chapter 25
"Master Bruce…" Alfred said thoughtfully as he straightened the bedroom.
"What?" Bruce snapped. Alfred frowned and shook his head, bending down to grab another t-shirt to throw into the hamper. He was staring at a rumpled up pair of panties below the bed skirt. Shaking his head again, he spoke up.
"Nevermind… I apologize, sir." Alfred gave Bruce a cross look and then grabbed the rest of the clothes on the floor before hurrying out of the room. Something was definitely going on. Ever since Barbara came home for that few short days, Bruce had been… Alfred froze out in the highway. That was the missing link. That explained the strange behavior, not looking her in the eye that morning, the no contact with Dick, and even more worrisome, the apparent one night stands. Was it… Barbara? Alfred found it unlikely but what other explanation was there? He needed to talk to Dick again. He quickly made his way down the steps and dropped the basket to the floor of the laundry room, quickly disappearing into the Bat Cave. Typing in commands on the computer, it quickly started to ring and he leaned over the desk as he waited for the answer.
It took a few minutes. "You'd better have a damn fucking good reason to be calling me, Bruce," Dick snarled through the phone. Alfred gritted his teeth. Maybe his suspciouns were right.
"Dick," Alfred said.
"Al? What… What are you calling for? Are you okay?"
"I need answers, Master Grayson, can we please meet up today and talk? This is… This is important." Alfred flinched as he waited for the response, tapping his fingers heavily.
Dick exhaled sharply. "Yeah. Yeah, Alfred, sure. Meet me at Ramone's in an hour."
"Thank you." They hung up simultaneously and Alfred sighed, his whole body relaxing. Finally. Maybe things would start making sense now.
Alfred sipped his coffee as he looked out the window, waiting for Dick to show up. It was finally December and a light snow was dusting the streets of Gotham. He pulled his coat tighter around him, feeling chilly just from the sight. "Dark roast, two creams, one sugar?" Alfred looked up and smiled at the young man. He stood up, setting his coffee cup down on the saucer and pulled Dick in for a hug.
"You know my coffee well, sir," Alfred said, clapping him on the shoulders. "It's been too long since I've seen you. Almost two weeks. That's unusual."
Dick sighed and motioned to the seat across from him. Both of the men sat down. "I'm guessing you already have some theories about what's been going on." He ran his fingers through his dark hair, drumming the fingers of his other hand on the table.
Alfred nodded and took another drink. "Yes," He sighed. "Barbara came back from the Joker's captivity, suddenly Bruce is acting like we're all infected with something. He's angry. Angrier than ever. He's sleeping around, and you're nowhere to be seen. You and Bruce don't fight," Alfred said conspiratorially. "What's going on, Master Dick?"
Dick narrowed his eyes as he looked outside and nodded slowly. "Yeah… Remember when the Joker manipulated Harleen Quinzel over to…" He rolled his eyes. "The dark side?"
"How could I forget?"
"He's done it again," Dick said. He kicked up one foot onto the other knee casually.
A young waitress came up and smiled tightly at them. "Hello, welcome to Ramone's. Can I get you anything to drink?"
Dick smiled in response. "Just a cup of coffee, black, please." She nodded and scribbled it down as she walked away. Alfred looked at Dick with a raised eyebrow. "It's Barbara."
Alfred's brow furrowed. "How do you mean?"
"There's," He said, and then paused. "There's something wrong with her. He's turned her into some kind of weapon, an addict to... " He looked at the older gentleman with caution. "She's a nymphomaniac."
Alfred's eyes widened. "How…?"
Dick threw his hands up. "I don't know! He did something to her! She slept with Bruce, tried to sleep with me… Not saying we haven't before, but not like how she wanted it! Suddenly she wanted me to throw her around and choke her and hurt her. Not make love. She's slept with Joker and Harley… Who knows what else she's been doing since she's been gone."
Alfred sat back heavily, eyes wide and jaw tight. He didn't know what to think about any of this, he was shocked beyond belief. Little Barbara Gordon? "I never thought Joker would…" Alfred swallowed.
"Me either," Dick replied.
He glanced up at him with pursed lips, debating on what not to tell him. "She was there last night."
Dick sat up straight. "What?"
Alfred nodded. "Yes. I couldn't bring it up to Bruce. Is anyone still looking for her, or do they know she doesn't want to be found?"
"Gordon and I are looking. Haven't found anything." As if by divine occurance, his cell phone quickly started ringing. He grabbed it from his pocket and answered immediately. "Gordon? Wait, what? Slow down. Seven Eleven? You're kidding me." He looked over at Alfred with wide eyes. "I'll be there in twenty minutes." He hung up the phone and looked at Alfred. "Someone saw her. I've gotta run."
"Don't be a stranger, Master Grayson," He said sadly.
He smiled. "Never again, Al."
Alfred sighed loudly as Dick ran from cafe, quickly heading towards his house to change into his armor and meet Commissioner Gordon. The waitress walked up a moment later and sat down the mug of black coffee. "Uh, miss?"
"Yes, sir?" She asked.
With a roll of his eyes towards the window, he said, "Can I get the check?"
The Joker cracked his neck as he exited the shower. He roughly dried his green hair with a scratchy towel and then threw it down on the floor before grabbing a new shirt and slipping it over his arms. It was purple, and it went well with his vest, although not as nice as his powder blue shirt. As he began to button it, he heard Harley's voice start talking from downstairs. "Mr. J's in the shower right now, actually." He imagined her exact expression as she said it ― head cocked to the side, red lips pursed, hands on her hips. He smiled to himself, rolling up his sleeves and grabbing his vest before disappearing to the stairs. As he buttoned it up over his stomach, he raised an eyebrow. It was a cop. Not your normal men-in-blue police officer, but a detective, and one he knew very well. He leered at the man and when the detective saw him, he tensed, sweat building on his hairline. Harley squealed. "Puddin', you've got a visitor," She said sweetly.
When the Joker approached, he stroked her cheek and she grinned up at him adoringly. "Give Daddy some time alone with Detective Miles, will you, pooh?"
"Whatever you say, Mr. J," She told him and stood on her tip-toes to kiss him on his cheek. As she skipped away towards the pool table area where Barbara was sitting, the Joker turned back to the cop.
"You've got news for me, I presume?" He asked, crossing his arms. Jonas Miles had been on his payroll for three years, and had done good work for the most part. He didn't hesitate to let the Joker know everything he could, but he wasn't sloppy, like the last detective that worked for him. He assumed that the reason Miles did so well was because the pictures of what happened to the last cop were still burned into his brain. The Joker grinned a small smile.
Miles nodded. "We got a call this morning. The cashier down at the 7/11 station saw Barbara. It took her a couple days to call in because Miss Gordon threatened her. The Commissioner and Robin are still working to find her."
"They aren't making any progress, though?" The Joker asked.
"Not really. They know she was at the Batman's place the other night, and that she spent the rest of the night in the gas station bathroom, but they have no leads on her location. I overheard Robin saying they're gonna start watching the Bat Cave, wherever that is." Miles rubbed his neck, swallowing hard. Joker pursed his lips and looked over at the redhead knocking balls across the table with her pool stick. He hadn't asked her who the Batman was yet, and he didn't really want to. But if they were going to start putting security around his places of residence, it could be a problem. He couldn't decide if he wanted to know or not.
He licked his lips and then looked back at the cop with narrowed eyes. "Keep an eye on them. They won't let anyone figure out the Batman's identity, even Gordon, so Robin will be doing that part himself…" He breathed loudly. "I'll have to, uh… Have a little chat about discretion with our darling Gordon girl." Miles nodded.
"Yes, sir," He said. "I'll come back if I figure anything out."
"Do," Joker said and nodded towards the door. Miles nodded again and then disappeared as quickly as possible out the door.
I'm sorry about the shortness of this chapter guys, I'm in a bit of a slump when it's coming to writing. But hey, shit happens, right? I'll try to get a longer chapter in next time I update, I promise.
And to my lovely viewers:
Guest (1): I hope that I keep you interested through the remainder of this story! It makes me so happy to hear that people like what I write. :)
Guest (2): Yeah, I feel as though Dick/Babs shippers take the whole thing a little bit too seriously. Their relationship is too perfect, I honestly don't understand the huge appeal. Sure, it's cute sometimes, but who wants to read plain old vanilla smut about Dick and Barb anyway? And it really does. I only write things that I really want to and am into. These are the things that are erotic to me, and I have a little bit too much fun with it, and if it bothers other people, then that's their personal preference and if it's erotic to other people then that's great!
Meli: I've had multiple people make the same point! People don't want women to have big fantasies because then they won't be involved because well... They're little bitches. Pardon my french. I've gotten a bit more hate on my other Bats/Bats story, which is really discouraging, but you guys are all so supportive, it's so nice. I got into a bit of a rut when I saw the negative reviews but I've come to terms with the fact that not everyone can be pleased. (But this story is meant for pleasure, so I hope those who can be pleased enjoy it!)
deadpool: Please do. Grab an acid flower or a Bat-a-rang and let's get to work!