I stood just outside his door trying to get my bearings. The tightness in my chest was returning but I didn't know why, all I wanted was on the other side of this door but I couldn't make myself open it. It was like all the time apart and all the pain I'd been through was weighing down on me at once in this moment. Jacob was somehow all I needed and the only thing left that I was afraid of.

I steadied myself against the wall, listening to my breath and knowing that it was flowing with the same rhythm as his. I closed my eyes and felt my pulse, knowing that his heart beat to the same rhythm.

"Bella" the low rough voice I loved said from the doorway.

I opened my eyes and looked up at him, seeing him completely for the first time. No matter how much I had thought I had loved Jacob before this moment it didn't compare to what I felt now. Looking at him the tightness in my chest swelled and overwhelmed me. The depth of my love for him flowed out of me, more then one person, one body could possibly contain. I could see the goodness in him, the strength and love radiated from his features as if he had a visible aura.

"Babe?" he said softly, his dark eyes begging me to answer him. He didn't move, needing me to cross the expanse and show him that I was really here. We stood silently in the narrow hallway readjusting to being together. The heat of his skin reached out and licked at my clothes, pulling me to him. I stepped forward without thinking, the need to touch him the only thought on my mind.

"Jake…" I whispered as I came close looking up at his tall frame. I reached up to his face and cupped his cheek pulling him down to me. He placed a soft kiss on my lips before inhaling deeply and wrapping his arms roughly around me.

"You're ok?" he breathed into my hair.

"Yeah, I am" my hands held on to his shoulders as if he might disappear if I stopped touching him.

"You're really here?"

"Jake" I pulled away slightly so that I could look at him "I'm here, I'm not going anywhere, I promise, I'm not going away." My hands kneaded the back of his neck as I kissed him then with the full force of how much I had missed him.

In a flash I was against the wall, my back pressed into the sheetrock and my feet off the ground. His tongue was in my mouth as he pulled my legs up around him.

"Bells" he moaned as he licked at my lips, his hands roaming my body quickly as if he were trying to memorize every inch.

"Qwoli…" my head fell back as his lips moved to my neck. His kisses were unrestrained and passionate but never rough. He kissed me and pushed his body against mine with so much love I could never doubt that what he needed from me was so much more then physical.

"I love you" one of us whispered as he returned to my lips and began to move his hips against me, the hardness of his erection pushing against me.

"Are you, is this ok?" he asked suddenly remembering that I had recently been through hell…again.

"Yes" I smiled and pushed him away. Standing on my own two feed again I placed my hands on his chest. "Jake, don't push me away again ok? I'm here; I'm here as long as you'll keep me. I can't take anymore of all this…bullshit."

He pulled me against his chest, hugging me tightly "I won't…I promise, I won't. Bells I'm never letting go of you again. Charlie's going to be lucky if I even let you go home tonight!"

I chuckled into his chest and slipped my hands under the back of his tee-shirt, needing to feel his skin. I ran my hands up his strong back, feeling the thick cords of muscle along either side of his spine. He shivered as I let my nails drag down his skin softly.

"Bells…" he moaned against the top of my head as his arms relaxed around me and his hands moved lower down my hips. "I have missed you so much."

We moved into his room and sat on the bed. He looked at me for a long time, but instead of becoming the self-conscious girl I usually was I sat calmly, letting him see me. He picked up my hand and brought my wrist to his mouth. Kissing my tattoo he inhaled deeply and smiled beneath hooded eyes.

"It really is beautiful" he said, kissing my wrist again, and then the palm of my hand before placing it on his chest, over his heart. "Like you."

While one hand held mine against him the other came up to my face and traced the now permanent lines on my face. "I'm sorry…I should have been there" he whispered.

"No" leaning my cheek into his touch I closed my eyes and told him all of the truths I had learned while I was away from him. That I was incomplete before, that I couldn't have been his mate that I wasn't a whole person on my own. I told him about the tattoo and about my sisters. I told him about my pain.

"I never…" he began and I opened my eyes.

"It's not about you Jake. All of this, this was about me, about me becoming the person I needed to be, and…the person you needed me to be. I could have never been yours, not really without this."

"It's just, so awful. I hate that that leech hurt you!" his anger and pain intermingled in the air around us.

"But I'm ok, and…Jake, I wasn't alone. You were there with me. Us…our…whatever we are was there with me. And the thunderbird."

"What?"

"She was there. She…helped me…I don't know how to explain it but" I pulled my hand away from his skin and turned my wrist over and saw the thunderbird curled in on itself on my wrist. You would think she was asleep except for the satisfied grin on her face. "Somehow she's part of me now and she gave me the strength to kill Victoria, to come back to you. That's all we wanted. Qwoli, all we wanted was to be here with you!"

"When did you start calling me that?" Jake's face was suddenly serious.

"What? Oh, I don't know."

"Do you know what that word means, did you like, look it up or something?"

"No…I…that's just who you are" I knew the name was Jake's it was him as much a Jacob or Alpha or Mate.

"Bells, that's the Quileute word for wolf, but…used as a name…it's the name of the Wolf Spirit that gives us our form, it's a really powerful name, we usually only use it when someone is pulling on the spirit world for wisdom or strength."

"The pack called you Qwoli today…have they ever done that before?"

"No…I hadn't noticed."

"That's because it's who you are! It's…Jake; remember you told me some people had more wolf in them then others, that the blood lines or what not were stronger with some of you."

"Yeah"

"I don't know what it is, but that's who you are. Jake, your eyes…it's got have something to do with that…With you being Alpha"

"Bella, that doesn't make any sense. I mean, I'm not the Alpha."

"No?" I asked, knowing that he was.

"No…I'm not mated." He looked away from me then, suddenly shy about bringing that up.

"Yes you are." I reached out to him, pulling myself closer to him and throwing my legs over his. "Look at me" his eyes lifted up and met him, the glint of gold sparkling in his chocolate eyes. "Do you doubt it? I don't."

"But we haven't…"

"Jake, do you really think I'm not marked? Do you really think I'm not yours?" his fingers stroked my wrist, feeling the scar behind the tattoo. He leaned in and kissed me and the electric pulse that always coursed through me when we touched made me gasp with the intensity of it. His lips were soft as he kissed my mouth before moving to my face and kissing the marks on my cheek. I was marked, marked for everyone to see.

"This is where she scratched you" he breathed.

"When I found the strength to come back to you…"

"Q'wakili put something on them…" he continued.

"…to mark me…"

He kissed me again, his mouth warm as I slid my tongue between his lips. The pleasure that ran through my body at the taste of him made me shake slightly with needing more. Always more.

"Jake…" I sighed pulling away from him and taking off the shirt he had covered me with this morning. Leaning over me Jake positioned us back on his bed, his weight on his elbow he continued to kiss me with methodical slowness as his other hand ran along my side, feeling every rib, every pore with his fingers until finally he palmed my breast making me arch up against him.

He moaned as he lowered his weight onto me, allowing his erection to find me. As his skin came into contact with mine, my mouth latched onto his shoulder, tasting the dark saltiness of his skin. I chewed on his shoulder as my hands roamed his back, feeling the strength and power under his skin as he moved himself against me.

"God" I moaned sitting up slightly, making him pull back from me.

"What? Babe, are you ok?" the worry in his face was so sincere, so sweet.

"Yes! God! Jake! Just…take of your pants!" He balked, shocked at my words before he roared with laughter. His deep voice filled with joy. With a smile he stood up and undressed, never taking his eyes from mine. I shimmied out of the dirty jeans I was still wearing and laid back on his bed.

His smile was dark and his eyes were overtaken with the yellow that I had come to love. "T'ist'ilal" he growled as he crawled over me.

"Qwoli" I moaned without though as I reached up to him and pulled his body down against mine.

"I love you…forever…without thought." He looked down at me with such intensity that for a moment I forgot to breathe. The soft light filtering in on us from the window outlined his body making it look like his skin was glowing.

"I love you" I said holding his gaze "I always have, always will, till the end of time."

I pulled my knees up around him, opening myself to him, letting him know I was ready. Without breaking the connection flowing between us as we looked into each other he moved slightly and slid himself slowly into me.

Gasping with the joy of having him inside of me a tear escaped from my eyes. I lifted my hips, bringing him deeper into me. This was the moment, the moment you can't go back from. Whatever we had been, whatever we were together or apart making love this morning was solidifying everything we already knew to be true. My hands held onto his strong back as my head fell back. His kisses against my neck sent slivers of sensation down my body, meeting at the place where he moved inside of me.

Behind my eyes I could see my thunderbird dancing in the sky, eyes shining like the sun. She swayed in the air enjoying the feeling of the wind under her wings. Jake and I moved together, meeting each other's desires before the other had a chance to want something. Our bodies and souls merging.

I opened my eyes and brought my hands to Jake's pecs as he moved above me with more force pushing us further into oblivion. I was moaning and calling out to him but couldn't hear myself. All I was aware of was the growing growl coming from the man above me. He moved faster inside of me, deeper still, pushing against the end of me, I could feel him in my womb, in my heart, in my toes.

"Fuck…" I moaned as I clutched at his ass, pulling at him and lifting myself against his body. "Fuck Jake!"

We rolled slightly to the side as my body torqued away from the intense pleasure he was filling me with.

"Bella, my Bells, fuck, you're, fuck…" he grasped my hips and thrust up into me, making me scream with the shock of feeling him so deep.

Pulling him back onto me, I wrapped my legs around his hips and held on; I was outside of myself and could watch as we moved together, our heat bringing us up to new heights. I needed something, something more. I felt I was headed toward black out. The light behind my eyes blazed and blinded me to everything but Jake's skin; my hands, my mouth, my cunt, my nails every part of me searched for more of him.

As he ground against me moving his hips at impossible new angles his hands wrapped under me, pulling us closer together. My lips met his shoulder and I felt my teeth graze his skin as he began to moan and grunt in rhythm with our movements.

"Qwoli!" a voice that wasn't mine called out as he slammed into me and held still, deep in me, the throbbing of my insides clenching and pulling at him as he roared. Suddenly my teeth sunk into his skin and I felt as the soft flesh of his shoulder gave way to me.

I bit down with force as my hips slammed up against his still form demanding release. He shook and pulled away from my latch on him slightly before slamming into me one, two, three more times, making us both scream and wail with the intensity of our final release.

As we lay together, chests heaving, Jacob kissed my shoulder, licked at my neck, rubbed my hips, he couldn't stay still or keep his hands off of me. Behind my eyes the light flickered before blinding me with its intensity. As it faded I could see the thunderbird again.

She swooped in the air drifting slowly down to a field where she met a large red wolf standing atop a boulder. She landing on the ground and placed her large head against the wolf's side. I felt the crushing depth of her pain. "Someday…" I heard the voice within me that wasn't mine say…

"We'll be together…" Jake whispered above me. His eyes flashing white as I looked up to him.

I stroked his face allowing the ancient love that we were connected to to flow between us. His smile was sad with knowledge and yearning as he looked down at me before kissing me slowly. When he finally broke away his eyes were normal again and the ache of sadness that had overcome me was gone.

"Jake?" I asked.

"T'ist'ilal…Bella…" I smiled at him knowing that he had felt what I had and that within us now was not only our love, but the love of the spirits we were connected to who through us had finally be able to be together.

"I love you…" I said running my hands across his shoulder.

"I know." He smiled his playful Jake smile "You marked me!" he looked over at his shoulder where the bit was already healed but a small scar had been left behind.

"I guess I did!" I laughed. He pulled out of me, leaving an emptiness behind that would remain until we were together again.

"I don't think it's supposed to work that way." He teased. "I mean I'm the Alpha right?"

"Oh…taking the mantle already are we? I guess you want to run off to your pack?" rolling onto my side I propped myself on my shoulder and looked down at his beautiful body.

"Hmmm…not quite yet." He closed his eyes and sighed deeply, contentment rolling off of him.

"I bet I can guess what you need." I smiled, trailing my nails over his chest, unable to keep from touching his skin.

"Oh really?" he opened his eyes a slit and raised an eyebrow.

"Definitely….lunch." I kissed him quickly and stood up "Come on, I'll make you your 3lbs of meat and if you're good I'll let you eat it on a plate instead of a bowl in the yard."

"Bells…" he said, suddenly serious again.

"What?" I smiled, not picking up on the change in his mood as I slipped on a pair of his boxers I found on the floor.

"Did it hurt?"

"What? Being with you? No! Not at all, I wasn't really a virgin anymore you know." I teased turning back to him, his face a serious and hard as he looked at me.

"What?" I asked.

"I'm glad but that's not what I meant." He pulled himself up to a sitting position and slid his legs off of the bed. His hand reached out to me and I was pulled to his invitation like a magnet to its mate. His touch pulled me down to his lap and he turned me away from him so that he could finally inspect the healed burns on my back.

A muted growl escaped his throat as he traced one of them with his finger. I pulled away from his touch instinctively, the sensitive skin shocked by the sensation of his touch.

"Do the hurt?"

"No, they're just…sensitive."

He leaned forward and kissed one of them, sending electric shocks through my body at the amplification of his touch.

"I know what you said, and I understand but…" he leaned his forehead against my back and sighed deeply, his breath across the scars soft and warm. "I just hate it…that you were hurt…I can't imagine what would make marks like this."

"Don't…don't imagine it." I turned and looked down at his tearful eyes. "Let's get lunch, let's go see Sam and maybe…I don't know…rent a movie or something and just be together tonight ok?"

"How can you just let it go? Be Ok?"

"Because I'm with you, I'm where I'm meant to be and I know who I am and what I want and for the first time in my entire life I'm completely at peace with that. I love you Jacob Black, my Qwoli, my Pup…I love you and nothing else matters so please, let's just get up huh?"

His smile was resigned but there was a determination in his eyes that was new. This was a part of it I knew, a part of why I had to get hurt was to teach him the importance of his role, as Alpha I wasn't the only one he needed to protect and the weight of that responsibility to weigh heavy on him. To be a good leader it would have to. I watched as he aged before me, the pride and conviction necessary for a good leader solidifying in his features.

I was proud of him, I was proud of me. We had come through this, we'd learned the things we were intended to learn and we'd become the people we needed to be. Now we just had to learn how to be these people while still being us. I smiled down at him and kissed his forehead.

"I love you…so much…come on." I stood up and threw on one of his shirts and walked to the door. I could feel him watching me and the further away from him I got the feeling of incompleteness returned. "Come on, get dressed." I said back to him before going out to the kitchen and hunting in the refrigerator for some lunch.

"So woman, what are you feeding me?" A smiling Jacob said wrapping his arms around my waist and kissing my neck.

"Woman?" I raised an eyebrow as I turned in his arms.

"Girl?" he smiled impishly.

"Dog." I punched him lightly so I didn't hurt myself and pulled away from him. "There is NOTHING to eat in here."

"I know, I haven't been doing a good job keeping up with taking care of Dad and the pack and everything else." He leaned against the counter.

"Looks like you might need the help of a woman." I teased.

"No, Bells, I don't expect you to do that."

"Really? You don't think you could use some help with your Dad and the pack? You think maybe having me as a mate meant we were going to just go to the movies and have sex every other Thursday?"

"I was hoping for more like every Thursday…" he smiled down at me.

"I want more then that…" I touched him again. "I don't know how I'm even going to stand to be away from you for a night, let alone all day."

"I feel the same way Bells." He sighed pulling me to him and resting his chin on my head. The easy sway of our bodies standing together came like a warm breeze. "We'll figure it all out, we don't have to today, but we will. Maybe, I don't know, we should really get married so your Dad understands what we are…"

I scoffed before realizing what I had done, my instinctual reaction to marriage rearing its head.

"Fuck Bells, that was harsh." He said dropping his hands.

"Sorry…" I said looking up at him "I just, I'm not that girl you know? The girl who gets married while she's still in high school."

"You're not?" he asked raising an eyebrow.

"Crap. I am aren't I?" I said stepping back away from him and sitting at the kitchen table.

"Yup" contentment radiated from Jacob.

"When did that happen?"

"Bells…umm…remember when you BIT me?" he laughed coming over to sit on the table next to me.

"Yeah" I smiled despite myself because despite what my brain was telling me, the rest of me was happy.

"So, you see we're already married and my Dad and the pack know it, it's only fair to let your Dad know."

"Can we just tell him we eloped?"

"Sure, if you want, but I don't think he'd be very happy about it…" he looked up into the air and we were quiet for a few minutes thinking about what/if all of this would mean in the real world.

"Ok…" I began and his eyes came down to me with eagerness. "Wait…if we're going to do this, and I'm not completely sure we are, but if we do we have to do it right ok? You have to like go talk to Charlie because he'd get a big kick out of that or maybe he'll shoot you…"

"Really?" he interrupted hopping off of the table. "You aren't going to like totally change your mind and freak out are you?"

"I didn't say yes" I scolded with a smile, knowing that in reality I had.

"Ok…no…you totally did…ok…wait here!" Jacob ran off back into the house stumbling over his feet as he went, making me laugh at how clumsy he could be when he was excited.

The phone rang while he was out of the room and I answered in quickly.

"Black Residence"

"Bella?" a familiar voice said from the other end.

"Yes…"

"Hey, uhh it's Sam."

"Oh hi!"

"Hey"

"You want Jake? He'll be right back."

"No that's, I can just tell you, um Emily was thinking we should all get together you know celebrate tonight."

"Celebrate?" I asked.

"Yeah, you being ok and you and Jake… and Jake being Alpha now." Sam said quickly.

"Oh…"

"So you should come over when Jake comes by later and Em can loan you some clothes if you don't have any and we can all I don't know do the bonfire thing or something."

"Sam? You ok?"

"Yeah, yeah, I'm great."

"Are you sure? You sound…strained."

"I'm just anxious to talk to Jake, you know, clear everything out, no biggie."

"Ok…"

"Really Bella, I'm good. And I'm really happy for you."

"Thanks, I am too" I smiled into the air.

"Who's that?" Jake asked from behind me, making me squeal and jump at the unexpected sound.

"Scaredy-Cat." He joked.

"Big Bad Wolf" I turned and thrust the phone in his chest. "Sam."

"Hey Sam…yeah…yeah…oh cool…yeah that'd be great…no, ah…I think we're gonna run by her place now and then we'll come over if that's cool…yeah…ha, exactly…no brother, we're cool…we'll work it all out, I'm not stressing it…yeah, that sounds good…thanks…I appreciate you doing that…ok….talk to you later."

"So we're going to my place?" I asked as soon as he hung up.

"Yup."

"Why?"

"You know why"

"Today? Really? Jake…" I whined.

"Yes, today." He smiled leaving no room for argument. "Come on Bells, let's get you home so you can throw some clothes on. Charlie isn't going to be happy with you wearing that."

"Let me throw my jeans back on."

"Your ripped bloody jeans? I don't think that would impress him either." He smiled snaking his arm around my waist. "So, you wanna take the car or the bike?" he looked down at my bare feet and smiled.

"How about we run?"

"Really?"

"Yeah, I haven't seen Pup in a while at least not when we're happy."

Jake practically started vibrating in the living room as his wolf begged to get out to see me. "Ok, you carry my clothes so I'm presentable when we see Charlie?"

"Sure" I smiled as he stripped in the living room, again tripping over his own feet in his haste. "Be careful with this" he said handing me a wooden box that had been in his pocket.

"What is it?" I scowled at him.

"You know what it is, just shut up and don't open it" he smiled pulling his underwear off and bouncing out into the yard. "Come on!" he called while I found a canvas bag to shove his clothes into.

Outside Pup was waiting for me, prancing back and forth in the yard. "Yip!" he called when he saw me and came bounding over to me.

"Hi Baby!" I said wrapping my arms around his neck.

He nuzzled in to me before pulling back and licking my face.

"God, I hate it when you do that." I laughed and Pup smiled his big goofy smile.

"I know it's just you in there Jake, but I feel like I haven't seen you in forever. I'm so happy to see you!"

"Yip!" he said backing away from me and bringing his nose to my cheek. I kissed his muzzle and scratched his face eliciting and purr of pleasure from the giant wolf I loved.

"Are you ready to go?"

"Yip!"

"You're very proud of yourself aren't you, getting me to go along with all of this."

"Yip!" he smiled his wide toothy grin, tongue lolling out to the side.

"I love you" I laughed before walking around to his side and using his fur to climb up on his back when he lay down. "Giddy-up" I called down to him and kicked his ribs with my heels. I could practically feel Jake rolling his eyes and then we were speeding through the woods, my hands dug deep into his fur, my hair swept back by the movement of the air, my joy overtaking me as I leg myself go into the exhilaration of running with Pup and feeling his strength beneath me. For a moment I was able to forget where we were going, and what Jake was going to talk to Charlie about…