Ski74, I think I've figured out your question, and this chapter pretty much answers that for you. :)
anyways, please enjoy. :) i've decided that i'm not gonna ask for reviews anymore. chapters will come as i write them. reviews, though, are greatly appreciated, but they are your choice. i'm not gonna force it, ya know?
the most important thing is that you enjoy what you're reading. sure, reviewing does help me know what i'm doing right, what i'm doing wrong, but i am not requiring them anymore. :) thank you for sticking with me for so long. Torn is, I think, coming to an end, and trust me when I say you're in for a surprise. A few surprises, actually. haha.
read and enjoy! :)
20. It's Time: Imagine Dragons
21. First Time: Lifehouse
22. Feels Like Tonight: Daughtry
23. Haunted: Taylor Swift
24. Gravity: Sara Bareilles
25. All About Us: He Is We feat. Owl City
Despite Edward's constant protests, I was up and getting ready for school Monday. I didn't feel great, but I had felt worse before.
My stomach was already growing some more. I even felt the baby moving inside of me, which scared everyone. Rose, however, found it fascinating, and she was always so thrilled to feel it.
I had to wear baggy clothes, of course, or anything that didn't show my slightly protruding stomach. Really, I didn't care if people thought I was pregnant, but they couldn't see the quick progression my pregnancy was taking. If this was indeed happening quickly, who knows when I'll have the baby?
Angela saw me glowing and was glowing herself. "How was the honeymoon? I don't mean details because trust me, Mayze, I don't need those."
I laughed. "Well, it was actually lots of fun. The cabin was beautiful."
That was another thing. We decided to not tell anyone we came home early because it was just easier that way.
"I'm glad your dad finally got over that rough patch of pneumonia," she told me. "He seemed to be feeling a lot better at the wedding, and he went back to work over the break."
I nodded. "He's so glad, too. Very glad to be back into the normal swing of things."
She looked over at Bella with a smile. "Were you behind the decorating?"
Bella, though very worried, actually smiled at her and shook her head. "That was all Alice. I think Rose helped some, too, but that was her."
Angela then turned to Alice, who was laughing, and smiled. "You did amazing."
Alice was beaming at her. "Thanks."
Edward knew he had to pretend to be happy, so of course he was smiling down at me. "You alright?"
"Fine," I assured him. Luckily for me, I didn't have to pretend anything. I was genuinely happy. "Remind me when we get home. I need to call Brynk, Karma, Sapphire, and Oliver."
He nodded. "I will. Leah and Brady were told not to say anything until the tests Carlisle ran came back, mostly because I think Sam wanted you to tell them. He's . . . very livid."
I made a face. "I don't care what he says."
"You should," he disagreed. "Mayze . . . this is serious stuff. No one knows what this thin—it is gonna be. There's too much uncertainty."
I sighed. "Maybe, but it doesn't change things."
He slowly shook his head. "Have you ever thought, for just one second, about what this could do to me?"
"I think about it all the time," I said quietly, eyes moving over to Angela to make sure she and Alice were still talking about the ceremony and reception. When I realized they were just now starting the reception talk, I knew it was okay. "Will you promise me something?"
"I don't know," he murmured. "Depends. You may be asking something I can't promise."
I scowled. "Fine. Will you please, if what you're afraid of does happen—not saying it will because, quite frankly, I don't think it will—take care of it for me? Stay alive and love it with all your heart."
"Yeah, you were definitely asking something I can't promise," he groaned. "Mayze, I can't. What if . . . what if it's not even mine?"
"It's still mine," I reminded him.
He sighed. "I don't think I can, Mayze."
I frowned. "We'll talk later."
He just rolled his eyes. "Won't change anything."
"Will you please just be happy?" I asked curiously, giving him a loving smile that always cheered him up. "You don't know this isn't gonna turn out for the better. When I'm right and it does, you owe me."
"Okay, deal," he said quietly, and to my surprise, he laughed. "I'll give you whatever you want. Everything has to turn out for the better in my opinion, though."
I grinned. "Deal."
Bella sighed. "Mayze, reconsidered? Even after Mom called you last night?"
I shook my head. "Nope. Nothing will change my mind."
She scowled. "I was afraid of that."
"You'll love it," I promised her.
Her eyes began filling with tears. "But will you still be here to love it, too?"
I was grinning madly as I nodded. "Of course I will."
Edward shook his head. "You're counting too much on the venom. It doesn't always work. Sometimes, people in normal situations don't even make it, much less what you're putting yourself through."
I shrugged. "I didn't say I needed it. What if I don't?"
His eyebrows rose dubiously. "That's your plan? Make it through all of this and still somehow be able to remain human?"
I nodded. "Precisely. And, if that doesn't work, the venom's always an option."
"Absolutely idiotic," he muttered under his breath. "I cannot even begin to fathom what goes on in that head of yours."
I smirked. "No one can."
From that first day back, things went about the same. I only lasted a week at school, though, and even that was pushing it. By a week, I looked six months pregnant, so it was time to stop school. I looked awful my last day, so people began wondering if I was really sick. I was losing a lot of weight, besides the protruding stomach, and my skin was really pale—more than normal. When I walked into my last period Friday, the teacher told Edward to take me home immediately.
That's why it was easy for Carlisle to say that I had the flu. If necessary, we would also add that it turned into pneumonia. Angela tried to stop by and see how I was, but they warned her I was very contagious and didn't need to be seen. Really, I wasn't wearing a sweatshirt and was instead walking around with a huge belly and a t-shirt on. Now, all I could fit into comfortably was Emmett's.
Rosalie was constantly by my side, as was Edward. Bella, when she could be there, was there, as was Charlie and Renée. Ember came by as well, and of course, it wasn't long before all of the Denalis were here.
To tell you the truth, I think there was something going on between Tanya and Charlie. It was hard to tell because they didn't show anything around me, but I don't know. I guess only time would tell.
Embry, Seth, and Jacob were here a lot, too. Sometimes, Jacob and Edward would leave to talk about something they didn't want me to hear, and they both refused to explain when they got back. From the looks on Embry, Ember, and Seth's faces . . . it wasn't good.
The week went by slowly. Edward tried to stay home, but for the sake of keeping up appearances, he had to go. He absolutely hated it, but it was what he had to do.
It always killed him when he left and came back to find me worse off than before. Still, he kept his spirits up and tried to be as optimistic about this whole situation as I was.
To my surprise, when we were laying in bed one night, he actually whispered, "Mayze . . . if this child is mine . . . I promise I'll take care of it and love it forever."
"And if it's not?" I asked quietly, voice shaky and raspy. I was growing weaker and weaker, and we were only a week and a half in.
"I'll find it a good home," he promised me. "I'll find someone to take good care of it."
At that point, I knew there was no changing his mind. If it was his baby, he wouldn't kill himself if I died. If it wasn't, he would find it a good home and then kill himself. There was really no way to change that, so instead, I snuggled into his arms and let him hold me.
Death, though it seemed almost imminent, didn't scare me. A part of me knew I would have to be changed, and a part of me kept hoping that I could fight this out, that I could have this child. Even as it constantly kicked my ribs, my stomach, and left bruises all over my body, even breaking a few ribs, I never gave up that hope.
Edward then cheered up, a lot. He was smiling a lot, being his normal self. Even when he saw the state I was in, he kept his mood optimistic and assured anyone who showed doubt that I would be okay.
I don't know what changed his mind, but it made me so happy that I cried a little.
One night, when I couldn't sleep due to the little feet kicking at my rib cage, I felt Edward's presence beside me. It made my heart begin to race immediately, though I was a little surprised. He had been talking to Carlisle while the two hunted together, so I didn't expect him to be back so soon.
Yet here he was, tenderly kissing down my neck, whispering how much he loved me.
I couldn't help but smile as my eyes began to flutter shut. "Hi there."
"Hello, yourself," he murmured. "Can I steal you away for a minute?"
"To do what exactly?"
He didn't answer but instead began helping me sit up. I didn't realize that Rose was even in here until he turned me towards the door, where she was eyeing him skeptically.
"What are you doing?" she asked.
"She may not have much longer as a human, and I want to make her final days the best they can be," he said softly, surprisingly calm despite Rose's skepticism.
Rose then let us pass, and Edward carefully helped me move downstairs. I think they were planning on moving me downstairs anyways so that it was easier on me to get around, but for now, I was still in our room.
As soon as we got downstairs, I was surprised to find it lit up by candles with music softly playing in the background. It was empty, and as Rose followed us down, she was quick to disappear just like everyone else had.
I didn't know what to say, but when his lips softly came down to meet mine, I realized that I didn't have to say anything. All I had to do was hold onto him and kiss him as much as I could.
The faster my heart beat, the more the baby kicked. I hated it, but I had to pull away from him in order to breathe.
He seemed to feel it, and he even placed his hands on my stomach gently. "Shh. Let your mommy breathe."
"It can't understand you," I laughed quietly.
To my surprise, though, it stopped kicking.
He smirked down at me. "Maybe it can."
"I feel bad calling the baby 'it,'" I admitted sheepishly. "I say it's going to be a girl."
"What if it's a boy?" he asked curiously, cocking an eyebrow at me as he smiled. "I say it'll be a boy."
"Well, if it's a boy, we'll name him Elliot Jembreth, and if it's a girl, we'll name her Elliora Rosabellice," I said lightly.
He seemed surprised by the names, especially the middle names, but I guess he wasn't surprised to find that I had thought this through. "Do I get no say?"
"If you would like one, sure," I agreed. "What do you want to name them?"
"I think those names are . . . perfect," he said lightly, eyes lighting up as my smile did. Then, he did something very surprising as well. He, very quickly, left my side to change the song. Before I could even realize he was gone, though, he was back holding me.
The song . . . it was one I recognized, a song I didn't even realize he knew existed. It was on my playlist, sure, but I didn't know he even paid attention to it anymore.
All About Us by He Is We featuring Owl City was such a good song. Also romantic and great for dancing to.
That's exactly what he had in mind, too. Very careful, he held his hand out to me for me to take.
Of course, I did. It was hard to stand, though, so he gently picked me up so that I could step on his feet and let him completely lead the dance.
I wasn't as close to him as I normally was due to the large bump on my stomach, but I was as close as I could be. He could feel the baby moving as vividly as I could, so this moment was absolutely perfect.
I even sang along quietly, which he loved even more.
The song came to an end, unfortunately, but as soon as it did, his lips captured mine again in a sweet, loving embrace. Strangely enough, the baby didn't fight and instead let this happen.
And it was absolutely incredible.