WHY I'M SO STUPID?

Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto.

Hey everyone, here is the latest chapter for this fic. Sorry it took so long to update, as I told you before I have been going through college, and just finished a semester as a college junior. Had to take at least one junior–level English courses since I'm a Creative Writing, and one of them I had to write a ten-page assignment for. Anybody that has been through this knows the burnout that tends to follow writing one.

Also bought a Nintendo Switch, and one of the games I am still trying to get through is Legend of Zelda: Breath of the Wild. Talk about your long games.

Here is some truth that needs to be told, but when it comes to adding things from the canon, I have no clue what to use, so feel to free to suggest what to throw in, along with what could be changed. Also, from Gaiden and onward, I don't bother keeping track, mainly because I'm just not interested in it.

Anyway, on with the story.

Konoha-Council Chambers

It has been two weeks since the ex-Elders of Konoha have made their escape, and by now the general populace already heard the news, the same way they heard about Naruto's burden. Apparently somebody was hoping to stir some unrest in the populace, trying to reignite the hatred for Naruto that used to be strong in the past, but backfired big time. This person turned out to be one of the jonin that helped them escape.

The only ones who took the bait are the ones who refuse to believe that they were wrong for so long, or those who have been sucking up to the Yondaime's son while refusing to acknowledge Naruto as his own person. Apparently the numbers were against them this time around because there are people who took the chance to get to know the real Naruto, and are willing to admit that they were beyond wrong for how they treated him.

Yet this jonin made his final mistake when he tried to attack one Karin Uzumaki, when she was on her way to a lunch date with Sasuke. It started by calling her a demon whore, since she is related to Naruto, and even accused her of trying to rape Sasuke. While the guy thought that she would be weak since she is a medic-nin that didn't go through the same kind of training Sakura, Karin ended up proving him wrong by turning his nuts into butter with a mean kick to the crotch.

Before the crowd can get vengeance for the man's dignity, this was when the newly established Konoha Police Force jumped in, with a little ANBU back up. With a threat of being sent to jail, along with a session at T&I, out of a group of twenty, only two got to join the jonin gripping his groin in jail.

So right now, there is a council meeting that also includes the attendance of Naruto, Itachi, and Kisame, as well as a pretty sore Jiraiya, in order to fix whatever flaws that the traitors might exploit. But the first question came from Itachi, "Naruto, do you know where Sasuke is?" He asked, since he figured his little brother would want to be here to help with the planning.

"Oh last time I seen him, Karin was dragging him back to her place." Naruto said, like it was just an everyday thing, "I guess he finally decided to give into certain urges. So you probably won't see him again for about a couple of days."

Itach gave a small nod, especially after hearing scuttlebutt about how the Hokage's wife placed him in the hospital for sexual based injuries, "So I guess I'll have the compound to myself while Sasuke spends about a week at the hospital." He said.

One of the Civilian Councilor spoke up, one of the more sensible replacements, "Aren't you over exaggerating on what is about to happen to Sasuke?"

Hiashi answered for this one, "Actually they are sugarcoating it, since Uzumakis have a strong sex drive." He said, getting wide eyes from those who never heard much about the Uzumaki Clan, "Minato found that out first hand with Kushina, that he spent about a week in the hospital for a broken pelvis."

"So he is the first man to go to the hospital because of sex?" Another civilian asked, being skeptical that such a thing was possible.

"Actually he would be the second, considering how the Shodaime had his own experiences with his wife." Tsunade said, getting a lot of surprised looks from both sides, although the shinobi never considered the fact that Mito Uzumaki could have done something similar to Hashirama, "I can always recall how Granny Mito would help my grandfather with his morning wood, only to make it snap like a twig before noon."

This caused every male in the room to cover their parts after being told that. Deciding to change topics, "We are here to discuss what needs to be done in the future." Shikaku said, wanting to get to the reason why this meeting was called. Usually he would say 'troublesome' but what he just heard wouldn't do the word justice.

Konoha-Elsewhere

At a local coffee shop, most of the girls, consisting of Ino, Hinata, Kin, Tenten and the recently added Temari, are waiting for the arrival of Sakura and Karin. They were just having some small talk when a bow legged Sakura made her entrance, "Good morning everyone." She said, while she took her seat. Although when her butt made contact with the chair, she gave off a slight moan, due to her still being tender in that area.

While the rest of the girls were smiling, Ino decided to speak out, "So forehead, I take it your first week living in Naruto's house was eventful?" She asked, while wiggling her eyebrows.

Sakura gave a blush at that, not just at the memories, but also her body recalling the experience. For you see, after their little chat at the Hokage's office, she and Ino ended up taking a couple of days packing the place, along with giving their 30 days notices, even though they only left a couple of days after giving it. Then, while Ino is staying with her parents until the wedding, Sakura spent the rest of the week with her parents. Mainly to bring back some of that family feeling that was lost due to that fight she had with her mother.

Yet she dropped the bombshell on them that she was only there for three days, before she moves in with Naruto in his house. This time both of them expressed their concerned over the idea. While Kizashi, and a now open-minded Mebuki, don't see Naruto as the kyubi, yet he is still a male, and they wanted to make sure their daughter is sure about going through what could be considered a warm up to a married life. But Sakura told them about the kind of person Naruto is, along with how grateful she is that he has given her another chance to prove that she has changed for the better. Helping him with his heat problem that she kept to herself, since she didn't want her parents think that sex is main reason behind it.

"Oh yeah, after a day of touring my new home, along with just spending time talking, even cuddling, while we enjoy each other's company." Sakura said, getting a slight aw, "The next day was when the gloves came off and became long gone. Most of the rooms were broken in, a lot of positions were used, and no hole was spared."

While those who were close by were blushing at what they over heard, especially at a nearby table containing the ice queens, wanting to hear how a girl that is supposed to be the next upcoming of Tsunade, able to come up with cures at the drop of a hat, yet she can't seem to fix her sore ass from a night of intense pleasure.

"Wow, if Karin was here, she would demand details." Kin said, blushing at how Sakura's brief summary was more than enough to make her go grab Kiba, and show him who the bitch in the relationship really is.

"Oh I had seen Karin dragging Sasuke to her place." Hinata said, trying hard not to faint. Even though she is with Lee, she can still faint if the situation calls for it, take now for instance. "I don't believe we well be seeing them for at least a couple of days."

"Well, in that case, spill the details!" Ino demanded.

With so many eyes on her, and not liking the attention, "Ah, can't we take this some place private?" Sakura asked, not liking the whole microscope feeling.

"No, start talking!" Which was the response of every single female in the room, and somehow, Ayame was there as well, wanting to get the nitty-gritty.

Back at the Chambers

Everybody was discussing what weaknesses that they believe enemies would exploit, "Right now I have the Ex-Foundation shinobi going through all of the bases, to see if they can find any kind of information that could be of use to us." Naruto said, before turning towards the clans, more specifically Inochi and Shibi, "And since they were amongst his top ninja, we are going to need Fu and Torune's help to find anything that they might have a better chance at knowing."

Getting a nod from the pair, "I'll have Fu report to you as soon as possible." Inochi said, while Shibi confirmed it with something similar.

This was when one of the council members who weren't arrested spoke up, "Why are the former Foundation shinobi still listening to you brat?" He yelled out, being smart enough not to say the word that would cost him his head.

"Because you can't just remove years, even decades, worth of brainwashing in a heartbeat." Naruto explained, "Danzo did so much damage to them on certain levels, I just got stuck cleaning up his mess."

"Oh trust me, I know the feeling." Tsunade said, with her hands in front of her face, "When I became Hokage, I had to start cleaning up things that overwhelmed Hiruzen-Sensei when he retook the mantle, one of them involving the underhanded tactics of the people he used to be close to." She then gave a small sigh, "Although as much as I want to, I can't really blame him for all of the things that went wrong since he returned to office, considering how much crap was going on that week."

"Indeed," Hiashi said, having dealt with those headaches about a week after the Kyubi attack, "While that first week was chaotic, but imagine our surprise when we find out that the power in the council shifted to those who don't deserve."

Another council member not in jail spoke up, "What do you mean we didn't deserved that power?" She yelled out, this one being the mother of Ami, "We . . ."

"Before you finish that, let me ask you, how do you deserve that power?" Itachi asked feeling annoyed at how there are people out there who think the world owes them everything, "What did you contribute in order earn such power?"

"Chances are, they gave nothing and expect to take everything in return." Kisame said, with a slight snort, not caring that the dirty part of the council are giving them the stink eye, "In some ways, that is how Kiri's Bloodline Massacre started off without a hitch, mainly because there were those on the council that were not only jealous of those with a bloodline, but also hoping to make a lot of money thinking they were supporting the winning side."

Jiraiya decided to join in, "Although from what I understand, with the Kiri Civil War ending in favor of the rebels, and there being a new Mizukage, those same people are now in deed shit, not just in debts." He said, while still giving the stink eye to Naruto, mad because not only was he able to complete that anti-pervert seal that prevented him from getting a week's worth of material for his books, when Tsunade found out, she had Naruto mass produce the seals, and sell them through every store, along with anti-rape seals he was able to complete.

Now Naruto broke his record on fast sales with these seals. The anti-rape seals he would gladly approve of, because while yes, he is a super-pervert, and he loves to 'observe' the female body at its finest, at least to his opinion. Yet there are things that would even make him sick, one of them being raped, another is somebody being forced into doing something they don't want to do. Yet the other seal is what makes him mad, because know his sources for good research material has been drastically reduced, especially at the hot springs, now he would have to dig into his own wallet, and go to a brothel to get some action.

"Anyway, back to the topic at hand," Shikaku said, "While we wait from Naruto about what is found in Danzo's files, we also need to start looking into weak spots that could be consider both a well-known secret, and also serve as a distraction."

"Although if those three went to Akatsuki, then we better prepare for total mayhem." Itachi said, getting shocked looks from almost everybody.

Kisame nodded his head at this, "Yep," He started to say, "When you have a group of S-ranked missing nin from all the nations, chances are they'll come in and try to wipe out this village while trying to get to the brat."

Definitely wanting to get down to business, "Can you two tell us who is part of the Akatsuki?" Hiashi said, "While I know you would have told the Hokage, yet would be nice to have something to help get our forces ready to fight."

Getting a nod, Itachi was about to start, when he, and almost every male felt a slight shiver go down their spines, while a certain Jiraiya had a perverted smirk on his face. "My pervy senses are tingling." He said out loud, only to get a gavel throw right between the eyes, courtesy of one peeved Hokage.

"Are you guys alright?" Naruto asked, being one of the few who didn't get the shiver.

"I just felt a disturbance in the force." Itachi answered, before giving Naruto a slight glare, "And I can't help but shake the feeling that I have you to thank for that."

Giving him a confused look, "And why would it be my fault?" Naruto asked.

"Because the last time some of us had this feeling was when Kushina was carrying you, and she felt that Minato should give her some really extra loving." Hiashi explained, "When it comes to Uzumakis and sex, well, it gives certain parts of the population, mainly the female part, that gets an itch that requires immediate attention from their man. Which in turn, causes a good portion of the Shinobi force to become unavailable until that itch becomes satisfied." Giving a slight shake of head, "In some ways, that is how your class was filled with so many clan heirs, because Kushina had one contagious itch."

"And since there are two Uzumakis in this village, one of them now being occupied," Shikaku said, knowing that he would have to actually participate in tonight's activities with Yoshino, "Most of us won't be allowed to do anything until our significant others give their approval."

"Well shouldn't that be a good thing?" Naruto asked, catching them off guard, "I mean, with our job, and the fact that tomorrow is never a guarantee, wouldn't it be better to enjoy all the time you have with them while you still can."

This caused a lot of people in the room to start thinking what Naruto just said.

Back at the Coffee Shop

After finishing her tale of how she can be left satisfied two days after being done, the shop emptied out fast. Apparently Sakura's story made every woman there decide to plan out their nightly activities, while the men slowly filtered out, deciding to prepare for what is about to come.

The only ones left behind are the two kunoichi groups that decided to just stay around and continue their get-togethers separately. "So Sakura, you said most of the rooms were 'broken' into, which one was left alone?" Tenten asked, while the rest of the girls are still blushing up a storm due to their dirty thoughts.

Giving a small, depressing sigh, "The nursery." Sakura said, "When he moved into the compound, and cleaned it, he decided to leave what is salvageable alone for, well I guess now, our future children."

Ino, being an expert of the human mind, had a good idea why, "What was the nursery like?" She asked, getting the feeling that whatever wildfire she had in her loins are about to washed down to a spark after she hears this.

Now her next sigh sounded more sad, "It was room made by two loving parents who were more than happy to welcome a new life into the world." Sakura said, her emotions starting to show, tears starting to form, "The love can be felt strongly within that room, that it makes you feel the family that should have been, was never given a chance to be."

What was said became more than enough to make each girl feel sad after realizing, and some cases, recall some details. With Ino and Tenten, both had the happy family, the happy life, and thinking what Naruto went without made them feel guilty for reminding him of such happiness. Now it makes them want to show their parents their gratitude for being part of their lives.

For Hinata and Temari, both got to know their mothers before they died, while also watching their families fall apart right afterwards. With Hinata, Hiashi acted more like a clan head than a father, always trying to force the clan standards onto her no matter what. Yet it wasn't until the combined efforts of Naruto and Lee to remind him where his priorities should really lie. Along with Hanabi finally deciding to smile for real again, instead of acting the way the clan demands of her.

Temari was a different kind of bad. Everything fell apart when it became time for the Shukaku to find a new host, her father made the one choice that not only destroyed the family, but himself as well. In some ways, Temari tries to recall if her father was ever a good person in the first place before Gaara was born. With Gaara's life starting off so badly since birth, along with her and Kankuro being held back by their own fear of becoming their little brother's latest victim. Even though Naruto was able to help bridge the gap between the siblings, after fixing the flaws in the seal, to this day she still holds some guilt in her heart for how she acted around Gaara when he needed a sibling.

Kin can relate a bit to Naruto when it comes to being an orphan. Like him, she never got to know her parents because she grew up in an orphanage in the middle of nowhere, yet she was well loved there. Until one day, a group of missing nin started to invade it, kidnapping everybody, her included. Turned out Orochimaru was looking for some fresh blood to join his Sound Village, and she was drafted. Some of them were to be used as lab rats, while the rest, like her, were to be just cannon fodder, nothing more, with the simple duty of dying for a man who would use his own mother as a meat shield.

Hinata, being the one to know Naruto so long due to stalking him, "I take it that he took it hard when he first seen it?" She asked.

Sakura stayed silent for a bit, "Yeah, he told me that the moment he stepped in was when all of his emotions started to come out at full force, that after having a good look around, he sat down on the rocking chair, to cry all night." She said, relaying what he told her, "Finding out that he was loved, that he had a family that were waiting to welcome him to the world, only to be denied it all right after he was born."

This really got the girls to feel down, especially Sakura and Ino feeling the lowest of the group. Due to the fact that while they were busy fighting over who gets to be Sasuke's wife, when it came to Naruto, they teamed up on him just to remind him that he was unwelcomed in the village. Even though some people would say they were just being children at the time, but what they did to Naruto, is just wrong, no matter what the person age is.

Deciding to get everybody out of the mood, "So what has been going on with everybody else?" Temari asked. Which in turn, everybody happily talked about what has been going on.

Council Chambers

After finally getting back to the main topic, or rather finishing it, "Okay everyone, is there anything else that needs to be discussed?" Tsunade said, wanting to get this meeting over with.

"Yes Lady Hokage, there is one thing," Naruto said stepping up, taking the floor, "We need to start making an alliance with all of the nations."

Okay, here is the latest chapter for this fic. Sorry it takes so long to update, like I said before, life gets in the way. Read and Review, and have a Happy Memorial Day.