was this some kind of sick joke?
There was absolutely nothing you could do, except wait. The proceeding minute seemed to go by at a snail's pace as you stared at the countdown timer like it was your enemy.
The display timer hit zero, and the oddly detached sensation of dread in your chest fizzled out when you blinked your eyes open, revealing a too-white room that should have made your eyes sting, but didn't.
Statistics lit up in your peripheral, telling you things that you did not know the meaning of, but you strained to look past it, inclining your head up to gaze around the room - it was a lab, a Cyberlife lab, full of gadgets and gizmos and high-tech machinery. But the lab elements were not the subject of your abrupt concern, no, it was the man standing to your right, peering down at you with an inquisitive stare that filled you with sudden perturbation.
Elijah Kamski, thankfully dressed in more than just a bathrobe this time, was hovering over you, seemingly leering with an intent you could not decipher - but it was Kamski, so it couldn't have been anything irreproachable.
You lashed out before another second could pass - or you would have, had it not been for the fact that you were strapped down to the surface you were lying upon; the realisation made you shriek and struggle, the shrill note of your voice sounding loudly in your ears, "Get the fuck away from me!" Something pulsed strongly in your chest - you thought it may have been your heart, but it felt different somehow. It seemed to resonate throughout your entire body in a way that you weren't at all familiar with.
/Warning: Stress Level 77%^^
Damn fucking right it is. The digits steadily climbed further, appearing urgent in your vision, which only made it rise faster, and you blinked hard, trying to make the warning disappear; you jolted as the Cyberlife founder took a step closer to the table, glancing at one of the monitors hanging above, paying your furious shouts no heed, before he turned his head and addressed somebody outside of your peripheral.
"You should probably calm them before they figure out a way to self-destruct."
His words baffled you further, a surreal sort of fear settling in, and you quickly grew terrified that the man had done something awful to you. The terror seemed to paralyse you, your stress level jumping to ninety-four percent in a heartbeat, and you found that although your mind was reeling with panic, you continued to breath at a slightly elevated but still regular pace. There was no dizziness or hyperventilation, just distress - an uncomfortable heat growing in your chest and spreading out - and an unrest brought on by loneliness.
You wanted it to stop - you wanted to go back to sleep, to make Kamski and his lab disappear; you wanted to find some semblance of familiarity in this hellish nightmare, something - anything - to latch onto for reassurance.
Connor.
Connor was there. His hands cupping your face - warm and tender hands, a soft pressure that made the stress metre pause in it's ascent - his thumbs running over your cheeks as he stared at you, eyes wide and glossy. His expression looked to be filled with relief and there was a subtle tremor in his light hold, his fingertips touching your skin as if for the first time in his life.
"It's okay, I'm here. You're okay, you're alive. Just relax, it'll be alright." He spoke in a whisper, lips parted with what appeared to be awe; he trailed his index finger up, around your eye and gently over your eyebrow, tracing the skin of your forehead before reaching your hairline where his digits extended and drew tenderly through your tresses.
The android's loving caresses soothed you, making you feel safeguarded against anything Elijah Kamski could potentially do to you - Connor wouldn't let the man harm you. He would protect you. But still, you felt unnerved in your vulnerable position, bound to a lab table with a worrying gap in your memories, and the fact that Connor was not rushing to free you seemed quite offbeat.
Connor appeared slightly put off by your silence as you stared at him with wide, questioning eyes, and he threw Kamski a glance across the table before facing you again, "How do you feel? Do... do you recognise me, love?" his voice was filled with uncertainty, and his words left you disconcerted.
You nodded, turning your head into the palm of his hand for more comfort, "Of course. But, I- I feel strange", you breathed. You couldn't explain exactly what it was that made you feel unpleasantly peculiar - it was no one thing, everything felt as though it had been turned on its head, "Connor, I'm- I'm scared. I don't know what's going on. I-I don't… I'm scared, please help me", you implored, giving the straps around your wrist another experimental tug.
Connor's eyes widened a fraction, gaze flickering to the side of your forehead briefly, and he turned to give Kamski a pointed look, "Can we release them now?"
Elijah looked skeptical, "You should explain the situation first. Once their stress levels lower, you may release them."
You didn't like the apprehensive look that stretched over Connor's face, "They don't remember what happened?" Your anxiety spiked, as did your irritation - you couldn't stand being talked about like you weren't lying right there, and in the state of disorder you were in; you needed Connor to look at you and talk to you.
"I thought it best to omit the details of everything that happened from a short while before the accident occurred. It could have caused more harm than good", the Cyberlife founder spoke, his words nothing but more pieces to an impossible puzzle.
"Connor", your voice quivered, "What's he talking about? What accident?"
The android looked a little lost for a moment, staring into your eyes with an agitated expression before he attempted to compose himself, "There was… a car crash. It was- it was bad", Connor murmured, his eyes flitting over your face in an antsy sort of way - you didn't like how inarticulate the android seemed, it was unlike him, "You… you weren't going to make it."
You had trouble comprehending his words, mostly because a swift glance over your body revealed you to appear completely unharmed - upon closer look, you realised you were dressed in Cyberlife issued underwear and a shirt that barely covered your stomach.
"I- I don't…" you blinked irritably, trying to rid yourself of the warnings flickering in your sight as if they were persistent insects buzzing around your face, "I need… get me out… get me out."
"Shh", Connor hushed you softly, "You need to relax", he told you gently, speaking your name in a mollifying way, but you refused to settle and accept the android's words - this was fucking insane. You wanted to go home, to the precinct, to Hank's house, anywhere but Cyberlife - you wanted to be somewhere known.
"Your body was critically injured… but your brain was still well intact. We were able to… to transfer your memories, behavioural patterns, and thought processes to an artificial body, and… and you're alive", Connor's eyes were glossy again, but you were too shocked to even acknowledge that - it felt as though everything in your body juddered and then promptly began running at double the speed it had been.
/Warning: Stress Level 100%^^^
The stress metre that had been declining oh-so-gradually suddenly shot up and reached its apex, the foreground of your vision suddenly flashing red, crowded and cluttered with error error error and there was nothing you could do except wish for it all to just stop.
"Stop. Stop, just stop", you heard a highly discomfiting static noise in your ears and realised it was your voice. Everything was hot. Too hot. TOO HOT. ERROR ERROR ERROR.
Amidst the turmoil attacking your senses, you heard Connor say your name, taking your face in his hands to draw your gaze towards him, and in his eyes you saw all manner of emotions - pain, sorrow, overpowering concern.
He said your name again, and you forced yourself to listen to him.
"I know you're scared, just try to relax. If you continue like this, you'll overheat. Please, just relax, my love."
His soft-spoken words made you irrationally angry - the idea that you could simply just calm down after being told that you were now an android caused fury to bubble up inside you. You felt trapped, desperate to get up and move away from Elijah Kamski, who was still slinking back and forth to your right, observing meaningless statistics on viewing screens.
"Let me go", you murmured, and then repeated yourself with more bite in your words, "Let me go!" Matching your shout with a futile tug on the secure ties was enough for Connor to realise you wouldn't be so easily pacified, and the android let out a forlorn sigh, his expression wholly apologetic and filled with guilt.
Connor glanced towards Kamski and the man interpreted his look almost immediately, shaking his head in a very mechanical way, "That would be unwise, Connor. Androids are unpredictable when their stress levels are this high, you know that." You felt dehumanised by his cautionary statement, which only served to make you more angry.
Your android lover looked back to you, his gaze searching, and you squinted through the mass of word jumble in your vision to try and discern his microexpressions - he wasn't seriously going to take Kamski's advice and keep you tied down, was he? The thought made you upset and your eyes grew bleary in response.
"Connor", you whimpered, "Please. Just release these straps, please."
His LED was cycling yellow as he pondered his choices; the longer he hesitated, the more tears dripped from your eyes, running down either sides of your face - your incredulity was palpable, how could Connor stand there and be content to let you feel imprisoned?
It was several moments too long before Connor straightened up, turning his attention to the monitor closest to him - he pressed his hand against it, the skin receding to show the white structure of his plastic skeleton below, and he interfaced with the machine, overriding it to activate the release on the binds around your wrists and ankles. As soon as you registered the sound of the unfastening click, you pulled your hands from the straps, subconsciously wringing your wrists as you expected them to be sore - but they weren't.
You sat up at once, swinging your legs over the side to slip off the surface and stand, taking a few stumbling steps away from the table - you were still having trouble seeing anything with all the galling warnings and alerts flickering before your eyes - and Connor's arms encircled around you, holding you steady and tight against his chest.
In any other situation, you may have welcomed his encompassing embrace and even returned it enthusiastically, but everything still felt wrong. You were afraid of this change, you were angry and upset, you needed space to breathe despite the fact that, now that you were an android, you had no requirement for oxygen.
"No", you said firmly, trying to step out of his hold, but he simply secured his arms even more tightly around you, your name falling from his lips in a worried, questioning tone. "No", you repeated, squirming away from him, "Get off of me."
Connor eventually got the message, loosening his arms, a hurt look on his face. When you stepped away from him, he tried to reach for you again, but you batted his hands away, shaking your head rigidly, "Stay away, I don't- I don't want anyone near me. Just stay away", you held your hand up in warning, flinching when the android spoke your name woundedly.
You floundered slightly in your backwards step, and once again Connor ignored your wishes, approaching you in order to aid your balance.
/Warning: Overheat imminent. Please initiate cooldown protocol.
/Warning: Excessively elevated stress level may cause system malfunctions.
/Warning: Processing error. Please reboot systems.
/Awaiting response…
/Awaiting response…
/Awaiting response…
The urgent, flashing red messages in your eyes made you want to scream - you shoved Connor away, staggering backwards until your back hit the wall, and sunk down against it, your hands covering your face in an attempt to make the onslaught of notifications stop; they did not end, they just kept coming. It was too flashy, too loud - you needed a way to escape - the enclosing blackness you had experienced before opening your eyes was preferable to this nightmare.
"Chloe, will you please minimise their head-up display?" Kamski's voice drifted from across the room.
You peered through the gap in your fingers, looking past Connor who was knelt at your level a few metres away from you, his LED still yellow and his face more than miserable, to see Chloe begin to move towards you after speaking a swift, 'Of course, Mr Kamski.'
She had been so quiet, you hadn't noticed her presence until now. As she approached, you grew more anxious, but she proceeded more slowly than Connor had, offering you a placating, warm smile that led you to believe she meant absolutely no harm whatsoever.
/Stress Level: 98%
You remained rigidly still as she knelt down beside you and reached out her hand, subtly wincing as she pressed her fingers to the right side of your forehead. Moments later, the frenetic display before your eyes disappeared completely, your shaky inhales pausing in surprise at the sudden peace that was bestowed upon you.
/Stress Level: 88%
You blinked your eyes, the stress metre pop-up disappearing only a moment after becoming visible. This was better, this was- manageable. You felt more at ease now that your eyes weren't filled to the brim with important alerts that you had no idea what to do with.
Wiping your face, you glanced up at Chloe, "...thank you." She smiled in response, nodding her head in acknowledgement of your gratitude, and took a prudent step back to give you the space you needed.
You breathed, noting that your stress level was slowly beginning its descent, and you blessedly felt a tad calmer.
Everybody in the room was still staring at you, however. Each of the three other occupants of the lab pinned you with varying looks - Chloe looked sympathetic whereas Kamski looked at you curiously as though you were nothing more than an intriguing experiment. Connor gazed at you with pain in his eyes, with desperation and a distinct lack of understanding - he couldn't understand what you were feeling right now, the sheer disbelief of your situation, and the fear that came with it. Connor had been an android his whole life, how could he even begin to understand?
The silence of the room was incredibly uncomfortable. "Stop looking at me", you snapped at them all, but only Chloe and Connor did as you asked, lowering their gazes to the floor while Kamski scratched at his chin, his seemingly unblinking gaze never wandering from your form.
You felt terribly exposed, especially given your state of undress.
With sudden, jerky movements, you pushed yourself to your feet to stand, "I- I need to… go to the restroom", you stated, fists clenching by your sides. It was more than obvious that you didn't need to use the restroom, as you were an android now, but if Kamski refused to let you leave the lab, you were going to throw something at him.
There was a lull in the air, unsettling and flustering, and you shifted from foot to foot, waiting for what felt like an insurmountable amount of time before the Cyberlife founder nodded his head and addressed Chloe once again, "Chloe, could you show them the way to the restroom?"
Chloe nodded her head, "Yes, Mr. Kamski."
She motioned the lab exit with her hand and you scrambled to follow her, moving past Connor who remained knelt on the floor, staring pointedly at his hands, waves of dejection rolling off of him, and you trailed out of the door.
"I did warn you, Connor", Kamski spoke after several long moments, "Of all the times this procedure has been attempted, only thirty-two percent reports a successful transition."
Connor's fists clenched against his thighs, "It was successful. They're alive, they have their memories, it worked-"
"Did it?" Kamski spoke. "Sixty-two percent of the failed cases were reported as such because the patient committed suicide within the first week."
Connor's thirium pump juddered with distress, "That's… that's not going to happen", he uttered through gritted teeth.
You pressed your back to the door of the restroom, staring across at the vacant stalls, sinks and the mirror across the length of the wall with apprehension. You'd locked the door behind you after finding that it was empty, but you were pretty sure Chloe could override it if she needed to - you appreciated that she allowed you to enter the room alone, perhaps understanding that you were frightened and in need of some private time to think.
The mirror filled you with trepidation. You didn't want to approach it, but and the same time, you needed to see yourself. You paced slowly towards the centre of the restroom, purposely turning away to avoid the image of your reflection, and paid close attention to the way your legs moved - your movements were so human-like, still so clumsy and unlike that of any android you had ever seen. It felt normal to move your limbs around, as though there was still a skeleton made of bones inside your body, surrounded by flesh and muscle, but you knew it wasn't so, and it was mind-boggling.
You ran your fingers lightly up your forearm.
You felt the soft pressure, but you couldn't feel the tickle that came with touching your skin so faintly - were you going to be deprived of this kind of sensation forever?
The urge to turn your head and glance into the mirror was pressing, and you plucked up the courage, forcing yourself to look before you could decide not to, and you froze at the sight that greeted you.
You looked like you.
Everything about your body looked exactly the same; the precise shade of your hair, the hue of your eyes, the shape of your nose and mouth, the subtle moles and marks on your skin that you were born with - everything looked perfect.
You looked like you, but you did not feel like you.
On the side of your head was a blue, cycling LED, embedded inconspicuously into your skin; you ran your fingers over it and shuddered unpleasantly as you picked up on the difference of material between your synthetic skin and the little ring of light. It had never bothered you to look at Connor's LED - it never stood out and reminded you that Connor was not human, it was never a problem when it was Connor's LED, but right now, it made you feel like a bizarre thing. It screamed deafeningly, you are not human, you will never be human again, and once more you felt the resonating thrum of what had to be your thirium pump beating harshly in your chest, pushing that sense of dread up and high into your throat.
Your LED flashed red. Was this what a panic attack felt like for androids?
/Warning: Stress Level 92%^^
With no understanding of how to calm yourself down, you simply covered the LED with your hand, hoping it would take your mind away from the cold truth of what you were.
"I'll remove it for you." You recoiled back at the sudden sound of Connor's voice permeating your auditory components, and turned to find him by the door, shutting it gently behind him with his eyes affixed on you, "If you want me to." You'd been so caught up in your anxious state that you hadn't registered the android unlocking and opening the door.
You stared at him, not knowing what to say to the android you had been in love with for years, but your mind still thrummed with pain - emotional pain, not physical pain… androids don't feel pain - and you let your anger show on your face as Connor stepped closer.
"Why won't you just leave me alone?" You needed to be by yourself to think everything over, Connor's presence only made it harder to think.
Connor stilled, lips pursing to hide that your words hurt him, "You shouldn't have to go through this alone", he explained softly.
"I shouldn't have to go through this, full-fucking-stop!" You yelled back, pointing your hands at your chest, "I'm- I'm not… what have you done to me!?"
Connor's lips parted, startled by the fury behind your outburst, "You… you were going to die, I had to save you somehow… this was the only way", he stammered, "We simply transferred your consciousness into a more durable body so that you can continue to live - what is it that you're so… so angry about?"
Your android lover didn't understand - he couldn't understand. He could never understand - everything worked differently with androids - how were you ever going to explain to him why you were so freaked out?
Presumably, your original human body had perished, which meant that you - as you had been then - were dead. The original, real you was dead. They had taken your memories and implanted them in an android body - the body you were inhabiting now - and tried to tell you that you were still the same person, but you weren't. The real you was dead, and you were made after the fact. You were a clone, a copy, an android built to think it was you.
You could barely process the thought yourself, let alone explain it to another android.
"Where's my body?" You asked shakily instead of answering his question, "My real body- human body?" You could see the faint glow of red at the very edge of your vision from where your LED was desperately flashing with distress.
Connor shook his head, lips trembling as he rushed for the right response, "That… that doesn't matter. You're here and you're alive", he proclaimed, a delicate plead of your name falling from his lips.
"No", you took a step back, "No, Connor… I'm dead. The real me is dead - the one you loved is dead. I'm not… really me", you accompanied your words by jabbing yourself in the chest, watching as Connor's face creased with torment as you spoke, "You can't love me, you loved them… they're gone."
Connor advanced forward suddenly, protests spilling from his mouth as he tried to grab your arm, but your new android reflexes seemed to come in handy - you evaded him and hastily locked yourself in one of the stalls, pressing your back against it for extra measure.
"Open the door", Connor begged, "Please open the door!" He banged his hand against it, repeating himself over and over, till he was practically shouting, and you pressed your hands over your ears, wishing you knew how to disable your auditory components.
"Why did you do this? Why didn't you just let me die?" You cried, cutting off his violent raps against the stall, and he fell quiet. Without seeing his face, you couldn't tell whether he was stunned, processing, incredulous or all three.
"I- I couldn't…" There was a break in his voice, a slight fizzle of static that meant the emotions he was experiencing were almost overwhelming, "I couldn't do that! I… I love you, I couldn't watch you go…" his words tapered off to a pained whisper, followed by a sharp, quivering inhale.
"It wasn't your choice to make, Connor. I didn't want to die, but I didn't want to be brought back like this."
"Please, I- I'm sorry! I'm so sorry. It was a selfish thing for me to do, but I need you- please… I need you." His voice was wracked with despair, crackling and hissing with interjections of static that only made him sound more despondent.
You did not respond, feeling more artificial tears spring from your eyes without the accompanying harsh breaths and sinus build-up that came when you cried as a human - yet another reminder that you were a copy. An imitation, both flawed and flawless at once.
Connor fell silent too, and for precisely three minutes and nineteen seconds - the timer displayed in the corner of your vision - nobody spoke a word. The quiet, once peaceful and welcoming, felt chilling.
When the android on the other side of the stall door finally spoke, it made you jump slightly, "You've told me many times that you think I have more humanity in me than a lot of humans you've known." The statement was simply, a fact, and you grit your teeth, realising immediately where he was going with his remark. "Were you being truthful when you told me that?" His voice sounded calm now - he'd taken three minutes to compose himself and he'd drawn every ounce of tranquil confidence from within his body and put it into his words, effectively coming across as clear and precise.
You drew in a soft breath, glancing down at your feet, "Yes. Of course", you whispered in response to his question.
"Then why is it different now that it's you?" Connor enquired.
"I...I-" You failed to construct a sound argument.
"Why do you suddenly feel that your humanity - everything that makes you, you - is gone? Just because your consciousness has been transferred to a body made of plastic and metal instead of flesh and bones?"
He had you. Connor had successfully pacified himself, pulled himself away from the frantic panic he exuded and instead put his logical, analytical thoughts into action - he knew you wouldn't deny the humanity you saw in android-kind, and it highlighted the hypocrisy of your beliefs in yourself.
Again, you didn't speak.
"Come out", Connor spoke softly, "I can show you now", he breathed your name like you were the only thing that mattered to him, "I can interface with you and show you what you need to understand."
You sighed, eyes falling to your right hand, inspecting it closely, floored to find that every crease in your palm was still exactly as you remembered it. "I… I don't know", you admitted in a hushed voice, afraid of what it would feel like.
"Please. Trust me." He implored, and you shut your eyes, taking another long, deep breath that you didn't truly need.
"...Okay. But… can you step away from the door?" You felt trapped enough as it was, you needed Connor to understand that being smothered would do anything but help you.
Almost immediately, you heard Connor take several steps back, giving you plenty of room to leave the stall at your own pace; you waited several seconds, swallowing the anxiety that gripped your biocomponents - you weren't sure you'd ever get used to the fact that your organs were all fabricated.
Your fingers hesitated on the lock, but you forced yourself to unlatch it, pulling the door open to reveal Connor standing across the room. As soon as you left the stall, he held out his hand and waited, allowing you to come to him.
You stared at his hand, full of uncertainty - it was a hand you had held many times before, a hand you had welcomed to touch of, so why was this time any different?
Steeling yourself, you approached the android, reaching unhurriedly to clasp and interlock your fingers with his own, but when your hand hovered above his and the skin on both your hands peeled back to reveal the white chassis below, you recoiled. Connor anticipated your reaction, lurching to grab a hold of your wrist before you could pull away entirely, and all at once the connection was made.
Your body was flooded with a feeling you could not identify - you weren't sure you had ever felt it as a human, but you were sure of one thing - it was good, pleasant, safe and encompassing, and following it was a rush of tender adoration and affection. You felt how much Connor cherished you and cared about you, and you felt how much he loved you, because it was everything you felt for him, yet somehow amplified. You felt everything at once - warm, soft, good, nice, love, kind, sweet, always, forever - and it managed to leave you breathless.
/Stress Level: 57%
He loved you, he would always love you, regardless of whether your body was organic or synthetic, and you believed him without question. There were no lies through this connection, no deceit, just the truth.
You hardly realised when you slumped against him or when the two of you fell to your knees together, secure in a lover's embrace, hands interlocked. "Yes", Connor whispered into your ear as you nuzzled your nose against his shoulder, "Now you know how I feel about you… you know why I had to- to do what I did." There was sorrow flooding the connection, and you wrapped your arm around the android more tightly - you felt the pain of his imminent loss following the car accident, the tiny morsel of hope that he could save your life, and finally, the regret over the pain he had caused you because of his decision.
"I… I understand, Connor", you reassured him. Communication seemed so much easier when your emotions were physically connected and flooding through the same mind.
You were immersed in relief, and you realised it was Connor who was feeling it.
/Stress Level: 32%
You pulled back slightly to inspect the android's face and were shocked to see tears streaming from his eyes; he must have felt your inquisitiveness over the connection you had, because he answered your unasked question. "Our link travels both ways. I can feel your sorrow and fear… and I understand your anger. You think you're some sort of imposter, that everyone at the precinct will hate you because you aren't the real you. You're worried that one day I'll realise this and stop loving you, leaving you alone in a world you're unfamiliar with, but… that's never going to happen. I understand your doubts but believe me when I say you are you. You are alive, and I love you."
You were crying again too, the both of you staring at each other with bleary eyes.
"I'll never leave you", Connor promised, "I won't let you feel alone. I'm going to help you", a rare smile flickered over his lips, "I'll... teach you how to be an android."
You felt your lips quirk up in response, gazing into Connor's sweet brown eyes, this time with a brand new perspective. You'd never had one-hundred percent perfect vision as a human, but as an android, your optic components worked flawlessly, and as you inspected Connor's face, you found that there were many tiny details you had never noticed before. It was as if your vision was a million times more clear; you could see how smooth his skin really was, each individual freckle and mole - you could probably accurately count them now, if you wanted to - and the thing that left you awestruck was the android's irises.
The brown of his eyes was hardly one solid colour. His irises were composed of a multitude of brown hues, but now you could see so perfectly the flecks of orange in the lighter sections, and the way the colour curved into the black of his pupil. It looked like a warm nebula.
You'd never noticed before. What else could you discover about your lover now that you too were an android?
"Okay… okay." You whispered, nodding your head, the look of awe still fresh on your face, and Connor sunk against you, his lips brushing yours as a torrent of love cascaded through you once again. It was a good thing you were knelt on the ground, because the feeling alone may have knocked you off your feet otherwise.
/Stress Level: 0%
With Connor's help, you could get through this. You had no doubts.
/New Objective: Be yourself.
Notes: How's it feel to be an android, everybody?
So I really love Kamski but I gotta keep him creepy as heck, staying true to the character :') I feel like reader would still have a grudge from the time he tried to get Connor to shoot Chloe :')
Please leave me a comment my sweet cupcakes! Love you all :)
There may be a longer gap between now and the next chapter because I wanna try and get more of a chapter for my other fic written ;) Then I'll come straight back to this, of course!