CHAPTER THIRTY THREE
IN THE GENES
SAM ULEY JNR:
I picked myself up from the trees where Etienne had thrown me just in time to see Leah being spirited away on his back. She seemed to hang there quite lifeless and limp. I shuddered with self hatred and disgust as I limped over to where Bella and Edward were embracing. "Where is he taking her?" I asked the couple. Bella turned to face me, her topaz eyes blazing with anger and hostility towards me, and who could blame her? I had behaved despicably, I saw that now. I was so wrapped up in my hatred of Etienne that I had began to look at events with tunnel vision. Now Leah was hurt, most possibly dying and it was all my fault. Looks like the apple didn't fall far from the tree after all. "Sam just what were you playing at? Luring Etienne here with the intention of killing him? Why? Because he dared to fall in love with one of your kind?" Bella spat angrily at me, a low growl rumbling in her throat. "And don't even get me started on Jacob! You and the others hurt him! I noticed they ran off when Etienne came back, the cowards!" she added, her voice full of venom. Edward discreetly restrained her with a pale hand applied to her shoulder. I looked down at the ground, unable to face the completely deserved wrath of Bella Cullen.
I felt sick to my stomach. I had never meant to hurt Leah. Oh yeah? A little voice asked inside my mind. You didn't mean to hurt Emily either. I tried to block out the memory of my claws raking down Emily's beautiful face, but now I saw Leah and her blurred together in one awful incident. I clutched at my hair and shook my head, trying to dispel the awful visions in my head. Now Emily and Leah stood staring at me, tears pouring down their faces. "I didn't mean it! I didn't mean to hurt either of you!" I cried out loud as I stumbled out of the clearing and into the woods. "Sam! You come back and answer me!" Bella screamed loudly behind me. But I ran blindly into the trees trying to escape the images which whirled around my brain. No one followed me as I made my way into La Push and down to First Beach. I ran along the sand until my breathing was ragged and my lungs ached. I slumped down onto the big flat rock which looked like a good place to lie. The Winter sky loomed over me, swollen and dark with heavy black clouds. The frosty air burned my chest and bitter tears were flowing freely down my cheeks.
My father had proved himself to be a loser, now I was becoming like him. I didn't know how I had gotten so full of hatred. The vampires had never caused us any harm, yes Etienne had used his power on me but he didn't hurt me in any way. He only wanted to help out Bella. I took it too far then as well. Bella didn't mean to harm Jacob, the treaty was outdated by then. It was only me who had a bee in his bonnet about it all. Bella had to be changed or else she would have died. Now it looked like the same thing might be happening right now to Leah. I clawed at my face in anguish. I didn't want Leah to be dead, or undead! What could I do now? How I wish I could take back my actions!
Whatever Leah's fate was it was all my fault. How could I live with myself now? How could I explain this to Emily. I couldn't stand my thoughts any longer. I got up and ran straight towards the shore line, where the grey waves broke angrily onto the sand.
The cold sea welcomed me with open arms.