Hey all, here is the next one-shot. This one is going to have two parts...and It's also going to be the last one-shot for this piece of work. I published my first one-shot in March because I was bored and it turned into something else entirely. I have loved writing out these one-shots for you all and I can honestly say that they got better towards the end (I hope you agree with me). If an idea ever pops into my head for a one-shot I'll write it down and maybe publish another one-shot for this piece. I have two other stories going right now and I want to focus on those a little more.

This is based on the months where Dean is in hell. Now, this two-part one-shot is definitely the most "subject sensitive" piece I have ever written. I will put a warning on both parts, but the worst of it doesn't start until part two.

I hope you enjoy and please remember to review. Happy reading.

All rights go to the owners of Supernatural, except for my original character.

No Light at the End of the Tunnel: Part I

Warning: Alcohol and (eventual) drug usage

Proceed with caution

It had been three months.

A long, grueling, heart-rending three months since her brother had met the end of the line. In a way, Alex constantly felt that the whole situation was her fault. If she could have just managed to pay attention to her surroundings, she wouldn't have died, Dean wouldn't have sold his soul and he would still be alive. He would still be breathing, next to his little sister.

Every day was just like the last. Alex woke up from her usual few hours of fitful sleep, showered, drank coffee as if her life depended on it, ate minimal amounts of food and threw back shots like it was nobody's business. When she looked at herself in the mirror, she saw a lost cause. A lost cause who didn't deserve to be alive, who should've been able to rescue the one person who had done the same thing for her so many times before. Her own reflection brought up buried self-hatred and her blood boiled every time she saw her eyes, her own familiar pair of green eyes.

After one particular rough hunt, Alex was driving back to her motel when she drove past a small bar. She slowed down, making an illegal U-turn, even though other cars were coming her way. They honked at her and naturally, Alex didn't give a damn. The car pulled into the dirt parking lot, rolling into a free parking space. Alex never dared to put the Impala next to other cars if she could help it. It could get scratched or dented and Alex didn't have the heart to let that happen. Alex kept her safe, it was the least she felt like she could do.

Stepping out from the car, Alex inhaled the air that smelled faintly of manure. She wrinkled her nose, instantly regretting her decision. Closing the door gently, she started walking towards the bar named Davey's. The girl didn't bother with the way she looked. She knew her clothes were a mess and overall, she just didn't care what others might think. If they had something to say to her or about her, she would deal with it when the time came. The door to the bar was completely made of wood. The white paint was chipping away, making it look beyond its days. The door creaked as she entered the establishment. A few rouge eyes went to her as she slowly walked in, eventually minding their own business. The lighting was dark and soft music was playing from the jukebox in the back by the pool table. Alex grabbed a stool at the bar. glancing at the options of alcohol to choose from.

"How can I help you?" the bartender asked, an older woman who was drying a glass.

Alex thought for a moment, her mouth turning as her mind wandered. "Uh…give me anything that'll burn when it goes down my throat." she smirked, internally laughing at her own pain.

The bartender regarded her for a moment. "I need to see some ID, honey."

"Of course…" Alex groaned, grabbing her wallet from her jacket pocket. She pulled out her real ID, the one with her legal name and her real age. She only carried fakes when she was pretending to be some sort of government official or whatever the job required that day/ The bartender studied the ID, her eyes going from the card to Alex. When the bartender nodded, handing back the card to Alex, she took out one glass and poured a double of Jack.

"Here you go." the woman simply said.

"…thanks." Alex replied, nonchalant. She smelled the liquid first, swashing it around the glass. It didn't take her but two generous gulps before the serving was gone. The glass hit the counter, a little harder than she intended it to. The girl sat there, thinking about nothing and worrying about everything. She pulled out her cellphone, though she didn't know why. Nobody was going to call her and she wasn't planning on making any outgoing calls anytime soon. The phone slipped back into her jean pocket and she sat in her own silent misery. Then, something caught her attention: the music playing in the background. Alex turned her head towards the sound, listening closely. The tune was too easy to identify as it hit her ears.

Now, I'm goin' to Rosedale, Take my rider by my side

Still, barrelhouse, if it's on the riverside, yeah

I know my baby, Lord, I said, "Is really sloppy drunk."

I know my mama, Lord, a brown skin, but she ain't no plum

"You've got to be fucking kidding me…" Alex grumbled. Out of all the songs in the world, it just had to be Zeppelin's Traveling Riverside Blues. Alex sloppily let her head fall onto the counter, her forehead meeting the hard, sticky surface. After a minute, she pulled herself back up, flagging down the bartender. "Can I get another, please?" Her tone wasn't filled with upset, it was more liked she was…just done.

Done with everything.

"You ain't lookin' to good, sweetheart." a male voice said from her left side.

"Sweetheart? What the fuck?" Alex thought to herself. She ignored the guy, focusing on her second helping of amber liquid that was handed to her.

"Oh, so it's like that then, huh?"

Alex was annoyed already. She turned her body, glaring hard at the guy next to her, even though she noticed her was mildly attractive. "Can I help you?"

The guy shrugged. "Don't know. But you're lookin' like you could use a pick me up." There was a small smirk on his face.

Holding up her glass of Jack, Alex gave the guy a fake smile. She drank it down again, three gulps this time instead of two. It satisfied the burning feeling she wished for as it ran into her body. Cringing just a tad, Alex placed down the now empty glass on the counter. "I think I'm good, thanks."

The guy watched her for a moment. He extended his hand, "I'm Dylan." he introduced himself.

Alex looked down at his callused hand, then moved her eyes back to his. Did she want to be an utter bitch or should she be kind for a change? Slowly, Alex let her hand reach out, taking Dylan's hand in her own, shaking it. Her mind spit out the first name it could think of. "I'm Lexie." she lied. Though, in her mind, she wasn't necessarily lying. "Lexie" wasn't too far from her real name and nobody had every called her that in her life, but he didn't need to know that.

Dylan gave her a smile. "Well, what brings you to this neck of the woods?" he questioned, drinking his beer.

Alex shrugged, running a hand through her hair. "Just visiting some family."

"You look like hell. Is that blood on your clothes?"

Alex scoffed, narrowing her eyes at the brave soul who had approached her and was now insulting her. Looking down at her clothes, she noticed just how bas she was. Her clothes were covered in dirt and dried blood. It was splattered on her jeans and rested on her t-shirt. Alex remembered the small band-aid she had to put over a small cut above her eyebrow and she was sure her hair was nappy. Okay, maybe the guy had a point. "It's not like I came here trying to impress anybody."

"Oh, ouch, girl."

Alex rolled her eyes. "Is this what you do all day? Come to the bar, drink and try to hit on girls? Or guys, I don't judge." Alex claimed, holding her hands up in surrender.

Dylan only laughed, finishing off his beer. "Okay, I get it. You just looked like you could use a friend."

"I have plenty of friends." What a huge lie that was.

"Anyway, you, uh, stayin' in town for a while or what?"

"Why?"

Dylan huffed out a laugh. "Listen," he began, scooting his stool closer to Alex. "I usually don't do this, but there's a party at a buddy's house of mine. They can get pretty wild and like I said, you're lookin' like you could use a pick me up.'

I could be a serial killer for all you know." In a way, Alex was positive that she was, in fact, a serial killer.

"I'll take my chances."

Was this guy serious? Alex stared at the man in front of her for a moment. He didn't look that much older than her and she considered telling him to screw off. Instead, the words rolled right off of her tongue, as if she wasn't in control. "Where's this 'pretty wild party'?"

Dylan's eyes grew wide and a smile reached his ears. He nodded happily, getting his phone out his pocket. "Alright, alright. Give me your number and I'll text you the address later."

Grabbing the phone, Alex punched in her real number into Dylan's phone. Once it was done, she handed it back, her face stoic.

"I guess I'll be seein' you later…Lexie." Dylan walked away, leaving the bar. That left Alex to come to terms with what she had just gotten herself into.

What could possibly go wrong, right?

And if I stay here with you girl

Things just couldn't even be the same

Cause I'm as free as a bird now

And this bird you cannot change

Alex sat at the bar, listening to the music in the generally quiet background. Was she actually going to go through with this? Who knows what kind of things could happen at a stupid house party. She had her fair share in college, but that experience didn't last too long.

The bartender approached Alex, leaning down on the counter in front of her. "Be careful, honey. That was Dylan Richards. He don't have the rep he does around here for being a saint."

Alex locked eyes with the woman. She nodded her head in understanding, but that doesn't mean she was listening. "Good to know."

Thanks for reading and please remember to review! I would really appreciate it. Also, check out my other Supernatural work(s): The Unforeseeable Life of Alexandra Winchester

If you like Criminal Minds, check out my new and improved version of my story: Not Like This