Torn Between Two
Chapter 25
Over the next few days, Eragon felt like he was losing Reilyn somehow. The girl had grown more silent, offish, and aggressive. At first, Eragon presumed it was merely the fact that she was back in the place where violent memories slept, but now he wasn't sure.
The problems just keep piling up, he thought, watching her toy with a branch on a nearby tree. First, we're kidnapped, then we find that the Varden can do nothing to retrieve us because they lost their best fighters. Now, Rei is pushing everyone away and we're being forced to swear loyalty to those we despise.
"Reilyn," he whispered, keeping his distance. She had become apt to walk away if people tried to get too close.
Her brown eyes looked at him, killing him. They were no longer the eyes of his best friend, but those of an emotionless stranger. He fought the temptation to just break down and cry.
"There are ways around loyalty oaths," he said. "They can be undone, cancelled out. . ."
"I will not swear loyalty to these murdering bastards!" she yelled, turning on him. "I would rather die a slow death!"
"I understand that, Rei. I really do," he whimpered.
"No! You don't!" she moved in on him. "No one does! You don't have any idea the things I've suffered at these hands!"
Eragon held his ground, shakily, letting the teen get inches from him. He flinched when she rose her hands and clenched them into fists, praying she wouldn't hit him. . .again.
"You couldn't possibly understand what they turned me into," her rising voice was quickly filling with tears. "I don't even know what or who I am anymore!"
Reilyn pinned him to the brick wall behind them, arms braced on either side of him, her eyes wild and angry, and her mouth twisted into an animal snarl. She panted, a faint growl in her throat, and stared into his soul.
"Rei," Eragon breathed, reaching up to touch her. She backed away from him, slapping his hands away, growling like a trapped creature.
"Don't!" she yelped, turning and darting off.
Eragon went to follow her, but Murtagh grabbed him around the waist. Eragon struggled against the older boy, trying desperately to squirm free.
"Let her go, Eragon," Murtagh ordered gently.
Eragon started to protest but was silenced when the elder nipped his neck playfully. Since Reilyn had starting avoiding everyone, the two boys had come closer together. Murtagh was the only person Eragon could turn to, Saphira was blocked from him for the time being, and the older boy still let him know who had more power. He was commanded around and trained mercilessly by the elder, but at least Murtagh was there for him.
"I said," Murtagh bit harder, making Eragon gasp. "Let her go."
"Murtagh," he mewled, gasping for air. "Not. . .now."
The pale teen growled into his neck, licking and kissing, but let up. Eragon smiled as he knew he had managed to keep Murtagh in check this time. The older boy's arms wrapped tighter around his waist and his neck was kissed lightly. Eragon turned and kissed his mouth lightly, moving to the pale neck, nuzzling into him. His emotions broke and he started to sob quietly.
"I'm losing her, Murtagh!" he wailed. "She's shoving me away!"
"She's shoving everyone away," the elder said gently, kissing Eragon's neck.
"How can I get her back?"
"I honestly can't answer that for you, Eragon," the teen sighed. "I can talk to her if you like."
Eragon was speechless, he only found himself able to nod and move closer to Murtagh. The raven haired teen pulled back, lifting Eragon's face, and stared at the boy. Eragon ran his hands in the beautiful hair, holding two handfuls gently, and pulled him down, kissing hard. He felt Murtagh smile and smiled in return, kissing again.
"Thank you," he whispered in between kisses.
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After Murtagh told Eragon to stay and practice his archery, informing a guard to keep an eye on the boy, he went to his room and sat, waiting on the bed.
She's becoming too much like me. . .I won't let her push everyone who cares away. . .
Reilyn flung the door open, stalking in. She threw her sword, belt and all, to the floor, then removed the dagger from her boot and flicked it into the floor. Glaring at Murtagh, she went to the bathroom and slammed the door.
Here we go, he thought, sighing.
He quickly moved from the bed, grabbing her weapons, as well as removing his own, and set them outside the bedroom door. He silently locked the door and stood in front of it, arms crossed.
When Reilyn emerged from the bathroom, drying her face with a towel, and saw Murtagh, she growled. The towel was tossed at him and she moved to the chair instead of the door, glaring at him. She had grown accustomed to walking the vast grounds when she wasn't training and was rarely seen by anyone.
"What?" she snapped.
"What the hell do you think?" he barked back, moving form the door and sitting on the edge of the bed.
Murtagh, Thorn said, getting rough and shouting at her is not going to make this any easier.
Right. . .I know. . .
He sighed and moved to the other side of the bed, sitting in front of her, and ran his hands roughly in his hair. He held his head in his hands, elbows resting on his kneed, and tried to calm down. He scrubbed his face and looked at her.
"I'd like to speak with you," he said evenly.
The girl said nothing, staring at him with well guarded eyes, and shrank back in the chair. Murtagh closed his eyes a moment, fending off his anger, and rubbed his neck. He was tense, very tense.
"You can't keep people away," he breathed. "It's not way to live. . .I would know."
The pale girl snorted laughter and looked away from him, turning her whole body in the large chair. Murtagh could see she was starting to break, she could keep up the walls unless confronted head on for a longer period of time than Eragon was willing to try.
"You don't know," she growled.
"I don't?" he asked, leaning on his knees and staring at her.
"No."
"Really?" he snorted a laugh. "How could that be? I've suffered at the hands of my father, just like you, worse than you. I watched that man kill my mother, the only person who made me feel safe, and you're telling me that I don't know?!"
"You forget," she growled loudly. "I saw my parents murdered by him too." She moved and put her face close to his. "I smelled their blood and listened to them plead for their lives, for mine! And still he killed them, laughing! I don't even know why!"
Her brown eyes filled with a lifetime of pain and suffering as she stared into his. She had just ripped her wall down and stood alone in the ruin, wanting closeness, but terrified of it. He saw her clench her jaw, trying to keep it steady.
Thorn? What do I do?
Comfort her, but do so gently, easily, slowly
Murtagh slowly put his hand on her neck, feeling her pull away, and gently ran his thumb on her jaw line. She shut her eyes and turned away, trying to shrink back, but he held her in place. He shifted, moving closer, and fought back his own tears. He could feel her fighting his comfort with every fiber of her being; he saw tears on her pale face and he brushed them away. Her whole body trembled and she tensed, as if she expected him to strike her. He pulled her to him, closing his eyes as emotions washed over him.
How could I forget?
Reilyn went rigid against him and shoved at his chest, but he held firm. She shivered and gave in, wrapping her arms around his waist and curling to him He felt her clutch the back of his vest and he gently rested his head on hers, rubbing her back and playing with her hair.
"Shhh," he soothed, crying himself.
The girl whimpered and hid her face in his chest, crying freely. He gently kissed her hair, moving back farther onto the bed. He leaned against the headboard and she stayed curled to him, but she was finally calming down.She moved and put her head on his shoulder, breathing lightly on his neck. Her hands traced light patterns on his sides and Murtagh felt his eyes close.
Oh god, he thought, breathless.
Lips pressed to his neck and he gasped, heart pounding. Reilyn flinched when he gasped and hid her face in his shoulder, her hands stopped moving.
No, he whined internally.
He nuzzled into her cool neck waiting to see if that would be accepted. . .it was. Slowly, he kissed her neck, just brushing her skin with his lips. She sucked in a breath and flinched, breath picking up, but she stayed put. Murtagh shifted, putting his hands on her waist, and kissed again, with a little more force. Reilyn shivered and broke into gooseflesh, her hands tightening on his sides.
Careful, he warned himself. Go slow. Don't scare her again.
He kissed lightly, licking her skin a little, and moved to her jaw. His hands moved up her waist, to her neck and then her face. Butterfly kissing her neck and then up to her lips. The girl took a shuddery breath and closed her eyes. Murtagh moved back to her neck, savoring the sounds she made, and gasped when he felt her kiss his neck again, oh so carefully.
She's still very unsure, Murtagh, Thorn warned. Watch yourself.
I am
Don't go too far. She may think this is something she has to do and won't stop on her own.
I won't go too far, Thorn.
Best not. . .
Murtagh sighed as the girl kissed a little more, he nuzzled her neck and stroked her hair. He was torn between what to do and not to do, he longed to kiss her mouth, but didn't want to scare her.
"I want. . ." he whispered, almost silently, ". . .to kiss you."
Reilyn nodded into his neck, slowly. He wondered briefly if he was going too far, pushing to much, too fast, when she kissed his neck lightly. He moaned as her cool lips moved up his skin, reaching the jaw line they stopped.
"Close your eyes," he whispered, almost pleaded. "You can stop me anytime, I want you to if I go too far."
Her brown eyes fell shut and she was shivering slightly as Murtagh kissed the corner of her lips. The older boy slowly locked his mouth with hers, running his hands in her hair and down her sides. A hand touched his face as she kissed back tentatively and he smiled. He carefully ran the tip of his tongue on her lips, not asking permission, just tasting her. He was stunned when the cool lips parted slightly and he eased further in. He kissed deeper, cupping her face, and tried to get her to interact. He slowly traced shapes on her tongue, feeling his way around her mouth, making it familiar. When he moved back, she faltered but followed, finally interacting.
Quick learner, he thought, pleased.
The girl traced his tongue carefully, shifting closer to him. He playfully battled her tongue, gently urging her on. She pulled back, turning away, and pushed him away easily. He whined at the loss of contact, not being able to stop the sound, and caught a scared glance.
"No," he whispered, "it's fine."
Murtagh leaned in and kissed her cheek, then got off the bed and slowly walked to the door, unlocking it and setting her weapons inside. He collapsed back against the door after he had exited and tried to catch his breath.
My god! he thought, smiling wide.
He closed his eyes and licked his lips, tasting the ghost of her, then shoved himself off the door to go speak with Eragon.