On The Road With Danny Concannon: 05'-'06
"To Begin Again" Pt 1
Companion Episode: Tomorrow
" What a long strange trip it's been..."
-- The Grateful Dead
Soon enough it will all be over
'Cause tomorrow is today
-William Joel
I wanna go home. 'Cause I feel so all alone.
I wanna go home. I wanna go home. Lord, I wanna go home
Ever since...I ran away. Had troubles each night and day.
That's why I wanna go home. Wanna go home
–Charles Brown
Almost three years later...
C.J. felt the warm sun of a California summer morning. But the warmth she felt wasn't just the summer morning, it was the warmth of her new life. She liked it just fine. She woke up with a smile these days more than she didn't – almost always. Life wasn't perfect, but that was okay, it was still pretty grand.
She reached her arm out to stretch, and turned to Danny's side of the bed. She smiled to find a note on his pillow.
Had to take an earlier flight. Kiss Kat for me. Miss you both already.
Love, Danny
She smiled and pulled herself out of bed. She slid into a light blue robe and secured it closed as she made her way out of the bedroom.
C.J. walked through Danny's office and through the living room, past the book cases and into the kitchen.
There she found a young blonde girl holding C.J. and Danny's red-headed child on one hip.
"Hey, C.J. I thought today was one of the days you went in to work."
"Danny had to go out of town." She kissed her baby daughter on the head and went straight for the coffee maker.
"Danny wanted me here 'cause he was finishing a chapter–do you need me today?"
"Yeah, I have some work to do in the house, but you'll probably be out of here a little after noon." C.J. finished pouring herself a cup of coffee and walked back toward the girls and the enter counter.
"I brought the papers in for you..." Karen motioned toward the papers set up on the counter in front of her.
C.J. let her free hand slip through the sets of papers laid out on the counter. "Thanks."
"Why you people get like five different papers, I have no idea."
"Habit, " she smiled. "He took the Post," she said in near-disgust, setting her coffee down next to the large stack of papers.
"No, I saw it. I must have dropped it outside..." She went for the door.
"No, Sarah I got it." C.J. gave a smile at her daughter.
C.J. quickly exited the kitchen to the left through the dinning room, past a shiny window, and out the front door. She took a few long strides, looking around for the paper. She was in a happy mood as she took sight of the lost paper on her walkway.
C.J. let her bare feet step off her cement porch and leaned forward to pick up a folded paper just steps away.
"Good morning, Mrs. Concannon." The mailman handed C.J. the mail.
"Thanks." C.J. smiled and took a look down at the mail. After a few pieces of junk mail, she paused. There, on the top of the stack, was a small off-white envelope. She knew just what it was.
THE WHITE HOUSE
A mail cart went through the halls, dropping off mail as it went. The boy from the mail room reached Sam Seaborn's office, stopped the cart and walked into the office, which had once housed Josh Lyman, many moons ago. An envelope, just like the one C.J. had received in California, was dropped onto Sam's desk. The mail boy left the office and closed the door behind him with a slam.
"I'm here. I'm awake!" Sam Seaborn's head, which had been camouflaged in the dark office, sprung from the desk in his sleepy stupor. He looked around. "I'm talking to no one."
The door opened and the voice of Sam's assistant was heard from the bullpen. "SAM!"
"I'm here, I'm here!" Sam stood at a quick pace and grabbed his jacket off the back of his chair, taking off toward the door.
Donna nodded her head at the First Lady as she was handed a stack of mail. Donna glanced at the stack off-handedly, but her eyes gave their full attention when she saw the off-white envelope. She cocked her head to the side to be sure it was what she thought it was. Donna smiled, but saw she was about to be caught at not paying attention by Helen, who called out her name with a question.
Donna looked up at the First Lady and agreed with her statement, whatever it was. Donna tried not to grin at what she held in her hand.
The mail cart made its way into the outer office of the Chief of Staff. The boy holding the cart handed Margaret, now Josh's assistant, the mail, and Margaret thanked him. The boy left and Margaret sifted through the mail for important and semi-important things. After about four pieces of mail, she fixated on a small off-white envelope. She walked the envelope into Josh's office and set it in the middle of his desk.
The Office of William Bailey
The hallway was very quiet. It was the summer and little was getting done as usual. The door read: William Bailey, Oregon. The door was opened and a Secretary was heard answering the phone next to a standing flag of Oregon.
The man walking in held mail in his hand. The man approached the main desk as Will was coming out of his office.
"I got it," said Will, dressed with his shirt sleeves rolled up. He smiled and went through his own mail. Will stopped at a small off-white envelope. Will couldn't help but smile and nod his head.
Columbia University
NYC, NY
The halls of the Columbia political science department were surprisingly cool considering it was the summer, but there was something about the old marble-floored school building during the summer sessions that kept the heat at bay – perhaps the it was the emptiness. The halls weren't as bustling as they would have been during the school year, although they were still busy enough, and filled with dim shadows and streaming light. It had that ivy league feeling.
Toby Ziegler walked out of his class room along with the scurry of young people escaping like a flood. Toby held a bag over one shoulder, and about three stacks of papers and books under his other arm.
A young boy followed on his heels like a puppy. "Mr. Ziegler, this is not a C paper, this is an A paper. I worked really hard on this one."
"Well, work harder."
"I did. I stayed up late. I read all the books, I did all the research."
"It doesn't matter if you did all the research and read all the books, " he laughed. "There's no weight to your argument."
They turned a corner.
"Just because you don't believe..."
Toby laughed, "It doesn't matter if I don't agree with your argument. It doesn't matter if you don't agree with your agreement."
"An opposition paper? You didn't say--"
"You have to be able to argue your own point and someone else's, Mr. Hockney. You think I like teaching summer classes, Mr. Hockney? You think it's the highlight of my day to come here and teach people who would rather be out at Coney Island? You don't think I'd rather sit in Central Park with a good woman and watch Shakespeare in the Park."
"You like Shakespeare in the Park?"
"Of course I like----" He looked the kid in the eyes. "You need more conviction. It's not all images and flowery language." He used his back to enter the offices of the political science department.
Toby turned into the office and encountered a large woman with a sour look on her face.
"Hello, Ms. Maxwell and how are we?" Toby said with sarcasm and a smile upon meeting the red-haired receptionist.
"It depends." She groaned dryly. "How long until I get to crack open the bottle of bourbon in my left-hand drawer?"
Toby chuckled, "Not long enough."
The woman smirked evilly. One could tell they both liked each other.
She handed Toby his messages and some mail.
Toby saw the young boy had still not left him alone. Toby gave him a look and yet he didn't move. "Go home, Mr. Hockney." Toby took his messages from the woman.
"I still think this is crap, Mr. Ziegler. That was a good paper." The boy followed Toby toward his office.
"Okay." Toby stopped, halfway down the hallway, and looked at the boy. "You think that paper was good?"
"I do."
"I think it's mediocre." Toby paused and waited for the boy to budge.
"I don't agree."
"Okay, then." Toby paused. " I want you to write me a ten page position paper on how your paper was the best thing since the Gettysburg Address. And how I'm a horse's ass for not getting Josh Lyman right on the phone to get you an office next to the Rose Garden."
"Can I write it on the back of an envelope?" the boy said with a cocky tone.
"You can write in on a box top from a Cracker Jack box, for all I care. Just make it good." Toby walked the three steps to the door of his office.
"Okay..." yelled the boy with a giddy smile.
"I want it by Monday." Toby walked onto his office.
"Yes, sir." And the kid was off and running.
Toby dropped the books and papers onto his desk. He threw his mail and his messages next to his books and papers, causing the mail to slide over to one side with a small sound.
Toby circled his desk and sat down with a large breath, setting his bag on the desk next to him with a crack. It almost knocked over the pictures of his kids and of C.J. and her daughter that were sitting on his desk.
Then he saw it.
Toby took his reading glasses out of his pocket and lifted the envelope up into the light for a better look. He was pretty shocked to see what it was.
"Ha..." he remarked out loud. Shocked wasn't even the word.
Santa Monica, CA
C.J. looked at the envelope. She had almost forgotten she was now standing in the middle of her walkway wearing just her robe and a night gown. She walked back into the house holding the paper and the rest of the mail under her arm. She closed the door behind her as she read the address label: The Bartlet Presidential Library. She turned the envelope over and started to open it.
And every one of us
Has to face that day
Do you cross the bridge?
Or do you fade away?
And every one of us
That ever came to play
Has to cross the bridge
Or fade away
—Elton John The Bridge
January 2006
Two years and six months before...
Danny walked into the empty house that he would spend the rest of his future in. His feet echoed through the empty house. The sun shined off the wood paneled floor.
A woman walked ahead of him holding a clipboard. All Danny heard was her voice as he looked around the house.
"It has a large sunken living room, great neighborhood, a pool in the backyard."
Danny could feel in his gut that this was the place. He smiled.
"It has an office and three bedrooms. Perfect for a family."
"Oh..." Danny caught her last words. "No, it's just the two of us." Danny walked over to the large sliding door. "Is the pool out here?" he asked, almost giddy.
Danny slid open the sliding door and looked out at the gorgeous backyard. He laughed. "You'll have to excuse me." He smiled. "I've never had a home of my own."
"The two extra bedrooms are perfect for an exercise room, and a guest room of course, a second office perhaps? Would you like to see the bathrooms? " the woman asked.
"Yeah, yeah..." Danny nodded his head and followed the woman toward the back of the house.
Almost Three years later...
June 2008
A Month before the Library Opening
Santa Monica, CA
The sun shined huge.
C.J. swam in her own pool, in her own house, on her own actual weekend day off. How nice it felt. The bird chirped and the trees rustled a bit. It was a California day.
C.J. lifted her head above water with a splash and a sigh as the water ran off her face.
"C.J.!" Danny yelled to get her attention. He walked out of the sliding door and into the back yard.
C.J. turned her attention to him.
"Look who stopped by." Danny had a huge smile on his face and took his attention back toward the sliding door he had used to enter the backyard.
"Hey." Josh Lyman, his backpack over one arm, pulled off his sunglasses and stepped out into the patio.
Donna took a step after him and waved. "Hi." Her huge smile was glowing.
C.J. smiled.
"I thought you guys said you couldn't stop by," C.J. twisted off the top of her bottled water and sat down at the kitchen table. There were a few plates of food on the table.
"We didn't think we could but–" Donna started talking, standing behind Danny.
Josh finished her thought. "Change of plans, the President had to change around an event." Josh sat next to C.J. who sat next to Danny.
Danny shook his head while his daughter rested on his lap and he fed her. It was a gorgeous image of the two.
Donna stared at the baby. "She's gorgeous, C.J." Donna looked over at C.J. She bent down to take a closer look, holding her hair back slightly with her hands. She smiled huge.
Danny and C.J. smiled.
"I think she looks like you, C.J."
"Thank god for small favors." Danny chuckled.
The baby fussed and Danny took the bottle out of her mouth. He handed it to C.J. who stood and walked toward the sink.
"Can I?" Donna put her hands out with her huge smile.
"Sure..." Danny said with pride and in his Michigan tones.
Donna put her hands out and Danny, with two firm hands on the baby, handed her to Donna.
"Ahh..." Donna took the baby and held her with both hands, before taking the baby to her hip and starting to bounce her around for a moment. "Ohh... she's just so cute. Look at her."
The baby smiled and made gleeful noises.
C.J. came back to the table and smiled at Donna holding her child.
Danny looked at C.J. and smiled before looking back at Donna.
Donna smelled the top of the baby's head. "Ahh, she even has that baby smell..."
"Like a new car smell," Danny joked.
"Ohhhh, I want one..." Donna cooed.
Josh went pale.
Donna gave Josh one of her looks. "Don't freak out, loverboy, I didn't mean right now."
"What? What? I choked on an almond." Josh defended himself badly.
Danny laughed.
"Really..." C.J. trilled out with a sly look. She knew him way too well. In fact everyone in the room, excluding the baby, knew him so well.
"What? What?" Josh was feeling very defensive.
Donna set the baby down in the small bassinet to her left.
"Nice house? This new?" Josh asked.
"We've lived here for almost three years, Josh," C.J. smirked at him.
"Yeah, I'm sorry, we..."
"I know the life Josh, you have nothing to be sorry about." C.J. was firm.
"Well, it's a nice place."
"Thank you."C.J. answered.
Danny took C.J.'s hand.
"So, you goin' to this thing, the library?" Josh asked.
Donna took a seat.
"Of course." C.J. looked at Josh."I put my blood, sweat, and tears into that presidency. They should be naming a wing in that place after me."
Danny chuckled.
"You know Toby got an invite." Josh put it out into the room.
"Yeah, he told me."
"I told him he should go."
"Me too." C.J. leaned forward, outstretching her hand and leaned her arms on the table.. "Anyone figure out he's writing speeches for Santos here and there?"
"How'd you know... I told him he couldn't even tell you about that!"
"Cadence." Danny and C.J. said at the same time.
Donna tried not to giggle.
"You too are spending way to much time together." Josh grumbled.
"Ya thin,." C.J. said in her great sarcastic way. She leaned back in her chair.
The baby cried.
"Right on cue." Danny stood. "I'm gonna put her down for her nap." Danny picked up his child with a huge smile and walked her out of her room.
Donna gave a cute face as the baby passed her. Donna's phone went off. "Sorry." She took the phone to her ear. "Yes, Ma'am." Donna put her hand up. "Excuse me." She let herself out of the room.
C.J., with a nod of her head, gave her an "of course" gesture.
C.J. and Josh watched her leave.
"So, you got yourself a little instant family here." Josh turned to C.J.
"I don't know about that..." C.J. smiled awkwardly. She looked away and down for a moment as she leaned back. She looked at Josh.
Josh smiled. "I never saw anyone more waitin' for a family to come along and hit them on the head."
C.J. smirked
"I'm just...happy for ya, Claudia Jean."
C.J. smiled sweetly at Josh. She took a sigh. "You too, Joshua."
"I told Toby he should go," he stressed again.
"Me too," she said softly with her eyebrows raised.
"The President invited him."
"That's what I said." C.J. said softly.
"He deserves to be there."
"Yeah..." She nodded her head.
Danny came back into the room. He smiled at Josh and his wife.
"She down?" C.J. asked.
"Yeah."
Donna came back into the room. "I'm sorry. The First Lady needed me for a moment. Nothing huge. We still have about half an hour before we have to go." She sat down and smiled. "She seems like such a good baby, C.J. "
Danny and C.J. smiled.
"Does she sleep through the night?" Donna inquired.
Danny and C.J. laughed.
"Not at first, but she's gettin' there." Danny sat on a stool next to the center counter.
"Do you think you'll have more?" Donna took a hand full of grapes from a plate and put one in her mouth.
"Ohh, no..." C.J. stood up. "Danny's having a vasectomy."
"C.J.!" Josh yelled out with a little food in his mouth.
"Excuse me?" Danny was shocked."When did we decided this?" Danny asked C.J.
"I'm sorry, I thought it was just assumed."
"You know this seems like a private..."Josh stood half way up.
"Don't go!" C.J. firmly put her hand out but kept her focus on Danny.
Danny shook his head. "That's fine. I'm fine with it." He tried not to say something they would both regret. " I just wished we'd discussed it before hand."
"Ahh...no, really..." Donna felt awkward. "I think maybe we should go in the other–"
"Stay where you are!" Danny put his hand out to Donna.
Josh and Donna didn't know what to do.
"We have our hands full as it is." C.J. continued their conversation.
Josh's beeper went off. He looked down at it. "Saved by the bell."
Donna looked down at her beeper which was also sounding. Her face didn't look good. "We gotta go."
"Yeah..." Josh nodded his head while still looking at his pager.
Josh and Donna gave each other looks.
Danny and C.J. saw it.
"Something wrong?" Danny asked.
Josh smirked. "I can't say." He looked at C.J. and Danny. "Welcome to the outside lookin' in." He grabbed his jacket off the chair next to his.
"We gotta..." Donna motioned. "I'm sorry, C.J." She kissed C.J. on the cheek. "We'll call."
Josh shook Danny's hand."Nice job on the procreation, there." He quickly put his jacket on with a smile.
"Thanks," Danny smirked.
Danny and C.J. walked Josh and Donna to the door. They watched them leave, followed by three secret service agents.
C.J. closed the door and turned to see Danny standing in front of her.
"Do you want to have more children?"
"Ah..." Danny laughed. "Yeah, of course, I mean– not if... I don't think it's such a good idea to put you through that again. Not if it's not safe." He shook his head.
"I agree." She sounded a little disappointed.
"It all just seem so... permanent."
"Well, it kinda is..."
"No, I don't mean..." he raised his eyebrow.
"Yeah.." She paused. "They don't call it a late in life baby for nothin'." She sounded as disappointed as Danny was. "We have our hands full as it is."
"Yeah." Danny nodded his head in his understanding way.
"Not to mention, I'd just feel saver."
Danny took her hands. "Okay."
"I'd love to have another child, Danny, but not at 47. Not at 50. –"
"It's okay." He assured her. "I agree."
"Thank you," she said slowly.
"The things I do for you, " he joked to make her laugh.
"You can't tell me I'm not grateful. " She tried to lighten up the mood.
"Yeah," he smiled.
C.J. took a breath and walked away from Danny. Danny followed.
C.J. looked behind her. "Why do I feel like our past just sprinted out that door." She smiled bittersweetly and walked into the living room.
"Yeah..." Danny nodded his head. C.J. walked back into the main part of the house. Danny couldn't help looking toward the door and remembering the past.
If you hear a voice call out your name
Saying you stop yourself from failing
And if he strikes you in his fear and shame
Well you can leave him to his ruin
January 21st 2006
The Past...
Danny was handed a pair of keys.
"Congratulations, Mr. Concannon, you have a home."
Danny held the keys in his hand and nodded his head. He took a deep breath.
And if your dreams they wake in the night
And your heart is it a pounding
And if you cry out as you wake in your fright
And the wind it is a-howling
C.J. picked her pictures off her desk with a bittersweet smile. She looked at each one with a nostalgic love and placed them in her purse.
Maybe it's time to find another place
Where nobody even knows your face
No need to be afraid
For it's only freedom calling
Danny sipped his coffee cup and stood in the empty living room which would soon be his home. Two boxes stood next to him, a small television blaring the Matt Santos swearing-in.
Five, four, three, two, one. It was all over. Eight years of waiting. It was all over. Danny, too, felt that bittersweet feeling, for C.J.
Danny smiled and chuckled a little.
C.J. handed Josh her keys and her last vestige of the White House was gone.
She was walking out with nothing but the clothes off her back. The way she came in.
C.J. made her way down the hall and caught site of Carol.
"Carol," she smiled.
Carol smiled at her. "It was a pleasure, C.J."
"Carol, what are you doing after this?"
"Today?" She laughed. "Tomorrow?" She smiled, "I got a job in treasury."
"Really?"
"I know, not as glamorous, but it's a job," she joked.
"Carol..." her voice went up as she spoke. "What would you think of coming to work with me in California? And I don't mean just answering phones. That too, but what you did here for me– and we'd work on you getting more responsibility as things went along. What would you say to that?"
"I'd like that," she was touched. "I really would."
"Good, then." C.J. smiled and put her hand on Carol's arm."When you get things settled here, give me a call and we'll get things going."
"Okay." Carol was thrilled.
C.J. smiled and walked off, she looked so calm and peaceful. She looked like she once again had a strong purpose. She'd never looked so at home in her own skin.
If your tears begin to overflow
As you walk against the under tow
No need to be afraid. For it's only freedom calling.
If you're sad because you're all alone
And your hands they are a-shaking
And your miracle cure's not working anymore
and the floods bank's close to breaking
And after she left the press room, C.J. Cregg walked off into the streets of Washington, DC and never looked back.
Suddenly you're on an open unknown road.
Passing all the heavy, long wide loads.
It is time to make your great escape
And you can hear your freedom calling
I wanna dive into the sea of love,
but my knees they are a-quaking.
I can see myself high up above
And there's no time left for faking.
C.J. disappeared into the background of nameless people.
I no longer need to understand what it truly means to be a man.
Only when I gave up on my master plan. Did I then hear freedom calling.
Did I then hear freedom calling...
–Freedom Calling - Colin Hay
Danny turned off his television.
The Dedication to the Bartlet Library
New Hampshire
Almost three years later...
Danny closed the door on his rental car and walked over to the other side of the car just as C.J. opened her own car door. Danny helped her the rest of the way by holding the door open for her.
They smiled at each other.
The summer New Hampshire air felt warm and comforting on their skin.
C.J. took her purse and hid it under her car seat. Not that it mattered with a few dozen secret service agents around.
She took a step away from the door looking up at the structure she had only seen in pictures and planning sketches.
Danny closed the car door behind her.
"Ready?" Danny asked.
"Yeah.." She let out a large breath of air with a large anticipatory smile. Her grin was huge.
Danny smiled back.
They took hands, clasping them together with a tight grip. They walked past the fountain and the people milling around, and over the brick drive in front of the of the building.
"Ms. Cregg? Mr. Concannon?" said the voice of a man in a suit.
"Yes?" Danny answered for both of them.
"Some people requested by President Bartlet are waiting in the lobby for him. You're welcome to wait in there for him if you'd like."
"Thank you." C.J. thanked the man for both of them.
Danny let go of C.J.'s hand and let her walk up the steps in front of him. After a brief moment Danny followed his wife and the mother of his child.
THE END OF CHAPTER 25 Pt 1
To be continued...